


Rubber King and Mirror Master

by LonlyWanderer



Category: One Piece
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Canon till it isn't, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Especially pairings, F/F, F/M, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Tagging, Multi, OC Devil Fruits, OC characters, Technical crossover characters, but not really, tags update as story progresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-06
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2018-12-24 19:31:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 36
Words: 135,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12019500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LonlyWanderer/pseuds/LonlyWanderer
Summary: What if Luffy had another older 'brother' besides Sabo and Ace, one who followed him on his journey to be pirate King? Between Monkey D Luffy and Serpens D Kaos, the Grand Line (and the Marines) won't know what hit them. Mutli pairings in future as well as extra crewmates.





	1. 1st Step towards the One Piece

LW: I really need to learn to stick to one story. But it won’t be today. OUAT, DC/CW, HP/BLEACH, why not add another anime to the pile? Damn you Tekking101! Anyway, enjoy everyone.

Luffy: Hi everybody, One Piece is written by Eiichiro Oda, currently only Serpens D Kaos and his (currently unmentioned but at least implied to possess) Devil Fruit belong to Lonly. Please support the awesomeness of the Real One Piece as well as Tekking’s manga reviews and info vids.

Rubber King and Mirror Master – 1st step toward the One Piece

A grinning Monkey D. Luffy bounced along happily as he made his way to the docks of Foosha Village, glad Marino was there as well as the mayor and a few others

‘Good luck Luffy, try not cause too much trouble’ she says, pinching his cheek and smiling as hissing laughter is heard from the boat

‘Sesesese, given where we’re going and what we’re going to be doing, I doubt he’ll be able to keep it for long’ the older teen smirked, eyes hidden under his hat, moving over just before Luffy hopped onto the boat

‘Still, at least try keeping your brother from doing anything too stupid too often okay Kaos?’ Makino asks with a sigh

He laughs ‘That’s a full time job, but I’m fine with that’ he looked over at the straw-hat wearing idiot he’d claimed as a younger brother years ago, if Luffy was heading into danger, then Serpens D Kaos wouldn’t be far behind. Pushing his own hat down and wrapping his coat tighter around himself he called ‘Time to go Luffy, before the weather has time to really screw us over’

‘Kay’ Luffy kicks them off then bounced to the front of their little boat to yell ‘Look out world, here comes the future King of the Pirates!’ smiling the entire time

‘ _Never abandon that dream Monkey_. Sea King’ Kaos calls just as the creature’s head pops up out of the water

‘Hi Lord of the Coast’ Luffy greets ‘We’re off on an adventure. So. Let. Us. Pass.’ He orders, punching the sea king, causing it to screech and groan before sinking below the waves once more ‘Away!’ he calls cheerfully, Kaos just smiles behind him.

 

_ Later _

 

‘You couldn’t have chosen a worse day if you tried Monkey’ Kaos complains as their boat is pulled into a whirlpool

‘Calm down and get in the barrel’ Luffy orders, the older boy sighs but does as he was told

‘Fine just remember to seal it correctly; water doesn’t agree with either of us these days’ he replies with a sigh

A little later the barrel is found and brought on board a cruise ship, something common in the East Blue due to its overall lack of real pirate activity. A ‘fact’ that was either unknown to or more likely ignored by the owner of the bright pink ship that showed up alongside it. The cannons fired then the crew boarded, the pirate captain: a large woman in a cowboy hat grinned widely (as expected) before turning to the small pink haired boy beside her.

‘Coby! Who is the most beautiful woman on the sea?’

The boy gulped and stuttered ‘Y-y-you are Alvida’ which made her smile grow

‘Exactly, now prove it and get me their treasure!’ she orders, Coby freezes in fear, minus his knees knocking ‘Coby, do you need encouragement?’ she asks, pudgy fingers wrapping around the handle of a large spiked mace, bigger than the boy’s entire body.

‘N-n-no Alvida’ Coby yelps fearfully swinging to the other ship to away from the mace and its wielder.

How he managed to make it to the store room without being spotted Coby didn’t know, but when he saw the barrel the sailors hadn’t had time to properly store before being attacked he had an idea. Pushing it onto its side the fearful cabin boy began to roll it out of the room, until he was stopped by his ‘crewmates’

‘What you got there Cabin Boy?’ One sneered while his friend righted the barrel

‘A barrel, probably filled with booze. Alvida would want it brought straight to her, unopened’

‘Well she won’t know if you keep your big mouth shut’ the 2nd grunted, preparing to open it with his sword, until it explodes and the pirate was knocked out by a solid punch to the face

‘ _Yawn_. That was good nap. Hm, wonder where the food is in this place’ Luffy thinking aloud, turning and dropping into the storage, ignoring the 3 guys staring at him ‘Yay meat!’ he cheers before proceeding to stuff his face

‘Who, who are you?’ One asks, getting annoyed when Luffy continues to ignore them, until he drops it with a yelp, getting a deep gash on his hand for his troubles

‘That’s not a nice way to greet someone or to introduce oneself’ was heard behind Coby, causing him to turn and Luffy to finally look up

The guy who spoke was a couple of years older than Luffy and a lot taller and thinner, pale with green eyes, dressed in comfortable shoes, black pants, and a ruby red shirt. On his shoulders was a deep purple cape/cloak with a shiny/reflective inner surface, his short purple hair hidden under a black fedora with a silver ribbon. The weapon was a khopesh with a serrated edge similar to a circular saw, attached to his arm by what looked to be a thick cord going from the hilt of the blade to somewhere under his sleeve

‘Where’d you come from?’ Coby asked, Kaos just points to the … well its shrapnel now after Luffy made his escape ‘But, how’d you both fit in it?’

‘It was roomier than it looked, not as much as it is now but still … ah dang it Luffy, look at the mess you’ve made of my coat’ he grumbled, Coby seeing the cloak was creased in a ‘spider on crack’ kind of pattern

‘Would you have preferred to drown?’ Luffy retorts, jumping out of the cellar and tossing him an apple

‘Hey quit ignoring us, can’t you see we’re pirates’ the third finally spoke, his still conscious companion having retrieved his sword before they charged

‘Luffy’ Kaos hissed

‘I got it’ Luffy replies, Coby gulps and hides his head in his hands, hearing the clang of metal then silence. Looking up he is shocked to see Luffy unharmed, Kaos spinning his weapon on it’s cord, and the 2 Alvida pirates holding half swords, one now sporting a cut directly across his chest. Looking down Coby sees the men’s swords had been cut practically in 2 and those halves lay at Luffy’s feet.

 

‘I said I had it’ Luffy complains while Kaos rolls his eyes

 

‘Didn’t look like it from here. Now do you guys have anything else?’ he asks with a toothy grin, causing them to run out of the room as fast as they could, dragging their friend with them ‘Hm, that was boring’ he almost appeared to pout before like Luffy descended to the store room looking for food.

 

‘What are you people?’ Coby whispers, not expecting an answer

 

‘I’m Monkey D Luffy, that’s my big brother Serpens D Kaos. Hey, where exactly are we? Is this a pirate ship?’ Luffy answers then asks his own question

 

‘This ship isn’t but it’s currently being boarded and attacked by Alvida’s pirates’ Coby explained

 

‘So are you a pirate?’ Kaos asks from below

 

‘Um not exactly’

 

‘What ya mean?’ Luffy looks confused

 

‘I got on a fishing boat, didn’t know until they reappeared it was a pirate vessel. I’ve been their chore boy for the last 2 years, doing everything they ask so they don’t kill me’ Coby says sadly, until something bounces off his head

 

‘Sounds like you’re either an idiot, coward or you’ve gotten complacent. I don’t like you’ Kaos says, a small smile still in place

 

‘Luffy sighs; usually he’s the stupidly blunt one, though Kaos has a point and actually got there before he could say something similar.

 

‘It’s true, I’m a coward. If only I could leave this place, even just in a barrel… wait, why were you guys in that barrel?’

 

‘Ship got broken, idiot drove us into a whirlpool’ Kaos answered

 

‘But you should be dead!’

 

‘Sesesese, probably but Luffy’s not going to let something like a whirlpool stop him from achieving his dream’

 

Coby turns to the straw hat boy ‘Really, what dream?’ the question causing him to light up

 

‘I’m going to be king of the pirates!’ Coby just stares, jaw hitting the floor

 

‘Pirate King’

 

‘Yep’

 

‘The Pirate King?’

 

‘Yep’

 

‘No, no way that’s impossible! You’re what 2 guys?’

 

‘Actually yes’ Kaos butts in, knowing if Luffy simply answered _yep_ once more the kid would scream

 

‘The Pirate King is the man who has everything, every pirate in the world wants that Title and the treasure of One Piece that goes with it’

 

‘Ah ha, us too’

 

‘well Luffy does, at this point I’m just along for the ride’

 

‘No, there is no way you can do this, no, no, no, no’ Coby would’ve continued but he was a little busy being punched in the face ‘Ow, why’d you do that’

 

Kaos shrugged ‘Felt like it. Plus it shut you up didn’t it?’

 

Coby frowns ‘I suppose’ the 2 pirates continue eating, seeming oblivious to the awkward silence ‘Do you think I could make my dream come true?’ he finally asks, Kaos and Luffy exchange side glances, then give very different answers

 

‘Maybe, what is it?’ ‘How the fuck should I know?’

 

‘My, my dream is to become a Marine. I’ve wanted to catch bad guys my entire life but I’ve been too much of a coward to go through with it. But no more, I’m getting off this ship, joining the marines and the first pirate I’m taking in will be Alvida’s fa…’ Coby was interrupted as the ceiling caved in, almost crushing the pink haired boy who Kaos pulled out of the way, Alvida falling through the hole she just made

 

‘Coby! Should have known you’d be here’ she grumbled hefting her mace onto her shoulder like it was an aluminium bat rather than a solid spiky bludgeoning instrument. She then looks up to Kaos and Luffy, both who have similar looks of confusion and slight curiosity on their faces, unlike Coby’s blind terror ‘I assume nether of you are Pirate Hunter Zoro?’ she asks

 

‘Nope’ Kaos answers, causing an awkward silence which just had to end badly

 

‘Hey Coby, who’s the fat lady?’ Luffy asks loudly, the woman in question turning bright red in anger, her crew’s jaws on the ground and Coby’s face turned white as a sheet. Kaos groans and face palmed

 

‘Luffy, remember when I told you about filters?’ he asked

 

‘Only that you don’t have one’ Luffy replied

 

‘Well neither do you, you don’t just say things like that to someone’s face. Now you’ve pissed her off and it’s not even true, if she can use that damn club of hers with any skill she’s got to have a good bit of muscle on her frame too’ Kaos scolds just before Luffy grabs both him and Coby and bounce them through the hole, well outside the range of Alvida’s mace

 

As the guy who pissed their (temperamental at the best of times) captain Luffy got all the attention from the pirates, allowing Kaos to quietly stand behind Coby (not that the runt could be used to hide behind or anything) and watch the younger pirate kick their collective asses, including using them as improvised bowling pins and ball. Unfortunately all that did was get them in one group, which charged as a single mob causing him to make a break from it. Luffy grabbed the mast as he turned, but instead of letting go or stopping like a normal person, his arm stretched as he ran, leaving a group of slack jawed pirates (and Coby) before he sprung back and slammed through them, the only remaining people standing being Coby, Kaos and Alvida (who had managed to climb back onto the main deck through the hole she’d made previously)

 

‘What are…’ Alvida began to ask before her eyes widen and she asks ‘Akuma no mi?’

 

Kaos grins and Luffy nods ‘Yep. I ate the Gomu Gomu no mi, I’m the rubber man!’ he announces proudly

 

Alvida hummed ‘I’d never thought I’d see one of them, before now they were just rumours, one of the many legends of the Grand Line and its mysterious terrors. You 2 bounty hunters?’

 

‘I’m a pirate, so is he, he’s my first mate but he gets bored easily and I like to hit things’ Luffy answers pointing to Kaos who simply tilts his hat forward over his eyes

 

‘So Straw Hat, if we’re both pirate captains and we don’t share a flag or a commander, I guess that makes us enemies’

 

‘Really, can’t we just be allies or rivals?’ Kaos asks causing Alvida to laugh

 

‘Oh you’re funny at the least. If you had a real ship or crew I’d consider it but you’ve got less crew than I have deck swabbers so I might as well get rid of you now rather than later’

 

‘Luffy! We need to go, now’ Coby whispers to him, getting a little annoyed when he doesn’t react ‘You’ve seen how much damage she can do with her club and of all the villains of the East Blue…’ he then stops, staring into space which confused the 3 pirates who were still listening to him.

 

‘Go on Coby, tell them, who is the most beautiful in the sea?’ Alvida encouraged with a wave of her free hand

 

‘Boa Hancock’ Kaos replies almost automatically, most of the still conscious group staring at him with sweat drops ‘Wait were you not asking the audience? Hey Luffy Shanks said it was Hancock right?’

 

The rubber boy shrugged ‘I thought he said it was Makino’

 

‘No that was prettiest in the village… also it was in order to get discounted booze’

 

Luffy face palmed ‘Oh yeah, right shishishi’ he laughed

 

‘Ahem’ Alvida coughs, a tic mark forming on her forehead ‘COBY! Answer the question!’

 

‘She’s… the ugliest thing in the sea!’ Coby yells, Kaos once more face palming as Luffy grins like a loon

 

‘ _I wonder if there will be enough left of him to bury_ ’ the purple haired man thought morbidly as Alvida began to steam

 

‘You little shit, you’re dead!’ she screams, swinging the mace a lot faster than the Straw hats expected in Coby’s direction, most likely spattering the kids head all over the deck if Luffy hadn’t stepped between them. The mace hit him head on but Luffy just smiled under his hat

 

‘That’s not going to work’ he singsonged, shoving aside her weapon to show he was completely unharmed ‘My turn’

 

**Gum Gum Pistol!**

 

His punch sent Alvida’s bulk flying, throwing her off the ship and soar out of sight with a twinkle, and then hitting the water with a barely audible splash. Kaos would feel bad for her but she was definitely not a DF user and she clearly would have no problem floating (Do all the important characters get to make fun of Alvida’s size in this chapter? I guess they do)

 

‘Anyone have a problem with us taking Coby and one of your boats?’ he asks, smiling when everyone shakes their heads ‘Good, go get it!’ he yells

 

The trio hop into the boat, Coby with a lot more screaming and flailing than the other 2, practically scaring the ever loving berri out of the orange haired girl in the boat beside them when they landed. Luffy waves cheerfully at her before heading off, all 3 wanting to be long gone before the Marines notice them.

 

‘So where’s the nearest marine base kid?’ Kaos asks with a sigh, his hat shading his eyes from the sun.

 

‘Um, I think that island over there is Shell Island, there should be one there’ Coby answers, Luffy turning the sails to send them towards the direction he pointed, hoping they could find some more crew while they were there

TBC

LW: Well time to embark on an adventure of insanity, buckle up maties!


	2. 3 swords, a muppet and an arm axe

 LW: Time for the demon swordsman to make an appearance. Anything you want to say Zoro?

Zoro: ZZZZZZZZZZZ

Coby: Um, Lonly doesn’t own anyone other than Kaos, that’s all for now.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – 3 swords, a muppet & an arm axe

 

The journey into Shell Town was surprisingly easy, especially considering the huge ass marine base on the island: either the marines at the harbour were slacking off, or more likely they took one look at the dingy Luffy and the others were sailing in and dismissed it almost immediately. Either way the end result was that 2 pirates and a pink haired scaredy cat entered their town undetected and were currently browsing in the market place.

 

‘So where do you think we’ll find Roronoa Zoro?’ Luffy asks, everyone within earshot recoiling ‘Well… that’s bad’ he mumbles

 

‘It must be just because of how dangerous this guy is, if only his name effects people like that’ Coby says with a shiver in his tone ‘But someone like him will most likely be held deep within the Marine Base. I hear the one in charge of this one is one Captain Morgan’ the locals recoil again

 

‘That can’t be good’ Kaos comments, before shrugging his shoulders in an ‘ _Ah well_ ’ sort of gesture

 

‘There must be some kind of explanation’ Coby tries to assure himself

 

‘Yeah, that Morgan’s not a nice man’ Luffy supplies seriously, then he grins and walks towards the base ‘Time to get me crewmate No. 3’ he cheers

 

Coby watches the straw hat boy walk away at a loss for words ‘What’s wrong with him?’ he finally manages to vocalise

 

‘It’s just how he is’ Kaos answers, reminding him the older pirate was still there ‘Luffy’s a cheerful guy, he doesn’t let the heavy stuff bother him most of the time. He’s the rubberman, bad things literally bounce off him. Sesese well I better go after him, make sure he hasn’t done anything to stupid yet’

 

They found him not much later, peering over the base’s wall ‘See anything you like?’ Kaos asks to get his attention

 

‘I think I found Zoro’ he answers happily

 

‘The guy on the cross? I don’t know Luffy, the guy looks grumpy but I’m not sure he’ll make much of a crewmate’ he comments as he peered over the wall himself.

 

‘I’m going to go ask him!’ Luffy announces, but before he could jump over the wall, or the others could talk him out of it a ladder was placed against it and a little girl climbed up and over, then walked over to Zoro

 

‘We need to get her out of there, or else he’ll kill her’ Coby yells, but the others grabbed him before he could follow

 

‘Even if that were true, I doubt he’s physically capable of standing right now, never mind hurting the girl’ Kaos replies with an eyeroll, just before noticing new arrivals

 

‘Oh good the marines are here’ Coby says with a smile, which immediately falls when the blond fop in front stole the girl’s riceball, spat it in her face while yelling at her, knocking the other out of her hand and stomping on it

 

‘You there, people shouldn’t be in with the prisoner, throw her over the wall’ he shrieks at one of the marines

 

‘But Helmeppo she’s just a kid’ he tried to argue only for the muppet to get in his face

 

‘Are you disobeying me? When my father, Captain Morgan, hears about this you will be severely punished. Unless You Throw That Brat Over The Wall!’ his high pitched wailing scared the marine so badly he picked up the girl and quickly tossed her over, the only conciliation being his whispered apology, and that Kaos stepped back in time to catch her.

 

‘Thanks Mister’ the girl said sweetly as Kaos put her down gently

 

‘Don’t worry about it, now come on let’s head back to the… ah fuck’ he swore when he saw Luffy had disappeared again ‘ _I wonder_ ’ he thinks, jumping up and resting his elbows on the wall and sure enough there was Luffy talking to Zoro. Letting himself drop he turned and started walking towards the village again ‘Luffy will be a while, lets find somewhere to eat, he’ll join us eventually’ Coby nods and the girl lead them to her mom’s place

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

‘ _Dickhead_ ’ Zoro thought to himself as Hellmeppo walks off, only then noticing the kid in the straw hat standing in front of him ‘What do you want?’

 

‘You’re Zoro right? Are you as strong as they say you are?’

 

‘Piss off kid’ Zoro yells, but Luffy just smiles

 

‘You know if I was in your position I’d have died after 3 days, you’ve gone nearly a month’

 

‘Yeah I have, my resolve is that strong. I will survive this and leave these walls’

 

‘Okay, bye!’

 

‘Hey wait!’ Luffy stops and turns his head ‘Toss it to me’ Zoro orders, gesturing (as well as he could) to what remained of the rice balls

 

‘You sure? They look to be mostly dirt’ Luffy asks, staring at the mess sceptically

 

‘After 3 weeks the dirt itself is starting to look appealing, just give me the damn thing!’ Zoro grumbled, Luffy nodding before scooping it all up and shoving it in the green haired man’s face ‘Oh yes. Tell that little girl, her food was amazing’

 

 

‘He really liked it?’

 

‘Yep, he said it was amazing, which considering it was at least half dirt by the time it got to him, the real thing must have been awesome’ Luffy answers with a grin

 

‘I wonder what Zoro did to be left there for 3 weeks’ Kaos wonders aloud, noticing Rika tense out the corner of his eye ‘You alright kid?’

 

‘He he he’s there because of me!’ she whimpered, telling them how Hellmeppo used to have a wolf he let terrorise the village until while passing through town Zoro killed it defending her

 

‘So to stop him punishing my mom and me Zoro agreed to be taken in and not eat or drink for an entire month…’

 

‘Which is stupid, seeing as you can’t go for more than a few days without water, the no food thing you can probably do’ Kaos sighs (I checked/googled, it’s physically possible but as the paragraph itself says, it obvious wouldn’t be a pleasant experience)

 

‘Then I guess its good it rained yesterday. Still if he can get to the end of the month he’ll be set free’

 

‘You know I have to admire his restraint, I’d have punched the dick’

 

‘Shishishi, that’s not true Kaos. I’d have punched him in the face; you’d have just stabbed him’ Luffy comments with a laugh, only then he notices the blond guy with the butt chin from before had come in, catching the tail end of his conversation/monologue

 

‘…I’m so bored, I hope Zoro’s execution tomorrow will cure this for me…’ Helmeppo froze and turned to see a boy in a straw hat and an older one in a black fedora glaring at him

 

‘Executed, but what about your deal?’ Coby asked in shock

 

Hellmeppo laughs nasally ‘I never meant to keep that, it was just a way to get him to come quietl…’ he was interrupted by a punch to the face followed to a swift knee to his balls

 

‘You can’t do this to me, when my father hears about this’ he squeaks before hobbling off

 

‘Luffy?’ Coby calls, seeing the other boy’s serious expression

 

‘It’s decided, Zoro is joining my crew’

 

_ 10 minutes later _

 

‘I’m not joining you’re crew’ Zoro answers flatly

 

‘That’s too bad, I already decided’

 

‘Damn it you stupid brat that’s not how it works’

 

‘But I want you to; I hear you’re the best swordsman in the Blue’

 

Zoro smirks ‘Oh yeah I am, but that dickhead took them from me when they tied me up here’

 

‘Hey I know, if I get you back your swords then you’ll have to join my crew!’ Luffy announces cheerfully

 

‘That’s blackmail!’ Zoro argues

 

‘Actually I think its extortion, eh not important, see you later’

 

‘You’re going the wrong way _idiot_ ’ Zoro sighs, Luffy turning on his heel before backtracking

  

‘So, you going to get those swords while Coby and I free our newest crewmate?’ Kaos asks, pulling his khopesh from somewhere

 

‘Wait! I didn’t agree to help you guys be pirates’ Coby complains/protests but gets a smack to the back of his head by Kaos

 

‘Then stay out of sight and be a lookout, just don’t get in the way’ he grunts before noticing Luffy had already disappeared again ‘ _Damn it_ Monkey’ he thought with a groan

 

Luffy ran off, realising he would have a better chance of finding Zoro’s swords if he could find the blond idiot from before, seeing as he’s the one who took them and all. Sneaking isn’t one of Luffy’s best skills but even he managed to get in and search the bottom floor with ease… mainly because nobody was there. Confused (and a little annoyed) he heard grunts and yelling coming from the roof and ran up to investigate

 

‘That’s it men, now bring it up with one big pull’ Morgan grunts through his metal jaw, Helmeppo complaining beside him

 

‘Dad why haven’t you gone to kill the guy who hit me yet?’

 

Morgan ran his hand through his hair ‘Do you know why I never hit you?’

 

‘Because I’m your son? And you think I’m great?’

 

‘No you fucking idiot, it’s because you’re weak and not worth hitting’ he then backhands him with the blunt side of his axe ‘There, feel better?’

 

‘Wow, what a dick’ everyone turns to see Luffy standing on the wall with a frown on his face ‘Hey there you are, I’m going to borrow this idiot’ he then grabs Helmeppo and runs out the door, the marines chasing after him.

 

Running around the base, (again) Hellmeppo’s head bouncing off the floor every few feet, Luffy began his search for Zoro’s sword. Eventually he decided to actually question what had until now been just dead weight

 

‘Where is Zoro’s sword?’

 

‘I’ll never tell you’ he sniffed dismissively and turned his nose up. Luffy cocks back his arm ‘Okay, okay. I’ll tell you! They’re in my room, we passed it 3 minutes ago’ he shrieks, Luffy flicks his bruised nose

 

‘You’re a weakling’ he states, just before the marines catch up with them ‘Damn it’ Luffy groans

 

**Gum gum Scapegoat**

 

He stretches his arms out, holding Hellmeppo a safe distance between himself and the marines, the muppet screaming at them not to shoot as they make their way back to his extremely girly room

 

‘Hm, 3 swords, wonder which one is Zoro’s?’ Luffy wonders, before seeing Kaos, Coby and Zoro were about to get shot ‘No time to check, guess I’ll have to bring them all’

 

**Gum gum Rocket**

 

A few minutes ago

 

‘Come on Kaos, they’ll be here any minute’ Coby panicks as Kaos tries unsuccessfully untying Zoro from his cross

 

‘Yeah, yeah, yeah either help me or shut up’ he grumbled ‘Eh fuck it, these knots are too tight’ he sighs before starting to cut through it with a small, scale patterned dagger

 

‘Go away, I’ve still got another week to go’ Zoro yelled, trying to make them leave

 

‘Actually you don’t, you’re going to be executed tomorrow’ Coby tells him, Zoro’s eyes widen in shock before he growls

 

‘That bastard!’

 

‘Listen Zoro, I’m not telling you to be a pirate, but please just let these guys save you’ just as Kaos cuts through the one binding his right arm

 

**Gum gum Rocket**

 

Luffy (carrying Zoro’s swords) drops down in front of them, perfectly fine, just as the marines opened fire. They were shocked when Luffy just stood there grinning, right before he rebounded all the bullets back at them, shattering their guns

 

‘Hey guys, I’m back’ Luffy calls, grinning as widely as before

 

‘Who are you?’ Zoro gasps

 

‘I’m Monkey D. Luffy, and I’m gonna be King Of The Pirates’ Luffy announces with a huge smile

 

‘Really? You’re going to be king of the pirates? Do you have any idea what that means’

 

‘King of the pirates means King of the pirates, what else can it means it’s right there in the name?’ Luffy asks

 

‘It sounds crazy at first but he’s actually serious about it’ Coby half defends, Kaos chuckling behind Zoro’s cross

 

‘Luffy has every intention of becoming Pirate King or to die trying, it’s going to be an interesting voyage’ she says, adding his 2 cents.

 

‘Any way, I got your sword back Zoro, but which one is it?’ Luffy asks, waving them in the older man’s face

 

‘All of them, I use Santoryu, 3 sword style’ Zoro answers with pride, while Luffy looks in awe

 

‘That sounds so cool!’ he cheers, Kaos chuckling while Coby looks on in confusion (As I did the first time I heard of 3 swords style) ‘Hey you almost done over there?’

 

‘Nearly Monkey, just a little more’ Kaos grumbles at the strong ropes they used to bind Zoro

 

_ Meanwhile with the marines _

 

‘What is he?’

‘The bullets just bounced off him’

 

‘That kid must have eaten one of those Devil Fruits we’ve heard about, fruits that grant the ones who eat them otherworldly abilities. There are many types in this world but almost nothing is known about them, though it’s believed their secrets are somewhere on the Grand Line’ Morgan answers, his men getting more and more worried

 

‘ _And that’s exactly where I’m heading_ ’ Kaos thinks with his signature smirk

 

‘But it doesn’t matter what he can do, if the guns don’t work then cut him down!’ Morgan orders, the marines rushing at the group with their swords

 

‘Hurry up!’ Coby yells fearfully

 

‘Almost, GOT IT!’

 

‘Give me my swords!’

 

 **YAAAAAAAAH……………** _thunk_

 

The marine’s blades were all stopped by Zoro’s 3 swords, it clear despite the time spent starving himself he hadn’t lost any of his strength

 

‘So that’s how you use 3 sword style’ Kaos grins in amusement, Luffy smiling like a loon as usual, while Coby tries to get his heart back to a normal rhythm.

 

‘Now I’m a criminal for defying and fighting the marines I’ll join you loons. But know this; I’m going to achieve my dream of being the greatest swordsman, you do anything to make me deviate from that path I will cut you down’

 

‘How about we just beat some sense into you until you’re back on the right track again?’ Kaos gives as a counter offer, causing the green haired swordsman to grin around the hilt

 

‘Works for me, but I won’t go down easy even then. So what are your orders, captain?’

 

‘Luffy’s eyes harden ‘Duck’ he says lowly, Zoro raising his eyebrows until Luffy lifts his foot at which point he complies

 

**Gum gum whip**

 

Luffy’s rubber leg tossed the marines aside like rag dolls, freeing Zoro and flinging them back at a steaming Morgan

 

‘Incompetence! I’ll deal with you myself’ Morgan yells arrogantly

 

Luffy ran full pelt at the Captain, his rubberised punch blocked by Morgan’s Axe hand, which he dodged a swing from. Not letting the fissure it caused distract him, the straw hat jumped into the air and planted both feet on Morgan’s face, bringing him to the ground. He then proceeded to whale on him, repeatedly using stretched punches to do more damage while not going to the point of using the named techniques

 

‘Straw Hat!’ Helmeppo screamed, Luffy catching him out the corner of his eye ‘Stand down, I have a hostage! If you don’t want your friend to die you’ll surrender right now’ he threatens, but the gun to Coby’s head wriggled in his shaking hand.

 

‘Well, well, the idiot has some skills after all’ Kaos smirks mirthlessly, spinning his blade between his fingers as Luffy drops Morgan and starts walking

 

_If I die fighting for my dream it’s all worth it_

_Luffy’s not going to let something like a whirlpool stop him from achieving his dream_

 

‘Luffy!’ Coby yells ‘Don’t worry about me; if I die it’ll be okay’

 

‘I know, but you won’t’ Luffy says, inching closer towards them, unaware Morgan was pulling himself to his feet

 

**Gum gum pistol**

 

‘You brat, I am the greatest!’ Morgan yells, swinging his axe down on Luffy’s head only for it to be caught by a reflective, silver hand grabbing his forearm

 

‘Don’t touch my little brother asshat’ Kaos hissed, his smile gone just before punching Morgan in the jaw with another oddly coated fist. On top of the beat down Luffy had already given him, the punch ensured Morgan wasn’t getting up again anytime soon. Together (because he took one more step and nearly collapsed) they brought Zoro back to the little girl and her mom, to feed the swordsman.

 

_ Later _

 

‘Ahh, food has never tasted so good’ Zoro groans as he ate his fill, Coby and Kaos already done while Luffy continued to stuff his face

 

‘So Coby, you guys going to sign up now?’ Kaos asked, surprised when the pinkette visibly deflated

 

‘Yeah I know you guys didn’t like me around and I was just a loser and a burden…’ he stops when he feels hands clamp down on his shoulders

 

‘Idiot! You’re not a burden, you’re a good kid and you are brave, you stood up to Helmeppo and Morgan, you’ll make a great Marine one day’ Kaos say honestly… before flicking him in the forehead

 

‘You better try rise through the ranks quickly Coby, the King of the Pirates should only be caught by the best’ Luffy grins and Coby tears up in happiness

 

‘Excuse me’ the group turn to a man in a marine uniform ‘I couldn’t help but overhear, you guys are pirates?’

 

Luffy nods ‘Yep, me, Zoro and Kaos’ he points to each in turn

 

‘Okay. Now we are happy you stopped Morgan, but now we know you’re pirates we need to ask you to leave. Though in light of your recent actions we won’t inform Navy headquarters’ the villagers yelled angrily but the pirates just stood and turned to leave

 

‘That’s fine, we’re not heroes, we’re pirates. We were just passing through and took out Morgan for being a major dickhead. Goodbye guys’

 

Ripper then turns to Coby ‘And you are you with them?’

 

‘Does kidnapping count?’ Kaos asks _innocently_ , all the colour draining from his face

 

‘What?’

 

Luffy grinned widely ‘You see 2 years ago this guy…’

 

‘Shut up!’ Coby yells, punching Luffy in the face, realising a second too late how much he’d screwed up when he was lifted and thrown through the window. Kaos began to step towards him when he was stopped by 2 sword wielding marines, as Ripper sent 2 others to pick up Coby

 

‘Well it’s clear you people aren’t friends by any means, so get lost pirates! What were you doing here anyway kid?’

 

Coby was frozen as he looked over at the others; Luffy was unharmed and grinning, while Kaos was always smirking but it looked warm and peaceful. ‘They did it on purpose, give me my best chance’ Coby thought, doing his very best not to cry ‘My name is Coby and I wish to join the Marines, Sir!’

 

TBC

 

LW: Well that’s the end of Zoro’s intro chapter, everyone still happy to read this? I’ll try to add a chapter between every week and every 2 weeks (just getting in on that deadline tonight)

 

 ** _Reviews will be answered and new abilities_** (minus the simpler of canon ones) **_will be explained down here in all future chapters_**

Actually in hind sight some people like a friend of mine aren’t that familiar with One Piece in detail, just the series as an overall thing, so I’ll just start explaining things from this point on at the first instance of any of the main characters attacks/moves/skills.

**_ Techniques/Devil Fruit abilities _ **

 

**_Luffy_ **

**_Eaten the Gomu Gomu no mi/Gum Gum Fruit._** Basically his body has turned to rubber and he’s supper stretchy

Gum Gum Pistol: Stretching his arm back several feet then swings it back as he punches his opponent.

Gum Gum Whip: Stretching his leg as he performs a wide kick, knocking back anything within range

Gum Gum Scapegoat: Not the same as the anime, mostly because he holds onto the person her grabs and uses them as a human shield as apposed to throwing them at the opponent (I have till Marineford to rename THAT technique, I’m thinking Gum Gum Substitute… eh it’ll be a few years at this rate)

Gum Gum Rocket: He grabs something sturdy (the window in the case of this episode, but anything he can use as a hand hold), walks back and then bounces out like a rubber band that’s been let go. Luffy’s primary form of speedy transport (such as going from the roof to the ground)

 

**_Zoro_ **

Santoryu: A form of sword fighting involving 3 swords (Hence the obvious other name of 3 sword style), one in each hand and the 3rd clenched between the fighter’s teeth. Zoro is proficient in this style, it being is signature and all, but he is also capable of using Nitoryu (2 sword style, or dual wielding to some of us) as well as Ittoryu (1 sword style, or swinging a sword around like a normal person) just nowhere near as good as his 3 sword style.

 


	3. The circus is in town

LW: Well here we are, chapter 3. Nami, you want to do the intro?

Nami: Sure, that’ll be 10,000 beri.

LW: (Sweatdrop) I’ll just start the chapter

Nami: (Grumbling) Cheap bastard

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – The Circus is in Town

 

We find our heroes (?) sailing in a random direction due to their captains terrible navigation skills and the 2 19 year olds were currently trying to ignore the youngest’s loud complaining about being hungry, something they’d feel more sympathy for if he hadn’t eaten most of the food himself.

 

**Tap, tap, tap, tap. Tap, tap, tap. tap.**

 

‘Zoro opens his eye, looking over to Kaos as he taps his blade against his thigh

 

‘You know, that’s quite a unique looking thing, so I’m guessing it’s not just some nameless scrap. Want to share?’ he asked, he may not know all the high grade swords but still it was worth a shot

 

Kaos chuckles ‘It has a name; I just rarely give it out. I’ll tell you what it means though: Eye of the Serpent Demon’

 

Zoro snorts ‘Damn flowery forgers, can’t they give things simple names?’

 

‘And what does your sword’s name mean?’ Kaos asks, pointing to his white katana

 

Zoro sighs ‘ ** _Wado Ichimonji_** , Straight Road of the Harmony’

 

Kaos grins ‘You were saying?’

 

‘Hey look a bird, that means land, which means food’ Luffy cheers, bending his legs before either of the 2 could stop him

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

As Zoro and Kaos fight to keep the boat the right way up, Luffy catapulted himself up to the bird

 

‘I got it… nope it’s got me’

 

‘Luffy! Damn it you idiot’

 

‘I’ll row, you make sure we don’t lose the moron’ Zoro orders, Kaos nods and moves to the front, not taking his eyes off Luffy, his hands itched, wanting to shoot the bird down but knew they wouldn’t get to him in time to stop him hitting the water.

 

Most likely because due to the mildness of the East Blue they were able to keep up with the bird, or at least it hadn’t gotten much further away and was still within sight. They might have even been able to follow them back to land, were it not for 3 loud distraction

 

‘Help’

‘Save us’

‘We’re drowning!’

 

Both guys looked down to see 3 people dressed in carnie gear and clown makeup, flailing around, begging for assistance. Kaos sighs

 

‘Get in the boat, we’re not stopping!’ he yells, Zoro taking the hint and kept rowing as the 3 guys scramble into the boat without being hit by it

 

‘Oy, you could have killed us!’ One with a painted frown yelled

 

‘That’s nice now excuse me I need to find our captain’ Kaos waved his hand dismissively, not even turning when they drew their weapons

 

‘Don’t ignore us! We’re Buggy pirates and we’re taking over this vessel’

 

Kaos raises an eyebrow before turning, his eyes shine for a moment, then with a lazy swing of his khopesh slices through their cutlasses.

 

‘Be quiet. Ah crap’ he swears, the bird no longer in sight ‘You idiots lost us our captain. Where’s land?’ he asks angrily

 

‘Why should we tell you?’

 

‘1: You most likely also want to reach land, 2: I won’t start cutting you’ he threatens, but Buggy doesn’t recruit people for their brains so even after the previous display they weren’t intimidated (Brave or stupid, take your pick)

 

Zoro sighs and stops rowing ‘Give me a minute’ he says as he stands up

 

_ 2 minutes later _

 

Now sporting several bumps, bruises and black eyes, the pirates frantically rowing towards Orange Town

 

‘We’re sorry to have disrespected the mighty Pirate Hunter Zoro’ the centre one apologised, a light, fearful smile on his face

 

‘That’s nice. What do you know about pink birds? Do they fly over the village?’ Kaos asks, now lying down staring up into the cloudless sky

 

‘Sometimes, Captain Buggy has us fire on them if they get too close to the Big Top, but other than that we leave ‘em alone’

 

‘And this Captain Buggy, anything worth knowing?’

 

The crew swallow ‘He’s a monster of a man, ruthless and sadistic in his manners, plus with his Devil Fruit Power he’s practically unstoppable. If you go up against him you’re de…AHHH!’ the centre pirate screams before he looks down at his leg, forgoing his blade Kaos simply stabbed his hand THROUGH his leg, nearly tearing it in half

 

‘He’s not the only one’ he says in a surprisingly neutral tone’

 

 

_ Meanwhile thousands of…. Meanwhile in Orange Town _

 

 

‘Hey get back here!’

‘Give us the map girlie and we won’t have to hurt you’

‘That map’s ours, we stole it first!’

 

‘ _Shit, shit, shit, shit_ ’ Nami swore internally as the burley circus rejects chased her through the village. The 3 pirates nearly catching up when they all heard yelling, stopping just as something fell from the sky with a loud crash, forming a crater and a dust cloud. Despite it being a perfect distraction Nami’s curiosity made her stay, so when the dust cleared she saw a familiar straw hated boy standing between her and the Buggy pirates, when he turns they both think the same thing

 

_‘You again?’_

 

Thinking fast Nami puts a plan into action ‘Hey Boss, glad you could make it, I just got the map like you asked. Mind taking care of the goons for me? That’d be great’ she says with a wide grin before running off, finding a high vantage point with which to hide (as nobody looks up EVER)

 

‘The girl got away’

‘Well did you hear her, this guys’ her boss, he must have something good’

‘Yeah, lets take his stuff, find the girl again and bring all their loot back to Buggy’

 

The 3 pirates charge at him but Luffy destroys them, 2 with elasticated punches and the 3rd kicked into a wall

 

‘I’m hungry’ he mutters to himself, not at all effected by 3 people trying to kill him

 

‘Wow I thought they’d kick your ass but you took them down easy’ Nami comments from the rooftop

 

‘Hey you’re the girl who set me up, who are you?’

 

‘Nami. I’m a pirate thief, wanna team up?’ she asks with a smile (Stealing is wrong…unless it’s from pirates)

 

Luffy looks blanky at the girl ‘Um thanks but no thanks lady’ he then turns and walks away, Nami hopping down and running after him

 

‘Hey wait a minute’ Nami yells, catching up to him mostly because he stopped walking

 

Luffy slumps to the ground ‘I’m still hungry’ he moans

 

‘I could make you something’ Nami offers, causing Luffy to spring up excitedly ‘What’s wrong with this guy?’ she thinks

 

‘Really? Thanks’ he grins widely

 

 

_ Later _

 

‘I kind of thought you’d be something more interesting than a petty thief’ Luffy complains, getting a slight tap on the head ‘Ow’

 

‘I’m not just a petty thief, I’m a Cat Burgler, swiping from the shadows without anyone the wiser’

 

Luffy shrugs ‘A thief is a thief in my eyes, you steal shit from people, what’s the difference?’

 

‘Plenty! Though I wouldn’t expect a pirate to understand finesse or subtlety’ Nami argues, turning her nose up until she realises Luffy is laughing at her ‘What’s so funny?’

 

‘Shishishi. 2 things: One; you get very angry when people generalise thieves, but are more than happy to generalise pirates as big ugly brutes. Two; by your own definition you’re more a thief than a cat burglar, being caught by both the Buggy pirates and me’ he grins widely until she punches him again

 

‘So Navigator, will you be able to take us through the Grand Line one you have the map?’ he asks

 

‘Hey, I didn’t agree to anything!’ Nami yells

 

‘ ** _Hey Boss, glad you could make it, I just got the map like you asked. Mind taking care of the goons for me? That’d be great_** ’ Luffy imitates ‘that’s a formal agreement amongst criminals like us, after all in our line of work our word is our bond’

 

‘Like pirates know honour’ Nami scoffs

 

‘About as much as a thief’

 

‘Blatant stereotyping!’

 

‘World Government propaganda’ Luffy argues back

 

‘I will never be a pirate, those people sicken me. The only thing I hate more than pirates are marines’ Nami yells before turning away in a huff

 

‘Jeez, what’s got your panties in a bunch?’ Luffy mumbles, not actually directing the question at Nami as he resumed stuffing his face and filling his belly

 

Nami spots some of the Buggy pirates just outside the house they were hiding in, figures with how valuable the map was they wouldn’t just let her go, she needed a plan. Turning back to the oblivious Straw hat with a greedy smirk

 

‘Okay Luffy, I’ll join your crew, but just for now and I’ll need you to help me with something. You up for some method acting?’ she asks then before he could react he’s secured quite tightly with ropes

 

‘Um Nami, why did you have all this rope?’ Luffy asked, Nami flushes and blusters a garbled mess of sounds ‘Don’t worry, I don’t judge’ he smiles, only getting punched in the head once more

 

‘Just shut up and act like a prisoner’

 

_ The Big Top _

 

‘You mean to tell me that not only did you lose the map, but you let the girl escape!’ a blue haired man in clown aesthetic, red nose included yelled. This was Buggy the Clown, Captain of the Buggy Pirates, and currently getting madder by the minute ‘Time to die!’

 

‘Please don’t kill us Captain Buggy!’ the pirates plead as they beg for their lives

 

 

‘Fear not Captain Buggy, I caught the thief!’ Nami announces as she leads a bound Luffy through the group, breaking the mood and luckily snapping Buggy out of his murderous rage

 

‘Well this is quite a surprise, what has led to this change of heart Missie?’ Buggy asks in slight amusement as Nami returns the map to him

 

‘I was arguing with my boss **_again_** , I realised I needed to change things up, so here I am’ she waves her hands dramtically ‘I was hoping I might be able to join you guys’

 

Buggy starts to twitch, getting several of his crew mates worried he was going to snap… until he started laughing manically

 

‘You want to change things up? Join a new crew? Well of course little miss, you seem like quite a bit of fun indeed’ he announces, he crew cheering, some just in relief.

 

Nami grinned at Buggy’s gullibility when she was conked on the head and collided face first into the ground ‘ _Ow_ ’

 

‘Oh Luffy, what mess have you gotten yourself into this time?’ Nami turns her head and sees a purple haired man talking to Luffy

 

‘Hey Kaos, little tied up at the moment’ Luffy grins

 

‘I can see that. It’s one thing after another with you Monkey’ he sighs then his eyes catch the demented clown ‘Captain Buggy I presume?’

 

Buggy puffs up like a peacock ‘Why of course I am, it’s wonderful how tales of my greatness reach the far reaches of the Ea…’ he then noticed Kaos wasn’t paying him the slightest bit of attention ‘Hey! Don’t ignore me!’ he yells

 

‘Oh Luffy what am I to do with you? Maybe it’s best if I just cut my losses’ he sighs and reaches into his cloak

 

Luffy flails around on the ground ‘No! We’re supposed to explore the Grand Line together, go on an amazing adventure as brothers’

 

Kaos laughs ‘In case you haven’t figured it out the Grand Line is Hell on Earth, our brotherly army of 2 isn’t going to cut it. Probably better I end this before it gets us both killed’ he pulls out a gun

 

‘Wait! You can’t do this’

 

Kaos blinks ‘You’re right’ he removes Shank’s hat from Luffy’s head ‘Can’t let this get damaged and red hair wouldn’t want it back with a bullet hole or covered in your blood’

 

‘Stop!’ both pirates look at Buggy in surprise ‘A captain shouldn’t die in such an un-flashy way. Men, bring out the Buggy Ball!’ he orders, Kaos and Luffy look at one another and shrug

 

The cannon was loaded and fired, to which Kaos had no other response available but to whistle ‘Damn! Okay Captain, you’ve officially impressed me’

 

‘That’s all well and good but you still haven’t given me a reason to let you join a crew as flashy as mine’

 

Kaos grins ‘Well how about the guy who ate the Senko Senko no mi? I’m the flashiest man alive. Sure it was only a few weeks since I did so, so I’ve not fully worked out its capabilities yet but I do have this…’

 

**Flashbang!**

 

He splays his fingers in an explosion mime and everyone was blinded by a bright flash of light, the only exception being a grinning Luffy who knew what his brother was about to do so closed his eyes and tilted his head down

 

‘…and I move and react quicker than I used to, which is probably why my fruit is considered the little sister of the Pika Pika no mi, that and I can’t shoot lasers from my fingers, as far as I know’

 

Buggy laughs ‘Well that definitely is what I’d call flashy. Welcome to the crew kid’ his smile then turned into a feral grin ‘You just need to pass your initiation

 

_ 10 minutes later _

 

‘Hey, why am I in a cage?’ Luffy asks

 

Kaos shrugs ‘Beats me, if you hadn’t escaped by now you weren’t going to’

 

‘The Buggy Ball is reloaded Captain’

 

‘Excellent, now Kaos light the fuse and the Buggy Ball will blow your former captain away flashily’

 

Kaos and Luffy stared at each other, then the younger smiled and nodded so he lit the fuse

 

 _‘He’s going to vaporise his own brother, and I didn’t think pirates could sink any lower’_ Nami thinks angrily, wishing she was anywhere but beside the cannon, but Buggy wanted her in line of sight

 

 

 

All was fine, right up until Buggy pirates started getting tossed around as a green haired man made his way to the cannon, Kaos and Nami.

 

‘ZORO!’ Luffy cheers/yells happily

 

‘I really didn’t think I’d be returning the favour of saving your ass quite so soon Luffy’ Zoro replies neutrally

 

Kaos sighs of relief ‘Zoro, I was beginning to think you were never going to show up’ with a swing of his blade he cut through the fuse in 2, the end burning on the ground feebly.

 

 

‘Pirate Hunter Zoro, here for my head I presume?’ Buggy asks

 

‘Nah, I’m not in that business any more, just looking for my crew. First this idiot gets caught by a bird, then this one just straight up disappears’

 

‘That may be true, but killing the legendary Zoro would do wonders for my reputation, make my goals that much easier to achieve’

 

Zoro tilts his head ‘You can try, but you won’t last for very much longer if you do’

 

Buggy cackles ‘Is that so, let’s find out’

 

Both men get into their battle stance, Zoro moving Wado into his mouth, as Buggy pulls several knives from his coat. The clown pirate then runs at the swordsman who stands his ground and locks his position

 

‘Die Flashily!’ Buggy yells, leaping at Zoro, the green haired swordsman not reacting to the clown as he splits him in 4; removing his right hand and left foot, as well as splitting him in half at the waist, the pieces falling to the ground with a plop

 

‘Well that was boring’ Zoro complains

 

‘Ah damn it, I wanted to see what his Devil fruit powers were’ Kaos sighs ‘Well guess I’ll have to wait for one of these chuckleheads to eat it again’ he mutters, only then hearing the steadily increasing volume of laughter ‘Did I over think again and miss a joke or something?’

 

‘Their captain is dead and they’re laughing’ Nami repeats in confusion

 

‘I don’t like this, something doesn’t feel ri-gurk’ Zoro grunts, falling to his knees. Looking down he was shocked to see Buggy’s knife sticking out of his gut, the clown had stabbed him in the back. And that was just the start as Buggy’s separate parts floated up and stuck themselves back together as thought Zoro hadn’t done anything

 

‘It seems someone told you I had a Devil Fruit, unfortunately for you they weren’t stupid enough to tell you it’s name. I ate the Bara Bara no mi, now I’m a split human so I can’t be harmed by a sword. Bwahahahahaha!’

 

‘He’s a split human, that’s weird’ Luffy thinks aloud, Kaos groans in annoyance

 

‘That may not have been a lethal hit, but you’re not exactly going to be walking away with an injury like that. So it appears that I am victorious’ Buggy cheers, his crew joining them

 

 _‘Blades are out, but what about a more blunt force approach?’_ Kaos wonders, his weapon idling spinning in his hand

 

‘Let my guard down, damn Devil Fruit users’ Zoro growls through the pain of his wound.

 

 

‘A knife in the back’s a dirty trick, you Big Nose!’ Luffy yells angrilly

 

Everyone gapped, except Nami who was reminded when boot meets arse, face meets floor.

 

‘Hey what the fuck was that for?’ she yells

 

‘Couldn’t reach Luffy’ Kaos answers unapologetically, shrugging his shoulders slightly.

 

‘What did you say? Die you flashy bastard!’ Buggy yells, throwing his knife at Luffy, but the rubber boy catches it in his teeth

 

‘Hey Buggy’ Luffy garbles around the knife ‘When I get out of this cage I’m going to kick your ass’ he then bites down, breaking the knife.

 

Buggy laughs ‘As if, no instead all 4 of you will die, right now in fact, by my hands. So if you plan to kick my ass you should probably do it now’

 

‘No, I refuse to die!’

 

Getting Zoro’s attention he points to the cannon, then Buggy, Zoro smiling despite the pain ‘You’re as crazy as Luffy, but it should work’

 

Buffy leaps at Zoro who manages to keep him at bay with his 3 swords, though he knows he can’t actually injure the clown he can at least stop him doing any more damage. With a nod from Luffy Zoro cleave Buggy in half once more.

 

‘You idiot, that 3 sword style may look impressive but it’s no match for the Bara bara no mi, just give up and I’ll make your death… hey where’d you go?’ Buggy yells angrily when he see’s Zoro has disappeared, right until he turns around

 

Kaos runs while Zoro shambles over to the cannon, both gripping the underside and with a colossal heave managed to flip it.

 

‘They tipped the cannon’

‘Why’d they do that?’

 

Buggy freezes, then flails wildly ‘There’s still a Buggy Ball in the cannon!’ he yells just as a smirking Kaos pulls out a lighter and sets off the now much shorter fuse

 

**KABOOOOOOOOOOOM!**

 

TBC

 

Yay, first cliffhanger I think… oh well.

 

**_ Character information _ **

 

Buggy the Clown

 **Eaten the Bara Bara no mi/Chop Chop fruit** : Enables his body to split apart and can’t be harmed by sharp force trauma (swords, knives etc), the body splitting harmlessly where it would be damaged and being able to easily reattach itself once the blade leaves his body

 

Zoro

 **Wado Ichimonji** : O wanzmono grade sword with a white hilt, circular guard and is a straight blade. The blade usually held in his mouth

 

Kaos

Eaten the * * no mi/ * * fruit. Yeah you’re going to have to wait for that one, also yes he was screwing around with Buggy when he said he ate the Flash Flash fruit given the pirates obsession with things being flashy.

 **Dazzle** : The real name of the techniques Kaos referred to as **Flashbang** (which was its original name, until I had a better use for that name. Helped it had a secondary move known as moon dazzle, so the name change was easy)

 

Thought now was as good a time as any to tell you my thoughts on Special Paramecia class of Devil Fruits. Anyone who isn’t up to date with the manga will not understand, but in the current arc there’s a Devil Fruit User (Charlotte ‘Dogtooth’ Katakuri) who was originally a logia, then reclassed as paramecia, more specifically special paramecia.

Due to what the only character in this class can do I’m stating that Special paramecia are a middle ground between paramecia and logia, having a mix of characteristics from both, taking on the qualities or producing a substance but having freeform control over said material, like he does with his mochi. That’s all, just wanted to give my opinion on the subject while Oda still hasn’t explained anything yet.


	4. Clown, Lions, Unicycles oh my!

LW: Well here we go, 2nd half of the Buggy arc

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Clowns, Lions & Unicycles oh my!

 

While the smoke clears, Zoro and Kaos (with some difficulty, and having to quite literally kick Nami out of the way) lugged Luffy’s cage away, Nami following her them in confusion and a hint of curiosity.

 

They stopped outside a pet shop, Zoro collapsing from blood loss / dizziness, while Kaos leaned against the cage tiredly as the cage was fucking heavy.

 

‘Doggie! Hey guys do you think he’s dead?’ Luffy asks before poking it, not that any of the 3 telling him not to would have stopped him. The dog reacts quickly, attempting to ravage Luffy’s rubber face, Zoro sighs in annoyance while Kaos is laughing his ass off.

 

‘ _These people are fucking idiots!_ ’ Nami thinks/complains mentally before walking over to them ‘Hey I think you need this more than I do’ she says, tossing a key in Luffy’s direction

 

‘Awesome the key to the cage. Thanks Navigator!’ Luffy says happily

 

‘Why didn’t you tell us you had the key before we lugged the cage all the way here?’ Zoro complained, not that it mattered as the moment the key hit the ground in front of Luffy, the dog immediately gobbled it up as everyone watches in shock. Luffy was the first to break out, wrapping his hands around the dogs neck and shakes it, trying to get it to cough up the key

 

‘Hey, stop hurting Shu Shu’ some old guy yelled, stopping Luffy from throttling the dog, even if just out of confusion

 

 

‘Who are you old man?’ Zoro grunts with a twinge

 

‘Old Man? I’m Mayor Boodle’ the old man yells until he notices the deep wound on Zoro’s torso ‘Damn that looks bad, I guess you’ve run into Buggy and his goons. You need a doctor’

 

‘Thanks, know any?’ Kaos asks with a shrug while Luffy mutters death threats in Shu Shu’s direction.

 

_ Transition _

 

 

Boodle exits the house and walks back to where Luffy, Nami and Kaos were sitting, Shu Shu sitting on Kao’s feet, the elder pirate not appearing to have any problems with it

 

‘So is Zoro going to be okay?’ Luffy asks, worried about his newest crewmate

 

Boodle sighs ‘I told him he needs to see a Doctor, but he says he just wants to sleep it off. I suppose it doesn’t matter though given the doc left with the other villagers when Buggy showed up and started ransacking the town’

 

So, Shu shu huh?’ Kaos asks, rubbing behind the dog’s ears

 

‘Why’s he just sitting out here, seems like quite a lazy mutt’ Luffy comments though without any real bite to his words, which was probably why Kaos didn’t hit him, Mayor Boodle didn’t yell at him and Shu Shu didn’t try eat his face again.

 

‘He’s guarding the store’

 

Nami raises an eyebrow ‘The store? Why?’

 

After filling his dog bowl, Boodle goes on to explain how the store used to belong to a friend of his, Shu Shu’s owner and how it had been very special to both of them. He died a couple months back and this was all Shu Shu had of his master, plus the store was technically his as much as the man’s. Despite many attempts to get him to leave, even just so he wasn’t always out in the cold all the time Shu Shu always returned to his vigil outside the store, some of the villagers thought he was waiting for his master to return but Boodle told them he was sure Shu shu knew his master was dead, and that the store was now his to protect, alone. There was a moment of quiet contemplation… until Shu Shu’s feed bowl started to rattle against the stone, slight tremors coming from the distance.

 

‘Beast Tamer Monji, everybody run!’ the mayor yells, running off, Nami and Kaos chasing after him, the latter yelling ‘Hey get back here!’ as the old man hadn’t given them any information other than telling them to run

 

‘Um guys?’ Luffy calls, leaving just him and the dog outside the store.

 

Thuds like thunder rumbled through them as a large lion plodded into view, the man on top making Luffy laugh

 

‘You’re head looks funny’ he chuckles

 

Monji scowls ‘This is manly hair. It seems you need to learn respect, behold there is no beast on this earth I cannot tame’ he hops of his lion and walks up to Shu Shu ‘Shake’

 

Luffy may have been annoyed at the time but he now understood why Kaos laughed at him, watching Monji spazz out trying to get Shu shu off his arm was pretty hilarious, he guessed like all slapstick it was funnier mostly because the dog’s jaws weren’t clamped around his face this time

 

‘Never mind, I don’t care about an idiot like you so tell me where Roronoa Zoro is and I’ll let you live’

 

‘Nope’

 

Monji growled ‘Fine have it your way. Get him Ritchie!’ the lion tries to attack Luffy but only destroys the cage, freeing the straw hat who jumps to safety…. Well he would have had Ritchie not swiped at him with his paw, throwing the kid through one of the nearby houses.

 

 

_ Later _

 

Kaos returns, annoyed he didn’t get anything else out of the old man and worried Luffy had managed to do something stupid again despite being locked in a metal cage, but upon reaching the spot they’d left him his only thoughts were ‘ _Ah fuck_ ’. He looks from the burning Pet Store to the dog that looked like he got the ever loving shit kicked out of him, howling fruitlessly as his treasure was slowly reduced to ash and cinders. Sighing sadly before placing his hat on Shu Shu’s head

 

‘Keep that safe for me bud, I’ve got a clown to tenderize’ he turns to leave but is stopped by a hand on his shoulder ‘You can’t stop me Luffy’ he says without a hind of his usual cheerful undertones

 

‘I know and I don’t want to. That guy destroyed the doggie’s treasure, but I’m taking that weirdo out, you take the lion’ Kaos raises an eyebrow ‘You’ll kill the guy otherwise, at least you’ll spare…. Um Ritchie I think he was called’ Kaos shrugs but nodded to his Captain, he was in charge after all.

 

_ A little while later _

 

‘Little shit bit me’ Monji complains mostly to himself as he rides Ritchie on his search for Zoro, the lion munching his way through a bag of pet food when it stopped suddenly ‘What now Ritchie?’ he asks before looking down

 

Standing in front of them was a tall man with short purple hair, staring at him with intense green eyes

 

‘Oy what are you doing standing there? Move it!’

 

‘Get off’ Monji blinked, this guy didn’t react and instead gave him an order

 

‘What?’

 

‘Get off the lion’ he elaborated

 

‘Now see here…’ Monji began, but he was apparently out of chances

 

‘Get off the fucking lion! I’m not allowed kill you, but by Kami I will accept whatever discipline the captain decides I deserve for disobeying if you don’t come down here right now!’ Kaos yelled up at the ‘Beast Tamer’, the man pretty sure he peed himself a little after he slid down Ritchie’s side ‘Thank you’ Kaos smiles sweetly which confused him

 

‘What now?’

 

‘This’ Kaos grins as he raises his fist, coated in a reflective silver coloured substance, then pulls his arm back and punches the lion in the side of his head, causing it to slam through a house.

 

‘Ritchie! Why’d you do that you bastard?’ the beast tamer asks angrily

 

‘Because you hurt Shu Shu’ Kaos answers

 

‘And this is for destroying the doggie’s treasure’ a voice from behind Monji said, he turned and saw the straw hat kid from earlier

 

‘So you survived, I didn’t expect that’

 

‘Yeah, I seem to do that. But now you get to learn to respect other people’s treasures’ Luffy says, stretching back both arms, then while Monji is frozen in shock sends 2 simultaneous punches to his face, sending him into a wall

 

**Gum Gum Shotgun**

 

 

 

_ Back with Shu Shu _

 

Nami stands in shock as Shu Shu sits just outside the pile of rubble that was once his home and treasure, her anger boiling deep inside her, unfortunately finding a (she believed) suitable target when Kaos and Luffy return

 

‘Well, back to see all the destruction you’ve brought? I thought you’d both died and I wish you had, 2 less pirates ruining everyone’s lives’ Nami yells at them, but both seem to ignore her, something which just pissed her off more causing her to lash out had the mayor not held her back

 

‘Hey Shu Shu, thanks for minding my hat for me, the big cat won’t hurt you ever again’ Kaos says as he puts back on his fedora and scratches Shu Shu behind his ears, the dog barking contently as Luffy places a box of pet food in front of him

 

‘Here you go doggie, sorry this was all we could save, that mean lion ate all the rest’

 

Neither Nami or the mayor knew how to react to this, that was where they went? That was why they went up against the Beast Tamer and his lion?

 

‘They took on that guy, because he hurt the dog? What kind of pirates are they?’ Nami wonders as Kaos stands back up

 

‘Miss Nami, your services are no longer required’ he says evenly, Nami scoffs

 

‘Yeah right I heard Luffy, you guys are desperate for a Navigator, and I’m the best there is…’

 

‘All which we can find in the next town and preferably one with a personality dissimilar to sandpaper’ Nami appeared stuck between paralysing frustration and violent rage, if the painful eye twitches and clenching fists were any indication ‘We’ll also be taking the map and half the treasure…’

 

‘No Way!’ Nami explodes ‘I worked my ass off getting that map…’

 

Kaos smiles with teeth ‘And then you gave it back, like an idiot. So when we kick the crap out of Buggy and steal it back it’ll be our efforts that got us the map. And before you say you need it, why? You clearly are a one woman theft ring, the fact you need our help proves it, and the Grand Line destroys whole crews of pirates and marines on occasion, with tons more experience than you, so if you went there on your own you’re committing suicide, in which case you don’t need the map’

 

‘Enough’ Luffy says loudly ‘I don’t like seeing my nakama fighting. Though I will admit Nami that Kaos is right: you can either join my crew or sail to the next island of suckers to fleece. The choice is yours’

 

Nami grimaced but knew she had a better chance of accomplishing her goals with them than without, especially if they aren’t actually as dim as they first acted ‘Fine, I’ll agree to a temporary partnership, until I reach my 100,000,000 beri target’

 

Kaos huffs ‘I’ll write up a contract when we get back to the boat’ he sighs before going to check on Zoro

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

‘I can’t believe you lost, even if it was to Zoro!’

 

‘N-n-no Captain Buggy it wasn’t Zoro it was the tall one and the straw hat kid. They’re not like the others, they have…’ Monji faints before he could finish

 

Buggy sneers ‘Well that was disappointing. Men! Load another Buggy-Ball, we’re taking out these bastards if we have to vaporise the entire village’ he yells

 

**BOOM**

 

‘Zoro! Kaos!’ Luffy and Nami yell as the house is obliterated

 

‘We’re here’ they heard the swordsman say, much weaker than he usually sounded ‘Well that as a shitty way to wake up’ he complains

 

‘How’d you survive?’ the mayor asks

 

‘Dumb luck really, you put Zoro in a room with 2 windows, in the corner of the house. I saw the wave of destruction and pulled mosshead out the other. I’m sure going through the window as well as the tumble after gave us some more bruises, but better than the alternative’ Kaos explains with a shrug, Luffy laughing at how it was how their family’s luck worked.

 

‘I can’t just let you kids fight these bastards while I stand around. I am the mayor and I won’t let them destroy my treasure!’ Boodle yells before running off, the others groan before chasing after him

 

 

‘Buggy!’ Mayor Boodle yells up at the pirates

 

‘Who are you and what do you want?’ Buggy asks with a mix of boredom and annoyance

 

‘I’m Mayor Boodle and I won’t let you destroy this village’

 

‘Little late to the party old man’ Buggy snorts in amusement

 

‘You hear me, you won’t get away with this, even if I die I won’t let you destroy my treasure’

 

Buggy grins ‘Then death it is!’ he yells shooting his hand out to strange the mayor only for it to be stopped ‘Straw Hat!; he yells in surprise

 

‘Yeah it’s me, I’m here to kick your ass just like I said I would’ he smirks before squeezing Buggy’s disembodied limb, causing the clown to twitch, before with a tug his hand flies out of Luffy’s and reattaches to his wrist

 

‘You little Shit, do you have any idea who I am? I’m Captain buggy and I won’t stand for such disrespect!’ Buggy yells angrily, but Luffy looks to ignore him

 

‘Get out of here children, this is my town so I must be the one to drive them out’ Boodle says, moving to stand but instead Kaos slams his head into the ground, knocking him out

 

‘Why’d you do that?’ Nami yells

 

‘He’d have died if we let him fight Buggy, he’s just knocked out so calm your tits’ Kaos answers with a dismissive wave, seemingly unfazed by the steadily reddening navigator as they wait to see what Luffy had planned next. (Haha, Luffy, plan. Silly humans)

 

‘HEY BIG NOSE!!’ Luffy yells at the top of his expanded lungs, Nami and Kaos finally being of one mind as they face palm their captain’s stupidity, Zoro on the other hand laughs weakly at Luffy’s directness

 

‘Fire another Buggy Ball at this flashy bastard and his crew!’ Buggy yells, Nami tensing as the cannon is moved and tilted to hit Luffy head on ‘Fire!’ he orders

 

**Gum Gum Balloon**

 

Luffy’s swollen stomach catches the projectile for a moment, enough for a collective **‘WTF/HOLY SHIT’** to pass through everyone, before shooting it right back at the Buggy pirates

 

**_ KA BOOOOM! _ **

 

‘Well that felt like a much bigger explosion, think we killed the idiots? Kaos asks

 

‘Not even close’ Buggy sneers as his disembodied hands release their grip on his crewmates

 

‘Using your own men as shields, disgusting’ Zoro growled, while Buggy just laughs

 

‘Ow my head, what the Hell happened?’ Monji groans then spots Buggy ‘Captain Buggy the 2 guys with Zoro, they’re not normal, they have Devil Fruit Powers!’

 

‘We already know idiot’ a man with half his head shaved scoffs, dropping Ritchie the lion with a thump ‘Allow me to show these fools why it is a bad idea to go against the Buggy pirates

 

Buggy shrugs ‘Fine Cabaji, just make it flashy’ the man nods and hops onto his unicycle before charging straight at Luffy with his sword drawn. It almost hit him, until Zoro blocked it

 

‘I’ll fight you, give me something to do on this island’ Zoro says grinning at the chance at a fight

 

‘Good decision Roronoa Zoro. Once I defeat you everyone will know the name of Acrobat Cabaji’

 

‘Hey Zoro you still need time to heal, let me do this’

 

‘Or I could, you’re not the only blade wielder on this crew you know’ Kaos adds after Luffy

 

‘No, I need to do this’ Zoro replies, and Cabaji grins

 

‘Acrobat technique: Flames of the old man’ he calls, blowing fire in Zoro’s face who blocks it with his swords, the unicyclist using the distraction to kick him in Buggy’s stab wound

 

‘Hey that’s not right’ Luffy yells angrily to which Kabaji just laughs

 

‘Not my fault he chose to fight with such a serious would, just makes things easier for me to beat him’

 

‘Acrobat technique: Murder at the steam bath’

 

‘Looks like a dust cloud to me’ Luffy comments Kaos and Nami nodding, Zoro would too but he was busy trying to track Cabaji, managing to block his sword strike but receiving another kick to his injured side

 

‘You done messing around?’ Zoro says with a grunt as he pulls himself to his feet once more ‘I plan to be the world’s greatest swordsman, I will not lose to some mockery of a sword swinger like you’ Cabaji scowls

 

‘Then I guess I’ll skip to my best technique. Acrobat Technique: A hike in the mountains’ the performer instead of going towards Zoro turns around and cycles up the side of a building, confusing everyone while Nami takes this moment to do her own thing.

 

‘Fireworks in the cool summer breeze’ Cabaji grins ‘Wheel stab’ turning his sword down before he began to drop

 

**Bara Bara Cannon**

 

‘I’ll hold him steady Cabaji’ Buggy calls, shooting his hand out to pin Zoro

 

‘Oh no you don’t’ Luffy says as he stomps on Buggy’s hand while Kaos steps between Zoro and Luffy ‘You want a fight so bad you deal with me!’

 

‘ **Pirate technique:** Praise the Sun’ Kaos calls, using his arms to reflect the sunlight back into Cabji’s eyes

 

‘Ah you bastard’ he grunts, knowing he’d already missed his target, what he didn’t expect was to be cut crisscrossed on his chest as well as his neck by Zoro

 

‘Stop with the tricks and fight for real’ it seemed the green haired swordsman was getting rather steadily pissed

 

Cabaji growls ‘Fine, I’ll just have to run you down and be the best swordsman. Acrobat technique: Final strike’ he yells, cycling towards Zoro

 

**Oni-Giri**

 

Cabaji falls to the ground, 3 deep slashes erupt from his body, Zoro grins for a moment before falling due to his stab wound.

 

‘Done, I’m going to take a nap. And we’re pirates not thieves you idiot’ he mumbles before snoring could be heard

 

Buggy raises an eyebrow ‘You morons are pirates?’

 

Luffy nods ‘Yep, we’re searching for the grand line’

 

‘Well more looking for a crew to traverse it, I’m fairly sure the GrandLine is over there but I’m no navigator’ Kaos smirks and Luffy rolls his eyes and Buggy starts to steam

 

‘That’s quite a dangerous quest you have planned, sailing the Grand Line. And what will you idiots do once you get to the GrandLine, draw a map and go on a cruise?’

 

‘Become King of the Pirates’ Luffy answers more seriously than usual, Kaos grinning at Buggy’s shocked/BSD face at the statement

 

‘You can’t be king you halfwit, that title belongs to me. Only I can become Pirate King and obtain all the treasure of the world’

 

Luffy sighs ‘You’re annoying, come on I promised you an asskicking’ Luffy says as he gets into a ready position

 

‘Fine you annoying little brat’ Buggy grumbles, knives filling his hands and with a kick one came out of the tips of each boot ‘ _Just like Red Hair, a pain in the ass. Even has that damn straw hat and stupid grin too_ ’ the clown thinks

 

**Bara Bara Rice cracker**

 

Luffy dodges the clowns lower half by hopping into the air, something which Buggy appeared to have expected ‘Can’t move in midair?’ he asks smugly before throwing his knives at him, looking mildly impressed when Luffy once more dodged, this time by streaching out, then pulling himself out of the way using a nearby building ‘Well, you are more interesting than I expected’

 

‘Same to you, now get a load of this…’

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

Buggy sidesteps the fist as it flies past his head and grabs a nearby tree ‘Quite impressive moves, but they make you a much bigger target’ he says pulling out yet another knife

 

**Gum Gum Sickle**

 

**Bara Bara eject**

 

Buggy’s head shot up into the air, just before Luffy’s arm would have hit it, causing the rubber boy to sail past and crash into the building across from him

 

‘Hahaha see kid, you have no chance against me…. HEY GET BACK HERE WITH MY TREASURE’ he starts yelling, having spotted Nami trying to make a break for it with a huge bag of loot, separating his top half and flying at her.

 

‘ _Cat burglar my ass’_ Kaos thinks to himself as he goes to deal with the clown

 

Luffy pulls himself out of the wreckage just as Buggy flies as Nami, only to collapse with his face frozen in severe pain, his lower half falling to the ground as Kaos lowers his leg.

 

‘Ow right in the Buggy balls, that was a cheap shot’ was croaked out of him

 

‘Who gives a shit, we’re all pirates here’ Kaos replies with a shark like grin.

 

Buggy slowly rises and reattaches his parts before yelling ‘You brats think you can make a fool out of me? I’m Buggy the Clown and I will not be beaten by the likes of you. Die Flashily!’

 

**Bara bara festival**

 

Buggy’s body separates into many more parts than before, all floating and rotating, before his blade filled hands fly at Nami, followed swiftly by the rest of him

 

‘Damn it, he’s split into even more parts’ Luffy worries as Buggy starts a tug-of-war with the thief, then he spots Buggy’s feet slowly walking towards the fight ‘ _Hmm, I wonder’_

 

While Buggy chased after Nami and his treasure Luffy tries an number of methods to distract the clown, including tickling pinching and slamming his foot into the ground, anyone wanting to known what a Morningstar being slammed onto their foot feels like is welcome to ask Buggy, seeing as Kaos was getting bored of the fight and wanted to see if blunt(ish) weapons would succeed where bladed ones failed

 

‘You idiots, knock it off!’ he yelled over to them, taking his eyes off Nami for a second

 

‘No you knock it off’ Nami yells back, slamming the treasure bag into Buggy’s face, unfortunately for her this worked in his favour

 

‘Thanks for giving me back my treasure (‘again’ Kaos mutters) Nami’ he grins as he tries to pull it from the thief, but Nami wasn’t giving up without a fight.

 

‘Let go’ ‘No you let go!’ this tug of war was going to take while, the 2 pirates could tell, neither as going to back down, their greed was too high their pride even more so

 

‘So should you break them up or should I?’ Luffy asks, Kaos chuckles letting his blade spin before tossing it at the bickering pair

 

The khopesh flies past the clown’s head, hitting the bag and ripping it, causing the contents to spill out…mostly on the pirate’s head, taking him out of the fight momentarily, a kick to the head by Luffy adding to his down time.

 

When Buggy did come too he was beyond angry ‘You little bastards think you can get away with trying to flashily do me in? Think again!’

 

**Bara bara assemble**

 

Buggy grins as his parts returned, until he noticed a) Straw Hat was also smiling and b) he was taller than Buggy even though he was crouching down at the moment

 

‘Hey Buggy, looking for these?’ he turns to a grinning Nami, standing on his tied up pasts, all but his head, hands and feet

 

‘My parts!’

 

‘All right Nami!’ Luffy cheers, swinging his arms back despite Buggy’s rather vocal protests ‘See yah Buggy!’

 

**Gum gum bazooka**

 

Chibi Buggy flies through the air, forming a little twinkle as he disappears

 

‘They took out Captain Buggy’

‘With barely a scratch on them’

‘Let’s just stay unconscious’

 

Kaos whistles ‘I don’t even think we could measure that, new record there Luffy’

 

‘And look at all this treasure, 10 million beri easily’ Nami practically drools as she rebags the loot, the guys meanwhile picking up Zoro so he could be moved

 

It was at this point a mob of villagers (finally and uselessly) arrived ‘Oh, you guys were still around after all, why’d you leave fighting the pirates to the old guy?’ Kaos thinks out loud, unfortunately drawing attention to himself and the unconscious mayor

 

‘Mayor Boodle, what did those pirates do to you?’ one asks

 

‘That wasn’t the Buggy pirates, that was Kaos’ Luffy points out as well as pointing to the guy, who like Nami face palms Luffy’s idiocy

 

‘You monster!’

‘Attacking our beloved mayor’

 

Kaos raises his hands defensively’ Hey, calm down, all I did was knock him out. It was for his own good, if he’d have continued to attack Buggy he’d have died very painfully’

 

Tensions eased slightly ‘Okay, I guess we should thank you guys for saving our village and driving away the pirates’ the mobs leader apologises

 

‘Our village is pirate free once again’ someone cheered

 

‘Actually, we’re pirates too’ Luffy corrects, putting his foot in his mouth once more. Kaos’ hand once more finds his face, while Nami was glaring at him so hard if she were Shanks Luffy’s head would have exploded

 

‘Pirates!’

‘You bastards are here to steal our treasure!’

 

‘But there’s nothing valuable in this dump’ Nami says before she could stop herself (speak-before-you-think appears to be spreading)

 

‘Get them!’ was yelled, the 2 pirates and thief running as fast s they could, while carrying their unconscious 4th member

 

About halfway across the village with the mob right behind them Kaos has an idea

 

‘Luffy, hold Zoro for a minute’ the rubber boy nods and takes Zoro onto his back, Kaos turning to face the mob, rolling up his sleeves slightly as he does ‘And now we bid you adiu…’

 

**Dazzle**

 

The fedora wearing pirate grins as the group stumble around blindly, catching up with the others just as they turned a corner and met a familiar creature

 

‘Shu Shu?’

‘Doggie!’ Luffy cheers, unfortunately alerting everyone to their prescience ‘Dammit!’

 

‘Bye Shu Shu’ Kaos rubs his head before they sidestep the dog and continue to run away, the dog holding off the villagers from his friends (and Nami) with the same stubbornness and determination as he’d defended his store

 

_ At the docks/beach _

 

‘Why’d you have one of Buggy’s boats?’ Luffy asks, referring to the clown’s Jolly Roger on the sail of Nami’s little boat

 

‘Stole it from some idiots’ Nami answered with a smirk…until she heard them

 

‘There you are, you witch’ was yelled as they Buggy pirates hop out of the other boat ‘Finally we can pay you back’ they begin to approach her till they hear a shrill whistle

 

‘Go’ Kaos orders, the pirates gulp before realising they were needed elsewhere and ran for their lives

 

‘Allright guys let’s get out of here!’ Luffy orders, Nami grumbling about how he wasn’t the boss of her but still followed anyway, because she wanted to leave as badly as the guys did

 

It wasn’t till they were already out at sea they heard yelling ‘Hey wait’

 

Kaos turns to look behind him ‘Hey look the mayor guy’s okay. Really hope he’s not here to yell at me’

 

‘Thank you young ones, thanks for saving my village’ he yells

 

Luffy grins ‘You’re welcome. Also look down’ Boodle does so and is shocked to see a large sack of what he later learns to be 5 million beri worth of treasure. Him broadcasting this information meant that it got to Nami almost as fast as it did the old man

 

‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LEFT THE TREASURE THERE?’ Nami yells, throttling Luffy from the other boat

 

‘They needed the money to repair the village’ Luffy defends but there was no reasoning with an angry Nami

 

‘YOU CAN’T JUST GIVE AWAY ALL MY HARD EARNED TREASURE!’

 

‘All he did was give away his half, no big’ Kaos sighs, unfortunately drawing Nami’s ire.

 

‘THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS! ALL TREASURE IS MINE!’ she practically screams into his face as she wails on the older guy, defending himself by crossing his arms until he grabs her by the face and throws her against the mast

 

‘Relax Gold-on, we’ll get more treasure, you’ll reach the 100mill soon enough’ he smiles with pointed teeth as he lies back and pushes his hat over his eyes.

 

TBC

 

LW: Well, that’s that. Next we have Usopp and a slight deviation from canon by the end of this island’s story, probably my first (other than Kaos) that will actually have consequences for more than the episode it occurs in

 

_ Luffy _

 

Gum Gum Shotgun: Oh boy, this is a real divergent moment. Yeah this isn’t the shotgun from the anime/manga, that will be known as Scatter shot when I get to that point, this is more for progression reasons, he has pistol which is one punch, then gattling which is a lot thrown super fast. While not much of a step up, throwing more than one at the same time is still progress.

Basically it’s a double Gum Gum Pistol to simplify everything.

Gum Gum Balloon: Luffy inflates his stomach which enables it to catch and bounce back larger projectiles his natural rubber body could redirect.

Gum Gum Sickle: Luffy grabs something behind his opponent and pulls himself towards it, his other stretched out arm clotheslining his opponent on the way there. Usually...

Gum Gum Bazooka: Luffy streches his arms back before slamming his opponent with a simultaneous double open palmed strike. Usually sends his foe flying, which is probably why it’s usually used as a finishing move (like it was here)

 

_ Zoro _

 

Oni-Giri: Zoro’s signature technique, a 3 way slashing manoeuvre that seems to be able to take out most things it hits.

 

_ Buggy _

 

Bara Bara Cannon: Buggy shoots out either his hand or arm at his enemy, depending on whether he has a weapon in hand this technique can be used to attack or just grab/distract his enemies

Bara Bara Eject: Known as Chop chop escape in the anime this fits more because only his head shoots off/escapes, the rest of his body is still just as open to attacks as before. Situationaly useful, such as when he dodged Luffy’s sickle attack.

Bara Bara Festival: Buggy splits his body into many parts, then uses them to trap his opponent, bludgeon them with the lumps or in the case of any blade wielding appendages stabbing them.

Bara Bara Assemble: Buggy recalls all his parts and reforms… whatever can reach him.

 

Praise the Sun is basically Dazzle but Kaos is taking the piss at how all Kabaji’s moves start with the name ‘Acrobat technique’


	5. Pinocchio Cats

Usopp: Welcome everyone, time for the real main character to finally make his appearance, the mighty Captain Us….

Kaos: Get out, out, out, out!

Usopp: Ahhh (runs away)

Kaos: Done boss

LW: Thanks for that. Now we have that interruption out of the way, onward to Gecko Island

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Pinocchio Cats

 

_ Middle of nowhere – East Blue _

 

‘The next island we find better have meat’

‘And booze’

‘I won’t say no to either’

 

‘ _Ugh men!_ You idiots! We need more than meat and booze if we’re going to sail the Grand Line! We’ll need proper supplies as well as a strong enough ship to get there’ Nami yells

 

‘Wasn’t a problem when you were trying to solo the map’ Kaos mutters tiredly

 

‘I wasn’t stealing it to use but to sell. Maps of the Grand Line are rare and usually incomplete, this one being fairly close as far as I can tell’ Nami explains, her boat mate nodding in understanding ‘Anyway, the nearest island is Gecko, we should be able to get a real ship from someone on the island.

 

‘Sounds like a plan. Let’s find a ship, a cook and a musician. Onward!’ Luffy yells while Zoro and Kaos nodding in agreement, Nami rolling her eyes but smiled very slightly, these people were insane but they were growing on her, being tolerable…for pirates

 

‘Well this is a nice place’ Kaos says as they make land and make their way off their boats onto the beach

 

‘You said it, now where’s the meat?’ Luffy wonders

 

‘PIRATES!’ the quartet hear yelling and looking up see a guy with a long nose around Luffy’s age on top of the cliffs in front of them, the forest erupting in strange pirate flags ‘You have invaded the territory of the mighty Usopp pirates and we won’t let you harm this village, leave now and my army of 80,000 ruthless crewmates won’t tear you apart’ he threatens, Luffy staring up in awe, Kaos looking unimpressed

 

‘This is so cool!’ Luffy yells excitedly

 

‘He’s lying, there aren’t 80,000 able bodied men on this island, never mind those willing to follow this kid’ Kaos waves his hand in Usopp’s direction, the younger boy deflating for a moment

 

‘Oh no they know I lied’

 

‘And he’s just admitted he was lying’ Nami says, pinching the bridge of her nose

 

‘What! He was lying?’ Luffy yells, then deflates in disappointment

 

‘Yep, he’s got 3 maybe 4 under his control’ Kaos answers, Nami nodding

 

‘Yeah 3 sounds about right’

 

This causes Pepper, Carrot and Onion to run away screaming, leaving just Usopp

 

‘Hm, slingshot wielding pirates, now I’ve seen it all’ Nami chuckles

 

‘We haven’t made it to the Grand Line yet Nami, I’d hold off on a declaration like that for a while’ Kaos argues, Luffy laughing at everything that’s just happened

 

‘Hey, don’t laugh, shut up before I shut you up!’ he shouts, arming his slingshot

 

‘Now you’ve drawn a weapon are you willing to use it?’ Kaos asks flatly, his smirk surprisingly vacant

 

Luffy raises an eyebrow before his eyes widen in realisation and smirks under his hat ‘he’s right, guns aren’t for threats, they’re for actions. Are you willing to risk your life?’

 

Usopp and Luffy engage in an intense staring contest, Usopp’s determined glare against Luffy’s blank expression. This lasted a few minutes of silence before Usopp lets go… and the bearing fell at his feet with a plop

 

Usopp sighs ‘Being brave is a lot easier when you can back it up’ he says, surprised to see the brothers burst out laughing

 

‘Shishishi, we totally stole that from Red Haired Shanks’

 

‘Yeah, you should have seen his face. Sesese Shanks would be so proud’ Kao then stops, his hand moved to his chin in a thinking position ‘Hey Luffy, this guy look familiar to you?’ he asks

 

‘I don’t think so, I’m sure I’d remember someone with a nose that long’ Luffy shrugs, while Usopp collapses anime style (Luckily backwards as opposed to forwards)

 

‘Not the nose idiot, though it should help you remember where you’d heard a description like that’ Kaos waited for the penny to drop, not needing to see when his eyes widen and a grin splits his face, though the confirmation was still liked when he turns to him

 

‘Really, he’s the guy?’

 

‘Only one way to find out, hey Usopp, is your dad’s name Yassop?’

 

‘Yeah, how’d you know?’

 

Luffy laughed ‘We met him when he stopped on our village. He was the Sniper on Shank’s crew’

 

Usopp’s eyes light up ‘Really? My dad was part of Red haired Shanks crew?’

 

‘Yep’

 

 

_ Later, in a place with meat and booze _

 

‘Know anywhere we could get a ship?’ Kaos asks, Luffy busy stuffing his face

 

Usopp shook his head ‘No this is a pretty small village, we don’t need really big ships around here’

 

Nami frowns ‘Then what about up there? They might be able to get us a ship’ she says, pointing to the mansion at the top of the hill

 

‘Don’t go anywhere near that house!’ Usopp explodes shocking the group’ Um… I’ve got to go, eat all you want, my treat’ he then speeds out the door. Nami looking suspiciously while the guys continued eating/drinking

 

‘ _Why was he in such a rush?… weirdo_ ’ Nami thinks to herself, before picking up an apple

 

_ Later, again _

 

‘…And how are we supposed to afford all the food Luffy’s eaten, and the alcohol Zoro’s drunk?’ Nami argues, Kaos sighing before removing a handful of notes and placing them on the table

 

‘Happy now?’ he asks, Nami just grumbles, while the other 2 chuckle to themselves

 

Suddenly there comes the yelling of children as the 3 kids rush in

 

‘Where’s our captain?’ one asks

 

Kaos and Zoro’s eyes meet, then they smile and nod, just before Luffy groans, leaning back rubbing his bloated belly

 

‘Mmmm, that was some good meat’ he sighs

 

‘Meat?’

 

‘You really want to know where your captain is?’ Zoro asks, the kids nod reluctantly ‘We ate him’ it was a mix of Luffy’s comidically inflated belly, Kaos’ slasher smile and Zoro’s serious tone that meant the kids believed them, but they blamed the wrong person

 

‘Sea Witch!’ they screamed, Nami yelling back with shark teeth

 

_ 10 minutes later _

 

‘You got us good’ Onion giggled

 

‘Yeah we did. Hey you guys are Usopp’s crew, any idea where he went a little while ago?’ Luffy asks

 

‘Oh he’s probably off lying again’ Carrot said happily

 

‘That’s not something to be proud of’ Nami argues

 

The kids then explain to the Straw Hats abut Kaya: the girl who lived in the mansion, how her parents died and she became depressed and sickly, but then Usopp started showing up at her window and telling her outrageous tales of his _adventures_ , making her smile and laugh like she used to even if only for a while.

 

‘You do know you could just call him a storyteller rather then liar?’ Kaos notes, Zoro nods in agreement

 

‘Usopp is so cool and nice’ Luffy grins, while the kids have returned to staring at Nami (and this is back when her boobs were normal sized so it’s not for that reason)

 

‘Stop looking at me like that, it’s annoying!’ She yells scaring them again

 

‘Hey kids, you know there are easier ways to piss her off right?’ Kaos grins widely and Luffy freezes as he’s reminded of some advice/information Shanks gave him while he was on the island…

 

** ‘Luffy what I’m about to tell you is a list of things that can cause any woman to enter a bezerker rage, where they will not stop until they beat the source of their anger into a bloody pulp’ **

****

**‘All women?’**

** ‘All women’ **

**‘Even Makino?’**

****

** ‘Even Maki… she’s behind me isn’t she?’ **

**‘Yep. Is talking about it one of the triggers?’**

****

** ‘ ** _ Gulp. _ ** Yeah.  ** _ This is going to hurt so much’ _

 

 

Nami tenses ‘Don’t you even think…’

 

**SMACK**              _AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!_

 

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

‘…and I escaped on a giant rubber bandball’ Usopp finished, Kaya giggled as usual at his silly story

 

‘Storyteller Usopp indeed’ Usopp turns and Kaya looks around him to see Kaos sitting on the branch with a wide grin on his face

 

‘Who are you?’ Kaya asks Usopp getting between them

 

‘Nobody special, just a new recruit for the Usopp pirates’ he lied more smoothly than usual

 

‘I’d be angry but you’re right about me not being special yet’ he stands ‘My name is Serpens D Kaos Miss Kaya, pleased to meet you’ the 2 shake hands

 

‘How’d you get in here?’

 

‘Usopp left your hedge disturbed. I simply followed the trail, don’t worry I fixed it on the way’ Kaos explained Usopp face palmed at his own stupidity

 

‘Hey where are the others?’ he asks

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

The yell was followed by 5 screams which instantly gets their attention. Luffy drops to the ground just fine, then lets go of the others who sit there in shock, Nami being the exception who was still on the rampage

 

‘There they are’ Kaos answers, before Nami attacks him

 

‘You bastard, never touch my ass again!’ she growls as Luffy winces, they may be used to pain given Garps ‘ _training_ ’ routines, but even he’d be vulnerable to Nami’s foot slamming into his _gentleman’s region_ which lead to the fedora wearing pirate falling out of the tree

 

‘Hi Usopp, we found you again. You must be Kaya’ Luffy greets loudly

 

‘Um yes’ Kaya answers, more nervously than she would have liked

 

‘Great! You see we really need a new…’

 

‘What the Hell is going on here?’ yelled a grumpy looking man with a suit and golden turds on his coat, pushing his glasses up with his palm (I can’t be the only person to notice those things.)

 

‘Klahadore’ Kaya whines

 

‘Miss Kaya you’re still terribly ill, go back to bed’ he says reassuringly before turning to the others ‘All business can be done through me’

 

‘Okay, can we have a ship then?’ Luffy repeats, but Klahadore just laughs

 

‘As if I’d give a ship to lowly pirates like yourselves’ he then spots Usopp in the tree ‘Ah Usopp, telling more lies are we? Not that I expect much better from the son of a filthy pirate’ Kaya gasps and Usopp clench his jaw

 

‘Klahadore that’s not nice’

 

‘I’m doing what’s best for you Miss Kaya, hanging out with a pirate’s son will bring you nothing but trouble. Ready to admit the truth Usopp or spread another lie, maybe he’s an honest merchant or training to become a marine…’

 

‘Enough!’ Usopp shouts, using his grapple to hop out of the tree and land unharmed. He then goes to punch Klahadore in his smug face but was stopped by Kaos, mostly because he was the closest to the long nosed boy

 

‘You are one of the dumbest humans I’ve ever met’ Kaos sighs as he keeps a tight grip on the sniper, Klahadore chuckles in amusement

 

‘It seems your new friend has seen the real you already’ he smirks

 

‘I was talking about you shitty butler not Usopp’ he deadpans, shocking Usopp and Klahadore

 

‘What!’

 

‘You spit on a pirate you know nothing about. Tell me, would you be so quick to badmouth Usopp if he was the son of a Shichibukai?’ he grins when Klahadore tenses ‘Exactly’

 

‘It doesn’t matter, he’s not the son of a Warlord, so what was the point of that?’ Klahadore argues and Kaos nods

 

‘True, but what he is, is the son of a very strong pirate, Yasopp is the sniper of Red Haired Shanks, he’s the 3rd strongest man in a Yonko’s crew’ Klahadore turns a sickly pale colour ‘I’m glad you understand, oh and one more thing…’ he steps forward and punches the fucker square in the face ‘…that’s for being a condescending jackass. I think it’s time to go guys, we won’t get much more around here’ he turns to leave, Luffy and the others following him

 

_ A safe distance away _

 

‘I still don’t get why you didn’t let me punch him, especially when you hit him yourself’ Usopp complained, Kaos sighed

 

‘It was to maintain your relationship with Kaya’ at Usopp’s confusion (and blush) he continues ‘Kaya looked conflicted, she cared about both you and the jackass, she tried defending you but still probably wouldn’t want to see him hurt. If you’d hit him she’d have been mad at you and Klahadore would have won. This way she can hate me all she likes, you’re still in a better position to butler’

 

Usopp sighs ‘Thanks for that, but I think I need some time to process everything’ he says before running off

 

‘What a weird guy’ Nami thinks out loud, neither Zoro nor Kaos admitting they thought the same

 

‘I’m going to go check on him’ Luffy says before running off in the direction Usopp went

 

‘That’s nice, hey wait weren’t there like 3 of you?’ Kaos asks the 2 Usopp pirates

 

‘Yeah there are, but sometimes Onion disappears on his own then returns with crazy ideas like…’

 

;Help! There’s some weird background walking guy heading this way!’

 

‘Like that?’ Zoro asks, the other kids nodding

 

 

‘Now which one of you had the nerve to call me weird’ Jango asks, Kaos pointing to Onion ‘I’m not weird I’m just an ordinary hypnotist’ he says flatly, getting the kids attention

 

‘Hypnotist?’

‘For real?’

‘Can we see?’

 

‘I wouldn’t just reveal my tricks to some kids…okay here we go’ he pulls out a metal ring on some string ‘You are getting very sleepy, at the count of Jango you will fall asleep. Are you ready?’

 

**1, 2, Jango**

 

He clicks his fingers and all 3 kids are on the ground asleep….. And so was Jango

 

‘Fucking idiot’ Zoro mutters, then notices Kaos hadn’t moved

 

‘Don’t tell me he’s asleep too?’ Nami groans until his head tilts enough for her to see his face

 

‘Not from the hypnotism, but I’m bored enough I might as well sleep now. Plus I get the feeling I won’t be getting any sleep tonight so might as well get some now’ he pushes his hat down over his eyes and does so, Nami sighing but gives up easily

 

_ With Luffy and Usopp _

 

‘I really hate that butler Klahadore’ Usopp grumbles

 

‘Yeah he seemed like such a dick. Hey isn’t that him there?’ Luffy asks, pointing down under the cliffs

 

‘Yeah it is, what’s he doing here? And who’s that guy with him?’ Usopp asks frantically, Luffy shrugs because how the Hell would he know?

 

‘Don’t know, but he looks like a weirdo’

 

 

‘Jango I told you to be subtle, stealthy and inconspicuous, none of which would describe sleeping in the middle of the road’ Klahadore growled, adjusting his glasses with his palm

 

‘I’m always stealthy, nobody knows why I’m here, and the boys are ready and waiting’

 

‘So my plan is ready?’

 

‘Yes. Captain Kuro, we’re all ready whenever you are to _Operation: **Murder the Rich Girl**_!’

 

‘ _What!_ ’ Luffy and Usopp think

 

‘Not murder, we need it to look like an accident or at least that she wasn’t targeted’ Kuro states

 

‘Right, accident, got it Captain Kuro’ Jango nods

 

‘And don’t call me that, I’m Klahadore here!’

 

‘Right, so basically me and the men storm the village and the girl ‘accidentally’ dies during the raid. Then you get the inheritance and we strike it big’ Jango repeats to show he understands

 

‘You idiot! We’re not related, how would inherit anything?’

 

‘Sheer force of will, and determination’ Jango nods and Kuro looks ready to throttle him

 

‘No Jango, when the men attack you need to hypnotise Kaya into signing away her fortune to me, then and only then can you kill her. Once that’s done I will have control of her enormous fortune and my 3 year plan will be complete. And nobody will be able to stop me’

 

‘3 years already. You had me and the men worried back then boss, saying you were done, having a patsy take the fall and be executed in your place. But it seems even that was just step one of this plan. You really are still Kuro of the 1,000 plans after all’ Jango laughs and Klahadore grimaces

 

‘Never say that name again, I abandoned it years ago. My pirate days are over, I plan to obtain my wealth without the unnecessary attention piracy brings. You could say I’m a pacifist now’ Jango laughs again

 

‘Pacifist? Right, murdering an entire family definitely sounds peaceful’

 

Klahadore raises an eyebrow ‘I haven’t murdered an entire family, the father was an accident’

 

‘Whatever, I’m just glad we’re moving along now, it’s been a week since we reached this island and the men are getting antsy’ Jango shrugs

 

 

‘Hey bad guys, you better stay away from Kaya. We heard everything!’ Luffy yells, Usopp stays in shock and horror, Kuro frowning and Jango looking at him confused

 

‘Want me to do something Captain?’

 

Klahadore shakes his head ‘Nobody will believe them, especially not Usopp. On the other hand I think they need to sleep it off, don’t you Jango?’

 

‘Right Captain. Watch the ring boys’ he yells up at them

 

‘Um okay’ Luffy says with a shrug

 

‘You will sleep at the count of Jango’

 

**1,2, Jango!**

 

Usopp had already started to run but Luffy was hit, conking out where he stood…until he tipped forward, fell down the cliff and hit the below with a thump

 

‘Well that wasn’t the plan, I didn’t mean to kill the kid’ Jango said, feeling bad for the boy getting caught at the wrong place at the wrong time

 

‘Forget about him, prepare the men to attack at dawn’

 

‘Yes Captain’

 

_ With the other straw hat and Usopp pirates _

 

‘Captain’s been gone a while’ Carrot says worryingly

 

‘He’ll be fine, sometimes he just needs to think’

 

‘With Luffy there I doubt he’s getting much of that done’ Zoro mutters while Kaos smirks under his hat

 

‘Still he’s probably still at the sh…’ Pepper begins but stops when he sees Usopp running towards them with a serious look on his face ‘There he is’ he cheers but frowns when their captain runs right by him

 

‘Where could he be off to in such a rush?’ Nami asks, the kids shrug

 

‘And better question, where the hell is Luffy?’ Kaos asks as he stands up

 

‘Maybe he’s at the secret place’

‘Yeah we can take you’

‘If you want’

 

Kaos groans ‘Sure, just never speak like that again’

 

‘Got it’ they agreed in unison

 

‘That’ll do I guess’

 

_ Usopp’s secret place _

 

‘I don’t see him’ Zoro says as they search the area of Usopp’s thinking place for Luffy

 

‘Where could that idiot be?’ Nami thinks aloud

 

**AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**

 

Everyone comes running when they heard Onion’s scream, Kaos grabbing him from the edge of the cliff before he fell

 

‘Get over here before you kill yourself you idiot’ he scolds, but is shocked when the kid yells back

 

‘I found Luffy and I see why Captain Usopp came running, he’s dead’ Nami and Zoro peer over to check and just like Onion said there was Luffy, unmoving at the bottom of the cliff face

 

They make their way down to the fallen rubberboy, the kids notably shaken as it was their first dead body. Kaos kneels, most likely to pay respect after removing Shanks Hat… when he feels shallow breath on his hand. Yanking the straw hat off him he sees Luffy isn’t dead, just sound asleep

 

‘Well it was definitely the hypnotist guy’ Kaos says just before Nami decides to slap him awake.

 

‘That was a good nap. Hey guys what I miss?’ he asks, not at all surprised they were all on a beach

 

_‘Only you Luffy’_ the straw hats think as their captain hops up, a lot more seriously

 

‘Oh yeah, now I remember. That butler guy and some weirdo are planning for pirates to attack the village’

 

_ Later – back by that fence _

 

‘Okay, now all we need to do is find Usopp and … oh shit!’ Kaos hisses when they see the long nosed boy hobble over looking worse for wear, chief amongst them his bleeding arm

 

‘What happened?’ Luffy asks

 

Usopp winces as he holds his arm ‘You were right, I tried to warn them but they didn’t listen, they got very angry instead and attacked me’

 

‘This before or after you acused Kaya’s butler of being a pirate?’ Zoro asks

 

‘Before but they didn get more mad when I told them Klahadore was a pirate named Kuro, then there was Kaya…’ he paused and looked at the floor

 

‘What happened?’

 

_ Flashback _

 

‘Please trust me on this Kaya I’m just trying to keep you alive, and the only way to do that is get you as far away from here as possible’ Usopp says before they both go out the window, landing safely on the ground with Kaya in a bridal position. Unfortunately Merry alerted the guards to Usopp’s prescience (wonder where they were in a few episodes) and he was forced to knock them out with his sling shot. ‘Come on Kaya we need to move now!’ he grunts as he tries to lead her to the escape hole in her hedge but she held form better than expected for such a sickly looking girl ‘Kaya this will all make sense tomorrow but until then you need to trust me and come o…’

 

**_SMACK_ **

 

It was hard to know who was more shocked, Usopp with his wide eyes and quickly forming bruise, or Kaya who was looking at her hand as if she’d never seen it before in her life. Looking up she saw pain but also a sense of loss and hopelessness that made her sick to her stomach. The sniper held in his tears as he turned away, the action hurting Kaya more than either expected

 

‘U-u-usopp’ Kaya begins, stuttering as she stretches out her arm to him

 

‘Miss Kaya!’ Mary yells, running out of the mansion with a pistol ‘Let her go you roughian’ he orders, hands shaking

 

‘Mary stop, please’ Kaya pleads as Usopp turns his head to see the butler

 

BANG

 

The gun goes off, grazing his arm and Mary tosses the gun away in shock, Usopp taking this moment to leave as quickly as he could

 

_ End _

 

‘While I admit trying to kidnap her was a bad idea, damn!’ Kaos says, squeezing Usopp’s shoulder in an attempt at comfort

 

‘I know that but I was getting desperate, I can’t let her die’ Usopp sniffles

 

‘Then we won’t let her’ Luffy states, his face surprisingly serious ‘These guys want to destroy the village and kill your friend we’re not going to let them’ he finishes, the others surprised by the declaration

 

‘Well in that case, kids it’s time to leave’ Kaos announces, getting very loud denials from the 3 Usopp pirates, until there was a blade against their throats ‘They will you down and just keep walking, so run along home and pretend this never happened, understand?’ he removed the blade so they could nod before following the order, but even with that threat they still grabbed Usopp and told him to keep Kaya safe, and that they believe in him, which made the town liar smile despite his pain.

 

‘That was a dick move dumbass’ Nami scolds, the taller pirate shrugs in reply

 

‘Kuro’s pirates won’t care they’re just kids, they’re here to level the town and kill an innocent girl, 3 more kids won’t stain their conscience that much. I don’t want them to get hurt when I can stop it. Scaring them a little so that they live to see the next day is okay with me’ he elaborates before turning to Luffy and Usopp ‘So what’s the plan?’

 

‘Well the only way to get from the shore to the village is up a slope, because the rest of the shore is made of sheer cliffs’

 

‘Yeah we found that out earlier, made getting down to Luffy a pain’ Zoro complains but nods as he’s still following

 

‘Well I was thinking if we attack while they’re crammed into the narrow slope it won’t matter the numbers if they can’t use them. Plus maybe we can set up a few surprises for the bastards, which they won’t see in the low light to give us a little extra advantage’

 

Kaos smiles ‘I like it, better than Luffy’s plans’

 

‘What are those?’

 

‘Hit him till he goes down’ Luffy answers without a hint of shame

 

‘Well better get to work then. Help me get a few barrels of oil and caltrops, plus some tacs’

 

‘Bastard was right about not getting any sleep tonight’ Nami grumbles realising how much prep work they’re going to need to do

 

‘Well at least once everything’s ready, we’ll take these guys down easy’ Zoro replies

 

_ Next Day – Just before dawn _

 

‘Hey Usopp, are you sure they’ll show up here?’

 

‘The long nose shrugged ‘I think so, this is where they had their meeting’ then he paled

 

‘You look worried, what’s the problem?’ Kaos asks

 

‘There is somewhere else they could launch an attack, the North Slope, on the other side of the island’

 

‘FUCK!’

 

 

Usopp skirted around all the traps while Luffy’s rubber body enabled him to simply bounce over the problems, Kaos going with a similar method jumped onto and used both Zoro and Nami’s shoulders to springboard up to the top. This decision caused Nami to stumble and loose her balance, but following a ‘ _needs of me means more than you’_ shoved into Zoro getting herself to safety while also causing the yelling and swearing swordsman to fall to the bottom of the booby trapped slope

 

_ North shore _

 

‘Captain Kuro does not like delays, so move it’ Jango orders then watches the men run up the slope, until some of them start to fall

 

‘They knew we were coming’

‘It’s an ambush’

 

Jango’s shades flash and he grins ‘Well, it seems we meet again long nose’

 

‘I won’t le you attack my village or hurt Kaya’

 

‘And what make you think you can stop us all alone?’

 

‘YOU BETTER KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY TREASURE!’ An angry blur shot to the top of the slope, Nami practically steaming as she pulls out her bo staff

 

‘My mistake, you think the 2 of you can stop all of us?’

 

Usopp looks around, worried when he only sees Nami pop up behind him ‘ _Where are the others? They were all faster and had longer strides than us_ ’

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

_‘Damn it Usopp, which way is North?!’_ Luffy screams internally

 

‘Do you have any idea where we’re going?’ Kaos asks with a sigh

 

‘Nami! I’ll kill you for this you bitch!’ Zoro yells from the bottom of the slope

 

_ Back with the others _

 

‘So, now that you’ve shown up I can hang back and take command’ Usopp begins to turn but get Nami’s staff to the gut

 

‘Oh no you don’t, you think I can take on a boatload of pirates by myself? That’s suicide!’

 

‘Well I certainly wasn’t going to do it, plus in case you hadn’t realised I’m a coward and more importantly a ranged fighter, hence the slingshot and you are not, if you want to do anything in this fight you need to go down there and fight’

 

‘No way, without Luffy, Kaos and Zoro that’s one of the dumbest plans I’ve ever heard I’m not going down there’

 

‘Well neither am I!’

 

‘ _We don’t have time for this nonsense_. If I can cut in…’

 

‘Nobody asked you!’

 

‘Well you weaklings can argue about things later, because right now we’re tearing up this tiny village!’ Jango yells ‘Men! Charge!’ the black cats easily walking through the coward and the thief until…

 

**Gum Gum Gattling**

**Oni-Giri**

**Crescent Wave**

 

They all went flying back over their heads landing at Jango’s feet as 3 people appear at the top, all of which were varying levels of annoyed

 

‘Usopp you bastard, how was I supposed to know which way North was?’ Luffy yells angrily

 

‘Lucky those kids knew where the North slope was’ Kaos adds, pushing up his hat with his left while holding his blade with his right

 

‘Nami you bitch, you didn’t need to push me into those traps, if there weren’t bigger problems I’d kick your ass right now!’ Zoro growled around Wado, despite herself Nami gulped in fear

 

Things are about to a get a lot more interesting now the main fighters are actually present

 

TBC

 

LW: Well this is part one of probably 3 if I judged this correctly, if not then Sryup Village will be another 2 chapter arc like Orange Town and (technically) Romance Dawn.

 

_ Reviews _

 

**_BlazeXDemon_** : I'll answer both together as I got both at the same time:

 

Don't really understand the question about Hancock, I suppose it would have a few funny moments like her thinking ' _If my brother is also Luffy's brother, does that mean we're already married_?' and stuff like that, plus I think he'd be able to have her a bit more calm and saner than canon (actually scratch that last one, Kaos would need to be sane in order for that to be true). It would make something I hope to do in the future awkward though. Sorry that probably doesn't answer what you wanted answered

 

Going to assume you meant Nami, as it's the only thing that makes sense, also should probably consider myself lucky you used 2 or's instead of 2 and/or seeing as I did say there would be multi's, of which some of them are connected to Luffy and Kaos (but not to each other of course). I'll tell you this ahead of time one of the people on that list is paired with Kaos, the other 2 are paired with our loveable idiot Captain Luffy, and the Love Cook Vinsmoke Sanji.

 

_ Techniques/Lore _

 

Luffy

Gum Gum Gattling: Luffy unleashes a flurry of punches so quickly it looks as if he has multiple arms, the difference is important but not for the moment.

 

Kaos

Crescent Wave: After spinning to build up energy Kaos unleashes 2 horizontal swings, the combined power producing a crescent shaped shockwave (hence the name) which will knock normal level enemies away and cause more damage the closer they are to the point of origin. It doesn’t have the best range and needs a minute to set up so it probably won’t be used that often, but you never know.

 

**Shichibukai** : The ‘7 Warlords’ basically they’re pirates under the employ of the WG, making them privateers in the sense of our world. This will all be explained later when it becomes relevant. (Looking at you Yosaku, don’t fuck this up)

 

**Yonko** : The strongest and most dangerous pirates on the Grand Line, the ‘4 Emperors’ all have territory in the New World under their control/protection and are too powerful for the marines and World Government to directly address or deal with. This is kind of a spoiler for some but currently the only Yonko to be mentioned in this story is Red Haired Shanks.(Don’t worry that flashback has just been moved to between Loguetown and the Grand line)


	6. Hypnosis and Catclaws

LW: Hey guys, as a special gift for being consistently getting chapters out on a fortnightly basis, I have a friend of mine doing the intro instead of an OP character. Take it away bud

IP: Oh gosh! Someone tried to light me on fire! Hey I haven't been here before thanks for letting me be here LW! Hello Ladies and Gentlemen I am the Invisible Prince! Fabulous writer, beautiful hair, skinniest person to eat a can of frosting straight and I should probably stop talking before people leave thinking I'm an arrogant D-bag. Anyway LW is a good friend of mine and is able to put up with a guy like me. Anywho enjoy the chapter and if you are interested or really flippin bored check out my stories... or not it’s your choice!

LW: Hm, didn’t know Ace was going to be in this intro… oh well thanks buddy, please guys at least have peek at his work. And on with the chapter! :D

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Hypnosis and cat claws

 

‘ _This is bad, Kuro won’t like his plans being delayed’_ Jango thinks before pulling out his chakram ‘Everyone look here! On the count of Jango you will all be fully healed and super strong, enough to destroy the village’ he says as he swings the bladed disk

 

‘He’s kidding right?’ Nami whispers, Usopp and Luffy shrug as Kaos rolls up his sleeves

 

**One, Two…**

**Dazzle!**

**…Jango!**

 

Just before he could finish a blinding flash of light filled the beach, assisted by the hypnotist’s own mirrored sunglasses

 

‘They’re still on the ground’ Usopp cheers

 

‘Of course, his hypnosis needs line of sight to work. Dazzle stoped that, well for the most part’ he grins and starts to walk forward

 

Jango growls ‘You bastard! You ruined everything’ he yells, slamming his fist into the ground, leaving a small crater… it seems Captain Jango’s hypnotised himself again

 

‘Did you know that due to the way my fruit works I’m immune to some of its effects?’ Kaos asks

 

‘Makes sense, your arms flash outwards and they’re in front of your face’ Nami answers then shrugs ‘What’s that got to do with anything?’

 

‘Plenty’ Kaos smiles as he turns his head up, revealing white eyes, Jango’s hypnotism got him ‘Now if you’ll excuse me I have a weirdo to punch the fuck out’

 

Kaos ran full pelt at Jango, dodging the hypnotist’s punch (leaving another crater in the wall) by jumping into a handstand on the man’s shoulders, then spring boarding over him and kicking him in the shoulder, smirking at the audible crack it caused. Jango reacts with a swift kick to the side, tossing Kaos several feet before he gets to his feet

 

‘ _Damn I think he cracked a rib’_ he thinks, the stabbing pain and grinding confirmed it _‘Yep definitely a rib… maybe 2’_ he tries to find a position where it didn’t feel like he was stabbing himself in the lung so was surprised when Jango practically appeared out of thin air in front of him

 

‘You’re easily distracted’ Jango says as he throws a right cross to the pale man’s face, Kaos rolling on the ground before standing up with a bloody grin, coughing a little before spitting up a wad of blood

 

‘Impressive, guess you’re more than just a shitty hypnotist after all’ he shrugs ‘Still I’m afraid I can’t let you harm this village’ Jango quirks an eyebrow before Kaos became like a shining blur and the Black Cat captain was clothes lined, the forward momentum throwing him into and destroying their ship’s figurehead. Kaos sighs before dropping to his knees with a grunt: the enhanced strength Jango’s hypnotism grants really does a number on you once it ends, coupled with the injures the hypnotist’s own super strength caused and he was going to need a few minutes if Luffy or the others needed anything. Though at least he had these weaklings’ mutters to amuse himself with.

 

‘He took out Jango’

‘Yeah but he looks nearly done himself’

‘You volunteering to get rid of that behemoth?’

‘Nah I ain’t that stupid’

‘Let’s just finish the plan while he’s there, the others looked like pushovers in comparison’

‘Yeah’

 

Zoro snorts ‘Hey Luffy, want to deal with these morons?’

 

‘Sure’ the rubber boy nods, marching in place and punching the air

 

The swordsman smirks ‘Then let ‘em have it’ he orders, Luffy running into the crowd of enemy pirates

 

**Gum Gum Gattling**

 

Even though he was still coughing up blood and shakily rising to a standing position Kaos grinned; Luffy was going to wipe the floor with those idiots, possibly Jango too again, knowing the side effect of a moving gattling at the moment… Once Luffy starts, stopping is a problem, one Jango and the Black Cats were about to learn if any of them were brave enough to stand in the rubber boy’s way

 

Seeing Luffy’s multiple flying fists on a collision course for his face Jango groans and fumbles for his ring, swinging it a few times her quickly order ‘On the count of Jango you will fall asleep!’

 

**1, 2, Jango**

 

Luffy stopped running, immediately keeling over, loud snores escaping his unconscious form

 

‘You people are starting to annoy me. Meowban Brothers, Sham! Buchi! Get out here now!’ Jango orders and 2 more guys leave the ship: one was a large round man with a bell on his neck and the other was a thinner green haired man, both in similarly cat themed attire, none of the group were really sure what to make of the 2

 

_‘Great, more weirdoes’_ Nami thinks, really hating this island

 

‘Yes Captain?’

 

‘We need to get up this hill but our path is blocked by that green haired swordsman, I need you to remove him’ Jango explains, the brothers look at Zoro who glares and they tense

 

‘No way, he’s much too strong for us! Right Buchi?’ Sham, the green one shrieks

 

‘Right!’ Buchi agrees

 

‘Besides, we’re just meant to guard the ship, not do actual fighting’ Sham adds

 

‘Hm, bunch of scardy cats indeed’ Zoro mutters angrily, why’d the others get to fight and he was stuck with these morons?

 

Jango growls and hits both of them ‘This is no time for that act, if we don’t get moving quickly Kuro will have our heads! Sham get to it!’ he yells

 

‘Yes boss’ he nods and charges, almost vanishing in a burst of speed which Zoro barely manages to block

 

_‘Damn this bastard’s strong’_

 

‘I’m impressed you managed to block me’ Sham smirks and licks his hand ‘You have some skills but don’t think it means you can beat Sham of the Black Cat Pirates’

 

It was then Zoro notices what’s on the cat weirdo’s back ‘Hey those swords are mine give them back!’

 

‘Why, you already have one you don’t need anymore’ Sham laughs and tosses them down the slope ‘Bye, bye swords, not that it matters you have bigger things to worry about’ he lashes out again, Zoro mostly ignoring him other than taking a slice at him in his mad dash for his swords, Unfortunately Sham was faster than he looked and managed to restrain Zoro, slamming into his back ‘Buchi, get over here!’

 

‘Oh right, my turn’ the larger brother hopped into the fray, only a well timed dodge stopping him bulk landing on Zoro’s head

 

‘You missed Buchi’ ‘Well I won’t a 2nd time, hold him still better next time’ the brothers argued

 

Zoro grunts ‘I do better with 3 swords but 1 will have to do against you idiots’

 

‘We better get to work then’ Sham grins and the brothers leap at the swordsman

 

**Grand March of the Pussywillows**

 

Reduced to only one sword Zoro was stuck on the defensive, his skills were good but against 2 furiously striking multi-bladed opponents he was getting cut up by their cat claws

 

‘We have to do something’ Nami says worryingly and she was right: With Luffy sleeping and Kaos both at the other end of the slope and still getting through the damage to his ribs and jaw from Jango’s hypnotic assault her and Usopp were all Zoro had

 

Usopp pulls himself to his feet and aims his slingshot ‘Don’t worry, I got this’

 

**Lead Star**

 

The shot hit it’s target dead on, well it would have had Zoro not moved into the line of fire while dodging one of the brother’s swipes, getting the ball right in the spine, leaving him wide open to an attack

 

‘Oh no I made it worse’ Usopp screams as the brothers lay into Zoro, tearing into him quite badly

 

It was a couple minutes of Zoro mostly parrying the brothers swipes before enough was enough for one Straw Hat

 

_‘Zoro needs those swords’_ Nami thinks before doing something stupid: she runs down the path, around the Meowsan brothers to try retrieve Zoro’s other 2 blades and nearly made it

 

‘Stupid girl’ Jango whispers as Nami fall to the ground with a deep gash in her shoulder, turning she sees the hypnotist spinning one of his chakram on his finger, looking smug until he looked up ‘ **AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!** _Fuck_ ’

 

There standing at the top of the cliff was Klahadore/Kuro, his face a mask of contempt as usual, only the bag he was carrying made his appearance any different than any other day.

 

‘What the Hell is going on?’ Kuro yells, all the Black Cats pale significantly ‘I gave you a perfect plan like all my plans and you stopped by children? Useless!’

 

The Meowsan brothers tense angrily ‘That’s easy for you to say’

 

‘Yeah lounging around in that mansion for 3 years

 

‘We’ve been fighting to survive’

 

Kuro sniffs dismissively ‘That supposed to impress me?’ he asks, getting them madder

 

‘You bastard! Taste our claws of fury!’ they yell and pounce, shredding through… an empty bag? [Oh Shit!]

 

‘My turn’ they hear Kuro whisper, appearing behind them with barely a flicker and before they knew it they were trapped, one wrong move and the katana length blades on Kuro’s gloves would skewer them

 

_‘With his pussyfoot manoeuvre; he could kill us all before we even knew it. He’s just as lethal as he always was, he even still lifts his glasses with his palm to avoid cutting his face, as if the cat claws were always a part of his body’_ Jango panics, an angry Kuro was bad for the survival of everyone on this beach, not just Kaya, Usopp and the Straw Hats.

 

‘But you know what, I’ll give you all one last chance. You have 5 minutes to deal with these children, if you can’t do that, I’ll make sure your insides are on the outside’ Kuro removes the blades from their throats and walks back to the top of the slope ‘Well? Chop, chop!’

 

‘Oh course Captain Kuro!’ Jango yells ‘Men, eliminate them!’ he orders, though is confused when Nami, instead of picking up either of the swords she had been scrambling for, just kicked them at Zoro (much to the green haired teen’s annoyance)

 

‘How about a thanks, you look like you needed them’ Nami smirks, trying to ignore her pain

 

Zoro chuckles slightly ‘Thanks witch. Now’ he turns, getting into a ready stance ‘Let’s try this again, but seriously this time’

 

Shem scoffs ‘You couldn’t beat us with 1 sword’ ‘what makes you think you can with 3?’ Bushi finishes

 

Zoro chuckles ‘With 1 sword I’m only good, with 3 I’m practically undefeatable’

 

‘We’ll see about that!’ the brothers charge… directly into an attack

 

**Tiger Trap**

 

‘What did I just say? My skills with 3 swords are unmatched, you never stood a chance’

 

‘We’re fucked’ Jango mutters to himself as their best fighters fell at his feet having flown through the air over Zoro’s head, until something grabbed his leg

 

‘Captain. Hypnotise me captain, I can take him down’ Buchi blubbered from his position on the ground

 

Kuro’s eyebrow twitched ‘He’s still alive? Not sure if I should be impressed by him or insulting you for doing such a sloppy job’

 

Zoro also seemed surprised ‘Huh? Guess all that blubber was good for something’ then he saw Jango kneeling before the fatter Meowban who then bulked up like the hulk ‘ _Shit! That didn’t happen when he hypnotised himself and Kaos._ Fuck’ he swore before the monster of a mindless cat pirate leap at him

 

 

Seeing an opportunity Nami runs for her captain ‘ _Maybe while Zoro deals with those weirdos I can wake the lazy bum up, we need all the help we can get if Kuro’s as bad as these guys claim’_ she thinks while Jango watches

 

‘Stupid girl, don’t you know when to quit’ he whispers, spinning one of his chakram before letting it fly, heading straight for Nami’s neck

 

‘Come on, get up’ Nami pleads as Luffy continues to snore, unaware of her demise flying towards her… until it’s caught on a _Wakizashi_

 

The sound of metal on metal caused her and the just barely conscious Luffy to look behind her. Kaos was holding the sword straight up, Jango’s hypnotist ring sitting on the guard like it was part of a simple ring game, rather than something that nearly killed their navigator

 

Kaos tuts dismissively ‘Really Jango, the point of having these things on strings is so they don’t go flying and if they’re meant to then the string is pointless. Here, let me show you’ he rotates his blade upside-down so the ring drops before righting it again. The katana’s blade appears to melt before quickly reforming into it’s default Khopesh form, which he then proceeds to spin fast enough for the images to blur together before shooting it at Jango, the hypnotist barely dodging , the blade nicks his forearm before continuing on to leave a hole in the cliff about the size of his head. With what looked to Nami to be a simple flex of his arm muscles the blade was recalled, Kaos catching and stopping it an inch from his eye.

 

‘Glad to see you’re finally finished your damn naps, both of you!’ Nami screeches, the older one ignoring her while the younger isn’t quite conscious enough to even give a shit about whatever words were flowing out of her mouth.

 

‘Both of them are back!’

‘We can’t possibly beat them all in only a minute!’

Kuro’s gonna kill us all’

 

‘Hey Kaos, what I miss?’

 

‘Butler showed up and Zoro had to fight 2 morons, one of which is roided out on Jango’s hypno powers’

 

‘Oh, so not much then?’ Luffy shrugs and the 2 begin walking back to the slope

 

‘Times up, now you will all perish’ Kuro announces flatly, but the sadistic smirk on his face said it all.

 

‘Hey look it’s that shitty butler guy!’ Luffy yells, then groans in pain when Kaos hits him almost as hard as Nami does ‘What was that for?’

‘What’s the point in asking me anything if you aren’t going to listen?’

‘Klahadore!’ Kuro froze and everyone turns, seeing Kaya standing unsteadily at the top of the slope. Like a switch being flipped Kuro went from psychopathic pirate to kind butler

‘Miss Kaya, why are you outside? It could worsen your condition heavily’

‘I’ve heard some terrible things Klahadore, please tell me they’re wrong’ Kaya asks quietly

‘Miss Kaya, all I have ever been is your faithful butler and that is what I shall always be…’

_Click_

‘I don’t believe you, Usopp tried to warn me but I didn’t listen. You hurt Merry, you hurt Usopp and I won’t let you hurt anyone else!’ Kaya yells, her anger obvious on her face, now if only the gun she was holding wasn’t practically vibrating

TBC

LW: Well here we go, shit’s about to get real. Also, hi Kaya. One more chapter and then we move on to the next arc.

By the way, I know Luffy breaking Jango’s chakram with his teeth is kind of awesome and might even count as foreshadowing for the Arlong arc… but I wanted to play with ??????????????? and catching a flying deathring as well as showing off it’s transforming capabilities was the perfect chance, she does love do show off doesn’t she? Real name will be revealed in Loguetown if anyone is curious, and Kaos’ Devil Fruit will be revealed in Arlong Park (I remember someone asking back in chapter 1’s reviews. Hope that answers your question Lammergeier13)

_ Techniques/Lore _

 

Tiger Trap: Zoro puts his hand swords over his mouth blade and swings forth a forward descending slash with them.

That’s taken directly from the wiki as I don’t know what the hell was happening.

March of the Pussywillows: The Meowban brothers leap at their opponent and then repeatedly slash at them with their cat claws.

Lead Star: Usopp loads a lead or pachinko ball into his slingshot and fires it at his enemy.

What? Some are pretty easy to understand, they’re not all weird/confusing

 

Pussyfoot: One of the few high speed techniques common in anime in this series (I believe the other is Soru), with it Kuro can move 100 metres in 4-5 seconds, almost as if teleporting.

 

On an unrelated note I thought I’d clarify something: I’ve pointed out Kaos is tall a couple of times in this fic, unfortunately that means precisely jack shit in One Piece considering the ‘ _normal_ ’ humans can be up to 17 ft tall apparently (O_O thank you Katakuri… also besides having Big Mom as a mother I think he counts as a normal human, I mean he’s not a Long Leg like Smoothie or something is he?) and let’s not even mention the actual giants (Little Garden and Elbaf).

So I’m stating right here his height is 8 foot even, and while I was trying to decide this and compare it to other characters I realised how physically similar he is to Brook, in height and build having a slim (but not skeletal like the Soul King) body plan and taller than most humans, the super perv eventually becomes the tallest Straw Hat at over 9 ft post time skip (Don’t know if either height includes the afro… don’t look at me). If anyone needs a convenient yard/measuring stick he’s between Arlong and Crocodile in size (Arlong’s 7'10" and Croco-man’s 8'3"). Don’t know if that just makes him look huge by East Blue standards or it shows it’s pretty normal once they get to the Grand Line and all their million kinds of insanity.


	7. The Return of Captain Kuro

LW: Okay everyone, who’s ready for a very dangerous cat to be declawed?

Morgan: Oh, oh me I do!

LW: How’d you even… you know what, never mind. Hello little bud thanks for showing up

Morgan: Ren gave directions. So do we start now?

LW: Just need to push the button. Enjoy

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – The return of Captain Kuro

 

Despite having a gun pointed at his head Kuro barely reacted ‘Well it seems you’re all grown up Miss Kaya, ready to take care of your own problems’ he removes one glove and reaches out to her ‘We’ve spent so much time together these past 3 years, even before your parents died, you were more than my master you were my best friend. I brought you shopping, nursed you when you fell ill and we talked for hours on end. We did it all …’

 

‘Klahadore’ Kaya squeaks, her grip loosening slightly

 

‘… and I hated every moment of it!’ Kuro yells, slicing down at Kaya…

 

_Kling Klang_

 

…but another blade weaved its way between the cat claws, stopping his swing

 

‘Hey kitty litter, did ya miss me?’ Kaos asks with a grin ‘Hey Kaya, now might be a great time to run’

 

‘K-k-kaos?’ Kaya stutters

 

Kuro pulls back and frowns ‘Well this is inconvenient but honestly, I’m glad to run into you again, you did leave quite a mark when you struck me. Let me return the favour’

 

Kuro uses his pussyfoot to launch a sneak attack

 

 _‘Hm, that’s interesting’_ Kaos muses before attempting to mirror it as closely as he could. ‘Son of a bitch!’ he yells a minute later, 5 long slash marks across his chest. He was glad his fruit at its current level was able to reduce the damage, even if it still managed to injure him

 

‘Fuck, Bastard’ Kuro grunts as he pulls the knife out of his thigh ‘ _How was he able to do that? Few people can even follow my movements while using pussyfoot, but he managed to actually attack me as well’_ he fumes internally, but with everything else going on his inner anger was starting to show on the outside as well.

 

‘I suppose there is one use for taking a hit like this’ Kuro raises an eyebrow at the boys words

 

‘What?’ he asked, and then the answer hit him…. Right in the back of his head.

 

‘A diversion of your focus’ he answers, Luffy’s arm returning to it’s normal length as the butler lay face down on the ground, quietly steaming.

 

‘Usopp pirates defence manoeuvre!’ the 3 kids yell, jumping out of the forest to slam anything they could onto Kuro’s body, mostly aiming for his head as even they knew head injures are a major issue

 

Usopp pushes himself to his knees ‘What are you doing here?’

 

‘We overheard your plan, plus the tall guy in the funny hat asked us where the North Shore was, so we knew where you were. Then Kaya and the butler went to the same place so we knew something was happening. We couldn’t just walk away, now matter how dangerous it was!’ Onion answers as the trio continue to wail on Kuro

 

‘Kaos, any chance you can save them if butler guy gets up?’ Luffy asks as he begins walking up the slope

 

‘I suppose, shouldn’t be too much of a problem’ he shrugged as the kids run over to Usopp, mostly yelling at him for keeping secrets and hiding things from his ‘ _crewmates_ ’

 

‘Now isn’t the time for any of this you need to run before…’ Usopp stops as Kuro appears behind the kids, looking a little bruised in the face area but otherwise unharmed. The kids scream, but Kuro just walks around them instead using his energy to kick Usopp as far as he could

 

‘That hurt. You people are quite strange, Devil Fruit users I presume?’

 

‘Yep, I’m rubber now’

 

‘I ate one too, not that it’s any concern of yours what it does’ Kaos replies with his near permanent smirk

 

Kuro frowns ‘Jango, I’ll handle these fools, then we’ll have Kaya write me into her will’ Jango sighs but agrees as always

 

Usopp sits up weakly, before turning to the kids ‘Guys you need to get Kaya out of here right now’

 

‘But Usopp…’ Pepper tries to argue

 

‘That is a direct order from your captain! Protect Kaya! Get her out of here!’ Usopp yells, more commanding than they’d ever seen/heard him before

 

‘Yes captain’ the 3 kids replied as one before starting to usher Kaya back into the woods

 

Jango, eliminate the brats and complete the plan!’ Kuro orders, Jango gulps but nods

 

‘Yes captain Kuro’ he says, running after the kids when his leg is hooked, causing him to trip followed by a mace to the back of his head.

 

‘Stay put’ Kaos growls, only to jump back from a strike from Kuro ‘You don’t give up, what’s the angle this time?’

 

‘It’s simple really, either Jango goes after miss Kaya or I do, and I doubt you can stop me leaving as easily as him’ Kuro sneers and Kaos sighs

 

‘Fine he can…wait where’d he go?’ Kaos looks over but Jango had already left

 

‘It wasn’t a suggestion imbecile, but a distraction, I’m sure you’ve been told how easily you get distracted haven’t you?’

 

The fedora wearing pirate rolls his eyes ‘it’s come up in conversation’ he answers, shrugging as if it was unimportant

 

‘It’ll get you kill, that’s all. Buchi! Kill the damned swordsman already’ he yells down the slope, where Zoro was trying to hold back the still hypnotised, hulking Meowban brother.

 

‘Why won’t you stay down? I told you to move!’ Zoro growls as he kicks the brute away, far enough to reach for his others swords

 

**Oni Giri**

 

That finally brought the brother down, and with Jango currently elsewhere he wasn’t getting back up any time soon. This coincides with loud crashes coming from the forest

 

‘Hm, seem Jango’s really tearing up the place, see Usopp it’s only a matter of time before he finds her and we take it all from her’ Kuro grins smugly ‘I suppose you’re welcome to try help her, if you can stand’ he laughs, watching the sniper struggle close to a standing position but a combination of Kuro’s kick and the beating he took trying to hold back the regular Black Cats brought him to his knees again ‘Pathetic, just as I thought’ he sneers but disappears to dodge a **Gum Gum Pistol** aimed at his ribs

 

‘Zoro, Usopp go save Kaya, we’ll deal with Kuro’ Luffy orders, the guys nod and Zoro helps Usopp into the woods

 

‘You children really think you can take me on?’ Kuro asks with a chuckle

 

‘Yeah, we’re going to kick your ass’ Luffy says, cracking his knuckles, while Kaos starts spinning his blade of its cord.

 

‘Then by all means take your best shot’ he sneers but barely dodges a stretched punch from Luffy, getting a cut along his forearm from Kaos in the process

 

**Gum Gum Spear**

 

Kaos sidestepps Luffy’s legs as they fail to hit the former captain

 

‘Damn it, he disappeared again’ he grumbles, before Kuro is once more standing looking smug

 

‘Before I kill you, why are you doing this? This village means nothing to you and yet you’re risking your life for its safety’

 

Luffy grins ‘I like Usopp and Kaya, I’m not gonna let them die today’

 

‘Are you okay with them being the reason that you die though?’

 

‘I suppose, if I were dying today’

 

Kuro scoffs ‘Cocky brat’ before rushing at him with his cat claws. Luffy stretches out his arms and grabs him before springing straight for him, only for Kuro to fling him off, much to the straw hat’s annoyance

 

**Gum Gum Whip**

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

He fires both in quick succession, but both fail to reach his target, even worse Kuro stands on his hyper extended arm, looking highly disinterested.

 

‘This is quite boring; I thought you’d be worth my time after taking out all these weaklings by yourself’

 

‘Cocky bastard’ Luffy growls, Kuro doesn’t respond verbally only running along his arm to attack, but Luffy was right he was overconfident and that costed him when he was blindsided by a kick to the ribs

 

‘Remember me dumbass?’ Kaos grins from Luffy’s side as the rubber boy finally manages to pull back his arm ‘One tracked mind you got’

 

‘These guys are actually laying hits on the captain’

‘Yeah but they both miss more than they hit’

‘Kuro’s got this in the bag, there’s no way these newbies can take him down’

‘Yeah, go Captain Kuro!’

 

‘Shut up!’ Kuro yells as he stands, surprising everyone ‘Don’t ever call me that again! The entire point of this is so I can finally be rid of that name and the life attached to it: Planning each and everyday, for a bunch of morons who care for nothing but causing mayhem wherever they go, being hunted by government dogs and bounty hunters day in and day out. I will end this Hell by days end! 3 years of planning and revising will reach it’s completion and I will soon have wealth and peace do you brats understand?’ he turns to Luffy and Kaos ‘I will not have you stand in my way, not when I’m so close to my end goal’ he runs at them, vanishing as he does .

 

**Dazzle**

 

Kuro powers through the attack, blinking back stars as he attempts to impale the smug fuck, but was surprised when his cat claws imbedded themselves in a boulder

 

Luffy smirks ‘Don’t want a reputation? Then don’t be a pirate!’ he yells, snapping the blades on Kuro’s right glove just before slamming it in the former butlers surprised face ‘All you care about is money, you’re just a greedy son of a bitch’

 

‘Holy crap they broke one of his cat claws’

‘Yeah but he still has the other one. You can do it Captain Kuro!’

‘Kuro’

‘Kuro’

‘Kuro!’

 

‘Enough!’ Kuro yells silencing the rabble ‘I must now deal with you in the only way available to me: Annihilation. Then I’ll remove Jango from the picture as well as any of those brats he failed to eliminate on his own’

 

‘But why kill us Captain? Once Jango hypnotises the girl the plan will work’ one black cat asks

 

‘Idiots, I never intended for anyone who knew my secret to live past this day, it’s problematic that you were unable to complete the simple task I gave you but still you must be removed if my plan is to succeed

 

‘You planned to kill us from the start?’

 

‘Of course. It isn’t enough simply for the authorities to believe Kuro is no more, I must ensure no body can ever reveal my identity to the world, and the best way to keep a secret is to kill everyone else who knows it’ he pushes up his glasses and smirks

 

‘You guys are the most uncool pirates ever’ Luffy complains with a groan

 

‘Plus you’re a dick’ Kaos adds, leaning on the rubber boy as a stand

 

‘If you won’t leave then I guess we’ll have to do this the hard way’ Kuro readjusts his glasses and starts to sway almost drunkenly from side to side, Luffy and Kaos were confused while the Black Cats began to collectively shit themselves

 

‘Why’s he in that position?’

‘Using that against 2 people, that’s beyond overkill’

‘And with all of us here? He could kill us’

 

‘Hey Kaos, any idea what he’s doing?’ Luffy asks, the elder shrugged but also tightened his grip on his blade

 

‘I don’t know Luffy, but if those guys chatter is anything to go on, it’s not good’

 

**OUT OF THE BAG ATTACK!**

 

Kuro disappears, a purple cloud/shockwave passing through the area, an aura of fear filling it

 

‘He’s gone’ Luffy yells ‘What do we do?’

 

An answer didn’t come immediately, mostly because it’s speaker needed to quickly sidestep and in return got his left side shredded, as well as the stone wall behind him

 

‘Shit!’ Kaos swears, panting as the pain burns through him, using his fruit to summon a silver coloured resin looking material, hoping it will hold his wounds closed for the moment, not that he’d ever used it for that purpose. He grimaced as cold shoots up his spine but at least his side resembled a broken mirror or badly healed scars rather than 5 long slashes, still dripping blood. The pirates turned when they heard pained yelps. Luffy seeing some of Kuro’s crew being torn at like Kaos, while others were practically torn apart.

 

‘All power, no control’ Kaos notes and Luffy nods ‘definitely a friendly fire kind of attack’

 

‘His crew were right’ Kaos raises an eyebrow ‘This would be overkill for 2 people’

 

‘Yeah, seems like an army vs one kind of technique’

 

‘Maybe it is, I don’t want to think anyone is capable of that but…’

 

‘…he could be using it to cut down on the witnesses for when this is all over’ his brother finishes the thought and the sentence for him

 

‘Exactly’ Luffy doesn’t look happy, not one bit

 

‘C-c-c-captain?’ one stutters as Kuro returns to a visible speed

 

Kuro smirks ‘Don’t you see, these children’s interference isn’t even an altered course; my plan is still perfectly running along. Soon Kaya will have signed away everything to me, Jango will kill her and then I will ensure no witnesses survive so one person knows Captain Kuro is alive and that’s me’

 

‘Kaos grits his teeth ‘And I presume Jango will meet the same fate as us?’ he asks tensely

 

Kuro laughs ‘Why of course, that secret must die wi…’ his boast was interrupted by a **Gum Gum Pistol** to the face

 

‘ **You bastard! How can you do that, those men are your friends?** ’ Luffy yells at the top of his lungs, so loud even Nami (Currently stripping the Black Cats ship bare) looked in his direction

 

‘Friends? Ha they’re just pawns, meant to fulfil my plans and nothing more’

 

‘No! A crew is the most important thing for a pirate; they’re your friends, your family. You don’t just throw them away!’ Luffy and Kaos charge in, Kuro smirks arrogantly and prepares to dodge. He almost does…

 

‘Ahh!’ he screams, clutching the bloody stump of his right arm, or at least trying to without doing more damage, looking over to see Luffy glaring at him, while Kaos smirks mirthlessly, shifting his grip on the handle of the large khyber knife he was currently using.

 

_ Meanwhile in the forest _

 

‘Hey Onion, is that weirdo still following us?’ Pepper yells back as the 4 keep running through the forest

 

‘I don’t see him, I think we’re good for now’

 

‘We better keep running, but at least there’s no way that guy can catch us in out own forest’ Carrot adds cheerfully, until they hear trees falling

 

‘Come out, little girl I don’t want to make you suffer, but I will if you continue to irritate me’ Jango calls out to Kaya and the Usopp pirates, chopping down trees with just a flick of his wrists, his chakram slicing through several trees before flying back and being caught by the slowly maddening hypnotist.

 

‘Ahh! We’re all gonna die!’ Onion screams until the others hit him

 

‘Be quiet’ ‘He’ll find us if you don’t’

 

‘There are options boys, you come out on your own or I level this forest and eviscerate you all.’ Jango calls to the air, still unsure where his targets were. Luckily he then runs off in the wrong direction, meaning they could continue to evade him for a little while, until Kaya falls against a tree

 

‘Ah Miss Kaya!’ The boys yell in worry

 

‘Sorry, you should probably just go’ she whimpers tiredly, not used to running much anymore

 

‘No, we gave our word we’d protect you and there’s no way we’d go back on it, not with the captain trusting us with something so important to him’ Pepper argues, despite herself Kaya smiles at the loyalty Usopp managed to inspire in these kids

 

‘Oh no her fever’s back, we need a doctor’ Onion panics

 

‘There’s a man trying to kill us, we can’t just magic up a doctor right now’

 

‘But if Kaya gets any worse…’ he’s interrupted by more falling trees and Jango’s loud yelling

 

Kaya sighs ‘You tried your best but you should go while you still can’ she whispers, sitting back against a boulder

 

Onion frowns ‘If we run away now we’ll live to see another day’

 

‘And Usopp did always say to get away if you’re going to lose’ Pepper adds

 

‘Then again, our captain is a liar, and if he’s risking his life for Kaya then he must think he can win’ Carrot argues, getting nods from the others

 

Onion and Pepper nod ‘We swore to protect Kaya and we’re not leaving her, agreed?’

 

‘Agreed!’

 

 

A few minutes later Jango sees a stampede worth of tracks and grins ‘Got yah, _though how I didn’t notice this earlier is astounding, people running in terror are rarely stealthy_ ’ he adds as an after thought until he reached the supposed end of the line ‘There you are’ he thinks aloud before yelling ‘Get out here you brats!’ though the appearance of a white flag did surprise him

 

‘We surrender, we’ll bring you to the girl just don’t kill us!’

 

Jango scoffs ‘You think I’m some kind of idiot, I’m not falling for any of your tricks’ he says before once more being tripped, this time by a rope pulled the 2 of the 3 Usopp pirates ‘ _Ah crap’_ he thinks as he’s ‘attacked’ by the kids, which consisted of pepper to the face (annoying but not too bad) and a flying pan to the groin (Damn! Usopp pirates are vicious O_O), though both appeared to be a distraction for their real attack, jumping off a boulder to bludgeon him like they did Kuro… except it didn’t work, Jango managing to sidestep their attack and grab Onion out of thin air by the throat

 

‘You brats, think you can make a fool out of me!?’

 

‘Jango let them go!’ the yell caused the hypnotist to pause but it wasn’t until he turned that he began to panic: Kaya standing with one of his chakram to her throat

 

‘Now let’s not be hasty little girl’ he stood with his hands up

 

‘You want me dead anyway, might as well hurry things along’

 

Jango grits his teeth ‘I need you to sign everything over to Kuro first’

 

The corner of Kaya’s lip curls ‘Let the kids go and I won’t fight back, I’ll even sign everything over willingly, no need to even hypnotise me’

 

Jango looks thoughtful before pushing up his heart shades ‘You drive a hard bargain Miss Kaya. Just remember if they fight back the deal’s off’

 

Kaya nods ‘I understand, you guys can go’

 

Onion sniffles ‘But Kaya, we promised Usopp we’d protect you. We can’t just abandon you’

 

‘You can if I tell you to save yourselves. So RUN!’ the boys gulp at the strong look in her eyes, then they soften again ‘If I’m meant to live he will save me, but I’m not putting anyone else at risk but me’ the kids heads drop but they run like she said

 

‘You do know Kuro will kill them?’ Jango asks sympathetically, to which Kaya nods

 

‘You know Kuro will do the same to you when this is over?’ she reflects, to which Jango grimaces, he knew it was a possibility he just hoped he was wrong

 

‘Lets just get this over with. Sign the will and everything will be Kuro’s in the event of your death’ he orders, passing her the page and pen.

 

‘Stop!’ both turn as Zoro appears the clang of metal is heard and he stops behind them. Jango frantically searching for wounds … until he hears the branch fall and smirk

 

‘You missed me 3 swords’

 

‘Zoro’s reply worries him ‘You aren’t my target’

 

‘Thanks Zoro, that branch was in the way of my shot. Now… Stay away from Kaya!’

 

**Exploding Star!**

 

The projectile flies, striking Jango in the forehead, creating a small bang and smoke cloud knocking him out, Kaya giving him a couple kicks to the head just to be safe.

 

_ Back with the Captain :D _

 

‘Bastards, do you have any idea what you’ve done?’ Kuro yells down at them

 

Kaos puff his lips and shrugs ‘I think I just cut off one of your arms, but I wasn’t paying much attention. Luffy?’

 

‘You cut off the wrong arm’ the rubber boy replies tensely.

 

‘Well don’t think you’ll get another hit in’ he spits before swaying once more

 

**Out of the Bag Attack**

 

Kuro vanishes once more, tearing up the slope with little to no consistency or pattern to his mayhem

 

‘See it?’

‘Yeah, let’s go’

 

**Traptrix**

 

The man of 1,000 plans stumbles as a rubber arm catches one leg and barbed wire wraps around the other, Kuro unable to respond as in the dust cloud caused by his fall he’s pulled towards the duo, stopping only when his torso reaches Kaos’ open palm and the wires immobilise his limbs

 

‘Let me go!’ he yells in the boy’s face

 

‘Nah’ he shrugs, the wires tightening like vines at the slight tilt of his sword hilt, but then he grins widely ‘Hey do know one thing I’ve learnt I’m really good at?’ he then takes his hand off Kuro’s chest to poke him in the forehead ‘Distractions’ he watches Kuro’s eyes widen in fear or panic he wasn’t sure before leaning to the side…

 

**Gum Gum Bell**

 

… and avoiding a full speed rubber head butt from Luffy, his captain finally unwrapping his legs from the older’s lumbar region (I call it that rather than anything else because ever energetic and twitchy Luffy was kicking him in that section of his spine/back) as Kuro falls, the wire dissolving as Kaos returns it to it’s base form.

 

‘These guys beat Captain Kuro’

‘Not even the marines could do that’

‘Yeah man of 1,000 plans, and they still managed to take him out’

‘What kind of monsters are they?’

 

Luffy finally speaks to them ‘I’m Monkey D Luffy. A pirate only forsakes his name with death…’

 

_Snap **Gurgle**_

 

Luffy’s eyes widen and he turns in panic ‘Kaos, that’s not what I meant! I was speaking phlisophically, or is it metaphorically?’ he rubs his head as Kaos drops the man’s heart.

 

‘He twitched, I reacted. If I’d been closer to his head he might’ve just lost an eye and had his head slammed into the ground’ Kaos shrugged unapologetically, but it was the look in his eyes that resembled a certain Admiral that had the Black Cats pissing themselves and trying to get back to their ship as fast as possible.

 

‘I think you scared them off’ Luffy deadpans ‘Also Nami’s curled up on the beach clutching her treasure to her chest, think we should be worried?’

 

‘Kaos chuckles ‘You might need to be, I’m going to go see if Zoro’s up for day-drinking, we’ve done too much work for one day already’ Luffy chuckles at his brother before going to check on their navigator, he didn’t want there to be problems between his crewmates after all.

 

That Evening

 

Kaya returned to her room at a more sedate pace than would be expected for a day like today, sure she was beyond happy and grateful Usopp and her new friends saved her and stopped Kuro (she couldn’t think of him as Klahadore) she wouldn’t have told Merry to prepare the ship for them if she wasn’t, nor let them spend the night in some of her mansion’s many spare bedrooms, but they would be leaving tomorrow and whether he knows it or not Usopp would be leaving with them. And that was her problem, she knew this was what he wanted, but she didn’t want to loose another person so precious to her, not again. She was so distracted she didn’t realise a boy was sitting in her window until he knocked on the wall.

 

‘Usopp?’ she shrieks as she jumps, when she calms down she looks again ‘Wait, you’re not Usopp’

 

‘Sesese. No I’m not but I’m here on behalf of my captain’ Kaos replies, his smile growing as the blond shuffles closer

 

‘What does he want?’

 

The morning

 

It turned out when there was a good enough reason even Zoro could get up at a reasonable time, and seeing their new ship was definitely a good reason. Merry was happy to give the Straw Hats a tour of the ship, before letting the guys move their supplies and Nami her treasure into the Going Merry. Luffy was quick to claim the figure head as his chair/thinking place (‘Not that he does that often’ Nami jokes and even Kaos cracks a smirk) while his first mate and navigator familiarise with the controls and Zoro napped

 

‘Hey guys, there are 2 proper, private bedrooms, so I call…’

 

‘Those are for me and Kaos, Captain’s order’ Luffy interrupts

 

‘Hey I wanted the damn room so shut up, the lanky bastard doesn’t even look like he cares!’ Nami yells at him with shark teeth

 

Zoro cracks an eye open ‘I don’t know why you’re even caring, you’re the only girl on the crew, whatever room you have is a private room for you’ he mutters, missing the fedora wearing boy’s shit-eating grin

 

‘So is everything ready and to your liking?’ Kaya asks as she stands beside Merry, the man so pleased to see his creation about to actually see so use after so long.

 

‘Yeah it’s great, thanks Kaya!’ Luffy calls down, flashing a ‘D’ grin

 

‘Somebody stop this crazy thing!’ everyone looks up at the screaming to see Usopp rolling out of control towards the docks, on a collision course with the Going Merry

 

‘He’s gonna hit the ship!’ Nami yells

 

‘Not if we have anything to say about it’ Luffy replies nodding to Kaos and Zoro who follow him to the side, the long nose getting stopped then his back found a foot from Luffy and Zoro (to either side of his head) and Kaos’ hands directly above him

 

‘Um thanks guys’ he muttered, Kaos and Luffy laughing it off while Zoro grunts and goes back to finding a good place to sleep ‘ _These guys are odd but really nice’_

 

After untangling himself from his supplies he saw Kaya smiling at him from the gangplanks and smiles back before offering his arm and walking her onto the Merry, it had been quite the unexpected news but he was glad it happened.

 

Usopp had been worried after accepting Luffy’s invitation, this was his dream but it still felt like he was abandoning his friends and Kaya… oh Kaya, he needed to speak to her; he didn’t want to be another person to disappear from her life

 

‘Kaya!’ he calls from outside her window, the blond opens it sleepily

 

‘Usopp? Come in, it’s cold this early in the morning’ she sidesteps allowing him to enter her bedroom where he shuffles nervously

 

‘Listen Kaya, I have some important news’

 

Kaya nods ‘I do too’

 

‘I’m joining Luffy’s crew’ ‘I’m joining Luffy’s crew’

 

‘What!?’ he yells in shock, also confused as to why Kaya had no other reaction to his news than to smile ‘How?’

 

‘Kaos was here earlier, to extend an invitation on Luffy’s behalf. I’m going to be a doctor one day Usopp that’s my dream, so I might as well be the one patching up my friends when they get into crazy scraps’ she smiles teasingly before getting pulled into a tight hug by the sniper ‘Usopp?’

 

‘I was so worried you’d feel I was abandoning you, but to hear you’re coming with us fills me with joy, and a little worry, but mostly joy’ Kaya returns his hug until he lets her go

 

‘We have a few more hours till we set sail Usopp, see you then’ she kisses his cheek and lightly pushes him towards the window, goofy grin on his face as his grapple lets him simply flop out the window.

 

 

Back in the present, Kaya and Usopp were slack jawed at the sheer number of weapons Kaos pulled out and lay on the table; the assortment of blades and small firearms was mind boggling

 

‘What were you saying about pulling an armoury out his ass?’ Zoro grins as he closes Nami’s mouth for her

 

‘Luffy said no, his coat maybe but not his ass’ she replies, Kaos grinning as he can very clearly hear her

 

‘I’m a bit of a hoarder, and a looter, which comes in handy if we’re going to find Kaya a weapons that suits her’

 

‘B-b-but I’m going to be the ship’s doctor, plus you saw what happened with Klahadore’

 

‘True, but we’re not expecting you to stand at the front and charge at the enemy… that’s Luffy, Zoro and my job, but you still need a way to defend yourself’ he then picks up a pair of flintlocks and hands them to her ‘And Usopp can help with your accuracy’ the long nosed sniper nods, Kaya straightens her spine and accepts the weapons

 

‘Let’s do it’

 

TBC

 

LW: Like I said this ‘arc’ was my first real bit of altered canon, both Kuro dying and Kaya joining the crew. Look out for more changes both big and little as the Straw hats pirates are finally on their way to being a real pirate crew.

_ Techniques/Lore _

 

Luffy

Gum Gum Spear: Luffy puts the soles of his shoes/feet together, bends his knees and kicks out toe first. Due to it’s requirements he either needs to be sitting or in mid air in order to use it but oh well.

Gum Gum Bell: Stretches his neck several feet behind him then slams it forward, delivering a devastating head butt. Obviously best used on immobile enemies, as unlike most of his attacks, this one seems to leave his vulnerable while actually using it.

 

Kaos

Traptrix: Sword shift, changing from a Khopesh into a longsword with a bear trap designed hilt/guard, wrapped in barbed wire which can be used to ensnare and immobilise enemies. (Yes it’s named after a Yugioh Archtype, I have 1 or 2 more of those in Kaos’ move pool) (If it helps it’s actual inspiration is understood when it’s rather messy finishing move is known as ‘ ** _Game Over_** ’)

 

Kuro

Out of the Bag Attack: Using his Pussyfoot to it’s fullest extent alongside his Cat claws, the only downside being the trance he goes into means he has no control of idea what he’s hitting, hence why Kaos and Luffy agree it’s a friendly fire heavy kind of move.

 

Usopp

Exploding Star: A ball filled with gunpowder, explodes on impact.

Seeing as I know someone will ask, the certain admiral is Kizaru, old unclear justice himself (which fits given the being Kaos is the OP version of is a true chaotic neutral), usually he’s more Aokiji’s ‘case by case’ kind of neutral but sometimes he embraces the ‘chaotic’ part of his alignment name.


	8. Come Eat At Baratie

LW: Well here we are, the 1st appearance of a very special chef. Enjoy

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Come eat at Baratie

**Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang,**

Kaya fired each pistol before tossing it back, Kaos behind her catching it before replacing it with a loaded one. She may not be hitting bull’s-eyes but she was hitting near the middle rings, better than some of the others on the crew, especially dual wielding

 

‘We need to get you a revolver at the next town, no make that 2’ Kaos comments, Usopp nodding in agreement while Luffy claps madly and yelling about how awesome that was.

 

It was strange how good she was with 2 guns, given she could barely fire with one, only some half joking comments by Zoro and Kaos about balance and symmetry had them pass her a 2nd and once she got used to the weight and handling she took to it like a supersonic duck, the first mate wishing he had more than just single shot for her, but it was cool to see her trick shot in order to ‘ _reload_ ’

 

With Kaya’s training done for the day Luffy returned to his previous work, making their pirate flag. It was a work of sheer genius a Jolly Roger worthy of the next Pirate King…. If only Luffy had any artistic talents.

 

‘So what do you think?’

 

‘What is it?’

 

‘It’s our flag’ Luffy replies with a grin

 

‘Nope’

‘No way in Hell’

‘I could do a better job than that’

‘I’ve never thought about burning a flag before… so let’s throw it overboard’

 

Luffy frowns ‘Well if you can do a better Jolly Roger be my guest’ he grumbles before being pushed aside by Usopp

 

‘Ta da, take at this masterpiece’

 

‘It’s okay I guess… oh who am I kidding this is awesome!’ Luffy cheers excitedly

 

‘And you even remembered who was in charge of the ship’ Zoro teases and he was right: The crews official Jolly Roger was now the typical pirate skull, except it was wearing Luffy’s iconic Straw Hat.

 

A couple hours later after Usopp had painted the design onto the sails and let it dry Luffy was once more bored so tried his luck at using the cannon to destroy a spire of rock sticking out of the water. He was missing by quite a large margin. The rubber boy’s scattershot method of cannon fire irritated the sniper.

 

‘Stand aside, let a pro deal with this’

 

‘Bet you can’t hit it’ Luffy says with a scoff

 

‘Bet I can’ the 2 have a staring contest til Kaos got involved by slamming their heads together

 

‘Shut up and get on with it, preferably before the seas destroys it for you’

 

Usopp straightens up and aims the cannon, focusing for a minute before firing, taking the rock out in one shot

 

‘Awesome!’ Luffy cheers, him and Usopp spin around happily, while Kaos rolls his eyes and smiles at the 2 idiots, until peace was ruined by the yelling of an idiot

 

‘GET OUT HERE YOU DAMN PIRATES!’

 

‘Hey, who are you and how did you get on our ship?’ Luffy asks in confusion

 

‘I’ll show you what happens to pirates who cross out path’ the guy yells as he swings his sword at Luffy, the boy dodging but the angry man still taking out a portion of the railings.

 

‘ _Kaya’s not going to like that_ ’ the captain thinks as he continues to avoid the weirdo’s wild swings ‘Screw it, STOP WRECKING THE SHIP!’ he grabs the guy and flings him at the mast, knocking the wind out of him. It was at this point the others actually decide to see what kind of mess Luffy had attracted this time.

 

Zoro’s eyes widen ‘Johnny? What are you doing here?’ he asks

 

‘Huh? Big brother Zoro! What are you doing on a pirate ship?’ the guy (now identified as Johnny) yells

 

‘Take a wild guess’ Zoro answers with a groan before a thought covers to him ‘Hey wait a minute, where’s Yosaku?’

 

Johnny bursts into tears, telling them how Yosaku had suddenly be struck down with some kind of sickness, teeth falling out, old wounds opening up and general weakness. They had been seeking shelter under a rock formation, when it suddenly exploded, Usopp and Luffy suddenly feeling very guilty

 

‘And now Yosaku will die!’ Johnny cries pointing overboard to where he’d tied his boat to theirs, Zoro tenses and the other 2 turn pale at the thought they may have killed someone.

 

‘Fucking morons the lot of you’ Nami mutters as she shoves past Zoro and Kaos to hop onto Johnny & Yosaku’s ship. From there she began to poke and prod at the guy, even pushing open his mouth and pulling out his tongue as well as pulling back his eyelids

 

‘Hey, show some respect for the dying you heartless witch!’ Zoro yells down at her but she ignores him as would be expected.

 

‘Um, Miss Nami’ Kaya says from ship, her medical bag (which Kaos told her made her look cute, away from the others as neither needed the teasing) held in front of her pelvis ‘While I’m glad you’re sticking your hand in his mouth instead of me I was brought on as the ship’s official doctor’ the redhead blushed

 

‘Sorry Kaya, it’s still new to me, having so many new people around’ the blond waves her off

 

‘It’s fine we’re all like that right now’ she briefly looks over Yosaku ‘I presume you’re trying to confirm your suspicion of scurvy yes?’ Nami nodded

 

‘Yeah and he does’

 

‘Good. Luffy, Usopp get some limes from the kitchen so we can help Zoro’s friend’ the duo nod and run of, returning with the entire barrel, while Zoro, Johnny and Kaos lift him onto the Going Merry ‘Now drip them into his mouth, there we go’

 

It may have been messy but eventually they managed to get enough into the man for him to sit up

 

‘Yosaku, you’re cured! 3 cheers for Big Sis Nami and Kaya’ Johnny cheers as he helps his friend up. The 2 then started bouncing around much to Nami’s annoyance, Kaya’s confusion and Zoro’s amusement

 

‘Well they’re certainly…energetic’ Kaya says, sweat drop on her forehead.

 

‘And crazy to do that so soon after being at Death’s door’ Kaos adds, proved correct when Yosaku is once more on the ground, Johnny following him due to a punch to the head from Nami

 

‘MORONS!’ she screams ‘Johnny was right about you being a deaths door a little while ago, you can’t just get better that fast. Keep this up and you should be back to normal in about… 3 days?’ she shrugs then turns to Kaya who nods in agreement ‘3 days should be fine’

 

‘Thanks big sis Nami’ Johnny wheezes, getting another punch

 

‘So….. Who the fuck are you?’ Kaos asks, Johnny helping Yosaku into a standing position

 

‘I’m Johnny’

‘And I’m Yosaku’

 

‘And together, we’re the most badass bounty hunters in the world’ they announced with epic posing

 

‘Cool, bounty hunters’ Luffy cheers, stars in his eyes.

 

‘Yeah, we used to run with Big bro Zoro, but he left a while back to continue his quest’ Yosaku explains, before with a little swaying keels over once more

 

‘ _Here we go again_ ’ Kaya sighs internally, while Johnny and Zoro move their friend to one of the free beds

 

_ Later _

 

‘We need a cook!’ Luffy yells, summarising the discussion they’d been having for the last 20 minutes (So at least he was actually following it I suppose) ‘But where will we find one on the ocean?’

 

‘I think I know somewhere’ Johnny puts forward ‘The food is like nothing you’ve ever tasted and I’m sure you’ll be able to get someone there to join. But be warned, it’s rather close to the Grand Line’ he turns to Zoro ‘And there are rumours the man you’re looking for passes through on occasion’ Zoro’s reaction is to tighten his grip on Wado.

 

‘Then it’s settled… where is it?’

 

‘The floating Sea Restaurant: Baratie’

 

‘Nami! Set a course for Baratie’ Luffy half orders, the navigator nodding and getting to work

 

 

_ Later… Again _

 

Johnny grins widely as he watches the others reaction to seeing the restaurant for the 1st time.

 

‘It’s a fish’

‘So Cool!’

‘Least they understand what a theme is’

‘Hopefully the food is better than their taste in décor’

‘It is quite a good surprise to see something so nice this far out to sea’

 

‘So, ready to eat?’

 

‘You bet!’ the crew agree, all happy as can be, until a marine vessel almost rams into them

 

 _‘Ah crap’_ Kaos, Zoro and Nami think, Kaya slips in behind Usopp while Luffy is unaffected as he always is.

 

‘Hm, never seen that flag before’ a pink haired marine thinks as he walks over to the side of his ship

 

‘My name is IronFist Fullbody, which of you is the Captain?’ he yells over the side at them

 

Luffy steps forward, Usopp about to follow when Kaya’s arms arounf his waist tighten and instead both step back, Kaos smiling lighting as he slips into position directly behind his captain

 

‘My name is Luffy, we made our flag a couple of days ago.

 

Fullbody chuckles ‘Cute’ then his eyes wander over to Johnny and a once more awake Yosaku, both of whom were trying to stay out of sight ‘Well look at that, a couple of 2nd rate rate bounty hunters finally got themselves captured by pirates’ he laughs, annoying Johnny

 

‘2nd rate! Could 2nd rate bounty hunters take on these?’ he pulls out a stack of posters, most of which being crossed out, though the ones that interested the pirates more were the uncrossed ones that had also fallen out, including:

 

**Nylock ‘ _Smiler_ ’ Morgan**

**Comic ‘ _Bone Daddy_ ’ Century**

**Bartolomeo**

**Wicked Dick** (Getting a small smirk out of Zoro)

**Greyback ‘ _Vampire_ ’ Henry**

**‘ _Sawtooth_ ’ Arlong**

**Nylock ‘ _Dragon_ ’ Grima**

**‘ _Iron Mace_ ’ Alvida**

**Buggy the Clown**

**‘ _Whirlwind_ ’ Zelena**

**Silenceo ‘ _Sniper_ ’ Apep**

**_‘Iron Bunny’_ ** **Afton**

 

‘Oh new update’ Kaos says, snatching the fishman’s wanted poster from Nami’s hand

 

‘Hey! What was that for?’ she asks, surprised when the fedora wearing pirate pulls a binder out of his coat, opening it revealed a similar stack of varied posters, none of which were crossed off. He flicks through them until he comes to Arlong, from a few years back given the 18 million berri bounty, which he crossed off and replaced it for its new total of 20 million. He then returns it to their navigator.

 

 

‘Deal with them quickly’ Fullbody says with a hand wave, the marines loading the canon while he walks away with his date.

 

‘I got this’ Luffy says but is head slapped by Kaos who steps in front of him

 

‘This requires a more directed method, you can deal with the idiots in the crossfire’ he replies, interlocking his fingers and pushing his hands out palm forward, his powers forming something like a dish or hemisphere, then pulls back his pinkies, causing the upper section to bow outwards.

 

**Mirror Wall**

 

The cannonball struck it directly, but the altered shape meant the ball was sent up and over the ship, landing harmlessly in the water. The marines were struck dumb, giving Luffy the chance to jump over to their ship and beat the ever loving shite out of them, while Nami pulled the Going Merry alongside the Baratie, during which Kaos released his ability and Kaya was checking his bruised palms as well as the nicks and grazes on his fingers, scolding him as she did for his ‘stupidity’ and ‘recklessness’

 

_ In the restaurant _

 

Fullbody smiles at his date from across the table, the food delivered and the wine being poured by a blond man in a nice suit. The marine sips the drink before loudly announcing … ah who the fuck am I kidding? I have no idea what BS he spouted nor do any of us care. Sorry.

 

The waiter smirks ‘Sorry, but it’s not’ the turns before anything else can be said as laughter fills the restaurant

 

It was this our pirates enter to, the blond speeding over to them the moment he saw Nami and Kaya

 

‘And what can I do to satisfy the hunger of a pair of goddesses like yourself?’ he asks with a heart replacing his visible eye

 

‘Salad would be nice, but I’m not sure if I can afford such a well prepared dish’ Nami pouts and the blond swoons

 

‘All on the house miladies’ he smiles ‘All you bozos will need to pay in full though’ he turns serious when he turns to the guys

 

‘Then it’s a good thing this is Nami’s treat, free food!’ Kaos cheers with a shit eating grin on his face

 

‘ I NEVER SAID THAT! PAY IT YOURSELF YOU LAZY BUM!’ Nami yells over him

 

‘Don’y care who pays, just bring me meat!’ Luffy yells over them both, annoying the blond

 

‘Luffy may be blunt but he has a point, steak please’ Kaos orders, the others following suit. Kaya picking the lightest thing she could find, while Zoro orders the same as Kaos but with stronger booze.

 

‘Oy waiter!’ it was an annoyed Sanji who found himself once more standing at Fullbody’s table

 

‘I already told you I’m not a waiter’ he sighs then smiles at the blond at the table ‘Well hello darling, how about you come with me somewhere nice and I’ll get you a nice bottle of wine’ she giggles as he turns on the charm, until Fullbody once more draws his attention

 

‘Hey over here! Is bug soup on the menu or did you make if just for me?’ he asks, pointing to the insect bobing around in his soup ‘ _Take that you lousy waiter’_ he smirks internally

 

‘I have no idea, it looks like he’s floating, though it could be swimming or more likely drowning, who can tell with critters like that?’ he smirks and stifled laughter is heard from all the nearby tables

 

‘He’s making me look like a fool’ Fullbody thinks and his anger gets the better of him, slamming his fist into the table and throwing what was left of their meal all over the floor

 

Luffy may be oblivious to almost everything while eating but Usopp and Kaos weren’t, both tensed when Lieutenant Fullbody started making a scene, though even their Captain saw the blond kick the ever loving shit out of the pink haired idiot

 

‘Sanji’ Was shouted across the ship, everyone turning to it’s source: An older blond who might be Sanji’s father, most likely the head chef based on his really tall hat, with a braided moustache and a peg leg (like a real fucking pirate) ‘Fighting with the customers again?’ he grunts, Fullbody smirked until he got the old man’s peg leg to his face as he was kicked out of the restaurant ‘And stay out, you trouble maker’

 

_‘What’s wrong with these people? Serving pirates, abusing their customers….’_

 

‘Lieutenant Fullbody , Gin has escaped!’ A marine yells as he ran to the pink haired marine

 

‘What? How? We haven’t fed him in 3 days!’

 

**BANG!**

 

No answer came as a shot rang out and the marine dropped dead, Fullbody making a hasty retreat as a frail, dark skinned man in grey clothes stumbled into the Baratie

 

‘Welcome aboard ye crook, and how will you be paying?’ Asked a large man with Popeye arms

 

Gin raises his gun ‘You take lead?’ he threatens but the man just frowns

 

‘No money? Well too bad!’ he yells, slamming Gin’s head into and then through the nearby table

 

‘Damn it Patty, that’s the 3rd table this month!’ the head chef shouts angrily

 

‘Gin sits up slowly ‘Just get me something’

 

Patty scoffs ‘Nope, our policy is simple, paying customers only. No money, no food’ while the civilians were cheering the cook standing up to a pirate only the head chef noticed Sanji disappear. After kicking him a few times, probably to make sure he was too weak to knife him in a minute, he picks Gin up, tosses him over his shoulder and throws him out the side door ‘And stay out!’ he hollors as he shuts the door.

 

‘Fuck, if I wasn’t so weak with hunger I couldn’t taken that guy, and then I’d be in there, eating’ Gin thinks/complains his senses dulled to the point he didn’t realise he wasn’t alone out there until Sanji placed the tray right under his nose

 

‘Eat up’ he grunts as he sits against the railing, lighting a cigarette and waiting

 

‘Take it away, I don’t want your charity or your pity’ Gin managed to get out, his hunger and his pride clashing

 

‘ _Idiot_ ’ Sangi scoffs ‘ _This is going to take a while’_

 

 

Luffy comes out just as Sanji gets Gin to eat, the man almost in tears

 

‘Thank you, this food is delicious, I never thought I’d get to eat again’ he sniffles and wipes his eyes before continuing to stuff his face

 

‘You’re lucky he gave you that food, you looked like a goner’ Luffy says with a slight chuckle, not that Gin noticed, too engrossed with filling his belly after so long. He then turns to Sanji ‘Hey Cook Guy, join my crew!’ he says partly asking partly ordering

 

‘I refuse, I’m staying here’

 

‘Well I refuse your refusal. I’ll try again tomorrow. Bye Sanji’ the straw hat cheerfully walks away from the angry blond

 

‘Hey idiot, that’s not how that works’

 

When Luffy returned to the table the others couldn’t help but notice his cheerful demeanour ‘What’s got you in such a good mood?’ Zoro asks

 

‘I found us a cook’

 

‘Yay!’ everyone cheers

 

‘Now I just need to get him to join us’ 3 heads hit the table as the other 4 stare at the Captain. Kaos and Zoro beginning to see a pattern in Luffy picking the most resistant person he could find and wearing them down till they agreed emerging, while for Nami this was yet another ‘ _Luffy you’re a fucking idiot_ ’ moment to add to all the others

 

 

The next couple of days were both good and bad for the Straw Hats and company as Luffy near constantly tried to get Sanji to join the crew, even getting a little help from the old guy Zeff on occasion, on the one hand this was the best food many of them had eaten in a while, but other than Nami and Kaya the others were paying out of pocket, the crews Bisento of a 1st mate knew they could afford it for now, but were going to have to leave before month’s end, for that reason both Kaos and Kaya offered to assist the cooks just in case Sanji proved more stubborn than Luffy, though the purple haired pirate doubted that was even possible.

 

Fortunately for their funds at least, on the 3rd day Gin returned, a bulky grey haired man leaning on him as they entered. While none of the Straw Hats knew him, the chefs did

 

‘Don Krieg!’ Carnie yells, quickly causing a panic

 

‘Please, I need some food. I can pay just bring me something’ Krieg wheezes painfully

 

‘Hey look at him, the great Don Krieg wasting away’ Patty laughs ‘Quick someone call the marines, this is the one chance we’ll ever get’ he yells then throws one of his large arms in front of Sanji ‘And where do you think you’re going?’

 

‘To bring him food dumbass, if they’re hungry they’re customers and he can even pay this time so why are you complaining?’

 

‘Because he’s Don Kreig, we feed him he’ll just destroy everything yo…’ Patty doesn’t finish his insult because he find’s Sanji’s shoe in his face and the wall meeting the back of his head

 

‘Sorry about him, he’s kind of a dick’ Sanji apologises as he places the food in front of the kneeling pirate Commander.

 

‘Thank you kind sir’ Kreig wheezes before practically throwing the food into his mouth.

 

‘Do you have any idea what you’ve done!’ yelled one of the cooks

 

‘Fed a man so he wouldn’t die’ Sanji answers with a shrug, though was unprepared when he was thrown against the wall by a clothesline from Kreig

 

‘That was some good food. I can actually feel my strength returning to me’ he smirks ‘Now there are 100 men still on my ship, they’ll need to be fed next’ he orders, pointing back toward his severely damaged galleon.

 

‘You want us to feed the people who are going to kill us, you think we’re that stupid?’ Carnie asks in disbelief

 

‘I don’t care if you’re stupid or not, you will FOLLOW MY ORDERS!’ Kreig yells, everyone gulp in fear

 

Sanji sighs and pulls himself to his feet, then turns on his heels in the direction of the kitchen ‘Whelp back to work’ he thinks until he walks into Patty’s arm

 

‘And where do you think you’re going?’ he asks tensely

 

‘To get the food’ Sanji answers, the cooks reaction is…. Well to point everything that could even be vaguely considered a weapon at the blond chef, though it wasn’t really necessary as Patty just slams him into the ground again

 

‘You may be Don Kreig, but we wouldn’t have lasted this long out here without a few surprises to keep pirates like you away’ the says as he roots around in a cupboard ‘Sanji may have fed you his slop, but I hope you saved room for desert’ the chef reveals his weapon, a lobster themed cannon/grenade launcher ‘Prepare your stomach for the Meatball of Doom’ he says as he pulls the trigger

 

**_KABOOM_ **

 

‘I might have broken the door, again. I hope Zeff understands and doesn’t yell at me this time’ Patty says with a confident smirk, well until…

 

‘That desert was terrible. You don’t deserve the name chef’ Kreig sneers before he steps out of the smoke, his gold armour on full display ‘Now DIE!’ he orders/yells, guns popping out of everywhere on his armour, not to mention the 2 in his hands.

 

It was pandemonium, every chef (well besides Sanji who was still on the ground) was hit at least once as they scrambled for cover, there were just too many bullets in the air not to.

 

It was the aftermath of this that the captain/ head chef enters, as Zeff exits the kitchen with a large sack of food ‘Here you go, take it and leave’ he grunts, Krieg staring at him in shock

 

‘You’re **_Red Foot_** Zeff’ he gasps

 

‘Who?’ Luffy asks, drawing attention to their group

 

‘A pirate captain who was also the ship’s cook. His name came from his black leg fighting style of crazy strong kicks, his boots stained red with the blood of his enemies after his fights. That man survived the Grand Line for a year’ Gin answers

 

‘And somehow made it back here to this Hell Hole, which I find more impressive’ Kaos mutters, then seeing everyone looking at him continues ‘Surviving a year just sounds like he didn’t make it to year 2. But knowing he spent a year in that sea, got back to the East Blue and set up this place, that’s impressive’

 

Zeff smiles ‘True, but I left that life behind quite a few years back. Now I’m just a simple but highly skilled cook’

 

Kreig chuckles ‘After you lost the leg, you mean? Don’t make it sound like it was just something that came to you one day, it was because all you can do without those kicks is be a cook. I had heard rumours about you losing your greatest weapon, but to see it for myself is actually quite disappointing. The great Red foot Zeff, defenceless’

 

‘What does it matter, I don’t need my legs to cook, only my 2 hands. So what do you want? Zeff asks, knowing there had to be a reason Kreig was so focused on him

 

The armoured man grins ‘You survived the waters of the Grand line and returned intact, I want your logbooks detailing how you did it’ he scans the room before continuing ‘I’ll also be taking this ship, my old one was badly damaged on the journey back’

 

‘No’ Zeff replies shocking everyone ‘That logbook is more than just a record, it’s the symbol of the men and women I sailed those waters with, and as for the ship… I may not be a pirate anymore, but Baratie is my treasure and there is no way I will allow a brute like you to take her from me while I still draw breath!’ as the chef shouts down the most dangerous man in the East Blue, everyone in the restaurant can see how he could be a former pirate, especially one strong enough to take on the Grand Line.

 

‘Well then I’ll just have to take it, and then I’ll return to the Grand Line and conquer it just as I had planned. I had everything I would need: Weapons, ships, men, ambition, all I require is knowledge, and once I get your logs I will build a new fleet, re-enter the Grand Line and become the King of this Great Pirate Era!’

 

Everyone was silent, until Luffy had to open his rubber mouth ‘Hey! You can’t do that, I’m the one who will be the Pirate King!’ he yells, not at all intimidated by the man in full armour, a wearable armoury or diamond knuckle dusters.

 

‘Don’t play games with me boy you don’t stand a chance. Our crew of 5,000 men didn’t last 7 days, that sea is Hell!’ Kreig yells, deciding Luffy was too dumb for anything beyond actually stating the facts to him

 

There was a collective blink as the information took a moment to be processed

 

‘Don Kreig’s fleet’

‘Was wiped out’

‘In less than a week’

 

‘Oh god what did we sign up for?’ Usopp whimpers, his arms wrapped around Kaya’s petrified form,

 

 

‘So as I’m sure you understand, I don’t find your attitude amusing. Continue this foolishness and I’ll have to crush you on the way to the old man’s ledger’

 

‘Just try’ Luffy grins as he cocks his arm back

 

Kreig scoffs ‘Having your way then’ he growls before his shoulder pads open up to reveal more guns

 

_Click_

 

‘Need a hand Captain?’ Zoro asks, hand on Wado while Kaos grins with his blade spinning in his hand.

 

‘Thanks guys, but I think I’m good, can you check on Usopp and Kaya, they’re not looking too good’ Luffy replies with a shrug of his shoulders

 

Kreig chuckles ‘That your crew? Doesn’t look like much’

 

‘Hey, that’s not all there are still 2 others’ Luffy retorts defensively, ignoring Sanji’s yell of ‘Stop counting me’

 

Kreig sighs before lifting the food onto his back ‘I’ll deal with you later, I need to feed my men first’ he then leaves,

 

Gin tried to apologise to Sanji, but both him and surprisingly Zeff waved him off, mostly because the head chef knew he had no control over a man like don Kreig

 

 

‘So Gin, what can you tell us about the Grand Line?’ Luffy asks and Kaos sighs, while Gin turns nearly catatonic for a moment

 

‘That sea makes no sense, it shouldn’t be possible but I don’t have any explanation, how a fleet of over 50 ships can be annihilated by 1 man!’ at this everyone in the restaurant tenses up, not even able to imagine a being that strong ‘The moment he appeared he began to sink out ships one by one, nothing we could do was even able to touch him. If we hadn’t been knocked into the Calm Belt by the storm not even Don’s ship would have survived. I don’t know if anyone else survived, I don’t even want to think about that place, I just want those memories to go away. Those eyes, like a hawks, cold, piercing and remorseless. Even his gaze alone felt like something was walking on your grave’ at this Zoro gasps

 

‘Well then, it appears you boys ran into the man known as ‘Hawk-Eye’. The eyes may be legendary but they’re not proof, though the fact coupled with the ease in which he destroyed your fleet, means it can only be him’ Zeff explains

 

‘Dracule Mihawk’

 

Luffy looks over to his swordsman ‘You know him Zoro?’

 

‘Not personally but yes I know him. Mihawk is the man I’ve been looking for, the Greatest Swordsman in the entire world.’

 

‘That’s a lot of carnage, what did you guys do to piss him off?’ Sanji asks

 

‘Nothing, he just attacked us’ Gin tries to defend himself

 

‘Maybe you woke him from his nap’ Zeff mutters

 

‘Or maybe he got bored and decided to wreck shit’ Kaos adds with a wide grin, worrying a few people (such as Usopp) as to what the eldest Straw Hat would do with Mihawk’s level of power

 

‘This isn’t a joke you damn cook!’

 

‘Calm yourself boy, it’s just an example, as well as a lesson in how the Grand Line works. You’re right about that place being like Hell, but there are still people living there as easily as here in the East Blue. Expect the unexpected, because absolutely anything can happen in that sea’

 

Luffy on the other hand was currently shaking, making some think he had finally come to his senses (oh please) until he jumped up in the air cheering ‘This is going to be so much fun!’

 

‘Looks like I know where I’m going for a change, the Grand Line’ Zoro smiles, but was surprised when he heard the usually cheerful pirate sigh ‘What?’

 

‘Zoro, if you do face Mihawk, don’t expect him to go all out the first time’

 

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

 

Kaos raises him hands in surrender ‘I mean no offence, but let’s put it this way. Mihawk is in his 40’s or so and you’re what 19?’

 

‘So are you, dumbass’ Zoro yells back heatedly

 

‘I didn’t say I wasn’t, but the point is that to him you’re probably just some punk kid with a sword, or 3 in your case. You need to show him you have skill before he’ll actually fight you, that and you can’t let your anger dull those blades of yours.’

 

Zoro scoffs ‘Fine’

 

‘I wouldn’t say anything if I didn’t think you had a chance, you’d kick my ass if I were just a swordsman, and it’s pretty even right now with my bag of tricks as they say’ he grins and Zoro rolls his eyes with chuckles slightly.

 

‘You’re a headcase you know that?’

 

‘Yep’

 

‘Hey idiots, can you shut up for long enough we remember what’s going on. Don Kreig’s flagship is parked outside and he has 100 men or so preparing to take this ship from us. So get in gear!’ Patty yells loudly, waving his oversized fork in the air

 

 

After what felt like only a few minutes loud yelling was heard, alerting the people inside that Kreig’s men were ready and able to fight once more.

 

‘Everyone ready, cause here they come’ One of the cooks announce

 

**_Swipe_ **

 

Just as some of Kreig’s men leave the ship they were shocked and horrified to see it split into pieces, perfect vertical slashes visible as they fall

 

‘Holy crap, What was that?’ Usopp practically screams as they see the carnage from inside

 

‘Don Kreig Sir, the Flagship, it’s been cut’ one pirate shouts as he falls

 

‘CUT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN CUT? WHAT HAS THE POWER TO CUT A GALLEON OF THIS SIZE SO EASILY?’ Don bellows in disbelief.

 

Zeff sends one of the chefs to raise the anchor so they can move in the wave without being dragged under, while everyone else gets out and sees the carnage first hand. It was then they see something that scares even Zeff

 

There, sitting in a tiny one person boat, with green flames candle circling him was the legendary, monstrous…

 

**Dracule ‘ _Hawk-eye_ ’ Mihawk**

 

TBC

 

LW: Well, shit Hawky knows how to make an entrance :D

Also this might be my last OP chapter for 2017, there is a chance you’ll get one more but I may just push it back to the following week. I really don’t know

 

There was only one move that needed explaining as what Hawkeye did wasn’t a technique, it was just proof of how badass and powerful he is.

 

Mirror Wall: The material that usually coats Kaos’ body is extended outward, forming a shield to deflect projectiles, fairly easily manipulated as seen in the chapter, mostly because while it could deflect the cannonball, a head on collision would have been the same as if he just held out his hands in front of him and prayed.


	9. The story of Ol Hawkeye and the thief in the night

LW: Hi guys, this is cutting it very close for a last chapter of 2017, but I hope it makes it. Helps it’s supposed to be a small chapter but who knows when I’m done. Also sorry I’m late, my laptop decided it needed to update itself today/yesterday of all days.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – The story of Ol Hawkeye and the thief in the night

 

So here he is Dracula Hawkeye Mihawk, greatest Swordsman in the world… but we have a couple of other things to deal with and he’s not going anywhere so let’s ignore him for a few minutes.

 

‘Big brother Luffy!’ Johnny and Yosaku yell from the water

 

‘Guys, what happened? Is Merry okay?’ Luffy yelled/asked

 

‘That’s the problem’

 

‘Nami stole the ship!’ the bounty hunters confessed, when they straw hats looked out they could see their ship, sailing away in the distance. Besides the brothers the others were all in varying shades of anger and shock, most severely was surprisingly Usopp, practically steaming that Nami would steal their ship, Zoro muttering about how they should never have trusted that bunt and Kaya was frozen, not able to understand how Nami could stab them in the back like that. Once some of the shock had passed the bounty hunters were quickly pulled onto Baratie.

 

‘How?’ Luffy asks, the duo blush and mutter, making the others assume she used seduction (Kaos thinking she just flashed them her tits and pushed them overboard) before the eldest sighed

 

‘Shall I go after her?’ Kaos sighs, twirling his blade in its dagger form, something the newer crew maters were beginning to think was some kind of nervous tic.

 

‘You sure? The ships pretty far’ Luffy’s worry clashed with his desire to have his navigator returned, Kaos’ response was to ruffle his hair

 

‘Silly Monkey, I know my limits and I’ll be fine’ he grins even if he wasn’t as confident inside ‘ _Okay so maybe I don’t know my limits and that ship is moving faster than I would have liked but oh well, better hope Nami didn’t slip away to change or the girls just leave their underwear all over the place_ ’ he sighs and the spinning penknife slashes open his palm, but he just runs, hops over the railing and dives in.

 

‘Straw Hat!’ Zeff yells as he hobbles towards the group

 

‘Hey old guy, it’s Luffy by the way’

 

‘Don’t care. Why did you let that guy jump?’

 

‘Cause’ Luffy answers, getting a kick to the knee ‘Ow!’

 

‘Listen kid is he or is he not a Devil Fruit eater?’ Zeff asks

 

‘Yep, me and Kaos got our fruits practically the same time’ Luffy grins and this time gets kicked in the face

 

‘What does it matter? Let the weirdo go for a swim’ Sanji contributes as he lights a fresh smoke

 

Zeff practically explodes ‘It matters because that young man just killed himself! Anyone who eats a Devil Fruit loses their ability to swim’ shocking most of the people within earshot

 

Big bro’s dead?’ Johnny sniffles

 

‘He’s fine’ Luffy grins, leaning over the rail

 

‘What are you talking about?’ Zeff asks

 

‘Look over there’ Luffy points at the mysterious sparkling flakes floating in the water ‘That’s how I know’

 

Zeff wasn’t convinced ‘Explain’

 

‘If it makes a reflection he can make it a mirror, if it’s a mirror he can bend it to him will. It’s one of his cooler abilities, his mirror gate’

 

Zeff’s eyes widen ‘He ate the Mira mira no mi?’ he asks, to which Luffy shrugs and scratched his head

 

‘Honestly I haven’t got a clue, I wasn’t really paying attention back when we first learnt, Hell I only know mine because Shanks told me back when he was trying to get me to cough it back up’ he admits, causing Zeff to sigh in annoyance.

 

_‘Idiots, well at least nothing else can go wrong’_ he thinks, the universe showing it’s contempt in about 5 seconds

 

**Bang! Bang! ping**

 

‘What, I missed, but how? I aimed right for him and it’s practically point blank’

 

‘You probably did, he just deflected it with his sword’ the straw hats hear Zoro say and turn to see the swordsman was now on Krieg’s ship, explaining how the other guy had _missed_ Mihawk.

 

Zoro steps forward with a smirk ‘I’ve never seen a sword handled with such grace, especially not one that size’ he comments, Mihawk simply shrugs

 

‘A sword wielded with force alone is weak’ he says evenly, only his eyes moving to focus on the green haired man

 

‘Fight me!’ Zoro yells ‘My goal is to be the world’s greatest swordsman, so I will beat you’

 

Mihawk tilts his head ‘And why should I accept?’

 

Zoro puts on his bandana ‘You said yourself you’re just in the East Blue due to boredom, I’m the best swordsman in East Blue, I’m the closest thing you’ll find to a good fight around here’

 

Mihawk’s lips curl ‘Very well’ he reaches for his cross pendant, revealing it to be a small dagger

 

‘Are you kidding me?’ Zoro growls but tries to hold in his anger, instead focusing on drawing blood from the greatest swordsman

 

‘You don’t kill a fly with a cannon, for that same reason this will be good enough for you’ he holds out the knife as Zoro rushes him

 

Everyone watches in near silence as Zoro’s 3 swords flurry is easily parried by Mihawk’s tiny blade, the older man not even breaking a sweat while Zoro appears to be losing his cool

 

‘ _He’s beating me with a toy! There can’t be this much of a gap, he can’t be this much stronger_ ’ he thinks as he takes a half step back to launch his signature attack

 

**Oni-Giri**

 

And everyone sees why Mihawk is the greatest when Zoro’s best technique is stopped when he stabs just where the 3 blades meet, stopping them dead.

 

‘Big Bro!’

‘This can’t be happening’

‘Fight for real Zoro!’ Johnny and Yosaku yell encouragement while Zoro tries his hardest to fight back

 

Mihawk sidesteps and Zoro’s tries once more just to hit the man, but he continues to miss or more often be parried by the cross knife. Eventually fatigue started to set in and Zoro began to get sloppy in his swings, Mihawk not even really having to try to avoid them. Seeing he was nearing his limits Zoro put all his energy into one final strike.

 

**Tiger Trap**

 

Once more the attack is stopped by Mihawk, but this him he finally counterattacks, thrusting the knife into Zoro’s chest

 

‘Why don’t you back down? Why do you keep fighting?’ Mihawk asks curiously

 

‘I can’t really explain it, but I feel I’ll lose something important if I take even 1 step back’ Zoro replies tensely

 

Mihawk smiles slightly ‘ _This boy might just get there someday_ ’ he thinks before sheathing his dagger and reaching for his Cross-Sword ‘You have managed to sate my boredom like you said swordsman, so you have earned the honour of falling by the strongest sword there is. But before Yoru ends this duel, tell me your name’

 

Zoro’s grin looks practically feral/demonic ‘Roronoa Zoro’ he answers

 

Mihawk hums, taking the black blade off his back and pointing it at Zoro ‘Now this ends’

 

**_3,000 worlds_ **

 

The 2 clash and pass each other, for a moment things look evenly matched for the 1st time in the entire fight… until both the swords in Zoro’s hands shatter, only Wado surviving the encounter

 

_‘I have so far to go, but I’ve finally seen true greatness Kuina and I will get there’_ Zoro thinks, sheathing Wado before turning to Mihawk who raises an eyebrow at the boy’s open stance ‘Scars on the back are a swordsman’s shame’ he answers the unspoken question

 

Mihawk actually smiles at that ‘You are an interesting one, I didn’t expect to find someone like you in the weakest Blue. Now if I must’ he swings Yoru once more, tearing easily through Zoro’s torso and knocking him into the sea (Open wound plus salt water… SHIT!) Hawkeye having a moment of peace before…

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

…he was forced to dodge a rubber missile, it was a simple task for someone like him but it still annoyed him slightly, though was slightly amused by the fact his ‘attacker’ managed to get his head stuck in the ship wall.

 

‘Your friend will survive’ Mihawk says surprising Luffy, but he smiles when Johnny and Yosaku surface with Zoro and give him the same statement. Seeing the green haired teen was conscious (albeit barely) he makes one more announcement ‘It is much too early for you to die boy. You are weak but you have potential. Surpass this blade and then surpass me, Dracule Mihawk. That is your goal Roronoa Zoro.’ those words put a fire in Zoro’s eyes as he lifts his remaining sword

 

‘Luffy! You there?’

 

‘Yep’

 

‘I swear on my honour as a swordsman, until I beat Hawkeye, I will never be defeated again. Will that satisfy you, Pirate King?’ he asks tensely, the others (Particularly Kaya and Ginseng) worried he was aggravating his injuries

 

‘Of course Zoro’ Luffy replies, flashing a D grin.

 

Mihawk looks amused by the exchange ‘Pirate King? Your dream might be even more difficult than Zoro’s’ he says

 

‘Yeah well that’s my business’

 

‘ _Shanks was right, he is an interesting kid_ ’ Mihawk smirks before he hops back into his boat, just as boots his the wreck he just left

 

‘Hey Hawkeye, weren’t you here to take me out? Kill the ruler of the East Blue Don Kreig?’ the armoured man yells

 

Mihawk shrugs ‘I considered it, it was one of the reasons I went this far, but I’ve had my fun and honestly I can’t be bothered to deal with an insect like you. Farewell, I’m going home now’

 

‘You may be done but I’m not’ Kreig sneers before revealing his arsenal ‘Go ahead and die!’ he yells fireing everything he had at Mihawk

 

_‘Morons never learn’_

 

The resulting explosion tore apart a lot of the galleon’s remains, Luffy just about getting back to the Baratie before his section sank. Safe for the moment he turns to his crew

 

‘Johnny, Yosaku, Usopp, go after Nami and Kaos, see where she’s heading, we’ll catch up later. Kaya, do what you can to patch up Zoro, I’ll deal with these dickheads and join you when I’m done’ Luffy orders, everyone nods, the blond moving the swordsman onto the restaurant roof (probably the safest place for him), while Usopp got onto the bounty hunter’s boat, vowing on his honour as a brave warrior of the sea … and then on his long nose at Luffy’s unimpressed look, that they would find Nami and bring her home.

 

With that out of the way Luffy turns back to the Kreig pirates before yelling ‘Don Kreig! I’m going to kick your ass!’

 

TBC

 

Yeah this is shorter than usual, but I did plan to just write Nami stealing the ship and Zoro’s fight with Mihawk.

 

So we’re getting closer to revealing Kaos’ DF, just another arc to go. I actually have the reveal written out, and my writing as reached Loguetown, so don’t worry about me stopping in the near future, it’s full steam ahead for this series. J

 

Just to clarify, it’s not the Mira Mira no mi as Charlotte Brulee owns that, it’s something of a similar kind but a separate tier, like Ace/Akainu, or Monet/Alkoji, don’t know which is higher but oh well that’s years away at the very least. I will admit it was my first choice of name, but then I remembered the wicked witch of Toto Land and was like _‘Shit!’_

 

One last thing, seeing as Kaos mentioned Nami flashing the bounty hunter duo and considering how big she gets I decided to see what size she was at this point. Apparently she’s an I cup by Thriller Bark and a J after the 2year time skip, but nothing like that for her East Blue stats, all it has is (34"-22"-34"), and I’m not that stretchy guy in Flash (Gomu Gomu no douchbag) so it means nothing to me.


	10. Battle for Baratie (part 1)

LW: So here we go, invasion of the Kreig pirates, without a Mihawk interruption this time.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Fists, Feet and bullets; Battle for Baratie (part 1)

 

‘Men, get that ship! Once it’s ours everything will be perfect, no more having to fake being marines or surrendering, we just float over to them and open fire, every battle won with a sneak attack’ Don orders with a laugh

 

‘Yeah, nobody would ever believe such an unintimidating ship could be a dangerous pirate vessel’ one of the crew agrees

 

‘But Don, what if when we go back to the Grand Line we run into someone like Mihawk again?’ another asks fearfully

 

**BANG**

 

The pirate’s body drops from Kreig’s shot to the head ‘Thanks for the feedback, anything else?’ he asks, waving his gun around and getting fearful headshakes from the rest of them ‘Good. Do you think an ordinary man could cut up our ship the way Hawkeye did? He must have eaten a Devil Fruit, while rare and almost legendary out here in the Blues, the Devil Fruits are quite common along the Grand Line. He must have used some weird ability to cut the ship to ribbons. Out there these powers aren’t anything special, even that rubber dumbass will be seen as normal’ he argues, badly [Honestly I kept this in mostly as is to prove Don Krieg… is an idiot. ‘Sir what do we do it we run into Mihawk again?’ ‘Nothing to worry about, there are tons of people just as dangerous as Mihawk, he’s nothing special’ Fucking idiot] ‘But once we have Zeff’s logbook we’ll know just how to handle those freaks as well as how to find the One Piece. So get moving!’ he commands again, the crew finally beginning to move

 

‘Oh no you don’t’ Patty and Carnie yell as they jump into the…?... but fumble around on the controls as neither really knew what they were doing.

 

Sanji sighs around his smoke ‘This ship is about to become a battlefield. Hey you’ he points to one of the chefs ‘Go inside and open up the fins’

 

‘What but then Kreig’s pirates will be able to swarm us’

 

‘But it will also allow us to fight them outside the restaurant, and keeping them out is the most important thing’ Sanji argues, and the chef follows through after an approving nod from Zeff.

 

Luckily the chefs had a little more prep time than they expected as Luffy chuckles to himself ‘Here I come’

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

**Gum Gum Giant Scythe**

 

Springing off the restaurant he slams straight into/through the wave of Kreig’s men, tossing them into the sea as he grabs a hold of a still intact mast

 

‘What kind of freak is he?

 

‘ _Damn, and the Grand Line is full of people like him?_ ’ Sanji thinks

 

‘So, just to be sure we’re clear, you’re attacking this boat which just gave you food? I’m kicking your ass purely on principle in that case’ Luffy says from his higher vantage, while Kaya sighs hidden away.

 

‘So you really want to fight me out here on the water, where even a slight misstep will kill you when you fall into the water? It seems the fruit of yours took your brain along with your ability to swim’

 

Luffy shakes his head ‘No just the swimming, but in exchange I’m stretchy’ he grins widely, just as the Baratie fins open out.

 

Sanji steps onto the fins with his usual swagger ‘Now we have somewhere to stand we cooks will proudly defend this ship with our very lives’ he states, getting into a ready position, the other cooks following him.

 

‘Nice of you to bring out all this extra decking, means I won’t damage my new ship while I kill you all. Because it will be my ship and I will kill all of you, it’s just a matter of how quickly you die’ Kreig sneers

 

‘Not likely’

 

‘We’re battlecooks!’

 

With a hiss the fish head on the end of the Baratie separates from the ship, revealing it to be part of a smaller vessel, currently being piloted by Patty and Carnie

 

‘Mackerel Head One, the Baratie’s secret weapon. Run away now or things won’t be so pretty for you guys’ Patty yells before the 2 cooks start firing on the Krieg pirates, to the loud cheering of their companions, until they tried to fight Kreig directly, the cannon fire basically bounced off him and he lifted the fish boat over his head and tossed it aside, the only reason it didn’t crash through the Baratie itself was Sanji’s lightning fast reflexes and an extremely strong kick.

 

With their heavy support wrecked it was easier for the Krieg pirates to get onto the decking and bring the fight to the cooks, who while they were good cooks and at really put their all into the fight… were simply out matched by what was left of Don’s crew.

 

‘You may think you’re good fighters but we’re the legendary Krieg pirates, the best in the East Blue and one day the best in the world’ one of the pirates sneers at the beaten cooks

 

Kreig chuckles ‘Let it be known this stupidly designed boat is already the property of the Pirate Admiral Don Krieg’ he announces

 

Sanji chuckles ‘Yeah that’s never going to happen, this restaurant still belongs to the old geezer and you’ll have to pry it from our cold dead hands before that changes’

 

The blond’s firm stance as well as the 2 oldest chef’s return to the fighting gave the cooks a needed boost to moral as they pulled themselves off their asses to hold back Krieg’s men, and they were doing okay until…

 

Ping, Ping

 

Something managed to one shot Carnie and Patty, knocking them both to the ground, the cause being the weirdo who just swam to the fin

 

‘I am the invincible Pearl, in all my time as the Don’s no.3 I’ve never shed a drop of blood in battle, as is the strength of my armour’ a large man in pearl centred shield armour boasted, laughing arrogantly

 

**Bang** - _cling_ **Bang**

 

Kaya double tapped with her twin pistols, one glanced off the shield on his arm, but the 2nd embedded itself in his shoulder, the man shakily bringing his hand to the would and then his face

 

‘B-b-b-blood? Ahhhhh!’ Pearl screams, then begins banging his shields together frantically

 

‘Pearl calm down, you’re wreck my ship!’ Don Krieg orders, the cooks confused until the drumming man erupted into blue/white flames

 

‘Oh crap he’s on fire’ Luffy yells, having bounced back to the Baratie to avoid the flail Kreig had pulled from his endless arsenal

 

‘Did I make things worse?’ Kaya asks sadly

‘Of course not Kaya-Swan, you put that Pearl in his place’ Sanji swoons ‘Now I need to take this freak show down’ he says more seriously

 

**Fire Pearls**

 

Zeff’s expression barely changes to just swings his peg leg like Luffy using whip, the blast of air extinguishing the flaming pearls, causing them to fall harmlessly to the ground

 

‘But, my unbeatable Pearls’

 

‘Don’t send your kid stuff to me, I’m not as much of an invalid as you think I am you know?’ Zeff mutters

 

‘Hey moron!’ Pearl turns ‘This is for trying to kill the old geezer’ Sanji yells as his foot connects with Pearl’s unprotected face, (Seriously, why didn’t he have something to protect his face? And why to nobody think of hitting him in the face?) knocking him into the water ‘Well that’s one idiot down’

 

‘Sanji’ the blond turns ‘Just give up, I don’t want to hurt you or the old man but I will if I have to’ Gin says tiredly, his gun pressed to Zeff’s head and his boot on the old man’s spine.

 

**_Click_ **

 

In a move that surprised both of them (Sanji didn’t even know any of the cooks carried) Gin had 5 pistols pointed at his head, not counting the 2 Kaya had pulled from her bandolier Kaos lend her till they could find her some multi-shot firearms.

 

‘You even try hurt Zeff you’ll be painfully reminded humans are deathly allergic to lead’ Carne may not have a gun on him, but that didn’t make his statement any less true

 

‘Gin!’ Krieg yelled ‘Take out the old geezer!’

 

‘Shut up!’ the armoured man was surprised anyone would talk back to him, but it seemed to be happening a lot today, Sanji then turned back to Gin ‘Gin, do the smart thing and point that gun over here, I’m not letting you take this ship from the shitty geezer, if you bastards want it or him so badly, you’re going through me first’

 

Gin grimaces as he puts his gun away ‘I really don’t want to do this’ he sighs, slowly pulling out his cannonball tonfas ‘But the captain wants this ship so he’s going to get it, and if that means going through you then so be it’

 

‘Great, you’ll be fine Sanji, I’m going to handle the weirdo with the funny shaped head’ Luffy grins, appearing to have already forgotten his opponent’s name

 

‘You brat’

‘Show some respect for Don Krieg’

‘Admiral of the greatest pirates in the East Blue’

 

Luffy shrugs ‘Nah, don’t want to’

 

Gin’s cold stare met Sanji’s heated one as he began to spin one of his tonfas till it was nearly all a blur, at which point he charged at the cook, Sanji trying to land kicks but failing, though luckily managing to avoid the slam of the cannonball that would have most likely crushed his hand, there was a noticeable sway back and forth, neither really getting any clean hits on the other until Gin managed to surprise him and slam the bar into his throat just before pinning him to the deck with it.

 

‘I told you this would happen, but you just wouldn’t listen, you fought back anyway. So now we reach the end of the line’ he says quietly, spinning his free tonfa in preparation, bringing it down right until Sanji spits his cigarette in his face, distracting Gin enough he was able to free himself and give the Krieg commander a swift kick to the back of the head, causing him to headbutt the deck, the problem for Sanji was Gin was tougher than he looked, meaning he was able to swing his tonfa into the cook’s ribcage before falling over, bringing the both of them down almost simultaneously.

 

‘Shit, that guy managed to kick Gin in the head’

‘Think he’s still alive?’

 

An answer was deemed pointless when Gin pulled himself back up, followed more slowly by Sanji

 

_‘Well that’s at least a rib, maybe 2’_ he thinks to himself ‘That the best you got Gin, if so I don’t know why they think your so scary’

 

Gin apparently didn’t find Sanji’s humour amusing if the 2 more rapid strikes to his chest were anything to go on, the cook now fairly sure most of his ribs were fucked at this point

 

‘Goodbye Sanji’ Gin says as he prepares a final blow, setting the cook off

 

‘Hey, what was that?’ he yells as he manages to barely dodge, before planting his foot in Gin’s face ‘Was that pity? I’m not dead yet yah dick’ he pulls himself to his feet, but stumbles ‘ _Yep, that’s probably all of them_ ’ he thinks as he falls.

 

His worsening injuries were how Gin was able to pin him by the throat, while the why was most likely because even if he was in better shape than Sanji at this point, Gin would rather not be kicked in the head again. There was a collective intake of breath as the 2 remained frozen there Sanji not even struggling in Gin’s iron grip, though Krieg’s wide grin said exactly what he was expecting.

 

Tears were unexpected, but low and behold there they were, the cold hearted demon Gin was crying ‘I can’t. I can’t follow this order. This man saved my life, I can’t end his. I’m sorry Don Krieg, but I can’t kill Sanji. I won’t!’ he yells, shocking everyone and most likely adding more fuel to Krieg’s anger

 

‘WHAT DID YOU SAY?’ Krieg screams back

 

‘I’m only here because this man showed me kindness when he didn’t need to, because he showed me compassion. I’ve followed you from the start Don, been your loyal commander but now I have a problem, I would never be able to live with myself if I killed this man, but I can’t defy my captain, please Don, let me disobey’ he sniffles ‘We could just go, leave the restaurant and…’

 

‘DID YOU JUST TRY TO GIVE ME AN ORDER?’ Krieg yells over him ‘After all this time you decide to turn traitor on me, because of feelings like compassion, disgusting. It appears I’m going t have to deal with these maggots the hard way’ he grunts as he rips one of his shoulder guards off and grips it like a shield ‘Men, get out of the way’ he orders and the ‘mouth’ of his roger on the shield opens up, all the krieg pirates knowing exactly what their captain was about to unleash

 

Gin pales ‘No, not the gas!’

 

‘He’s going to use the MH5!’ one of the pirates in the water yells

 

‘We’re all gonna die!’ yells another, as the rest scramble for their masks

 

Kreig chuckles to himself ‘All the matters in a fight is who wins, how I get there means nothing to me’ he smirks arrogantly then sneers when he sees Gin reach for his jacket ‘Don’t you dare put on that mask Gin, your treasonous acts deserve the death sentence, so you can join these cooks in the MH5 and be done with!’

 

Luffy scowls ‘I’m not going to let you do this’ he yells, running at the man

 

You don’t have a choice’ Kreig replies, revealing that like everything else in his armour it comes with guns, in this case the entire outer rim functions as a machine gun, the pointed tips not exactly something Luffy wants to test his rubber bullet resistance against. As he retreats

 

_‘Crap that could have been bad’_ he thinks then sees Gin staring at his mask ‘What are you waiting for, put it on! You don’t have to listen to that dickhead, especially once I’m done kicking him ass’ Luffy yells at the pirate before getting ready for a 2 nd attempt

 

‘No! My captain can’t be defeated; he’s the strongest man alive. If this is my punishment then so be it’ he sighs in resignation and drops the mask (Hey Gin, there’s this guy called Edward Newgate who’d like a word with you… He also goes by the name Whitebeard, Strongest Man Alive, and could break Krieg in half in 5 seconds)

 

‘At least you know how to die with some honour intact Gin, but you’re still all dying today. MH5, poison gas attack, Fire’ The shield cannon fires releasing the poison bomb as the golden pirate grins, cooks flailing for the water, Krieg pirates watching from behind their masks and Patty&Carnie hurrily dragging Zeff into the restaurant where they were at least slightly safer than out in the open.

 

Things were finally looking up for the Kreig pirates, until rubber hands wrapped around 2 of their heads and yanked their masks off ‘Hey guys catch’ Luffy yells as he throws them at Gin and Sanji ‘Okay now to get one for…. Shit where’s everyone gone’ he panics when he sees the others had dived, half to get away from the rubber boy but also to get out of the bombs blast radius _‘FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!’_

 

**BANG**

 

TBC

 

LW: Well if I’m given a cliff-hanger I might as well take advantage of it.

Sorry it’s so short guys, turns out this arc bores the fuck out of me, I think it’s that besides being a heavily armoured dickhead, Krieg is really uninteresting. Hopefully this will be over soon. Until next time J.


	11. Battle for Baratie (part 2)

LW: Well here we go, time to kick Kreig’s ass

 

Rubber Kings and Mirror Master – Battle for Baratie (part 2)

 

**BANG**

 

‘ _Finally that rubber brained idiot is gone, now I can simply take the ship for myself and re-enter the Grand Line_ ’ Kreig thinks to himself as he grins widely.

 

‘Luffy’ Kaya squeaks fearfully, her and Zoro were luckily safe above the gas cloud which hung like fog on the lower levels

 

‘He’ll be fine’ Zoro mumbles before coughing violently ‘The Captain’s too stubborn to die, too stupid for his body to know poison is bad either’ he jokes weakly, Kaya rolling her eyes but thankful for the attempt anyway.

 

 

‘Hey asshole!’ was heard just before a fist shot through the fading gas and slammed into his face, causing him to stumble as he quickly righted himself ‘I’m not dying today’ Luffy yells from behind his gas mask ‘ _Lucky that mask just appeared when it did or I’d be in pretty bad shape_ ’ he almost smiles until he hears a commotion behind him

 

‘Gin, let go you asshole, the gas is gone you can get off me’ Sanji struggles to get the former commander off of him but he was still weak due to his injures, though upon further inspection Gin was the worse off of them both: blood dripping from his nose and gums, eyes bloodshot and barely open, his breath was ragged and came out in barely a whistle

 

‘Gin! This mask was yours’ Luffy gasps, shocked at the man’s self sacrificial act, and pissed off when Krieg started to laugh and berate him

 

‘Patty get Ginseng, he has to do something!’ Sanji yells at the Popeye like chef who mumbles excuses but runs off to find the ship’s doctor

 

‘Put the mask on him, it’ll help detoxify his lungs and might give him a little more time for the doc to work on him’ Zeff orders, Sanji nods as the straw haired man with a handlebar moustache exits the ship and with Patty’s assistance brings Gin up to the roof with Kaya and Zoro, the girl quickly getting to work helping however she can.

 

Luffy’s jaw clenches ‘Now I’m mad Krieg, you won’t like what’s coming for you’ he practically growls, none of the fun loving idiot any other others had seen up until now was visible in this kid.

 

‘Idiot, attacking head on is a mistake he’s strongest that way’ Sanji argues to Luffy ignores him

 

‘So am I’ he whispers then takes off running ‘Hit me with your best shot!’

 

‘Anger makes you sloppy kid, you’re running in one direction… to your death’ Kreig sneers as he tosses bombs into Luffy’s path, causing a smoke cloud and a pillar of water which he then proceeds to empty an entire round of bullets from his gattling shield into

 

‘Well he’s dead’

‘Never stood a chance’

‘Kid no!’

 

The water fell and Kreig grimaced when he sees Luffy still charging

 

**GUM GUM…**

 

‘Just try it kid’ Krieg yells, wrapping himself up in a spiked cloak…

 

**PISTOL**

 

… which Luffy practically ignores as he continues his attack, slamming his fist into the cloak and Krieg’s face, this time knocking him to the ground.

 

‘He floored the Don’

‘In one hit’

‘What kind of monster is this guy?’

 

‘So you think this will kill me? Little spikes?’ Luffy’s voice was both angry and also slightly condescending, not wavering even as he rips the spikes out of his flesh and tossed them across the deck ‘It’ll take a lot more than that to take me down, I’m the future King, so small fry like this won’t work on me’ his smile was humourless as he tore the last spike out of his leg, just above his knee

 

 

‘Well he’s completely insane’ Sanji says with a sigh, not seeing Zeff nod in agreement

 

‘ _True, but so was his predecessor._ I’ve seen a few men like him in my day, stubborn as the Red Line, would rather die and walk away from a fight. Glad he’s on our side though, as that stubbornness makes them Hell to fight and even harder to kill’ the old chef replies, hoping it wouldn’t come to that, Luffy may be a pain in the ass kind of a moron and definitely crazy, but he was growing on the former pirate cook.

 

Eventually Krieg manages to pull himself to his feet, his face stuck in permanent scowl ‘So you’re not dying today huh kid? That’s too bad, because one of us is going down today. And while I’m here, I might as well pay my respects’ he yells, slamming his shield into Luffy before blasting him ‘Go to Hell!’

 

Luffy bounces away from the blast, catching Krieg’s shoulder pad with his foot and pulling him back ‘You first’ he orders, knocking the pirate admiral onto his back.

 

‘How is this possible?’

‘This kid is kicking the Don’s ass’

‘What are we dealing with?’

‘Did Mihawk kill us and we’re trapped in Hell or something?’

 

Luffy just grins widely, despite everything he was kind of enjoying the fight.

 

Zoro and Kaya smile as they watch the fight ‘See girlie, nothing to worry about’ the swordsman smirks, getting a light smack to the shoulder from the blond

 

‘Shut up, you thought he was a goner too’ she retorts, chewing her lip in worry. Luffy was winning that much was true, but he hadn’t won yet.

 

‘EVERYONE SHUT UP! NEVER DOUBT DON KRIEG!’ Krieg yells as he pulls out another weapon from his arsenal, this time combining 2 of his shoulder pad shields and producing some kind of spear (Don’t ask me what’s going on, I’m just describing what I see, it looks like his shoulder pads he pulled the MH5 from, but now it’s a spear. Plus he had one pad in the previous scene but once the spear came out, no pad) which he swung at Luffy, missing but causing a huge explosion.

 

_‘The fuck was that?’_

 

‘The mighty Battle Spear’ one Kreig pirate gasps ‘finally he’s stopped playing with the brat and fighting for real’

 

‘Playing hide and seek are we? Well time to finish things, this is my mighty battle spear, and unlike previous weapons when I hit you with this you won’t just get cut up or wounded, you’ll be blown straight to Hell’ he yells that last part as he slams it into the deck again ‘Big enough for you your majesty?’ He taunts smugly

 

‘ _Fuck, fuck, fuck, not the water’_ Luffy chants as he manages to grab another section of wreckage before he could fall in and sink to the bottom ‘An exploding spear, this is going to suck _Too bad Kaos isn’t around, I’d love his powers right about now_ ’ he moves to stand but fails ‘Shit, this isn’t good’

 

‘He’s lost too much blood’ Sanji guesses ‘This fight better end soon or he’s done for’

 

Kreig, seeing an opportunity hops onto Luffy’s piece, then begins trying to skewer the boy, luckily adrenaline enabled him to get back into action and dodge all the pirate’s swings

 

 

‘His true power is his strength, the battle spear is so deadly in his hands because nobody else can swing a spear so easily that weights over a ton’ (Ah hem, once again and I know he wasn’t introduced yet, but **WHITEBEARD**!!!! I have no idea how much his bisento weights but it sure aint lightweight)

 

 

The swinging and dodging continues until Luffy nearly falls off, jumping into the air to avoid slipping into the water ‘Die bastard’ Krief yells as he swings once more where Luffy can’t simply slip out of the way, luckily Luffy was able to find a safe place… the shaft of the spear itself

 

‘Wow… I didn’t think that was going to work’ he admits to himself, and because he thought out loud everyone heard

 

Krieg was really pissed at this point, flailing his spear until finally he managed to shake Luffy off, the tries to plunge the tip into the boy while he’s in the air (you know, like a spear is supposed to be used, he’s been using it as some kind of axe or exploding hammer up to this point if I’m being perfectly honest)

 

Luffy catches the blade between his fists… it doesn’t stop the explosion but it does seem to localise it, the blackened rubber pirate flopping to the ground

 

‘Ow’ Luffy groans slightly as he pulls himself to his feet

 

‘This is on you kid, if you hadn’t pissed me off so badly I might have shown mercy and killed you quickly, but no, you had to be a pain in my ass so now you’re going to suffer’ he laughs as he makes another swing, Luffy trying to fight back… and getting tossed back again. This repeats itself several times: Don swings at Luffy, our boy hits the ground a smoking lump, he stands back up and the process restarts, each time Luffy was smiling like an escaped mental patient while Kreig was getting even madder if that were possible.

 

‘You bastard, why won’t you die!!!!!’ he practically screams as he puts his all into another swing, shocked beyond belief when Luffy kicks it aside, sure it still exploded but when the dust settled the spear’s tip shattered like glass ‘What? How? My battle spear, what have you done!’

 

‘I just punched it in the head 5 times’ Luffy answers with a smirk ‘Maybe it’s time to let it rest. It’s my turn to fight now’

 

‘Damn this kid might actually win’ one of the cooks says with a smile

‘He broke the mighty battle spear’

‘Does Krieg even have anything bigger?’

 

‘I think we’re nearly done here’ Luffy thinks aloud ‘Now I broke your spear at least’

 

‘Hm, you think?’

 

‘Yeah, without the tip all you’ve got is a bomb on a stick, which while odd isn’t really a problem for me’ he replies with a grin

 

‘Oh really?’ Kreig clenches his teeth

 

‘Yep’

 

‘Well I think this bomb on a stick is still good enough to send you to kingdom come in little pieces’

 

Luffy shrugs ‘Well you can try, it’s not going to work but come on, knock yourself out’

 

‘You mock me kid, YOU’VE SIGNED YOUR OWN DEATH WARRANT!’ Krieg yells as he charges at the boy, slamming down where he was but Luffy had already pulled himself up onto the mast above him ‘You monkey!’ Kreig sneers as he swings at the support

 

‘Actually yes, yes I am’ Luffy says with a grin taking the moment he was in the air to charge up an attack on the way down

 

**Gum Gum Gattling**

 

The barrage of punches all connect with Kreig’s golden armour, but the man seems unimpressed even laughing when Luffy finally lands ‘Was that supposed to impress me kid? This is wootz steel armour, practically indestructible’

 

Luffy flashes a grin ‘Practically’ he then charges straight for the golden bastard in a move that for anyone else would be both stupid and suicidal

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

The clash sounded like a bell as both fighters stood stock still in silence, until one sound shocked everyone

 

_crack_

 

The so called invincible armour shattered like glass as Luffy bounced away, Kreig’s large frame falling like a sack of bricks without the rubber pirate to hold him up

 

‘Opps, I think I broke it, guess it’s not so unbreakable after all’ Luffy comments with his face in a thinking position (a rare sight given Luffy’s fighting style and general, straightforward outlook on things), the cooks cheer while the Kreig pirates gap in horror at their leader defeated

 

‘He, he actually won’ Gin gasps

 

‘Of course he did, he’s the captain’ Zoro smiles before devolving into a coughing fit, Kaya and Ginseng getting him to lie down again.

 

‘Good work brat’ Zeff grunts, a tiny smile flickers across his face as Luffy walks over to them, the boy’s straw hat held in the cooks hands.

 

‘Thanks old guy’ Luffy flashes him a ‘D’ grin as he puts back on his signature hat

 

‘NO!!! I AM THE GREATEST I CAN’T BE BEATEN I AM UNSTOPABLE!’ everyone turns to the frantic yelling as Krieg stand up, his body moving but it was clear the lights were on but nobody was home. The empty shell of anger a pride stomped in the direction of the ship, constantly yelling about his greatness and his strength

 

‘Ah crap’ Luffy groans as he turns, nearly stumbling until Patty grabs the back of his shirt

 

‘He’s not even conscious’

‘Don Kreig never give up’

 

The body of Kreig fnally reaches Baratie once more, but doesn’t make another step before taking one more impact to the face ‘I’ve had it with your arrogance young man, take a long nap’

 

‘Boots stained red’

‘With the blood of his enemies’

‘ _Red Foot_ Zeff still lives’

 

Sanji, surprised by the declaration actually looks down and would you believe it: Zeff was standing there, his peg leg and his boot covering in blood from shattering Kreig’s jaw and busting his nose just a few seconds ago ‘I may be old, but I’m not infirm… yet’ he says before turning to re-enter the restaurant as though nothing happened.

 

With Kreig finally down for the count Gin retook command rather easily, basically he just yelled ‘ ** _Men, we’re leaving_** ’ and they followed suit, anything to get away from the rubber boy and ‘ _Red Foot_ ’.

 

 

_ Later _

 

‘Alright everyone, soups on!’ Patty yells at his usual ear-splitting volume and everyone came to the table, even Luffy Kaya and Zoro, the latter still under the watchful eyes of both doctors. The problem was they ran out of chairs so Sanji found himself sitting between the rubber food black hole and the sheepish doctor, not that he minded the second of those options. Well that was the first problem, then…

 

‘Hey who prepared the soup?’ Patty asks

 

‘Oh that was me, it’s pretty good isn’t it’ Sanji announces happily, even Luffy could see the joy he gets from cooking as well as actually being acknowledged for it

 

‘You’re kidding right, this slop should’ve been tossed overboard, I might never get the taste out of my mouth’ the Popeye cook spits in Sanji’s direction, the blond clenches his fists and grits his teeth

 

‘There’s nothing wrong with my soup, it’s perfectly prepared as always’ Sanji manages to get out in a semi calm tone, just before Carnie spits his mouthful of soup out

 

‘Jeez Sanji, are you trying to kill us with this crap?’

 

After him came a full house of complaints about the food, all the while the Straw hats continued to eat and wonder what the Hell these guys were talking about, sure they had higher standards than Luffy, but that doesn’t mean Sanji’s food was bad.

 

The final straw came from Zeff, who actually finished his bowl… and promptly tossed it on the floor

 

‘That soup tasted worse than bathwater, we’d be out of business in days if we searved that crap’

 

‘You lying bastard!’ Sanji yells grabbing Zeff by his collars ‘What makes my soup any worse that the stuff you serve every day?’

 

Zeff sneers ‘You think we’re the same?’ he then surprises Sanji by backhanding him, knocking him to the floor ‘You’re at least a century behind me in terms of skill. Don’t flatter yourself’ he then waves his hand in the direction of their pirate guests.

 

Kaya gently sipped the soup, her nose crinkles but she continues

 

‘See’ Zeff grunts ‘Even the girl can’t stand eating your swill’ Sanji bites through his cigarette as he storms out

 

Luffy blinks ‘This stuff is really good, what’s wrong Kaya?’

 

The blond sighs ‘It’s delicious, but I’ve been eating simple and plain food for so long, I don’t know how much of this lovely rich food I can handle’

 

Zoro, under orders from Kaya and Ginseng to take it easy, nods in agreement with the rubber boy ‘If this is crap, I’ll gladly eat crap from now on’

 

Luffy grins widely before turning to Zeff ‘Hey chef guy, why’d you lie to Sanji about his food?’

 

Zeff sighs as he sits at the table ‘That boy’s the 2nd best cook on this boat, and seeing as the girl’s the only one who won’t burn water…’

 

‘Hey!’ Zoro yells angrily, while Luffy chuckles remembering Kaya and Kaos chasing him off after that incident (Don’t ask, just chalk it up to the enigma that is Monkey D. Luffy)

 

‘… I can set aside my pride long enough to say he has the potential to surpass me one day’

 

‘Oh I get it, except why if he’s so good you tell him his food is shit?’

 

‘To get him to leave of course’ Zeff answers ‘The kid thinks he owes me so much that he can’t go live his life. If you take the brat with you I’ll be very grateful’

 

‘Nope’ Luffy says seriously

 

‘WHAT?’ Everyone yells

 

‘I won’t accept you throwing Sanji at me; he needs to want to go for me to bring him’

 

‘Then it’s a good thing I’m going to go’ the blond announces from the doorway, Luffy’s eyes shining

 

‘Really?’

 

‘Yeah you rubber bastard’ he answers, rolling his eyes at the boy ‘And you…’ he turns to Zeff ‘Was it really, really that hard to say my food was good? I mean I should’ve known these morons were lying with all that bad acting they were doing, but still’

 

Zeff hits him with his peg leg ‘Don’t get cocky eggplant, I said you had potential, you’re still a shitty cook’

 

Before Sanji could retort there was a commotion outside, which turned out to be Yosaku and a fish

 

Big bro Luffy! We found her, we found where Big Sis Nami and Big Bro Kaos are’ he yelled half excited, half fearful

 

‘Really, where are they?’

 

Yosaku gulped ‘Arlong Park’

 

TBC

 

LW: Well here we go, the Shark bastard is coming, or I suppose Luffy is coming for shark bastard’s head.

 

Ginseng isn’t a real character, I just made him up because every ship needs a doctor, Zeff should know this. So tada now he has one :D. He can thank me the next time he’s in the story (not next chapter, though he is in the next chapter)

 

Yes when Zeff refers to Luffy’s predecessor he means Roger, as he was there when Luffy declared his dream of being the Pirate King.


	12. Operation Rescue Nami (part 1)

LW: Here we are a more filler /expositional chapter but they can’t all have shit happening.

 

Rubber King and Mirror master – Operation Rescue Nami

 

‘Bye guys, thanks for all the meat’ Luffy yells as he hops onto Sanji’s boat, Zoro already sleeping on deck, which Kaya rolls her eyes to. They were sitting for a few minutes before Sanji casually strolls out of the restaurant, sidestepping Patty and Carne trying to attack him and dropping his things on deck

 

‘Well time to go’ he mumbles, sucking in a lung full of smoke

 

‘You don’t need to say goodbye or anything?’ Luffy asks with a confused look on his face

 

‘Nah I’m good’

 

‘Sanji’ he freezes ‘Take care of yourself’ Zeff says a small smile on his face. Tears leak down Sanji’s cheeks as he tries to hold it together, his head finally putting together he was leaving a place he’d called home for so many years, possibly never to see it again.

 

‘Thanks Chef Zeff’ Sanji says as he practically prostrates himself before the restaurant, tears streaming down his face ‘You taught me everything I know that’s worth knowing, I can never repay you for that’ he stands and looks up at the man, still as stone ‘I don’t know why I expected anything’ he sighs and steps onto the boat ‘Bye pops’

 

**_Drip drip drip drip drip dirp_ **

 

‘Sanji you shitty eggplant!’ the blond turns and is shocked to see the old man cry ‘Men part without tears or fanfare, but look at me now. You will always be an annoying brat… and the son I never thought I’d ever want. Find the All Blue and even if you don’t you’ll do me proud’ the former pirate sniffles ‘now get out of my sight before I have to kick you all out myself!’

 

‘You got it old guy’ Luffy cheers, grabbing Sanji and pulling him onto the boat, then setting off following Yosaku’s directions.

 

_ The Going Merry _

 

Nami sighs ‘Those guys were idiots, but they were nice. I hope I see them again some day’

 

‘Knowing Luffy I can guarantee it’ll be sooner than later’ Nami freezes as Kaos steps out on deck ‘Hey Nami’

 

‘How’d you get on this ship?’ she asks, readying her bow staff

 

‘Through the mirror in your room, by the way you probably shouldn’t leave your underwear just hanging off of it like that, well I assume that was yours, Kaya doesn’t have enough weight on her bones yet to have a bust that size but if I’m wrong you can move it from your bed to hers’ the Merry’s former 1st mate grinning the entire time, well until he sees Nami’s bare arms ‘Ah that explains it’

 

Nami tries to hide it with her hand as she tensely asks ‘What are you talking about?’

 

‘ ** _I will never be a pirate, those people sicken me. The only thing I hate more than pirates are marines_** ’ he quotes, Nami surprised Luffy told him about that ‘The only thing I’m unsure of is whether the hate is directed inward at yourself, or outward towards your master’ his smile is gone, which despite her anger worries her.

 

_ Port, a little while later _

 

‘Nami’ a goldfish fishman greets her as he and a nurse shark fishman board the Merry ‘What you doing here with such a nice ship?’

 

Nami laughs slightly ‘from my last mark, idiots got off the ship and didn’t realise I wasn’t with them till I was already too far to stop me’

 

The goldfish taps the side ‘Good quality wood, either fetch a good price or be great for spare par _… K…gurgle_ ’ he didn’t finish the sentence, mostly due to the hand impaled through both his and his companion’s lung

 

‘Merry’s not for sale’ Kaos hissed, physically tearing out his left lung while simply sliding his hand out of the other

 

‘What the Hell was that for?’ Nami yells at the man she now regrets not trying to shove overboard

 

‘No witnesses. We toss them overboard and not only does nobody know about Merry, but if we move the ship a little nobody would even suspect they died on this ship’ the purple haired pirate explains

 

**_Crack_ **

 

Kaos barely shifts, only moving his hand to the back of his head to check for blood ‘You do know when this is over I’m paying you back for all this crap in full?’ he hisses almost tiredly

 

**_Crack_ **

 

The only straw hat on deck turns his head with a smirk ‘Is that it? I don’t know why Arlong keeps you around; a flirty virgin who can’t fight and clearly doesn’t think her actions through, or more importantly the consequences of said actions. Are your maps really that good Tanjerin-baka?’

 

**_Crack Thud_ **

 

Whether it was the strike to the face, the fact it was the 3rd blow to the head in about as many minutes or that Nami’s rage translated into power the ginger navigator finally brought him down

 

 

_ Back on Sanji’s boat _

 

‘You people are too chipper, are you fucking insane? Don’t you know every second edges us closer to the infamous Arlong and near certain death?’ Yosaku yells at a cheerfully bouncing Luffy and lightly sleeping Zoro, Sanji and Kaya just watching passively.

 

‘That’s nice, when’s lunch?’ Luffy asks as he stretches, clicking his back along the way.

 

‘I’ll go get it started’ Sanji replies as he stands up

 

‘Oh come on! None of you know who Arlong is?’ Yosaku asks, getting shrugs from everyone ‘Jeez. Here it is: Arlong is a fishman who used to destroy everything in his path back on the Grand Line…’

 

‘What’s a fishman?’ Kaya asks quietly, but not quiet enough

 

‘You guys don’t know what fishmen are?’ Yosaku asks

 

‘Are they like this?’ Luffy asks, holding up a drawing of a fish with arms and legs, getting chuckles from Zoro and Sanji while Kaya giggles behind her hand

 

‘You idiots have the attention span of 4 year olds! Okay let’s start at the top; The Grand line is known as the pirate graveyard because of Arlong and the other 2 powers, following so far?’

 

‘Yeah I suppose’ Luffy answers with a shrug

 

‘Now listen, ever heard of the 7 Warlords of the Sea, or the Shichibukai?’ asked Yosaku seriously as he does 7 shadows appear to represent them: 2 were monstrously huge, one of which was a fairly blobby shape while the other a solidly built male, another was tall and lanky, one was a rather round shape, the sole female identifiable by… well having breasts at least the size of her head, (at least Hancock’s easy to identify) and finally there was a man about Kaos’ height with a hook like weapon and Mihawk, identifiable by his signature hat.

 

‘I think Kaos mentioned them when he was talking to Kuro’ Kaya volunteered, the other 2 nod and Sanji shrugs

 

‘The 7 Warlords are pirates who operate with authority from the World Government’

 

Sanji raises a curly brow ‘Seriously? What pirate would want that?’

 

‘They do it for protection: the government looks away for a cut of their treasure, and allow them to do as they please as long as they follow direct orders from the WG, such as taking out other pirates. Sure to some pirates they’re WG lapdogs, but they wouldn’t have been chosen / selected unless they had the strength to back up the Government’s stamp of approval. Now you’ve already met one of them, Dracule _Hawkeye_ Mihawk’

 

Luffy was bouncing around like a child on a sugar high ‘These guys sound so cool, I can’t wait to meet all 7 of them!’ he cheers

 

‘There’s one named Jinbei, a whale shark fishman, he’s the captain of the Fishman pirates and a real menace, easily causing as much destruction as Arlong’

 

‘Is this him?’ Luffy asks showing off another picture

 

‘That’s the same picture, just the guy’s standing up’ Zoro complains, to which Luffy maturely sticks his tongue out in response

 

‘Since coming to the East Blue, Arlong has taken control of over 20 towns, his power is so monstrously huge he makes everyone you’d faced look like children, even Don Krieg’

 

‘Why would Nami go after a guy like that?’ Kaya asks

 

‘I told you, for his 20 million beri bounty, that’s probably the highest of anyone in the East Blue’ Yosaku answers

 

‘Oh wouldn’t it be great if Nami was a mermaid?’ Sanji swoons as he daydreams

 

‘She’d look like this’ Luffy declares, revealing a picture of his previous fishman with Nami’s haircut

 

‘Tear that up you bastard!’ Sanji orders through gritted teeth

 

_ Arlong _ _ Park _

 

When Kaos finally came to he found someone had bound his arms and ankles, sitting up he sees the fishmen (and Nami) all around him, in his own case facing a shark fishman, sitting like a king in front of a yellow building, the words ‘Arlong Park’ legible even from this distance/angle.

 

Kaos groans as he tries to find a comfortable position, looking at the grinning shark ‘You Arlong?’ he asks

 

‘Yes. I am Arlong, ruler of these islands. What brings you to my domain?’

 

‘Just retrieving our navigator for the Captain, ship kind of got away from us’ he smirks

 

‘Chew, you really expect us to believe that human?’ another fishman scoffs and oddly enough Kaos’ eyes sparkle

 

‘See Nami, if they let in someone who ate the Duck Duck fruit you should be just fine’ he grins even as Chew goes from blue to red

 

‘Human!’ he yells, but Arlong’s cackle stops him

 

‘You’re a strange human and I almost respect that, plus there’s the matter of your debt. Those fishmen you killed were luckily the weakest of my crew but you still need to pay for what you did. You will work off that debt working with my navigator, being the brawn to her brains. After all a brute like you could be about as strong as a teen fishman’ he cackles

 

‘Can you give the speciest superiority dogma a rest for a few minutes or something?’ Nami sighs as she steps into view ‘Some of us have to actually exist as a human.

 

‘Of course Nami, but would it kill you to lighten up even a little? You know I don’t include you, your skills are so much more superior to the rest of your species I couldn’t do anything but make you my navigator’

 

‘Hey Nami, these thugs didn’t damage the Merry did they?’ Kaos asks, confusing Arlong

 

‘How do you know my navigator?’

 

‘Better question: How do you know OUR navigator? He replies

 

‘Nami, care to explain this’ Arlong asks, waving his hands in Kaos’ oddly relaxed direction

 

‘Don’t worry boss, he’s just another sucker who thought he’d be the exception to the countless other pirates I’ve picked clean of valuables. The fact he followed me here is as sad as it is impressive don’t you think, like a puppy, or whatever you fishmen have as an equivilent’ Nami answers, some of the fishemen in the area chuckling at her description

 

Kaos’ lip curls ‘I told Luffy we should have left you on the island’

 

Nami laughs ‘Yeah, Miss Nami, you’re services will not be required or some crap. But the captain still wanted me, so you were stuck’

 

‘You’re fresh out of luck human. Nami’s cold blooded as any fishman, even sold out her own family for money’ Nami freezes as Arlong says that, laughing as usual afterwards

 

Kaos frowns; he didn’t like this Nami, not one bit. Nami was supposed to be greedy, treasure obsessed and kind of a bunt, sarcastic and quick to anger, usually due to Luffy or Usopp being idiots, Zoro’s laziness or his intentional attempts to piss her off. This Nami was an ice sculpture with a hole in her heart you could herd a sea king through if you were so inclined… or were somehow able to.

 

‘Well if you’re in the business of selling humans how much for the red head? I know purity increases the value but overall personality should even it all out’ he jokes, getting the intended reaction when Nami punches his head into the ground.

 

‘He’s cocky I’ll give him that’

‘Especially for a human, chew’

 

‘I’m not for sale asshole!’ Nami yells with pointed teeth

 

‘While I usually don’t like being spoken for she has a point, Nami is part of my crew, and therefore she’s not for sale’

 

‘It was worth a shot, oh and Nami thought you should get this message in person; Luffy is coming, not even I could stop him if I wanted to. Might want to start counting the days’ his smirk nearly reaches his ears, pointed teeth interlocking in a cracked mirror of the fishman in front of him

 

The fishmen looked confused and the purplette noticed their navigator pale just a bit.

 

‘Whelp I’d better go then’ before Nami can react she receives a kick to the face before Kaos catapults himself into the pool leading out to sea. To the surprise of most of the fishmen once she righted herself Nami dove in after him, disappearing for longer than they thought a human could last under before finally surfacing

 

‘Nami, what the hell was that about?’ Arlong demands an answer

 

‘Even if he could have freed his arms the bastard was a Devil Fruit user so he as screwed either way. Only reason I jumped in was because he had some kind of weird shape shifting sword, must’ve been worth a lot. Shame he sank like a stone. If you want it I’m sure one of you superior fishmen can retrieve it later’

 

Arlong tenses ‘ _How? How could some worthless human like that find the Hebi…_ ’ he doesn’t even finish the thought; the human was a trickster nothing more and on the off chance it was true he’d send one of his men to salvage it and give him the ultimate weapon, it’s **_curse_** would kill inferior humans but a fishman should have not trouble taming it’s power.

 

 

_ Between scenes _

 

Surfacing not far from Arlong Park Nami wastes no time hitting Kaos again in the face ‘Dumb ass! What did you do that for?’

 

‘I knew you wouldn’t let me die Nami, you’re kind of a bitch but you’re not the stone hearted monster you and long nose claim to be’

 

Nami’s quiet for a minute before speaking again ‘Why are you here? Why come for me when you admit you think you should have left me in Orange Town?

 

Kaos sighs ‘I still do, you’re causing us a lot of trouble ginger quim. But regardless of that, just like Luffy I believe in the idea of crew being family, nakama. We don’t have to get along all the time and can even act like we hate everyone or a certain someone else on board… but you’re there when it counts, because you know we will be as well. Like I said back there, Luffy’s coming and with him your freedom from that bastard Arlong’ he smirks until Nami punches him in the shoulder

 

‘Idiot. Arlong’s a fishman, no human can…’ Kaos slaps her across the face

 

‘Don’t underestimate Luffy, or me. Get your coat, pack your bags and be ready to go, because we’re not leaving this island without you’

 

‘Idiots the lot of them’ Nami mutters but does nothing further

 

‘You should go’ Kaos says, pointing to Arlong Park ‘Humans can’t last this long underwater’ he smirks then watches her leave before standing up ‘Now where the fuck are the other humans on this island?’ he thinks aloud, heading in the opposite direction to Arlong Park.

 

TBC

 

LW: Well there it was, more for everyone :D

Also as much as enjoyed Zoro and Nami’s little squabble in Arlong Park, he’s on the boat with Luffy so I had to make do with Kaos. I think he had fun.

 

Also is it weird at this point in time that Arlong was considered on par with any of the WarLords, even more so Jinbei? Ha!


	13. Operation Rescue Nami (part 2)

LW: Well I got no cool title ideas so for now we continue the previous name. Enjoy

 

Rubber king and Mirror master – Operation Rescue Nami (part 2)

 

_ Sanji’s boat _

 

‘Grubs up!’ Sanji calls, bringing out a tray of food for the crew

 

‘Yay! Meat’ Luffy cheers, Kaya giggling at his enthusiasm as he digs in, despite Sanji’s attempts to slow him down, Zoro smirks tiredly while Yosaku still sits tensely

 

The relative calm is broken by a loud rumble, followed by ripples and a shadow under the surface, indicating something large was approaching

 

‘Sea King!’ Yosaku yells, everyone tensing or reaching for a weapon until it surfaces…

 

‘More like a Sea Cow’ Sanji deadpans and he was right, the creature did have a head resembling a cow, even down to the ring in its nose

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

‘Mooshoo!’ An octopus fishman calls, waving a cooked pig around ‘Where is he? He’s never late for dinner’ he scratches his head and keeps yelling

 

_ Back with the Straw Hats _

 

‘I think he’s hungry’ Kaya suggests, seeing it gaze longingly at the plate

 

**BAM**

 

‘Hands off it’s ours!’ Luffy yells, giving the Sea Cow a lump on its head

 

‘That was rude Luffy, relax there’s plenty of food to go around’ Sanji scolds, before offering some to the sea cow, when…

 

**BAM**

 

‘Sanji!’ Kaya yells

 

‘Bastard nearly bit my hand off’ he grumbles as the animal whimpers with 2 lumps on its head

 

‘Hey, this thing could help us get to Nami and the others’ Luffy grins as he stretches out and grabs the sea cow by it’s horns, holding him steady while the others attach the ropes ‘Onward Adventure!’ he yells, the fearfully beaten Sea Cow towing the strange humans into land

 

_ A little while later, at the island _

 

‘ _Why is there never anyone around when you’re looking for directions?_ ’ Kaos thinks before freezing ‘Luffy’ he grins but then has to jump out of the way to avoid getting run over by the boat they were on ‘Holy crap! _Sigh_ , only you Monkey’ he chuckles, running over to the wreckage of a ship they’d just broke.

 

‘Kaos! We found you. Did you see Usopp or Johnny?’ Luffy yells as him and the others get out of the boat

 

‘Sorry Luffy but I haven’t even found town yet, never mind whoever else you sent after Nami’

 

Luffy pouts, then grins ‘Oh, well I guess we’ll just have to look for them together.’

 

Kaos nods and sighs ‘Let’s hope they haven’t gotten into any trouble, these fishmen seem the kind to kill first ask questions later’ he grumbles as Kaya dusts herself off and Yosaku helps Zoro to his feet. The group had just gotten ready to move when they had another interruption in the form of their missing bounty hunter

 

‘Johhny, but where’s Usopp?’ Zoro thinks aloud, the others having similar thoughts

 

‘Usopp’s dead’ Johnny yells ‘Nami killed him!’

 

Kaya freezes and turns a sickly grey colour ‘Usopp’s dead?’

 

‘He’s gone, he’s dead, I saw the whole thing. Nami just straight up murdered him’

 

**_SLAM_** ‘ow’ **_THUD_**

 

‘Why’d you do that?’ Zoro and Yosaku yell after Johnny falls to the ground from being kicked in the face by Kaos

 

‘I’m curious too, I mean I was about to do the same for bad mouthing Nami but you’ Sanji wonders

 

‘Because Nami didn’t kill him’

 

Zoro scoffs ‘Don’t tell me she’s got you bewitched too, don’t even see how someone as small as her would appeal to you’

 

The purplette rolls his eyes ‘That’s not what I meant dumbass. Nami won’t kill, she also can’t just let someone die nearby, as I know personally’ he explains, getting confused looks

 

‘So you nearly drowned and I pulled you out, that make me a saint or something?’

 

‘Nami!’ Everyone yells, Luffy and Kaos having to stop Kaya from shooting the ginger thief

 

‘If by nearly drowned you mean kicked you in the face and made a daring aquatic escape and by pulled out you mean dived in after me and dragged me out of Arlong Park then yes’ Kaos answers, sidestepping a kick from Sanji but gets punched in the head by Luffy ‘Ow’

 

‘You could have died’ Luffy states

 

‘I trusted our navigator, is that wrong?’

 

‘Of course not, shishishi’ Luffy laughs

 

‘Fucking idiots. Just get out of here before you cause any more damage’

 

Luffy frowns ‘We’re not leaving till we get you back and we’re all on the deck of the Merry heading for the GrandLine, something we need our navigator for’

 

Nami groans and resists pinching her nose ‘Listen here you morons, I’m Arlong’s navigator, I’m not leaving with you so get out of here before what happened to Usopp happens to you too!’

 

Before either could respond Kaya had stolen back on of her guns and pointed it at Nami’s head ‘So it’s true then, that it was you who killed Usopp?’ she asks, her voice steel even if her hands still shook

 

Nami smiles mirthlessly ‘Yep, thanks to me that little coward is sleeping with the fishes’ her smirk and confidence vanishes though when Kaos’ grip on her wrists steady Kaya’s aim

 

‘Why are you so willing to die for something you didn’t do? What did that long nosed fuckface do to you?’ he asks, surprisingly sympathetically

 

‘Leave, I don’t care how strong you think you are but these are fishmen a handful of kind of strong humans don’t stand a chance’

 

Luffy smiles slightly while Kaos grins ‘Here that little monkey, we might get a real workout while we’re here.’ The captain nods energetically

 

‘ _I don’t know why I’m even trying with these headcases._ Arlong will tear you apart, so turn around and leave, never return’ she says emotionlessly

 

Kaos sighs ‘You know what, you’re not even part of the crew anymore so I don’t have to take this I’m going for a walk’ he says causing Nami to blink

 

‘What! You’re just going to take a walk?’

 

‘Bye, see you later, try not to kill anyone else’ Luffy waves

 

‘No promises’

 

Nami turns red ‘Hey! Don’t ignore me!’ she swings her bo staff… but Kaos caught the end and with barely a moment shoved it back, the other end slamming into the navigator’s gut. He then continued to walk off as if nothing happened

 

‘So, still not coming?’ Luffy asks, Nami grits her teeth as she holds in her anger

 

‘Get it through that rubber head of yours, I’m not going anywhere! The whole reason I joined was to make money and it was always going to end with me stealing everything that wasn’t nailed down. Now you’re of no use to me, so take your ship, get out of my site, find a navigator dumb enough to join your little band of misfits and then go on your insane journey along the Grand Line’ she practically hisses

 

Luffy response, surprisingly was to keel over backwards lying on the ground looking up at the clouds.

 

‘ _The fuck?_ ’ was the collective thoughts of everyone present

 

‘I’m not going to get involved with what’s happening on the island, but that doesn’t mean I’m leaving without my navigator. Seems taking a nap is the best option’ he explains, before pushing his hat over his eyes to keep out the sun

 

‘FINE YOU WANT TO DIE SO BADLY BE MY GUEST!!’ Nami screams before running off, leaving a pissed off Kaya and Zoro along with a confused Johnny, Yosaku and Sanji.

 

_ A little while later _

 

 

‘…honestly I always thought she was a small time crook who couldn’t watch someone die never mind kill them, but then again she has spent the last few weeks around Luffy so maybe she just snapped’ Zoro says, meditating beside Luffy’s sleeping and Kaya’s cloud gazing forms.

 

Sanji nods ‘Yeah….wait a minute!’ he yells jumping forward into a kick

 

‘NAMI’S NOT SMALL!’

 

‘Is that all you heard Eros?’

 

**SLAM!**

 

‘Usopp!’

‘You’re alive!’ Kaya and Luffy yell as the long nosed teen falls to the ground

 

‘Well he was’ Zoro deadpans, poking him with the toe of his boot and as glad as everyone else when he twitched and groaned

 

Usopp, you can’t possibly know how happy I am you’re alive’ Kaya whimpers as she holds the weak sniper close, Sanji privately steaming that the long nosed liar got to be held by _sweet Kaya_.

 

‘Not that I’m not happy to see you but we heard you were dead, what happened?’ Zoro asks, Luffy nodding in agreement

 

‘Nami tricked those fishmen, she stabbed her hand and then hit me with it so it looked like I was bleeding. I swam away the second I was out of sight’ Usopp explains, Kaya turning a sickly grey once more

 

‘I tried to kill her and she hadn’t even done anything wrong?’ she asks rhetorically, Usopp pulling her into an embrace before she could collapse

 

‘Hey, hey Kaya it’s fine, you didn’t know she didn’t actually kill me and you didn’t kill her so everything’s fine’ he says comfortingly

 

‘Only because Luffy and Kaos stopped me’ she sniffles

 

‘Well now that’s all been cleared up, let’s go kick some extra scaly ass’ Sanji’s announcement was met with agreement from the rest of the crew

 

‘Oh no you don’t!’ everyone turns back up the road where a woman with light blue hair and tattoos is looking at them angrily (Hm, wonder if Belle-mère gave lessons?)

 

TBC

 

LW: Yeah this was a short one, the episodes and my notes gave me a cliffy moment and I was a little busy this fortnight so I took the easy way out. Hopefully there will just be one more of these before your regularly scheduled OP beat downs (One of the things One Piece is famous for, mostly because boobs are normal sized till the middle of the Grand Line) as well as normal length chapters for anyone who has problems with the current size.

Also I skipped Ussop’s adventure because it was the same as in canon.

 


	14. Operation Rescue Nami (part 3)

LW: Well here we go, last chapter before Luffy and the gang start kicking people’s ass and we get a very special reveal.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Operation Rescue Nami (part 3)

 

‘Attacking Arlong park is suicide. That fishman can’t be defeated’ the bluenette continues

 

‘Nojiko!’ Usopp gasps

 

‘Do you know her Usopp?’ Kaya asks in confusion

 

‘She’s Nami’s sister’ was his answer, and Sanji reacted accordingly

 

‘Nami’s sister, no wonder she’s such a specimen of divine beauty’ he swoons

 

‘Don’t get involved in this issue, it won’t end well for you. I think it’s best I explain the situation’

 

Kaya looks worrued ‘Situation? You mean why Nami joined Arlong, you can tell us?’

 

Nojiko nods ‘Sure, and if that doesn’t send you running I don’t know what will

 

‘Sorry I’ll pass, maybe Kaos was right and a walk will do me good’ Luffy mutters as he stands

 

‘Luffy, you don’t want to know Nami’s backstory?’ Usopp asks, surprised when his captain shrugs

 

‘Hey Nojiko, will listening to you tell me this story change my plans in any way?’ her response was silence ‘That’s what I thought, I don’t care about Nami’s past or how she got here, I can’t do anything about it, what I do care about is Nami now and how I’m going to kick Arlong’s ass for everything he’s done to her’ with that he walks away

 

_‘Weird kid’_ Nojiko thinks ‘ _Stubborn too_ ’

 

‘Don’t worry about it; it’s just the way the Captain is. You can tell us but I guarantee it won’t change our resolve or make us run like you want us to’ Zoro says before sitting against a tree.

 

With Luffy gone Nojiko begins her tale: telling them about Bele-mere, the former marine who found them in a war zone and took them under her wing, who was stubborn as karioseki and flirty just for the fact it unnerved people, mostly Genzo. About how her family was poor but got by (for the most part)… until the fishmen arrived. Usopp already knew about the tribute money but Nojiko went on to explain that there hadn’t been enough money for their little family, so Bele-mere sacrificed herself, using the money to pay to keep the 2 of them alive, though not before giving her best shot against Arlong, not that it did anything. How Arlong took Nami as part of his crew and the deal Nami made to buy the village from him for 100,000,000 beri. When she finished her story Kaya and Usopp were crying, Sanji was so angry he was practically steaming and while it didn’t show on his face, Zoro’s knuckles were white on Wado’s hilt, in the bushes nearby Yosaku and Johnny cried silently.

 

‘They’re not going to care’ Zoro says after Nojiko once more tells them to stay out of Nami’s business ‘Luffy’s claimed her as his navigator and I think Kaos has managed to find a way to banter with the witch, not that either would admit it. You can say anything you want to us, the captain has the final say and he’s already decided to retrieve her’ despite his anger he smiles, knowing if one thing is for certain, it’s that Luffy will **_NEVER_** give up on a crewmate, and Kaos will gladly tear through as many of those fishmen as he can along the way (and Zoro doesn’t even know about the 2 he’s already killed since getting here O_O)

 

 

_Nami & Nojiko’s grove/orchard/thing _(the anime isn’t sure what it is either so how the Hell should I know?)

 

‘Are you the one known as the pirate thief Nami?’ Marine Captain Nezumi asks with a slimy tone that made Nami feel unclean ‘We have reason to believe you’ve hidden quite a sizable amount of plunder in this tangerine grove’ he smiles as Nami pales and Genzo’s jaw drops ‘Now you’ve stolen from pirates so we have no reason nor intention of arresting you, but theft is still a crime. So we’ll be taking all your ill gotten gains on behalf of the World Government, give it to us right now!’ he orders.

 

Nami smirks ‘Nice to see where you’re priorities are, won’t deal with a gang of ruthless pirates, but will bring a platoon to steal from a girl just trying to get by’ she turns to them, showing her tattoo ‘With that in mind I really doubt you want to mess with the Arlong pirates, which is exactly what will happen if you continue with this course of action’

 

‘Chichichi, you really think I’m that stupid girilie, men find the money now!’ he yells and the marines follow suit, heading for the tangerines

 

Nami grits her teeth and reach for her staff ‘Hold it right there!’ she yells, a tic forming when they just walk past ‘I said STOP!’ this time punctuated with her bo staff being slammed into their face ‘Is this really what you should be doing right now? Arlong has over 20 islands in a strangle hold, and you ignore it all just to rob me’ she growls at Nezumi, who just smiles

 

‘Sir this orchard looks kind of suspicious, what do we do?’ one of the marines call over

 

‘Dig it up, the whole place if you have to’ the rat faced man answers dismissively… as Nami looses her shit

 

‘STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM BELE-MERE’S TANGERINES!’ she screams as she rushes over, attacking any marine unlucky enough to find himself in her path ‘I WON’T LET YOU RUIN THIS PLACE, I WON’T LET YOU TAKE MY MONEY EITHER, THAT MONEY IS FOR… is for…’

 

‘That money is the only chance this village has at a future’ Genzo yells angrily ‘You come here and have the gall to try take it away from us when you won’t even raise a finger to fix the problem. Belle-mere is the only good marine to ever set foot in Cocoyashi’

 

Nami gasps ‘Genzo, you knew?’

 

The man sighs, his age showing in his face ‘I’ve always know. I couldn’t believe you’d join Arlong’s crew of your own free will, not after what he did to your mother. I managed to get the answers out of Nojiko, was easier than I thought, girl didn’t want to keep something like this a secret it was just too big. Everyone in the village knows, about how you’re part of Arlong’s crew to save us from his scaly clutches. But we swore we’d never say anything, we didn’t want you to know we were placing our hopes on your shoulders, it wasn’t right to burden you like that’

 

Nami just stares ‘Genzo, that can’t be true’ she barely mutters

 

‘So you mean to tell me this whole village is a den of thieves, and that I should take them all in to cut this blight from the island?’ rat face asks with a smug smirk

 

‘He’s saying the village is doing what it must to survive, especially when it has no other option as we can’t trust you government morons to tell us when it’s raining never mind deal with the pirates like your supposed to’ the marine turns to the source of the answer, seeing Nojiko walk into the tangerine field, every muscle tense ‘So if you’re not here to help us deal with the problem, get the fuck off our property before I kick you out. And you might want to sail away before Arlong notices you and sinks your ship like the last 12’

 

‘Arlong will, chichichi’ Nezumi chuckles

 

A weight settles in Nami’s stomach as she hopes the thought running through her mind was just paranoia

 

‘Seriously how hard is it to find? It’s 100,000,000 beri not a lost ball!’ Nezumi yells, his words striking a cord with both Nami and Genzo

 

‘How’d you know how much was there?’ he asks to which the marine just smirks

 

‘I don’t, just making a guess chichichi’ he replies and Nami’s blood runs cold

 

_‘He sold me out, Arlong betrayed me’_ she thought angrily, even though the grip on her bo staff loosened

 

‘He sent you didn’t he? That fishman bastard Arlong?’ Genzo asks in a grave tone, causing Nezumi to gasp in offence

 

‘I would never do a pirates dirty work’ he smirks ‘I’m just a public servent dealing with crimes as is expected of me’

 

‘The marines have sunk pretty low if you’re the errand boy to a pirate’ Nojiko hisses

 

 

Before anything else can happen a voice calls from deep in the orchard ‘Sir we found it’

 

Nezumi’s mousy face is nearly split by his grin as he kneels by Nami’s hoard ‘My my I’m impressed you actually managed to obtain this much treasure. _And 30% of this is all mine’_

 

‘Don’t touch that. Don’t Touch That. DON’T TOUCH THAT. **DON’T TOUCH THAT!** ’ Nami repeats over and over as she runs at the corrupt marine, Nojiko and Genzo trying to stop her before things can get worse (if that’s even possible)

 

‘This is what you get for interfering’ Mouseface shouts, pulling out his gun and firing

 

**Prism**

 

**Bang** _Splat_

 

They all stood frozen in shock as the marine to the right of mouseface’s head exploded due to the redirected bullet, Kaos stands to his full height, sidesteps Nojiko who Genzo pulls beside him and back to the village, and slowly walks up to the still fidgeting marine, a chrome coloured coating beginning to coat his right leg. Meanwhile Nami has already left, wanting to hear it straight from the shark’s mouth.

 

‘This is Nami’s money and her family’s tangerines. Get out!’ he growls, a shining kick sending the idiot far enough he wouldn’t be a problem for a while and his sub…grunts were all either dead, unconscious (due to Nami, Kaos and even a couple by Nojiko’s hand) or scared too badly to cause trouble, meaning Nami’s money was safe for the moment.

 

It was the main square before Nojiko was thinking coherently enough she could slap Genzo’s had away ‘Damn it Genzo I’m fine, nothing even happened!’ she practically screams at the man

 

‘I know but you were nearly shot and I wasn’t going to give that rat bastard another chance at a cheap shot’ Genzo replied tensely

 

‘Then why not grab Nami?’

 

He laughs humourlessly ‘Because unlike you Nami had a weapon, plus she managed to inherit ALL of Belle-mere’s stubbornness. It took both of us just to hold her in place and even that was a stretch, there was no way I was getting you both down here on my own’

 

‘Genzo, what’s going on?’ one of the villagers

 

‘The marines, they’re working with Arlong, they were here to take Nami’s money. He never planned to let her have the village, just stringing her along so she’ll work for him’ Genzo explains, the villagers gasp and swear

 

‘That bastard!’

‘Hurting our Nami like that’

 

‘Quiet!’ Nojiko yells ‘The time for standing around and letting someone else deal with our problem is over. We need to end this today’

 

‘She’s right. We’ve lay on our backs for too long, it’s time to take up arms and fight for our freedom!’ Genzo joins in, together they were rallying the village into a frenzy

 

‘Hey’ the crowd turned and saw Nami in front of them, panting heavily as if she’d run a marathon, tears still staining her cheeks ‘Everything will be fine, this is just a slight set back. I’ll just have to steal another 100 million, I’ve done it once already so it should be much easier this time around, quicker too’ she smiled widely, but even Luffy would see it was tight and forced

 

**SLAM**

 

‘ _Ow, is this how it feels for the guys? Guess Nojiko got Bele-mere’s smackdowns_ ’ Nami clutches her head in pain from the strike, before Nojiko and Genzo pull her into an embrace

 

‘You’ve done enough idiot, now it’s up to us’ she whispers

 

‘I’m sorry you’ve had to bear the weight of our future on your back Nami. That ends right now, we’re going to do what should have been done 8 years ago’ Genzo adds, and Nami’s eyes start to water

 

Nami watches frozen as the entire village rushes of to fight Arlong, off to their deaths. It’s this moment when pain anguish and rage finally reach their boiling point inside the navigator, pulling her knife from her belt.

 

‘ARLONG! Arlong! Arlong!’ she yells each time she stabs the dagger into her tattoo, uncaring as to the damage she did to what lay underneath as long as his brand was mutilated beyond recognition. It was on her 4th swing that someone stopped her, removing the blade from her shock numbed fingers while another bandaged her arm, even if it wasn’t done well. Opening her eyes her tear filled eyes she gasps ‘Luffy? Kaos?’

 

‘Hey Nami’ the purplette greets as he tightens the bandage, what unnerved her was the blankness on their faces, they looked nothing almost nothing like the jovial idiots/dumbasses she’d known until now

 

‘Luffy’ his eyes meet hers, from under his hat ‘Help me’ she sniffles pathetically (in her mind at least)

 

Luffy’s smile returns for a second, even if it was much smaller than usual ‘That’s all I was looking for’ he says before Nami feels a weight on her head and he walks off

 

Bringing her hand up she freezes as her suspicions were confirmed ‘ _Luffy’s straw hat, but he values this thing almost more than his own life, he’s beaten people to a pulp for simply touching it_ ’ she wonders why he left it with her as the brothers grab their team

 

‘Everyone ready?’ Luffy asks as he walks up to Zoro, Sanji, Usopp and Kaya

 

‘As I’ll ever be’

‘Glad we finally get to the fighting’

‘Time to make sushi out of these fishman bastards’

 

‘Good. Kaya, try help Nami with her injury, the rest of us are going to go kick Arlong’s ass. Nobody makes our navigator cry and gets away with it’

 

The mob, consisting of the entirety of Cocoyashi village lead by Genzo and Nojiko made it all the way to the gates of Arlong Park before being stopped by unlikely sources: Johnny and Yosaku. Looking severely worse for wear, both were sitting in front of the entrance, their swords crossed in an X between them

 

‘Let us through!’ one of the villagers yell

 

‘No way, you wouldn’t stand a chance’ Yosaku replies

 

‘We already tried; we heard what Arlong did to Big Sis Nami and wanted to make him pay. We al… we got the absolute shit beat out of us for trying. You may have the numbers but Arlong could beat you all single-handedly’ Johnny adds

 

‘Then why are you here? Trying to scare people off?’ Nojiko asks

 

‘No we’re waiting’

 

‘There are probably a handful of people in the entire East Blue who can stand up to fishmen and lucky for you these guys are on the island for the same reason as we are. And here they come now’

 

The villagers part by the sheer prescience of these 5 people, none more so than the Little and Large of the group [Until Chopper joins Luffy was the youngest of the Straw Hats and he’s shorter than Usopp, by about an inch or so. Already mentioned Kaos is 8ft and 19, same age as Zoro and Sanji]

 

‘So how do you want to deal with this?’ Luffy asks, referring to the door

 

‘We should probably knock, right Sanji?’ Kaos asks with a smirk

 

‘It’s only polite; we’re not savages after all’ the chef replies around his cigarette

 

The 2 nod before kicking the door, sending it flying across Arlong Park, even wrecking the wall on the other side and knocking out a couple of fishmen in it’s path

 

‘Hey! Which one of you is Arlong?’ Luffy yells from the now totalled entranceway, the fishman in question surprised but also curious

 

‘That would be me!’ He announces from his throne wondering what laughable actions this weak looking human was going to do

 

He did not expect a punch strong enough to both hurt him and knock him off his chair

 

‘That’s for making our navigator cry!’

 

‘Who are you? _And more importantly what are you? No human should be able to punch that hard’_ he thinks as he stands up

 

‘Monkey D. Luffy, the guy who’s going to be kicking your ass this morning’

 

TBC

 

LW: Do the guys know how to make an entrance or what? They also know how to destroy one too. (Poor attempt at humour is poor)

Also did anyone, while watching the flashback wish Bele-mere had just shot Arlong in the face instead of talked to him? I sure do. Don’t know how much damage it would have done but better than nothing.

When Nami mentions Luffy beating the crap out of people for so much as touching his hat, she’s referring to Orange Town when they 1st met. I didn’t mention it because it wasn’t important; it was basically Luffy oneshots 3 nobodies and moving swiftly on.

 

New powers/techniques

**Prism** : By activating his powers in 2 separate, unconnected parts of his body, usually the palms of his hands, it can bridge the gap and form something akin to a gateway, moving objects from one patch to the other. What this means in the case of this chapter is the bullet hit one patch and was shot out of the other. This technique is basically me running with my brain asking; If they can dodge things with Haki later, why not be able to move _into_ the line of fire? Also seeing as I mentioned it like a second ago, yes it’s a bit of a luck based ability at the moment as to whether he can get it to work or not, but as the series progresses (and like everyone else he learns at least some haki) he’ll get better on those occasions in which this skill is actually used. Probably won’t be using it too often.


	15. Arlong's General's: Ray, Octopus & Lips

LW: Well here we go, fight!

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Arlong’s generals: Ray, Octopus and Lips

 

**_ Previously on RK & MM _ **

 

_‘Hey! Which one of you is Arlong?’ Luffy yells from the now totalled entranceway, the fishman in question surprised but also curious_

_‘That would be me!’ He announces from his throne wondering what laughable actions this weak looking human was going to do_

_He did not expect a punch strong enough to both hurt him and knock him off his chair_

_‘That’s for making our navigator cry!’_

_‘Who are you? And more importantly what are you? No human should be able to punch that hard’ he thinks as he stands up_

_‘Monkey D. Luffy, the guy who’s going to be kicking your ass this morning’_

 

** And now onto the next chapter **

 

**_Luffy is coming, not even I could stop him if I wanted to. Might want to start counting the days_ **

 

‘Luffy huh, I hears about you from one of your crew, weakling offed himself soon after though, Hahahaha!’ Arlong taunts until his eyes met familiar green

 

‘Yo, motherfucker’ Kaos greets with a taunting smirk and a wave

 

‘How can he be alive? Chew’

‘I told you Nami had betrayed us, no human can last that long underwater’ Kuroobi, the ray fishman grumbles

 

‘That’s what I said but you know Nami and her rants, they don’t come in an abridged form’ Kaos replies with a shrug, a ghost of a smile pass his lips as the charging fishmen get knocked back by a flurry of blades and kicks

 

‘Damn idiot, you had to shoot from the hip and punch the big one didn’t you?’ Sanji grumbles

 

‘I’m fine, these idiots are no trouble’ Luffy replies

 

‘I’m not worried about you, I’m worried you and creepy here are going to hog all the action’

 

Kaos chuckles ‘Don’t worry Eros, there’s plenty of ‘action’, I’m sure you’ll fine something to hit’

 

‘Well you guys can have all the action you want’ Usopp says from behind, getting shoved past by Zoro

 

‘Nice to see nothing’s changed since the last fight you were in Usopp’ he mutters, breathing more shallow than usual

 

The shark was beginning to twitch just behind his right eye, which Kuroobi caught before stepping forward

 

‘Relax Arlong, don’t waste your energy on these humans’ the ray says passively

 

‘We’ll deal with them easily, Chew’ another scoffs

 

‘Exactly’ the octopus agrees, hopping to the front ‘Hello, I’m Hatchan, my friends call me Hachi, but you can call me Hatchan’ he breathes in deeply, blowing up like a balloon, before he turns to the sea and releases it, producing a loud trumpeting sound

 

‘Okay I know he’s a bad guy in this but is anyone else impressed by that?’ Kaos asks, Luffy and Usopp nod, Sanji and Zoro barely resist facepalming, unlike Nojiko

 

There is a loud rumble and Hatchan grins widely ‘Now quake in fear at the mighty Mohmoo!’ he yells as, rising from the water… is the sea cow from earlier, the bumps on its head still visible

 

‘Huh, so that’s why he’s here’ Luffy thinks aloud

 

‘Arlong must have brought him as a deterrent or scare mongering’ Sanji guesses

 

The seacow gets one look at the pirates and fear runs down its body, quickly turning around and swimming in the other direction

 

‘Wait, come back Mohmoo, you can’t just leave!’ Hatchan yells, flailing his arms around like a crazy person

 

‘Leaving so soon?’ Mohmoo freezes at Arlong’s voice ‘Well if you want to run and hide who am I to stop you?’ the seacow may not be able to see Arlong’s smirk but the human could and were worried ‘Well?’

 

Mohmoo turns and gives a feral roar, charging straight for the straw hats, who ready their weapons… well except Usopp who was understandably panicking

 

**_Crack, Crack_ **

 

Luffy slams his feet into the ground, spins his torso around several times and grabs onto Mohmoo’s horns ‘Guys I got this’

 

‘Oh crap’

‘Luffy don’t you dare’

‘Moron!’

 

‘Time for something new!’

 

**Gum Gum Pinwheel**

 

Luffy relaxes his body, causing the tension to be released, the rubber boy spinning around so his body could return to normal. What made this an attack as opposed to rubber man yoga was that he was still holding onto Mohmoo’s horns, the sea cow being taken for a ride while Luffy uncoils, taking down/out any fishman that were in it’s way. It was just before he ran out of spin Luffy let go, sending Mohmoo flying out of Arlong Park and leaving only 4 fishmen still standing: Arlong, Chew, Hatchan and Kuroobi.

 

‘Okay Arlong I didn’t come here to beat the crap out of these dumbasses I came here to kick your ass, so get up off it and fight me!’ Luffy yells, the shark actually smirking at the rubber balls on this kid to call him out. HIM, Sawtooth Arlong!

 

Luffy’s recent attack was an entirely friendly fire capable technique as his own crew angrily pointed out, the one in the most danger (really just due to his size) actually the one who was scared and injured the least, Kaos having seen the beginning of Luffy’s crazy idea immediately fell to the floor, out of the path of destruction Luffy caused, so was content to laugh at the mayhem and collateral damage his little brother and Mohmoo had left in their wake. There was just one problem even he was going to be annoyed by…

 

‘Um guys, I’m stuck’

 

‘LUFFY!’

 

‘How dare you hurt our brothers’ Hatchan yells, drawing attention away from the rubber brained idiot and back to the tentacle armed idiot as well as the other fishmen

 

‘Looks like we’re going to have to show you the error of your ways’ Kuroobi sneers

 

‘As well as the inferiority of your species’ Chew adds as he steps up

 

Arlong chuckles ‘Good luck boys, have fun squashing these bugs’ he says, somehow managing to use the rubble he was sitting in like a throne.

 

**Zero Vision : Hachi Ink jet**

 

The others jump out of the way but Luffy’s pinned legs meant he took the full brunt of the octopus fishman’s attack, now blinded and flailing around he couldn’t stop Hatchan from picking up some of the wreckage of Arlong Park and slamming it down on him… or at least trying to. Just before it hit the ground the stone shattered, the smoke clearing to reveal Sanji had kicked it, a look of mild annoyance on his face

 

‘Looks like I picked one hell of an idiot for a captain’ he sighs, getting nods from the rest of the crew while Luffy gushes about how awesome the chef’s last attack was ‘Though at least this idiot is better than thugs who pick on a lady’

 

‘A lady?’ Kuroobi scoffs ‘You’re here risking your lives over one lousy girl?’

 

‘Technically we’re risking our lives to get back our navigator, the fact she’s a girl is unimportant’ Kaos butts in, already beginning to spin his blade in dagger form, while Sanji’s frown grows

 

‘Say one more bad thing about Nami and I promise you you’ll go from fishman to fish sticks before you even blink’ he declares, waving his cigarette in his direction

 

The ray waves him off ‘You might be a skilled human but that’s all you are, and a chivalrous pirate seems quite phoney to me’

 

Sanji takes another drag ‘I’m good at what I do, be it cooking or kicking ass, and there’s nothing phoney about helping a beautiful lady, it’s just how I was raised’

 

Kuroobi cracks his knuckles ‘Guess I’ll have to show you your place then, kneeling before your betters’

 

Meanwhile, as this was going on Usopp was trying to free their idiot captain from his self induced captivity… with poor results.

 

‘Nope, still here’ Luffy says in a _‘discussing the weather’_ tone, even as Usopp struggled and pulled

 

‘This will only end poorly’ Kaos says, the sniper stops reversing in order to look up at the purplette’s grinning mug

 

‘What do you mean?’ he asks

 

‘If nothing’s happening on Luffy’s end then you’re not pulling him free, you’re stretching him out’ Usopp pales as he realises what the older pirate meant… unfortunately his shock caused him to slightly loosen his grip, just enough that Luffy freed himself the first time he wiggled, flying head first into Chew, head butting the huge lipped fishman with the force of a **Gum Gum Bell** and knocking him on his ass, before springing back to his previous position

 

The fishman glared at Usopp with several tic marks on his head ‘I see now, you really want me to kill you’ he growls, starting to walk towards the coward… who promptly ran off at full tilt

 

 

Arlong growls as he pulls himself to his feet ‘This is taking too long’

 

Kuroobi looks fearful for just a moment ‘But sir if you go on a rampage…’

 

‘I won’t do that, I’ve just come up with a fun game’ he grins, his shark teeth adding to the intimidating/creepy factor

 

‘We don’t have time for games’ Luffy yells as he throws a rubber punch, barely missing Arlong who grabs his wrist

 

‘Did you humans really think you could defeat us?’ he asks

 

‘Actually yeah’ Kaos admits, Sanji, Zoro and Luffy nodding in agreement, which actually surprised the fishmen

 

Rather than respond verbally Arlong slams his fist into the ground… and lifts the section holding Luffy above his head, to the rubber boy’s very loud disapproval

 

‘Did you know eating a Devil Fruit means you can’t swim, but considering your circumstances rubber boy, I don’t think it matters’ Arlong laughs as the rest of the Straw Hats tense

 

**Gum gum Pistol**

 

Ordinarily a point blank punch to the face would do something… a lot actually, but all it got was a mouthful of razor sharp teeth digging into Luffy’s skin, he actually had more luck when HE bit Arlong, as it actually seemed to hurt the bastard if his yell was any indication. It ended the same though, with the sharkman tossing Luffy out of Arlong Park, watching literally sink like a stone.

 

‘Luffy!’

 

‘Ah shit, how long can he hold his breath?’

 

Kaos sighs ‘It wouldn’t matter how long, water drains all devil fruit user’s strength, even if he could hold it for hours his body wouldn’t have the strength/energy to do so and he’ll let it all out pretty quickly’

 

‘Then we need to go get him’ Zoro says tightening his grip on Wado

 

‘Yeah but we’ve still got these guys to deal with and given that they are we can’t let them follow us into the water and we’re sunk’ Sanji agrues until he’s flicked in the forehead ‘Hey!’

 

‘Better plan, you jump in and save the idiot, Zoro and I will deal with these idiots. There are 3 of us so let’s go with it’

 

‘Dumbass, there are 3 of them too!’ Sanji fires back

 

‘Yeah but Arlong’s not going to fight us directly unless he has to, so it’s really 2 on 2 while you get Luffy’

 

Sanji sighs but kicks off his shoes ‘You better be right about this’

 

Zoro grins ‘He is, needle nose has that final boss feel to him’

 

‘Clocks ticking boys’ Arlong cackles as he sits once more, letting his underlings deal with the humans

 

**_ Kaos Vs Kuroobi _ **

 

‘Get cocky like that around a fishman and you won’t last long’ Kuroobi yells, Kaos hopping out of the way to avoid his fins

 

‘Hm, so those things are more than just decoration’ Kaos chuckles ‘Good to know’ but then frowns when he see’s Zoro falter ‘Damn it moss head’ he mumbles

 

‘Oy stop getting distracted! I am a level 40 in fishman karate, a weak human is no match for my punches’ he boasts, aiming a full force punch for the centre of Kaos’ chest but the human catches it

 

**Hundred Brick Fist**

 

**Crunch** _drip, drip, drip_

 

‘Hahaha! See this is what I mean; only a human would be dumb enough to try block an attack from a fishman rather than dodge. Sure you managed to survive but you’ve completely fucked up your hand so you won’t be doing that more than once more’ Arlong cackles, but stops when Kaos starts laughing ‘What’s so funny?’

 

Kaos grins wickedly even as he surveys his injury, despite the armour the spiderweb cracks still welled with blood ‘As Luffy and I used to say to Aunt Dadan when we came home with 14 bells kicked out of us… Should have seen the other guy’ his grin widens when the focus shifts and several people gasp

 

Kuroobi was silently clutching his wrist as he stared at the end, which now more closely resembled patty meat than a functional hand.

 

‘How?’

 

‘As you already knew, I have a Devil Fruit, what you didn’t know was what it is. Arlong and company, you have the honour of being the 1st opponents to know my fruit’s name since Luffy and I left Fushia village’

 

‘What are you?’

 

Kaos laughs ‘I am Serpens D. Kaos, researcher of the Straw Hat pirates and eater of the Suru Suru no mi. I’m the reflect human but personally I prefer mirror master’ he spreads his arms wide, everything from his finger tips to his elbows shifted to a highly reflective, mirror like material/sheen ‘What you felt was my Reflect Armour on full strength. Depending on the amount of power I put behind this ability, I either limit the damage, counteract and in turn negate it entirely on as you can see redirect it right back on it’s attacker. Few things can take as much as they dish out, as your mangled hand clearly shows’ the armour flakes/floats off and Kaos runs at the ray, his right leg shifting and gaining a similar coat, just before he kicks him in the face ‘I can also use it for attacks too’ he says with a twisted smirk before slamming his other knee into Kuroobi’s gut

 

‘This isn’t over human’ he pants, while Kaos shrugs and smirks regardless

 

‘You sure about that?’

 

‘Yeah, Arlong will deal with you, your friend on the other hand…’

 

The rayfishman jumps into the water; Kaos just follows him with his eyes

 

‘You must have had that fruit for quite some time human’ Kaos raises an eyebrow at the shark’s comment ‘Most people would at least try to follow before remembering that they can’t swim and stop. If you don’t even think about it your very subconscious has learnt to avoid the water’

 

Kaos shrugs ‘I’ve had my powers for about a decade now, but that doesn’t always mean much as Luffy has for just as long’

 

 

**_ Zoro Vs Hatchan _ **

 

‘Hey you’re Zoro right, I thought you fought with 3 swords not 1’ Hatchan asks as he barely avoids Zoro’s swing

 

‘Didn’t think I needed them, 1 is enough to turn you into Calamari’ the moss hair grins

 

‘Hatchan pouts ‘That’s rude’ he says as he jumps onto a pillar ‘…and now I’m stuck’ (Damn it, not another one!)

 

‘You idiot, get down from there!’ Zoro yells, waving his sword angrily, then stops, breathing heavily as his chest burns and his knees buckle ‘ _Now is not the time’_

 

‘Nope, hey I know how to get you to fight for real’ he cheers, hopping in through a window (Getting an annoyed roar of ‘HATCHAN!’ from Arlong) and disappearing for a few minutes before jumping back out with a smile ‘You’ll have to fight for real against my 6 sword style’ he exclaims

 

_‘Shit he’s right’_ Zoro thinks before turning to the entrance ‘Johnny, Yosaku, I need to borrow your swords, toss em here’ he yells after placing Wado between his teeth, the bounty hunters turn to one another before nodding and actually do throw their swords at him, but he manages to catch them easily

 

‘Ha, I was right you are Zoro of the 3 swords, but I’ve got more swords so I’m going to win’

 

Zoro scoffs, having so recently seen Mihawk defeat his 3 sword style with 1… he would barely call it a knife never mind a sword, but still it proves the point ‘It doesn’t matter the number, only the weight they carry’ he replies

 

Hachi blinks then laughs ‘If it’s weight you’re looking for your puny human blades don’t stand up to fishman metalworking. My swords are 300 pounds each’ he states proudly

 

_‘That’s not what I… never mind’_ Zoro thinks, seeing the octopus was a simple a straightforward kind of person like his captain, he was sure explaining the concept would similarly go over Luffy’s head too.

 

‘Now prepare to be torn to shreds by my power’

 

**6 blades: Tentacle Sword Overload**

**3 Sword style: Streaming Wolf Swords**

 

Despite the mess that Hachi’s flailing arms/tentacles looked to the villagers Zoro managed to dodge and weave between them all, stopping behind the fishman, just as his own wounds were finally noticed by the dim octopus, blood spurting from each gash

 

‘You bastard, how dare you cut me, well prepare to die from my next attack, no human could survive this!’ he yells angrily, more flailing limbs following his words.

 

**Octopus Pot Stance**

**New Years – Open – Body Slam**

 

Zoro manages to block Hachi’s attempt to skewer him but was unable to predict or counter when he used it as a disarmer to land a headbutt to his still damaged chest and sending him flying into the air

 

‘Ha ha, now I can finish this, you’ll be dead before you hit the ground’ Hachi grins before he starts to spin his swords directly below Zoro

 

**Waltz of 6 Swords**

 

It is tantamount to Zoro’s skill that all sounds of pain came from Hachi, as he landed on his feet and the octopus stood there with wounds littering his entire body, most notable his hands, to the point all 6 of his swords were lying on the ground, though he was breathing a lot heavier than when he began this fight

 

‘Damn it you bastard, how do you keep making me look bad? I’ll kill you for this, I’ll tear you limb from limb!’ Hachi yells, waving his bloodied hands in Zoro’s direction as the swordsman sways

 

**Octopus Pot Stance**

 

_‘Even if this wound would kill an ordinary man, if I’m ever to stand against Hawkeye, and then beat him, I must be more, I MUST BE **EXTRORDIARY**!’_

 

**Dragon Twister**

 

Hachi flies straight up in the wake of Zoro’s attack, his shattered blades falling all over Arlong Park, shortly followed by his broken and bloodied, but still breathing body as it leaves a crater in the ground behind Zoro

 

‘It’s not how heavy the sword is that matters either’ Zoro says, dropping the swords in his hands and sheathing Wado ‘just the weight of your resolve and determination. I have yet to meet another swordsman with heavier swords than I’

 

**_ Usopp Vs Chew _ **

 

Usopp ran like his life depended on it, occasionally turning back to ensure Chew was still chasing him rather than turn back and cause trouble for his friends. Finally he stops in a marshy area of the island

 

‘I think that’s far enough, and will you look at that I lost him’ Usopp grins ‘I guess he underestimates the true power of a coward’ he laughs

 

‘Ahem, you were saying?’ Usopp turns and his eyes shoot out of his skull, as standing behind him was a very angry Chew

 

‘Ah!’ he screams before running away again

 

‘This getting tedious’ Chew sighed ‘Just die you long nosed freak!’

 

**Squirt Gun**

 

**_Red Star_ **

 

Usopp collapses to the ground ‘ _blood_ ’ staining the dirt below

 

‘Hm, after all that, he’s dead in one shot, almost disappointing’ Chew shrugs before beginning to walk back in the direction of Arlong Park. Once he was a reasonable safe distance away…

 

_‘Fishmen are so stupid’_ Usopp thinks as he sits up, wiping the ketchup off his chest

 

‘This is insane, these guys tore a village apart and killed everyone so easily. I know Nami needs our help but I really don’t want to die’ Usopp begins to panic once more, falling back to the ground when he thinks he could still hear the fishman

 

‘Okay so I’m covering fake blood, but I’m still too clean, need to dirty myself up so it looks like I was in a real battle’ he says to himself before rubbing dirt into his clothes and arms ‘I’m sorry everyone I did my bes…’ he stops and thinks of everyone fighting Arlong, everyone he’d be letting down: Luffy, Kaos, Zoro, Sanji, Nami, K-Kaya!

 

_‘Damn it, I can’t just play dead when my friends are out there risking their lives. I will be a brave warrior of the sea one day. And I’m going to start now’_ he stands up and yells ‘Hey Fish Lips!’ at the top of his voice, Chew turning to face him

 

‘Not so dead after all, I’ll soon change that. Chew’ the fishman says before charging at him, basically running through one of Usopp’s exploding Stars and punching him straight in the face. He then walks back over and starts kicking the guy ‘You should have stayed down’

 

**Usopp Hammer**

 

**Usopp Rubber Band of Dooooooom!**

 

The hammer slams straight into Chew’s extended mouthparts, causing him to flinch, not helped as he tenses in preparation of Usopp’s second attack. When nothing came he opened his eyes slowly… to see nothing

 

‘FUCK!’ he yells

 

 

‘Hey catch’

 

Chew blinks in surprise but his reflexes enable him to catch the projectile before it hits him in the face, surprised when he sees the human threw a bottle at him

 

SMASH

 

A shot from Usopp’s slingshot shatters the bottle, showering the fishman in its contents

 

‘This, this is booze’ he says in confusion as he spits out a mouthful ‘Is this the only way you can fight, with cheap tricks?’ he shouts angrily, before sticking his head into the marshy water nearby

 

_‘I can’t run from this fight, but this is the biggest one in my life. If I lose I die, but I need to fight’_

 

**Squirt Cannon**

 

Usopp has to resist yelling in panic as the trees next to him practically exploded due to the fishman’s attack

 

‘This is almost sad how easy it is’ Chew thinks

 

**Squirt machine gun**

 

‘Oh crap, my one chance to be a real pirate and I’m going to die. No I can’t think like that, if I survive this I’m going to be a true pirate, my days of being a coward are over’ Usopp says with a slight tremble as Chew’s water attack pelts his tree, shortly followed by the fishman himself kicking it out of his way

 

‘What was over?’ Chew asks with a sneer

 

‘This fight. Alcohol is flammable’

 

‘Hm?’

 

**Flaming Star**

 

The incendiary shot hits Chew and his body erupts in flames, running around frantically until he remembered the marshes nearby, at which point he barrels in that direction until he finally managed to put himself out

 

‘Ow, bastard human ‘he mumbles into the water

 

‘I’m not done yet’

 

_‘Shit’_

 

**Usopp Hammer**

 

The blow to the back of the head sent Chew face down into the water once more, Usopp grinning with pride ‘I did it, I actually took down a fishman’ he cheers, then screams when Chew groans

 

**Usopp Hammer**

**Usopp Hammer**

**Usopp Hammer**

**Usopp Hammer**

**Usopp Hammer**

**Usopp Hammer**

 

Finally Chew stays down, lumps on his lumps on his lumps on his lumps

 

_ Back in Arlong Park _

 

Sanji and Kuroobi erupt from the water, both lying there for a moment gasping for air, Kaos and to a lesser extent Zoro pull the chef to his feet

 

‘Luffy’s okay for now, damn it psycho you were meant to deal with him!’ Sanji grumbles, but his emotions were muted due to extreme pain

 

Kaos sighs ‘He dove in the water; I can’t follow him unless you wanted to save both of us in the process. Good job for surviving that idiot though’

 

Sanji nods ‘I’m not dying today, especially as I can’t trust you and moss head to keep Nami and Kaya safe’ the blond mutters half jokingly ‘Make sure Zoro doesn’t die while I deal with this dumbass, we’ll need all the men we can muster when Arlong gets off his fat ass to fight us’ the purplette flashes a grin as he lets Sanji go, catching Zoro just before he stumbles again. With that dealt with Sanji turns to Kuroobi, who had finally stood back up but was panting tiredly

 

‘You really think you can beat me just because we’re out of the water? My fishman karate may be weaker above water but it’s still strong enough to kill one normal human (Ha, like Sanji’s normal… shit does that count as a spoiler?)’ he sneers and throws a punch with his remaining hand, but the blond dodges so fast he practically teleported

 

‘You’re a lot slower on land’ the chef notes before kicking him in the throat ‘You think my love is weak, that I can’t protect the people I care about? Let me show you my fiery passion(1)’ he then proceeds to kick the crap out of the ray, even going as far as to call out his targets, but even then Kuroobi was unable to stop him. Even as he prepares his ultimate attack Sanji is unimpressed

 

**1,000 Brick Fist**

 

The punch would probably have killed a human… had it connected. But no, instead the rayfishman was kicked clean through Arlong Park, leaving a crater which he failed to crawl out of

 

‘That’s how you deal with them’ Sanji says as

 

‘Hatchan, Kuroobi’ Arlong gasps, his anger beginning to boil

 

‘Hey guys, I brought down fishlips. Finally we have proof nobody can defeat the might Captain Usopp’ Usopp boasts from the wall, having just returned to the Park

 

‘ _Chew too, what are these people?_ ’ Arlong thinks with just a shiver of fear, before rage drowned it

 

Arlong stands and walks to the edge of the water ‘You bastards, I should have never let it get this far, I should have torn you apart the moment you walked here. Now let me show you the difference in power between us’ he says, filling his hand with water and tossing it

 

TBC

 

LW: Well there we go, Kaos’ fruit is revealed and the Straw Hats held their own against Arlong’s underlings.

For the record what happened under the water between Kuoobi & Sanji as well as what the others are doing to help Luffy is basically the same as canon. Also the 3 fights happened at the same time, partly because I cut out a lot of Ussop’s running away.

 

**_ Techniques and Abilities _ **

 

Luffy

 

**Gum Gum Pinwheel** : Like I said Luffy twists himself up before grabbing the enemy, then he relaxes and because he’s secured himself before using this technique the energy can only go one way… through the enemy as he takes them for a ride, if they’re large like Mohmoo they can even be used to clear the area of lessor enemies.

 

Kaos – Eater of the Suru Suru no mi/ Reflect reflect fruit. Special Paramecia class

 

**Reflect Armour** : The silver/chrome substance that’s been forming on him since the 2nd chapter. Like I said in the chapter it minimises, cancels out or redirects damage by _‘reflecting’_ it back on the attacker. This form of the armour is rather weak though as if the attack is strong enough it’ll simply smash through and reach his body below

 

Zoro

 

**Streaming Wolf Swords** : Using 2 swords to block while in a close range spin, Zoro carves into his opponent with his 3rd sword.

**Dragon Twister** : Zoro spins his swords, causing a dragon-like tornado to form, slashing as well as blowing away his enemy.

 

Usopp

 

**Red Star** : Usopp uses Ketchup to make it look like he took a grevious/mortal wound

**Usopp Hammer** : Usopp carries a hammer… he uses it to strike his opponents when he’s within range (as a slingshot user and a coward, that’s not too often)

**Usopp Rubber Band of Doom!:** One of his _fake out_ techniques, Usopp pulls a rubber band and prepares to fire… then runs away while he opponent is panicing

 

Kuroobi

 

**100 Brick Fist** : Overpowered punch, is apparently strong enough to do severe damage to human and fishmen given a reflected attack basically mangled Kuroobi’s own fist.

 

**1000 Brick Fist** : The strongest attack in Kuroobi’s Fishman karate arsenal, not that it matters given it never connected with anything

 

Hachi

 

**Hachi Ink Jet** : Hachi’s an octopus, so he can spit ink to blind his opponents

 

**_Rokutoryu_** – 6 swords style, made possible by Hachi being an octopus fishman and therefore having 6 arms with which to wield them.

 

**Tentacle Sword Overload** : Hachi charges at his opponent, swinign his swords wildly given how much metal is flying through the air he’s bound to hit something.

 

**Octopus Pot Stance** : Hachi holds his swords out in front of him, blunt edges touching/sharp edges out. He then runs at the enemy, the blades protecting his core from a strike

**New Years – Open – Body Slam** : Going straight from Pot Stance Hachi swings open his arms, leaving his target wide open for a headbutt / body slam, sending them flying into the air

**Waltz of 6 swords** : While in the air, Hachi gets under his target and begins to spin his swords. It should tear anyone unlucky enough to get caught in it to shreds.

 

Chew

 

**Squirt Gun** : Chew spits water at such speed and power getting hit with it is akin to being shot… similar to how Luffy used to say his fists were as strong as pistols

**Squirt Cannon** : Chew fills himself to bursting, then releases it in one attack, the waterball hitting with the force of a cannon ball

**Squirt machine gun** : Rapid fire Squirt Gun attacks, resemble a machine gun in speed and ferocity.

 

(1) One of the benefits of writing a story 19-20 years behind the actual series is I have a lot of material to work with, in this case yes that was a reference to Sanji’s Diable Jambe, which is supposedly created from that fiery passion, or something similar.


	16. Luffy's Great White

LW: Here we go, Arlong Vs Luffy fight!

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Luffy’s Great White

 

There should have been an explosion given the damage it did to the pirates, either that or it should have done almost nothing given all Arlong did was throw a handful of water at them. Zoro went down first due to his previous injuries, with Kaos and Sanji also getting shoved back by the force of the attack, a second handful dropping them on their asses just like the swordsman.

 

‘Fuck, all he did was throw water at us’ Sanji grunts in pain; Kaos nodding in agreement as he slowly sits up, the shark grinning madly

 

Arlong’s attack tore up the eldest straw hat’s shirt, allowing the shark to see his handiwork, even without holes the cracks radiated out of and connecting each spot that he hit still looked like someone had shot at reinforced glass

 

‘I’ll be honest, hitting you with that as well as the other 2 was a gamble, I might have needed to dodge those redirected water attacks’ Arlong admits and Kaos chuckles

 

‘Yeah that’s not something I’ve perfected yet, melee combat is my speciality, the most reliable I could’ve done was redirect the damage, which would just ionise the water. Pointless use of my powers as they say’ he explains as Sanji and Zoro get back up unfortunately so does Hatchan.

 

‘ARLONG!’

 

The fishman looks up ‘Ah Nami, perfect timing, you must be here to see me deal with these useless human trash?’

 

‘No’

 

‘Hmm?’ Arlong raises an eye ridge

 

‘I’m, here to kill you’ she states coldly in a matter of fact tone. Despite that Arlong just laughed

 

‘Kill me, dear sweet Nami, are you even able to keep track of how many times you’ve tried, and failed to kill me since I took you in? I lost count after 30 myself. I’m not sure why it’s failed to enter your brain that pathetic humans like yourself can’t kill a fishman like me.’ He chuckles ‘now I’m not going to kill you, but you’re not leaving this place. You’re going to stay here forever as our cartographer, drawing maps for me, until you die. That’s the plan but I’d much prefer you return to me of your own free will. You can re-enter the fold and become and Arlong pirate again, or I’ll have my fishmen kill every living thing on this island except you and burn that tangerine grove to the ground, then force you to draw sea charts for me. It’s a simple choice Nami, especially for someone who’s supposed to be the 3rd smartest human in the East Blue’ he grins widely ‘I’ll even spare the villagers if you come back to me, they haven’t actually done anything yet after all, though these idiots will have to be killed to set an example for anyone who gets any ideas about revolution. So that’s the choice Nami, will you join me and keep the village safe, or join them in fighting and watch everyone you ever cared about die?’

 

_‘I can’t do this, if I stay with Luffy and the others Arlong will tear everyone apart, but if I join him the village will be safe… but still under his thumb. Fuck!’_ Nami internally screams, hands clenching around the edges of her hat… Luffy’s hat _‘No! I can’t give up, I need to believe they can pull through’_ she breathes in and out then turns to the villagers ‘Well it looks like we’re fighting to the death’

 

Arlong sneers ‘That was a poor decision, but it seems there’s no turning back now’ he was about to advance on the mob when a fountain erupts just outside Arlong Park _‘What? Seriously it’s one thing after another today’_

 

Kaos grins ‘The Captain will see you… well give it 5 minutes’ he chuckles before tossing his dagger, not even reacting when the fishman easily catches it

 

‘This is it? You humans think this puny thing is the legendary Heb… ah!’ Arlong groans as a blade the size of Yoru embeds itself in his right shoulder

 

‘Yes, yes it is’ Kaos smiles as with a flick of the wrist the longsword is forcefully yanked from the fishman’s body, morphing into its khopesh form on the way back. The standing teens look between each other and nod, Sanji jumping back into the water while Kaos pulls Zoro up, the green haired man lightly shoving the purplette away to steady himself.

 

SPLASH

 

‘Hatchan!’ Arlong yells, the octopus getting the message and beginning to charge when Kaos (being the least injured and therefore able to move the quickest) pushed him back with his foot.

 

‘No interfering’ he states, blocking Hatchan’s attack with a buster sword

 

‘Imbeciles’ Arlong growls as he begins to walk towards the pool, back stepping when he catches a flash of steel in his periphery. Zoro stands before him, 3 swords out and ready to fight, even if he swayed a little the longer he stood ‘You’re not going anywhere, and you’re not going to stop him getting Luffy back up here’ he states between ragged breathes

 

‘In the ocean, people with Devil Fruit powers loose even the strength needed to struggle, as well as their powers (Incorrect, at least for people like Luffy as he can still stretch, but he has no control of it himself so Arlong gets half a point), he will die down there’ Arlong says, watching for the moment to strike, the swordsman was good but his current condition left quite a few openings in his technique.

 

**Egg Star**

 

Arlong frowns as he takes focus off Zoro for a second, batting away the egg as if it were nothing

 

‘I got your back Zoro’ Usopp declares… from the other side of the wall to Arlong Park

 

Despite everything Nami smiles _‘They’re all alive, even Usopp’_

 

‘Okay so we need to keep Arlong out of the water until Sanji can get Luffy free, I’ll just stop him from goin anywhere’ Usopp thinks as he reaches into his bag of tricks ‘Hey Zoro, now’s your chance!’ he yells

 

**Usopp Rubber Band of Doom!**

 

‘If I’m taking you down, I’m starting with that big nose’ Zoro declares, swinging straight for the fishman’s face… but the sword was stopped dead on the aforementioned long nose

 

‘Stupid human’ Arlong cackles ‘it’s a proud nose because it’s unbreakable. If you were at full strength, you might have been able to give it a nick, but like this you didn’t stand a chance’ then punctures that statement… by puncturing Zoro’s chest.

 

‘Big Bro!’

 

‘Zoro!’

 

Arlong sneers as he holds the swordsman by his throat ‘That’s all you got then? Too bad, I almost broke a sweat’ his eyebrow raises ‘What’s with all these bandages, did the weak human fall over?’ he taunts before ripping them clean off, Zoro holding in a scream of pain.

 

Arlong stares at Zoro’s injury in a mixture of horror and morbid fascination, ‘ _how was this human even still alive right now?’_

 

‘What are you?’

 

‘Human, but I’m they guy who fought Dracule Mihawk of Walachia, and lived to talk about it’ Zoro answers, voice brimming with pride

 

For a moment the primal fear centre of his mind flared to life, Arlong thinking _‘What the fuck has that ginger bitch dropped on my head this time?’_ before it was ruthlessly buried once more ‘Doesn’t matter, he dies right now’ Arlong says mostly to himself but is confused by the human’s expression

 

‘If a person stays put, their wounds won’t open up’ Zoro smiles despite the pain

 

Arlong norrows his eyes ‘Find something amusing about your situation, besides living a few more seconds?’

 

‘I wasn’t talking about me’ Zoro answers and Arlong’s eyes widen as one thought zips through his mind

 

_‘Shit, Hachi!’_

 

He turns just as Hatchan erupts in a fountain of blood, all his flailing around reopened his wounds, falling to the ground in front of a winded Kaos, who gives the limp octopus man a kick to the head just to be sure, before turning to help Zoro.

 

Before we get that far there was a commotion just outside Arlong Park, followed by one just above it as Luffy shot up into the sky, loudly declaring ‘I’m Back!’ bringing a smile to the faces of his crew.

 

‘Took your time getting back Monkey’ Kaos teases

 

‘Needs a new watch, you’re late’ Zoro grunts, his eyes shrinking to pinpricks when he feels Luffy’s hands on his back _‘Ah crap’_

 

‘Let’s switch’ Luffy yells, pulling Zoro out of Arlong’s grip and using the energy to fling himself towards the shark while sending Zoro a probably safe distance away

 

‘YOU IDIOT!’ was the collective yell of everyone except Arlong at the rubber boy’s manoeuvre, but it was silenced when he started laying into Arlong

 

**Gum Gum Bell**

**Gum Gum Whip**

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

The bell stunned Arlong long enough for the whip to overbalance him, meaning the pistol was able to slam him up against Arlong Park, with…

 

**Gum Gum Gattling**

 

… his final attack sending him through the building

 

‘I forget how strong you are sometimes Luffy’ Kaos muses as everyone else was frozen in shock at the fact Luffy was able to do so much damage to Arlong when none of the others seemed to be able to do anything to the saw shark.

 

A grunt broke the spell as rubble shifted ‘That all you got?’ Arlong taunts as he stands back up

 

Luffy cracks him knuckles and puts on his serious face ‘Nope just a warm up, got to make sure everything still works after my swim’

 

‘You stupid human, you were better off drowning on the ocean floor’ Arlong growls as begins to walk towards the brothers

 

‘Nah I like it better up here’ Luffy replies, doing stretches to get his rubber body back to its usual elasticity

 

‘You can’t even comprehend my anger right now. I watched my brothers get crushed like worms. You don’t understand, but soon you’ll see you should have all stopped fighting a long time ago’ he says with a rumble in his voice, but Luffy seems unconcerned and Kaos actually had the gall to look amused, seriously what are these people? Are they even people?

 

Anger makes most people sloppy, but Arlong had focus, it was just what he focused on was causing as much pain as possible. Using more water as a distinction the moment Kaos brought his arms up to defend himself Arlong put all his fishman strength into slamming his forearm into his face, grinning widely when he hears a crunch and the momentum throws the bony pirate through a wall deep into Arlong Park. Now he just had Luffy to worry about, and this kid was basically a brainless moron so this shouldn’t take too long.

 

‘Do you know the difference between you and I?’ he asks, oddly calm despite his boiling rage

 

‘Is it the nose? The fin? Do you have a tail?’ Luffy asks/offers, confused sweat drops forming on the crowd, while tics formed on Arlong’s forehead

 

‘SPECIES!’ the shark yells, trying to take a bite out of Luffy but the captain dodges, and continues to dodge until he’s backed into a corner and pinned by Arlong’s large blue hand. With his vice like grip on the boy’s chest, Luffy was forced to physically grab his head and move it out of the way of the path of Arlong’s jaws, causing the sharkman to embed his teeth into the pillar behind him. Momentary shock of biting into something much harder than expected gave Luffy a chance to escape and put a little distance between them

 

‘Yeah take that you stupid fishman, with a blow like that his teeth are gonna break… through the pillar!’ Usopp screams the last part in shock as Arlong bites through the pillar, tearing down the section it was holding up.

 

_‘So glad none of us had to fight Arlong up to now, that bastard could bite right through you without even trying’_ Sanji thinks with a healthy does of fear running down his spine.

 

Arlong chuckles before going off on another spiel ‘This is the inherent strength of a fishman, its pitiful how you humans are born with such weak bodies and limited potential. It makes sense for you to bow before me as your genetic and physical superior. We’ve been on a different level to you weaklings from the very beginning but you continue to flail around in the dirt. Isn’t it time for you to just die!’

 

Luffy scoffs and gets into a ready stance ‘Bring it Arlong; there’s no way I’m loosing to a fishman. After all, I’m going to the be King of the Pirates’

 

Arlong scoffs ‘King of the pirates? A punt human like you couldn’t possibly conquer the Grand Line, hell you’re not even going to make it to the Grand Line, you can’t even crush a pillar with your jaws

 

‘So what?’ Arlong was confused by the question ‘Stop bragging about fishy things, you’re not that awesome’ Luffy argues, sending his fist through some rubble ‘Besides breaking rocks with your teeth seems dumb’

 

Tics form on Arlong’s neck ‘Idiot, that’s not the point! Every human on this planet is weak, what good are you if you can’t even pull yourself out of the water?’ he jumps at Luffy once more, but the captain dodges rather swiftly, grabbing some swords along the way

 

‘As it happens I’m worthless without my friends backing me up’ he declares with a smile, further confusing the fishman which probably helps when Luffy starts swinging the swords at him, forcing him to step back with each swing to remain out of reach

 

‘You’re insane, whatever this crap is it isn’t swordsplay, you’re just a child playing pirate flailing those swords around’ Arlong mocks before batting one away with his nose and catching the other in his jaw ‘I hope you realise by now this is no game’ he grumbles around the metal, just before shattering it with a clench of his teeth ‘Enough games, now you die’

 

‘Shut up!’ Luffy yells before punching the shark square in the jaw, throwing him back but also (to Arlong as much as everyone else’s) breaking his teeth.

 

‘You’re right, I don’t know the 1st thing about using a sword besides not holding the sharp part’

 

_‘Where’s this going?’_ Usopp, Kaya and Nami wonder, Sanji knowing this was going to end badly and Zoro was too out of it to care.

 

‘I’m not a swordsman, I can’t navigate, or cook, or lie, really come up with plans, or make portals and redirect attacks. I know if I was doing this alone I’d be dead by now, but with friends, family, nakama we fit together, we cover the gaps the others have in their own skills.

 

Arlong chuckles ‘So you finally admit what a pathetic human you are?’ he asks with a tinge of amusement rather anger for a change ‘You’re an idiot but you’re honest. How do your crew feel putting up with this stupidity each and every day? Bet it drives them half insane, but then it confuses me how much trouble they went through in order to save you, their brainless buffoon of a captain. A half wit like you doesn’t deserve anything, never mind a ship and crew, what could you possibly do that makes you worth their time and effort?’

 

Luffy smirks ‘I can kick your ass. I’m strong and I have a dream, that’s my part of the team fulfilled’ he answers, getting cheers from the mob and slight smiles from the crew

 

‘Cheer all you want, it won’t save you’ Arlong shouts, his broken teeth falling out and newer ones shooting out almost instantly

 

‘Holy crap you got new teeth!’

 

‘I’m a shark, each set that breaks is replaced by another, and each one if stronger than the last’ (Don’t know if that’s how that works, but it sounds good so who cares) he says before yanking out a set just before another grows back ‘Endlessly’ he finishes, pulling out the 2nd and letting the 3rd form, now he had a set in each hand as well as his jaw ‘This is one of the many gifts given to fishmen, which make us greater than any humans’

 

‘That’s so cool!’ (Not the time Luffy!)

 

**Tooth Attack**

 

Arlong leaps at Luffy, using his removed teeth like clamps or shears, trying to snap at Luffy, first being able to dodge but Arlong’s frenzy meant he was bound to hit something eventually…

 

‘Arlong, stop, it hurts’

 

… too bad it was another fishman, Luffy pulling one of the previously beaten minions up as a ‘ _human_ ’ shield, and given he was free of bite marks I’d say it did it’s job perfectly :D

 

‘You stretchy freak! How dare you use one of my brothers as a shield!’

 

Luffy sighs in relief before shrugging ‘Hey, you attacked me remember? Not my fault you weren’t looking where you were snapping’

 

Arlong steamed ‘Don’t you move you little freak’

 

Luffy hums and rubs his chin ‘Now there’s an idea’

 

‘Luffy has an idea’

‘Oh crap here we go again’

 

**Tooth Attack**

 

This time the attacks were… not so much slower just more focused as well as clearly being individual attacks, meaning Arlong was holding back to avoid going frenzy again and risking another of his brother’s to the human’s treachery. Luckily Luffy was still able to pull himself out of the way, for the most part until he sees an opening and kicks Arlong in the face, knocking him onto his back and leaving a large dent in the ground

 

‘ _This kid is making a mockery of me, a mighty fishman!_ You know what, fuck this! Rubber boy’s getting sliced and diced!’ Arlong grunts before punching him way through the wall of Arlong Park (surprised there are still intact outer walls at this point) and pulled out his massive saw sword

 

Luffy’s reaction to this change in tactics was layered, in order it went

 

‘Aw, I wanted to have shark teeth’

‘That’s not a very effective way to get things out of your house’

 

And finally

 

_‘Shit, not so good with sharp things!’_

 

Arlong’s clear lack of care towards collateral damage shows why the others wanted to deal with the StrawHats themselves, Arlong was causing more damage to Arlong Park in a couple of swings than had been done to the building in the entire back to back fights everyone else had done up to that moment, jumping after his prey and swinging his Sawblade with reckless (or maybe just feckless) abandon.

 

While dodging Arlong’s enormous Saw Sword, Luffy hops/climbs his way up Arlong Park until he’s distracted by a plume of dark blue smoke, coming out of one of the windows, wondering if the source would be able to help he bounces in the window, finding himself in a room full of paper, charts and maps.

 

‘Glad to see you finally made it’ a calm voice says and Luffy turned, there at the desk by the window, clear evidence that he shoved the contents to the floor so he could sit down was Kaos, a serpent styled pipe clenched between his teeth, though what bothered Luffy was that the smoke didn’t just come out of his mouth and the pipe but escaped out the cracks in his face and neck, most worryingly one that nearly split his left eye. The only good thing was he could see the cracks were visibly sealing themselves.

 

‘What is this place?’

 

‘At the moment a place to recover, otherwise I believe it’s the map room’ Kaos answers with a heavy sigh, rising just before Arlong crashes through the window

 

Meanwhile on the ground Nami pales ‘ _No, not that room!_ ’ she practically screams in her mind

 

‘There’s nowhere else to run humans’ Arlong says, glass crunching under his sandals ‘It ends here, in the highest level of Arlong Park. It seems fitting you die here considering it was because of Nami you embarked on this suicide mission’

 

Luffy looks confused ‘Hm, why?’

 

Arlong spreads his arms and chuckles ‘This is where I’ve kept Nami, where she draws all my sea charts’

 

Luffy looks around, Kaos already having peeked at everything while he attempted to recover ‘This was Nami’s room’

 

Arlong nods ‘These sea charts are the culmination of the last 8 years of Nami’s life. Even at a glace it should be obvious these maps are more valuable than any treasure. Gathering data on the ocean is simple for a fishman, but translating that information into a useable map is quite difficult, which is why we needed a surveyor. And that’s where Nami came in, in fact it’s her skill in map making that is the sole reason I refuse to part with her, there is no one who even comes close, in the East Blue or even the Grand Line. Her talents are too good for human scum like you, she should be used to build up the mighty Arlong Empire’

 

‘Now listen here little human, Nami belongs to me’ Arlong speaks directly to Luffy

 

‘Is that so?’ Luffy’s response was… empty

 

‘And you’re interfering in our business. Nami isn’t your friend, get that throught your thick skull before you perish’

 

‘I don’t care’ Luffy states flatly

 

‘Nami is our navigator’

 

Arlong grins ‘Oh really, you want Nami to navigate the little dingie of yours? What a waist of her talents. There is nobody in the world who can compare to her skill is map making, letting her go isn’t an option, even less with human scum like you. That girl has a gift and there’s nothing worse than wasting natural talent, which is exactly what would happen if I let you put her on your boat. Drawing sea charts for me is the only way for her to live to her full potential!’

 

‘This pen, is stained with blood’ Kaos notes, holding the offending item by the tip of the feather, his face pinched, showing up the cracks more deeply than before

 

‘In order for me to obtain world supremacy her sea charts are vital. She will continue drawing sea charts for my own ambition, and once her charts give me full knowledge of all the world’s oceans, nothing will stand in my way, we will be invincible. The world will kneel before us, before me. 1st this island, then the East Blue and finally the World! You could never use her like me’ he boasts, seemingly unaware of the growing anger in the room

 

‘Use her’ Luffy repeats, hands clenching around the bloody pen

 

‘Yes, even a worthless human can be of use to a fish…’ he couldn’t finish that sentence as Luffy’s fist slammed into his face; the sharkman just balanced himself before a deep gash appeared on his chest.

 

‘This room is keeping Nami here; it has to go’ Luffy mutters flatly before turning to his brother ‘Kaos, do it’

 

Kaos readjusts his fedora ‘You sure?’ Luffy’s serious face was his answer ‘Okay then’

 

_Click_ **_Whoosh!_**

 

‘Wha–what are you doing?’ Arlong yells frantically as his life’s work goes up in smoke thanks to some indigo flames

 

‘Sacrificing a rather nice lighter to destroy Nami’s connection to this place. Seems like a good deal to me’ Kaos answers with a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes

 

‘You bastards! I’ll kill you ALL!’ he roars, swinging his Saw Sword down on them, except…

 

**Odo no gosuto no boyaketa hansha: Zabimaru**

 

…it clashes with another multitoothed blade, which Kaos uses to shield himself and Luffy

 

‘Too bad so sad, try again next time’ he chuckles humourlessly, sparks fly between both blades rubbing against one another

 

‘How? You’re just an ordinary human, you shouldn’t be able to do this’ Arlong grunts as he tries to push forward but fails

 

‘Luffy and I grew up together; we’ve gone through the same shit. I may not be able to match him in pure physical might, I’m more a technique guy, but I can hold my own just fine against a bastard like you’ he smiles with pointed teeth and for a second Arlong thinks he sees slitted pupils, before his mind if occupied by something a little more important… that being the shark saw had just been snapped in 2. Kaos removes his hat and slips it into his cloak, the frown on his face causing a tiny voice in Arlong’s head to yell ‘RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’ but he ignored it as always

 

‘It’s not enough to simply burn the maps. As long as this room exists Nami will never be free, so it must be destroyed, and the best way to do that is to tear the entire place down with it’ Luffy then raises his foot, shooting it up through the ceiling till it finds open air

 

‘Oh no you don’t!’

 

**Shark Tooth Drill**

**Reflect Armour**

 

Kaos puts himself between Luffy and Arlong, his fruit breaking teeth but his chest still got painfully shredded, at least until…

 

**Gum Gum Battle Axe**

 

Luffy’s foot manages to hit the back of Arlong’s head, bringing the fishman for a ride the rest of the journey to the bottom of Arlong Park, unfortunately the damage sustained from Arlong’s assault earlier, all the damage their previous fights had done to the bottom floor, combined with this were too much for the building and it collapsed in on itself

 

‘LUFFY! KAOS!’ Nami screams as Yosaku and Johnny pull her to safety. Everything was unnaturally quiet for a few minutes as everyone stared that the mound of debris that had once been the intimidating Arlong Park, then there was a soft of shifting rubble.

 

From the wreckage of Arlong Park Luffy and Kaos pulled themselves free, the Captain standing tall and loudly proclaiming ‘Nami! We will always be Nakama!’ at the top of his voice, Kaos smiles softly as Nami cries happy tears

 

_‘Oh Luffy’_ she thinks fondly, with tears streaming down her face as she returns the straw hat to it’s rightful place, after the rubber boy lolloped over at a much more sedate pace than usual

 

‘He won’

‘Arlong Park has fallen’

‘We’re finally free!’

 

In all the commotion another shift of rubble was unnoticed by the villagers. With a pained groan Arlong falls out of the pile and sees Nami and Luffy smiling and happy. He may have more broken than intact bones right now, and probably internal bleeding but he was going to rip that rubber bastard apart before he went.

 

**SHARK…**

 

**Saigo no bīto**

 

A rush of air blows Luffy’s hat off his head, when he picks it back up he notices the look of shock and horror on his navigator’s face. It was then the attack name finally registered in his brain.

 

‘No way, you used that move and I missed it’ he pouts before turning to see Kaos’ handiwork

 

The purplette had a blade embedded to the hilt in Arlong’s forehead and due to the nature of his sword that meant it’s depth/length was unknown and so was the damage. It was enough to hold the entire saw shark’s dead body up, but as he shoved the lump aside and pulled it out it was already on its way to returning to its original form

 

‘If you had been able to watch you would have seen Arlong coming and I wouldn’t have needed to use it. Anyone know if fishmen have spare hearts, just out of curiosity?’ he asks wiping blood of the khopesh

 

Nami shakes her head ‘no, Arlong wouldn’t have kept something like that secret if he did, it would’ve been used as more proof of fishman superiority by him’ she says with a sigh

 

‘Then he’s definitely dead’

 

‘Well, well, well what do we have here? Arlong Park destroyed?’ a familiar condescending jackass makes a reappearance ‘I’m sure you all know pirate loot becomes property of the marines Chichichi’ Nezumi smirks until Kaos moves to the side and he freezes

 

‘Arlong’s dead, if you don’t leave now you’ll join him’ Nami explains bluntly, the rest of the village glaring at him and his remaining marines

 

Nezumi looks about ready to retort when a **Gum Gum Pistol** shot him down the road ‘And stay out!’ Luffy yelled, having had enough of dicks like him and Arlong hurting Nami

 

‘You brat, do you have any idea who you’re dealing with? I’m a marine corporal!’

 

_‘Not for long’_ Kaos smirks while Luffy picks his nose in disinterest

 

‘Do I look like I care? I’m a pirate; Marine’s don’t scare us’ he laughs, before Nami is allowed beat the message into him

 

TBC

 

LW: Well there we go, Luffy deals with Arlong then Kaos makes sure the fish bastard isn’t coming back. Now hopefully the next chapter will appear just behind this, but who knows, I sure don’t at the time of writing this.

 

Techniques

 

_ Luffy _

**Gum Gum Battle Axe** : From what I can tell it’s an enhanced version of Hammer, this one having the power to level a building, mostly because it starts higher and rather than stopping when it reaches level with his body, continues on till it reaches the ground.

 

_ Kaos _

**Odo no gosuto no boyaketa hansha (Blurred reflection of an aether ghost):** His sword transforms into the shape of a famous blade, but as it’s merely a reflection it’s not as powerful as the real thing.

**Saigo no bīto** **(Last Beat):** A rather difficult finishing move to pull off as it requires the blade to pierce both the brain and heart of the target, causing instant death. The name comes from the idea that the attack finishes them off between heartbeats, so their last beat was before the attack began.

 

_ Arlong _

**Tooth Attack** : Arlong attacks with his teeth, be they in his mouth or his hands

**Shark Tooth Drill** : Through unknown means (probably using those special fishman powers he talks about) Arlong spins with his mouth open, forming a whirling vortex of teeth/death.

 

I know it’s a serious situation but did anyone else find it funny Arlong can’t stop monologing about fishman superiority even when he’s underwater and nobody is around to hear him? 


	17. End of a Saga, Last Straw Hat?

LW: I did it, double upload :D Enjoy.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – End of a Saga, Last Straw hat?

 

The party thrown by the people of the island afterwards was insane and intense, (which given it was pretty much a 3 day bender is understandable) more booze than even Zoro and Nami could drink, what felt like thousands of women for Sanji to swoon over & flirt with and entire crowds of people who didn’t know Usopp was a lying liar who lies so listened eagerly to his stories as well as danced along with his singing. Kaos was taking it easy, doctor’s orders but still managed to get some booze into him, while Luffy appeared to have almost 5 types of meat in his mouth at the same time. Finally Kaya was assisting with patching up their swordsman.

 

‘This is a good job don’t get me wrong but you guys really need an actual doctor, there are things well beyond your skills that are a lot more likely to occur given your crew’s members and occupation if you know what I mean’ the doctor comments as they stitch up Zoro’s would before reapplying his bandages.

 

Kaya sighs ‘I know, but I’m all they have and I’m trying to constantly improve my craft in order to stay ahead of whatever insanity Luffy brings to us. Still, a qualified doctor would be nice’

 

‘A doctor, musician, maybe even an archaeologist and artist’ Luffy adds through the window ‘Got any ham melons?’ he asks Zoro reaching up and slamming the window shut with a pained groan.

 

Later

 

Genzo makes his way up the hill, hoping for a moment to speak to Belle-mere but when he got here someone was already there

 

‘You know Miss, I don’t know whether to like you for doing so well raising those girls as well as going as far as to die for them, or hate you because Nami’s kind of a cunt’ Genzo grits his teeth and almost marches over but he contains himself when Kaos continues ‘Still regardless I respect you, for doing all that practically alone. You’re one of the few marines I have no problems with, if fact I actually kind of like you, nice work dear’ Kaos turns and sees the man behind him ‘Hey Genzo, this is the right grave I’m speaking to correct? Belle-mere was Nami’s mother?’

 

The old man nods ‘Only one she ever knew, Belle rescued those girls from a war zone, just after Nojiko found Nami crying in the wreckage. Those 3 weren’t in any way related…’

 

‘Why would that matter?’ Genzo stops at the taller boy’s question ‘You think Nojiko sees Nami any less her sister because they don’t share blood, or that Belle-mere thought them any less her daughters, or either girl think of you as less their father?’ Genzo’s jaw drops but the purplette continues ‘I’ve got no family and Luffy just has his Gramps, but counting each other we had 3 brothers, a big sis and an honorary mama, not to mention nakama. Family doesn’t end with blood, best I can say is it starts with it, what matters is you care’ he gave quite the impassioned speech, his fists clenched tightly.

 

Genzo sighs ‘If you’d let me finish you’d have seen me agree, there wasn’t a drop of blood between them, but they were a family’

 

Kaos laughs and rubs the back of his neck with a slight blush ‘Oh, sorry about that’ he then takes his bottle and empties it over the marker ‘Arlong is gone and the village is free, just because you’re dead doesn’t mean you have to miss out on the celebration Belle-mere’ he sighs tiredly, wringing his hands ‘I know you’ll want a moment alone, goodnight Genzo’ he walks off, Genzo shakes his head and chuckles lowly

 

‘Belle-mere your youngest sure brought some freaks and weirdoes to our village, but it’s clear they care about her and her them. Your girl is finally free to pursue her dreams and it’s all thanks to those guys’ a tear slides down his cheek ‘You’d be proud of who they’ve both become, those little rascals you dropped on our laps’ he smiles sadly, before placing his pinwheel in the ground beside the grave.

 

_ The next morning _

 

Kaos hoped the booze was worth it, having supplied Kaya with the megaphone she was currently yelling at a hung-over Zoro, first for drinking while taking medication, then louder when he told her he hadn’t taken the medication and just had the booze itself. Luckily he was the only one who drank **THAT** much of the people leaving, the others able to get their supplies (including Nami’s money) onto the ship, they were just missing one thing

 

‘Where’s that bloody witch?’ Zoro asks, ears ringing as he shuffles away from the blond

 

‘Don’t know, but we probably can’t wait too long’

 

‘We can’t leave without her’ Sanji yells angrily, the others taking a step back before him and Zoro begin another fight

 

Before anything else can be said there’s a loud commotion, as their navigator ran full tilt towards them

 

‘Open the sails, NOW!’ she yells loudly, the others were confused, except Sanji who loudly protested until Luffy silenced him and told them to do as she said. Because of this the Merry had already started to sail away when she reaches the crowd of villagers, slipping between bodies and finally rolling past Nojiko and Genzo before running/jumping off the edge of the harbour, Luffy and Kaos catching her arms and lifting her onto the deck.

 

‘That seemed really dangerous’ Usopp worries while Nami chuckles

 

‘Not as dangerous as this’ she grins and lifts her shirt, Kaya getting ready to cover Usopp’s eyes but it doesn’t go that high, just enough for about 30 wallets, purses, watches and pieces of jewellery fall to the deck, the pirates not having gotten far enough away to avoid hearing them all yell angrily as they realise what Nami’s parting gift was: She’d robbed/pick pocketed them all.

 

Luffy and Kaos laugh, the purplette using his captain to stabilize himself, Kaya giggled once she was sure Nami wasn’t about to flash them and the rest just stared at her in shock.

 

‘A little something to remember me by, thanks a bunch!’ she yells back to them, grinning widely as she does so.

 

‘Glad you’re back officially Nami’ Kaos smiles as he places a hand on her shoulder… before slamming her headfirst into the wall

 

‘The fuck you do that for you bastard?’ Sanji yells as he launches a flying kick, which the 1st mate just about dodges ‘Nami-swan hasn’t done a thing to y…’ he shuts up when Nami’s fist finds his face

 

‘Stay out of this!’ she practically shrieks, then sighs ‘That was the payback you mentioned before, right?’

 

Kaos nods ‘Taking into account your previous circumstances, it’s just the 1 instead of 3’ he then smiles widely ‘I like the new ink, much cooler than the last one’ he says drawing attention to Nami’s arm. Where once Arlong’s Roger sat like a brand, now a swirling design took it’s place, a stylised pinwheel and tangerine, though the latter part needed to be explained as it wasn’t exactly obvious with everything being blue and all.

 

_ Marine Branch 16 _

 

‘HELLO? HELLO?’

 

‘This is navy headquarters’

 

‘GOOD, THIS IS COLONEL NEZUMI OF BRANCH 16, CODE 00733. I HAVE A REQUEST’

 

‘Um there’s no need to shout I can…’

 

‘THERE ARE 2 PIRATES OUT HERE, ONE WEARS A STRAW HAT AND IS NAMED LUFFY, THE OTHER IS HIS 1ST MATE, THE PURPLE HAIRED ONE, KAOS. THESE 2 AND THEIR CREW OF 7 ARE ENEMIES OF THE GOVERNMENT!!!!’

 

‘Luffy and Kaos, got it’ the clert nods as he writes it down

 

‘THEY MANAGED TO TAKE DOWN THE REPORTEDLY UNBEATABLE FISHMAN ARLONG IN THEIR HOME BASE, THE TALL ONE EVEN KILLED ARLONG HIMSELF! BASED ON THE GRAVE THREAT THEY FACE TO THE PEACE A LARGE BOUNTY HAS BEEN PLACED ON THEIR HEADS! TRANSMITTING PHOTOS NOW’

 

The clerk nods ‘I’ve got them… um are you sure this is a dangerous pirate captain? The other I believe, their evil in his eyes but straw hat…’ the man is both surprised and confused, this grinning idiot looks completely harmless

 

‘Couldn’t you get a better picture than that?’ Nezumi yells at his subordinate

 

‘No, sorry sir’

 

‘ Okay, I’ll have these verified and submitted for approval. Also Colonel, you’re required to return to Marine Headquarters’ the mousefaced marine looked confused on the Den Den Mushi, but sighs

 

‘Of course, I’ll head there straight away’ he grumbles before hanging up.

 

The marine sighs before making another call ‘Commodore Brannew, Nezumi is on his way to Marine Headquarters as you requested’

 

‘Thank you, that will be all’ The green haired man groans and runs his fingers through his afro, while he did find it amusing when a criminal’s own incompetence lead to their capture, it was still a sad day when it was one of their own

 

_ Flashback _

 

_‘Arlong-Sama, mission is akomplished, marine guy is dead just like you asked’ a high pitched, childlike voice called_

_‘This is a secure marine line, how did you get this frequency?’_

_‘I sorry, Mousey-san leant me his Den Den to call Arlong-Sama. He always so helpful to fishmen in Cojo Yakcha’_

_‘Mouse-san?’_

_‘Yep, marine guy with mouse face. He’s always so nice to me and Mari not like other marines, Arlong pay him very well because of that’_

_‘Mari?’_

_‘My cousin Mari. I Cali, we squid fishmans under Captain Arlong-Sama, Mouse-san is a really good friend to us and Arlong-San’_

_ Flashback Ends _

 

He didn’t like exploiting either a child or a simpleton he wasn’t sure which he’d prefer, but either way he had to go with the evidence they supplied, as well as Nezumi’s information on these new rookie pirates

 

**Monkey D Luffy**

****&** **

******Serpen D Kaos** ** **

 

TBC

 

LW: Well that’s that. Just so you know there are reasons for the name of the chapter: 1st, we are really close to the end of the East Blue Saga, just have Loguetown left, as well as the fact all the original Straw Hats from EB have joined officially. Everyone else on the canon crew (as well as the planned future additions) is from/on the Grand Line and will be recruited as we go. I’m sure some people will see them coming but too bad, they’re what I picked.


	18. Straw Hat 1st bounty

LW: Well here’s a minor chapter, just like in the anime itself it’s as the chapter says Luffy and Kaos’ first bounties as well as the reactions from anyone worth mentioning.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Straw Hat 1st Bounty

 

 

_ Marine Headquarters _

 

‘So even our most conservative estimates put them as too much to handle ourselves?’ one marine asks

 

The green haired man nods ‘From our Intel, back when it was only them they defeated Alvida as well as Axe Hand Morgan. And since then there’s no signs of stopping or even slowing down’ he the points to the wanted posters for the pirates defeated by this group

 

Buggy the Clown: 15 million

Kuro of 100 Plans: 16 million

‘Foul Play’ Krieg: 17 million

‘Sawtooth’ Arlong: 20 million

 

‘Not only that but both Kuro and Arlong have been taken out by these monsters, well one of them at least. They also attacked and defeated former lieutenant Fullbody as well as disgraced former marine captain Nezumi’ green afro man then sighs ‘I know these starting bounties seem rather high even on a global scale never mind the east Blue where the average is 3 million, but as you can see, these pirates are that dangerous’

 

_ Going Merry _

 

‘You raised them again?’ Nami asked annoyed at the bird who nodded reluctantly ‘This seems a little expensive don’t yah think’ the bird shrugs, the prices weren’t in it’s control, which Nami knew but liked to vent ‘Fine here you go, but it gets any higher and I’ll stop paying’ the bird nods before letting Nami have her paper and flying off. Meanwhile Usopp was working on developing new ‘stars’/ammo for his slingshot, Kaya was basically cloud gazing and Zoro was doing what he does best on this ship… sleeping. As for the other 3… well we’ll get to that in a minute.

 

‘ _Ha, I’ve almost finished my newest marvel, the Tabasco Star. An eyeful of this and the enemy will be begging…_ ’ Usopp didn’t get to finish that thought as Luffy was tossed into him by Sanji, splashing the sauce all over his own face and feeling like his tear ducts were filled with molten magma (SAKAZUKI!)

 

‘Ah come on, I just want one of them, this is my ship so it’s my stuff’ Luffy complains loudly, seemingly oblivious to Usopp’s screams of pain… apparently so was Kaya as she hadn’t come over to check on him yet.

 

‘No, this is Nami’s tangerine orchard, I won’t let a single fruit be tak…’ the cook proudly proclaims until he gets slammed face first into the deck by a mildly annoyed Kaos, who picks 2 tangerine and tosses one to the hungry Luffy

 

‘Thanks’

 

‘Don’t worry about it’ he smiles, though quickly moves to the opposite side of the ship to the cook before he wakes up (For simplicity: Zoro and Kaya are at the front, Sanji is in the middle with the tangerines, and Usopp, Nami, Luffy and Kaos are now at the back). All was right with the world until Nami sees the pages that fell out of her newspaper

 

**YOU DUMBASSES!**

 

That shout got the guy’s attention, as well as Kaya as she was worried Nami was going to hurt one of them … again

 

‘You’ve gone and done it this time’ she growls, passing 2 pages to the brothers: Luffy’s had him with his signature ‘D’ grin, looking like he was having the time of his life, while Kaos’ had a rather disturbing slasher smile, his eyes nearly glowing with glee.

 

**‘Straw Hat’ Luffy: 38,000,000 beri**

**‘Mirror Master’ Kaos: 42,000,000 beri**

 

‘See that Kaos, we’re wanted men!’ Luffy cheers, bouncing around while Kaos chuckles

 

‘That’s probably the highest active bounty in the East Blue, and you 2 got it on your first try’ Zoro says in both shock and slight amusement, having learnt by now nothing is ever normal or straight forward with his Captain or 1st mate

 

‘But why’s Kaos’ higher? Shouldn’t Luffy’s be more because he’s the Captain?’ Kaya asks and Kaos shakes his head

 

‘Not exactly, Luffy has fought Alvida, Buggy, Kuro, Krieg and Arlong as well as their crews and with the exception of Alvida and Krieg so have I’

 

‘But that should still mean Luffy should be higher, as he beat up more pirates then you’ Usopp adds

 

‘It’s because he’s more dangerous than rubber boy cause he’s fine with killing’ Sanji pipes in ‘In case you forgot while Luffy took down all those people, Kaos took out both Kuro and Arlong, plus I get the feeling they take Devil Fruits into account with the bounty, so the Special Paramecia class **Suru Suru no mi** , is worth more than the normal Paramecia **Gomu Gomu no mi** ’ at this the gang nod in understanding, then Nami hits both of them.

 

‘Idiots! You just had to piss off the marines and now we’re wanted by the government’

 

‘Well we’re pirates, what did you expect?’ Nami opens her mouth to argue but gives up as she literally has no argument.

 

‘There’s another problem, with 2 people on board with a price on their heads they’ll attract bounty hunters, and with a combined total of 80 million they won’t be like Johnny and Yosaku, they’ll be real hunters, they’ll be good’ Zoro states seriously.

 

‘Sounds like an excuse for more training’ Kaos teases

 

‘Not an excuse, an opportunity’ Zoro replies

 

 

_ Foosha _ _ Village _

 

‘Did ya hear the news, those boys are wanted men’

‘Well will ye look at that, some damn good pirates came out of our tiny little village’

 

‘They’ll bring hell down on this village’ Mayor Woodslap complains as he walks into Makino’s bar and sits by the counter

 

‘So you always say, but you got to admit, they sure look happy’ she smiles, still trying to decide where to put her honorary family’s wanted posters up, she’ll have to move Ace’s poster to somewhere that’ll fit all 3 that’s for sure.

 

The mayor sighs before nodding ‘I guess you’re right, and those 2 might just fulfil those crazy plans of theirs’ he mumbles, accepting a drink from the still smiling woman.

 

_ Baratie _

 

Zeff smiles as he looks at the wanted posters he stuck to the stairs ‘Those idiots are really doing it, I hope the boy gets to live out his dream and find IT, as well as a woman who’ll actually put up with him’ the old pirate grumbles, not even in his head would he admit he was worried about Sanji, though given the small smile on his face he was happy they were all still out there on their adventure.

 

_ Somewhere on the Grand Line _

 

Mihawk beaches his little boat with his usual air of disinterest, his reputation (or maybe the huge ass black sword on his back) parting the pirates like the red sea

 

‘Why are you here Hawkeye?’ one asks with a shake in his voice

 

‘Calm down, now tell me where your captain is, my business is with him’ he commands with his usual even tones, the man nods and runs along, Mihawk following as a steady pace _‘Camping out on an island, what a carefree man’_

 

The lower ranked pirate rushes to where the stronger/more important members were all sitting like his ass was on fire ‘BOSS! BOSS!’ he yells as he reaches them ‘Hawkeye, he’s here’ he says, then yelps as he realises the man was right behind him and scuttles away

 

‘So what brings a Shichibukai to this island, Drac?’ the man asks with a small smile

 

‘I thought you’d be interested in the newest bounties to come out of the East Blue’

 

One of the man’s newer companions snort ‘The East Blue’s full of weaklings, nobody worth anything would come from there’

 

Mihawk’s lip curls ever so slightly ‘I wouldn’t be so sure about that’ he says, passing the bounties to their boss, who takes one look at them and his jaw drops

 

Ben pushes his mouth closed before Shanks jumps up and cheers ‘Luffy’s 1st bounty! And so much too. Kaos you sly bastard out performing your captain, that’s not very nice’ he laughs and Mihawk smiles

 

‘I thought you’d like that, you never stop talking about them when you have the chance to’ he says as if it were unimportant, though it wasn’t

 

‘You bet I do, oh men we’re celebrating, those kids from Fushou village just broke 80 mill on their 1st bounty. 3 cheers for Luffy and Kaos’

 

‘But sir you were just saying you’d never drink again’ one of the pirates points out

 

‘Also wasn’t he hung-over a second ago?’ Mihawk asks Ben who nods with a chuckle

 

‘That was before I had something to celebrate’ Shanks dismisses, then practically bounced in front of the swordsman ‘don’t think you’re getting away that easily Hawkie’ he grins ‘You need to stay and drink with us’

 

‘I really shouldn’t’

 

‘I insist, you’re not leaving until I get at least one drink into you’

 

‘Fine, but there better be some good drink on this island’ Mihawk grumbles

 

‘Always is Hawkie, for special occasions such as old friends dropping in or seeing younger old friends fulfilling their dreams’

 

Ben reads through the information on Luffy’s bounty ‘Hey Yassop, looks like Luffy has your kid on his crew’ the 1st mate yells, the sniper immediately running over

 

‘Really? Hm, there might be a lot of Usopps in East Blue, oh why can’t there be a front or side on image of him, he has his mother’s nose so it should be really easy’ Yasop complains

 

‘It’s him, you told Luffy about him enough that Luffy would drag him onto the ship of he had to’ Lucky Roo teases between bites of his huge slab of meat, the other pirates nodding as he did have a point.

 

_ Unknown _ _ Island, Paradise _

 

Retrieving updates from the News Coo, the bone white haired guy makes his way to his captain’s quarters

 

‘Boss, new bounties from the East Blue, they even beat Noire’s 1st bounty by over 10 million, looks like there’s gonna be some new blood entering the Line soon’ he yells, then spins around as he sees captain and navigator were entwined in bed ‘Sorry guys’ he mutters with a blush, the bluenette chuckles before pulling himself free from his girlfriend getting out of the bed

 

‘Cen, the bounties’ he asks, the boy smiles sheepishly before passing them over ‘Interesting, hey love what do you think?’ he holds out both to the beauty, who’s smirk is almost reptilian

 

‘2 more D’s on the waves, what a time to be a pirate’ she chuckles, slipping herself out from the covers and reminding Morgan why he always had his blade on his hip when they were off the ship; Noire was a true Grand Line darling, tall and thin with a perky H cup bust.

 

‘True, just like Aunt Grima said: When there’s a D around, things sure aren’t boring. Makes me glad we’re heading in this direction, might meet these guys while we’re out and about. Might even have time to stop by Alabasta if we’re lucky’

 

Century laughs before turning glad both his crew mates were at least decent at the moment ‘Should I inform our gunner we’ll be passing her hometown then?’ he asks, watching the captain smile widely

 

‘Yep, best keep the demolition expert of this place happy, stops the mutinies’ he jokes, eyes half lidded as Noire runs her long fingers through his hair ‘We might even find a new crewmate along the way’ he hums, while the silver haired girl rolls her eyes

 

‘Really love, Paradise is nothing compared to the New World…’

 

‘And anyone strong in the New World is a high ranked marine or part of a Yonko’s crew’ Morgan interrupts ‘If the East Blue can produce 2 30mil plus pirates then there could be some surprises in Paradise’ he punctures with a kiss which she happily accepts

 

_ Amazon Lily, Calm Belt _

 

The door clicks open but the purple haired woman doesn’t react, she’d been under house arrest nearly 20 years, long enough she didn’t get visitors, least not anyone she actually wanted to see. As she continues her work she spies out the corner of her eye an old woman and a younger one with the overall appearance of having a pole made of kerioseki shoved up her tail hole. The purplette smiles slightly, if it weren’t for the fact they were full blood sisters she’d think the black haired woman was a snake neck, ironic given their middle sister’s name.

 

‘So darlings, what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?’ she asks with an air of disinterest, not difficult when her sister always seemed to drain the fun out of the very air around her, she’s think it a Devil Fruit power but she was the only sibling who could still swim.

 

‘We thought you’d like to see something, a disturbance in the East Blue’ the old woman says, dropping some paper onto her desk. She gives an overdramatic thanks before unrolling the page… and her eyes practically fall out of their sockets

 

‘You know who this is don’t you?’ she asks, a playful smile crossing her lips ‘ _He takes after me more than you’d like to admit, not that you ever would have_ ’ she thinks, less at the bitch to her left and more the one she has no way to contact

 

‘Of course I do’ the taller one scoffs, her haughty demeanour increasing exponentially, much to the younger one’s irritation

 

‘Anything worthwhile to tell me, besides the fact he’s also a pirate?’ she asks, fiddling with her ponytail

 

The old woman contributes for once ‘The other page is his captain, there’s already talk of him throughout the East Blue and a little on the Grand Line, seems pretty confident he’ll be the next King of the Pirates’ the taller woman rolls her eyes as if the concept was laughable, though it was the younger who actually laughs

 

‘ _His parents genes, combined with a Monkey for his captain, they’ll be here in no time_ ’ she thinks before finally releasing ‘Sesesese’ she hisses before breaking out into full blown cackles ‘ _Come find me little one, I’d like to see who stands in this generation_ ’ her thoughts continue to ramble, the visitors sigh and leave her to her musings, not seeing her watch them with calculating eyes as they lock the door once more, nor the 6 inch crater her bare foot managed to kick into the floor.

 

He’s coming, she could see it, both of them were, she needed to be ready but she always worked well under pressure, and if she couldn’t do this simple task in the time it took them to reach this island she wasn’t worthy of the name…

 

**_Serpens D. Shaula_ **

 

_ Unknown Location _

 

‘Hey Sabo, we got some big bounties coming out of the East Blue’ the blond looks up from under his hat, eyebrows raised in confusion

 

‘Seriously?’ he asks, taking the pages and scanning them, a twinge of pain behind his eyes as he does so

 

‘You okay?’ the red head asks

 

Sabo nods ‘Yeah Koala, I’m good. Think we should tell the boss, he is in the East Blue at the moment?’ she waves it off with a shrug

 

‘Nah he’ll be fine, whatever security measures they’ll use on these 2 won’t catch him, especially not given who he’s there meeting’ she replies, Sabo nods, but frowns as he looks back at the pages, there was something familiar about those guys he just couldn’t place them.

 

_ Moby Dick, current location unknown _

 

‘Hey Ace, you’re brothers are named Luffy and Kaos right yo?’ a man with blond hair arranged like a pineapple calls over, having just received the newspaper from the Coo

 

‘Yeah that’s them, man do I miss the cry-baby and the crazy sometimes. Why?’ asks an energetic, shirtless man wearing a cowboy hat

 

‘They made it, so to speak’ Marco answers with a grin, passing it over to Ace who’s eyes nearly fall out of his head

 

‘POPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’

 

Whitebeard groans, he may be the strongest man in the entire world, but he’s really old and likes his naps ‘What do you want Ace?’ he mumbles sitting up

 

‘My brothers, my youngest said he’d set out when he was 17, he’s trying to be the King of the Pirates. Marco just handed me these, my brothers got their first bounties and damn are they big’ Ace nearly gushes as he giddily hands them over to the old man, his eyes widen and his brain cuts out for a second

 

‘You never said your brothers were a Monkey and a Serpens’ he says flatly, Ace looks confused

 

‘Sorry? Is there something wrong?’

 

Whitebeard chuckles but shakes his head ‘No son, just explains how they’re that strong. They’ll do good, don’t know if the boy is King Material but it’ll be a good fight anyway Guraguraguragura’ he laughs, knowing things were about to get shaken up pretty soon, and it was going to be a lot of fun to watch

 

TBC

 

Well that’s it for this week, hope you enjoyed my little interlude.

 

So yeah might have a running thing that at the end of each arc/saga I’ll have a little tally for the Straw Hat bounties, as well as a combined total for the crew itself, in this case I’d place it at the end of Loguetown when they official head for the Grand Line.

 

1 last thing, most people translate beri to be equal to yen, so I decided to use that to translate Luffy and Kaos’ current bounties into euro, simply because it’s the one I use, and here we are:

 

Luffy: €286,520.00

Kaos: €316,680.00


	19. The beginning and the end: Welcome to Loguetown

LW: Okay we’ve made it to Loguetown, might as well do this properly, also while you can use anyone you want for this narration I think Luffy or Rayleigh are the most appropriate:

 

**_Wealth, fame, power, the greatest treasures and the most freedom. The Pirate King. GolD Roger, the man that name describes, before his death by the hands of the marines had these last words ‘My fortune is there for the taking but you’ll have to find it first. Don’t worry I left everything I own in One Piece’. Since that day pirates from all 4 Blues have set sail for the Grand Line, seeking out the One Piece, and the prestigious title of King of the Pirates!_ **

 

LW: Well that’s my intro done; surprised it took me 19 chapters to do that. Also one last thing before we start this chapter

 

Disclaimer: One Piece is owned by Oda, Kaos is mine, several characters throughout the story are my versions of other characters.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – The beginning and the end, Welcome to Loguetown

 

_In, out, in, out, in, out_

 

‘What’s he doing?’ Nami asks, with Loguetown in sight and about 15 minutes away from the she was watching as Kaos sits in Luffy’s usually thinking position in a meditative pose. Rather than answering her Luffy asks his own question

 

‘What we got?’ he asks smiling, to which the purplette turns and smiles slightly

 

‘4, maybe 5. Buggy was a surprise as well as something that feels familiar but different; Buggy must have found one for his crew since we last met. The problem is I can’t get a further read, it’s like peering through thick smoke’ he frowned at that last part ‘But it’s a thin veil, feels like if I managed to pierce that shell I’d be walking headfirst into a hurricane’

 

Luffy nods 'Well time to find out, here we go!’ he yells cheerfully, getting everyone’s attention

 

_ A few minutes later _

 

‘Okay, we’re just reached the port of Loguetown, everyone know what they’re doing?’ Nami asks as everyone gathers on deck

 

‘I need to pick up 2 new swords, no way I’m heading to the Grand Line at anything less than my best’ Zoro answers with a sigh, hand caressing Wado’s hilt

 

‘I’m in charge of food’

 

‘I’ll be trying to get some tools to improve my stars and keep Merry up to scratch’

 

‘I’m bringing Kaya to find her some better guns, probably revolvers’ Kaos says as he pulls the blond toward him, the girl blushes but giggles none the less

 

‘I want to see where GolD Rogers was executed’ Luffy exclaims, rounding off the crew

 

‘Okay, now remember this is our last stop before the Grand Line so grab anything we’ll need but also keep an eye out for marines, especially you 2 Wanted idiots’ Nami glares at the brothers, still not happy about that

 

‘Yes Mom’ the 2 reply flatly, before making a hasty retreat from their navigator’s wrath, Kaos pushing Kaya ahead of him in the direction of the nearest weapons shop.

 

_ Kaos & Kaya _

 

‘Here we are’ Kaos grins as they enter, the bell jingling as they did so

 

‘Ah, how may I help you?’ the man at the counter asks

 

‘Um, I require 2 revolvers’ Kaya answers, the freezes ‘you’re the one who suggested them, what kind did you say?’

 

Kaos’ smile grows ‘Ocelots Miss Kaya, the plan was to deck you out in dual Ocelots’ he explains and the shopkeeper scoffs, while these 2 weren’t exactly scruffy and the taller one had a fancy cloak they sure didn’t look like the sort who could afford an Ocelot, never mind 2, plus they didn’t look like or hold themselves the way the marines he usually outfitted do. This means they’re either pirates, bounty hunters or mercenaries, something that had been springing up a lot since that pirate crew turned in their Jolly Roger and became a mercenary company or PF as they’re called on the Grand Line.

 

‘Really, and how will you be paying for them?’ he asks with a slight sneer

 

**_Crash Bang Clatter_ **

 

His eyes widen at the number and variety of blades, firearms and even a few armour pieces the purplette lays on his table

 

‘I was thinking we could see how much these were worth, then use berri for the remainder’ Kaos replies with a slasher smile

 

The man swallows ‘Give me a moment to tally this up’ he mumbles after retrieving the desired weapons

 

_ Later _

 

Thank you for this, I’m sure we’ll do business here again if we’re ever back in Loguetown’ Kaya says with a smile and a slight bow while Kaos gets the door

 

_ZZZ pura, pura, pura, ZZZ, pura, pura, pura._

 

The reflect human freezes and smiles widely ‘That what I think it is?’ he asks

 

 

_ Luffy _

 

Luffy was a boy of many talents, navigation on land or sea aren’t on that list. This is probably how he ended up at the docks when looking for the execution platform… which was in the centre of town.

 

‘I’m here…. But where the hell am I?’ he sighs in annoyance before seeing someone how might be able to help.

 

The man in front of him was tall and sturdily built, short white hair, furred cuffs on his marine jacket that was left open to expose his muscular chest as well as the bandolier of cigars he wore, not counting the 2 in his mouth. He also wore a jute on his back.

 

‘Hey mister, do you know where the execution platform is?’ Luffy asks loudly

 

Smoker’s eyebrows raise in surprise, this kid in a straw hat just walks up to him and talks, sure it was kind of nice to see a civilian not on the verge of shitting themselves when they see him walk past, but it had been so long the change was still a shock ‘Over that way kid, just follow the smoke’ he answers, gruffly, a poof of smoke escapes his cigar and forms a trail to follow

 

‘Luffy grins ‘Thanks Mister’ he says before running off _‘What a nice guy’_

 

_‘Weird kid’_ Smoker thinks before one of his subordinates runs up to him

 

‘Captain Smoker sir! We finally have the bounty posters of **_Mirror Master Kaos_** and **_Straw Hat Luffy_** ’ he announces, holding the posters up to Smoker’s face

 

_‘Hm, that one looks like a psychopath, while the other…_ Shit! _’_ Smoker curses as he turns and heads in the direction Luffy ran off ‘Hey kid, get back here!’ he yells, the other marines follow in confusion

 

_ Zoro _

 

Zoro stepped into Loguetown with one goal in mind: replacing the 2 of his swords Mihawk shattered back at the Baratie. The problems were he had no idea where he should go to buy swords and lacked the navigational ability to get to it even if he knew where he was meant to go. It was because of this he ended up nearly walking into 2 things ganging up on a dark blue haired girl, catching the tail end of the conversation about how this had something to do with their boss so Zoro assumed she had done something to piss these guys off, as seemed to happen a lot with his own crew, captain most of all. When they tried to attack her though Zoro reached for his last sword, but the girl draws her own and takes them down with skill Zoro hadn’t seen in a while

 

_‘The chick’s good, if I had time I’d probably try ask for a spar with her’_ he thinks with a small smile, just before the bluenette trips over her own feet and falls, glasses bouncing off the cobbles (oddly enough this reminded me of something that was said about Zoro himself, he has great battle awareness or whatever you’d call it, but he has really shitty special awareness or navigational ability outside of combat)

 

Not seeing a reason not to, Zoro walks over and picks up the glasses as the clearly half blind girl gropes around for them on the ground ‘Here to go Mi…’ Zoro freezes as she looks up in the direction of his voice: without the glasses, sure there was the obvious age difference but taking that into account she was a dead ringer (opps) for… ‘ _Kuina! But how?_ ’ he thinks, the glasses slipping from his limp fingers, only the click when they once more hit the ground again brining him out of it ‘Sorry, here are your glasses’ he tries again, looking anywhere but her face so as not to get distracted

 

‘Thanks, it’s Tashigi by the way. So what are you in Loguetown for?’ she asks after introducing herself, Zoro accepting the hand and nod

 

‘Looking for swords’ he answers, vague but direct which actually described his goal in the first place

 

‘Oh, there’s a good store just for that over there’ Tashigi points in the direction Zoro had just come from, trying to avoid cursing he nods and expresses his thanks to the bluenette and walks over to the store. When he goes in there was a man with a bright red nose snoring on the counter, so Zoro rings the bell till he starts to move.

 

‘Oh hello what can I do for you?’ the man asks a little groggy but at least attempting to be friendly

 

‘I’m looking for 2 swords and I have 100,000 beri to spend’ Zoro states, glad disappointed at how little money he’d managed to save, but there was no way he was going to borrow from his witch of a navigator, especially not with the loan shark smile she’d been giving him the since they decided to stop in Loguetown.

 

Ippon-Matsu scowls, great another scint bastard ‘Go through the barrel over there, they’re all about 50,000 beri each’ he grumbles, but freezes when he sees the sword on Zoro’s hip _‘Could it be? A ranked sword in the hands of this nobody._ Hey can I get a look at that sword of yours?’ he asks trying not to blow it

 

Zoro shrugs ‘Sure I guess’ he says handing it over.

 

Ippon-Matsu unsheathes Wado and practically explodes inside ‘ _Okay, keep it cool, you can do this._ This is a pretty nice sword you got there, interested in selling? I’ll give you 200,000 beri for it’

 

‘What! Are you kidding me?’

 

‘Okay, I’ll give you 250, no 300, this sword for 500,000!’

 

Zoro groans ‘Just give it back here, I’m not selling’ he grunts, grabbing the sword.

 

‘Stobourn bastard, I’ll give you 650,000…. No wait, final offer, 800,000 beri’

 

The shop bell distracts them, as does the new customer ‘Hello? Is my **_Shigure_** done?’ Tashigi calls as she enters, then her eyes light up when she sees the sword ‘Is that? Could it be?’

 

_‘No! She’s going to ruin everything!’_

 

_‘What’s she talking about?’_ Zoro thinks as Tashigi flicks through a pocket book she had on her

 

She grins widely ‘There it is, the **_Wado Ichimonji_** , O Wazamono grade, it’s worth at least 10 million beri’ she explains while the store owner steams

 

Zoro nods ‘Makes sense, but I’m still not going to sell it’ he says, returning it to its sheath on his hip ‘By the way, if you were coming here anyway why didn’t you walk with me?’ the swordsman asks curious

 

‘Oh seeing you knocked a thought free in my head, reminding me I had to get back my Shigure from this place. Speaking of…’ she didn’t get to finish as the sword was roughly tossed to her

 

‘There you go ye loud mouth and don’t come back, you just cost me a lot of money you idiot’ Ippon-matsu grumbles, Tashigi flailing with Shigure and crashes into a stand holding more swords ‘Well as you heard you got a pretty good sword, shame it’s in the hands of someone who won’t apriciate it. There are a large collection of barrel swords for you to choose from for 50,000 a piece, take any 2 you like’

 

‘Asshole, what’s his problem’ Zoro grumbles as he approaches the barrels, then spots Tashigi was still in the shop ‘Hey, you’ve got quite the eye for swords; want to help pick some for me?’ he asks, the bluenette blinks before answering

 

‘But you already have a sword, a really good one at that’

 

‘Yeah, but I use Santoryu, one isn’t going to cut it’ he answers

 

‘3 sword style, like that pirate hunter, Roronoa Zoro?’ Tashigi asks to which he nods ‘He’s known around the East Blue for his skills, but he’s not a good person. A man who uses his swords like that is one without honour. It’s messed up and makes real swordsmen look bad, pirates and bounty hunters as swords masters, it doesn’t make any sense’ she sighs

 

Zoro chuckles to himself ‘The world is always messed up, even in a place as quiet as the East Blue’ he replies, before freezing for a second and pulling out the sword, getting the other occupants attention

 

Tashigi gulps ‘That’s one of the Kitetsu swords, they’re all at least Wazamono grade, what’s it doing here?’

 

‘Because it’s cursed’ Zoro answers before the owner could ‘That’s what it says in that book of yours, that all the Kitetsu blades are cursed I presume’ she looks back to her booklet and nods ‘Great, I’ll take it’ Zoro declares, shocking both the others

 

‘I can’t sell you that sword. The bloodlust of the Kitetsus have drove so many others to madness and a gruesome demise if I sell you that sword and it kills you I might as well have killed you myself’ he yells before getting bonked on the head

 

‘Just let him buy the sword’ the woman behind him argues, though Zoro ignores them as he unsheathes Sandai Kitetsu.

 

‘Let’s see which is stronger, the Kitetsu curse, or my good luck’ he grins widely as he tosses the sword into the air, then holds out his arms in its path.

 

Tashigi and Ippon-matsu neatly pass out when the blade tilts around his arm and imbeds itself to the hilt in the floor

 

‘Like I said, I’ll take it’ He smiles, then turns to Tashigi who was just getting back up ‘Can you pick out another for me?

 

‘Um, sure’

 

‘Wait here!’ Ippon-matsu yells before running into the back of the store, quickly returning with something hidden under a tarp, which he removes to show a black handle and sheathed katana

 

‘It has a black lacquer finish and an uneven temper pattern. My shop is small, so this is the best sword I have. This is **_Yubashiri_** ’ Ippon-Matsu explains

 

‘I can’t afford…’

 

‘It’s for free, same as **_Sandi Kitetsu_**. I’m sorry for trying to rip you off earlier, you’re a true swordsman and that is where a weapon like this should be’ he explains, Zoro not fully understanding but knowing enough to smile and accept the offer. It was then he noticed Tashigi staring at him

 

‘What?’

 

‘Nothing, it’s just seeing such high grade swords, it shouldn’t affect me, 1 step forward and another step back’ she says with a deep sigh

 

Zoro raises an eyebrow ‘What does that mean?’

 

‘My dream is to collect all the Wazamono swords, and at least see all the Saijo O Wazamono blades in action’

 

Zoro chuckles ‘Well if you want these swords I’m not giving them up without a fight. Also why give up at the end with just seeing the very best swords? I mean Mihawk’s blade is one for sure but still’

 

‘It’s not Yoru that’s the problem, even if the thought of fighting Mihawk makes my knees knock, it’s another blade that has me state just to see them in battle rather than obtain them. It’s a cursed blade like your Kitetsu, but while that one corrupts, drives insane and eventually kills unworthy wielders, this one will kill you just from touching it. Oh just give me a moment…’ she flicks through the booklet once more, stopping on the right page and showing it to Zoro who pales ‘There it is, the **_Hebi no Oni no mi_** , legendary blade of the Pirate **Mayhem D. Apophis** , Captain of the **_Demon Eye_** pirates’ she explains, pointing to the Khopesh at the top of the page ‘Since his death neither the blade nor his Devil fruit have been seen or even whispered about, but I’m going to find it when it eventually does reappear. After all a sword like that will find someone who’s worthy to wield it eventually’

 

_‘Shit’_

 

TBC

 

LW: So, now we know, Kaos’ weird, shape shifting sword is the legendary _Hebi no Oni no mi_ , you’d think it was something he’d tell us but oh well Tashigi seems like the kind of person who would know this kind of thing. Also yeah it’s not a canon great sword of One Piece, but it is this world version of Serpentello, a blade from other works of mine.

 

Also yeah Tashigi’s plan/dream/goal of taking back all the Wazamono+ swords from criminals is okay on paper but like Zoro says, Mihawk’s Yoru is on Tashigi’s hunting list (because he’s a Warlord, and therefore he must technically be a pirate) … so she’s at least 7 kinds of fucked.

 

If anyone’s curious 100,000 beri/yen is €755, or at least it was when I checked it on Google.

 

** Straw Hat Arsenal updates: **

 

_ Zoro _

 

Wado Ichimonji: O Wazamono grade, sword of his childhood friend Kuina.

Sandi Kitetsu: Wazamono grade, weakest of the 3 legendary cursed swords of Kitetsu.

Yubashiri: Ryo Wazamono grade.

 

_ Kaya _

 

Twin Ocelot revolvers: Don’t know anything about guns; the name is a reference I hope some people get.


	20. Mysterious beauty, remnant from Luffy's past?

LW: More Loguetown stuff, and we finally start heading toward the Grand Line.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Mysterious beauty, remnant from Luffy’s past

 

Loguetown – Town Square

 

‘I finally found it’ Luffy grins as he stands at the bottom of the execution platform ‘ _But how do I get up there?_ ’ he wonders, not seeing any kind of ladder or steps to get up there. Then an idea comes to mind and he laughs before getting into position…

 

**Gum Gum Spring**

 

…and jumping right to the top of the platform

 

‘Well that was easy’ he grins before turning and looking out into the square ‘So this is what the King of the Pirates saw before he died. Nice’

 

Unfortunately Luffy could only be left to his own devices for long as soon enough a man started yelling at him from far below

 

‘Hey you, get down from there!’

 

‘But why?’ Luffy calls back with a frown

 

‘You are standing on a execution platform that belongs to the World Government. Now get down from there right now!’

 

‘That’s not an answer. But okay, as long as you say the magic words, oh and smile’ Luffy replies, grinning as always

 

‘I don’t have time for your games, get down here before I arrest you’ the man goes to take a step toward Luffy when he gets slammed in the back of the head by a large blunt object (hey that was once a description of it’s wielder… Yohohohoho!)

 

‘No one cares what you have to say’ the woman growls before looking up to the Straw Hat ‘Hello Luffy, we meet again’ Luffy blinks and adopts his other default look of confusion (His default expressions are happy and confused if anyone cares) ‘Oh come now Luffy, do you honestly expect me to believe you of all people… have forgotten this face?’ she tilts her head, removing the shadows from her face caused by her cowboy hat

 

‘She’s absolutely gorgeous’

‘An unparalleled beauty’

‘I want to have her babies’ (Couldn’t resist given the lovestruck are men and women in the anime)

 

Luffy strokes his chin while trying to think ‘I don’t remember you and I’m usually good with faces. Are you sure we’ve met before?’

 

The woman chuckles ‘Oh we’ve met, I’ll never forget it. After all you were the first person who ever struck me’ her statement causes the nearby area to turn hostile toward Luffy who gulps

 

‘What are you talking about, I never hit you!’ he yells defensively

 

‘When you struck me with your passionate fist… it felt good’ she smiles, causing the crowd to revert to it’s love struck daze once more ‘Every man I knew before was intimidated to the point of basically being a meek puppy, but you, you gave it you all, and it makes my insides burn with an intense heat only you can quench’ her hips sway and she squirms, causing several people to faint and Luffy to revert to confusion now he was no longer being death glared by everyone

 

‘Tell me, what do you believe to be the most beautiful creature in all the East Blue?’ she asks with a grin (Good thing she said East Blue not the world, cause Hancock’s still better, Robin too :D )

 

‘THAT WOULD BE YOU!’ was the unanimous declaration

 

‘Exactly. There isn’t a man alive who isn’t enraptured by my beauty, but I prefer them strong, like you. I’m going to make you mine Luffy, my little rubber man’

 

The straw hat captain shivers ‘This is so weird, who the Hell are you?’

 

‘You still don’t remember?’ she asks, an air of both annoyance and … disappointment was beginning to be felt in her tone. Luckily the mystery was solved by half of a wandering duo

 

‘Hello Alvida’ Kaos greets with a smirk, which the beautiful mace wielder returns

 

‘While you’re not the handsome pirate I hoped would remember me, hello again Mr. Tall, dark and creepy, and friend’ she tacks on after noticing Kaya in his shadow

 

‘Hey Kaos, where’s Alvida?’ Luffy yells ‘Is she invisible? I know she’s not behind the pretty lady because she’s like 3 times her size’ Kaos face palms, Kaya groans and Alvida barely resists the urge to toss her mace at his face (though a part of her gushes at the fact Luffy called her pretty)

 

‘I’M ALVIDA YOU TWIT!’ she yells loudly, giving Luffy the needed memory trigger to believe her, she yelled a lot the last time they met ‘I ate the **_Suba Suba no mi_** , since we last met, so now I’m silky smooth and even if it cost me my freckles I’m even more beautiful then I was before’ she smiles as she spreads her arms and pushes back the cloak revealing she was dressed in a bikini top, loose fitting pants and sandals, showing her sexy, hourglass figure to it’s fullest, several people in the crowd swooning and fainting.

 

‘Damn it’ Kaya mumbles, getting the attention of a few of the people ‘I was hoping to get some tips from her on getting my skin as smooth as her, but there’s no point if it was Devil Fruit related’ she sighs sadly

 

‘I’m sure I can still give you some tips, you won’t be my level but your skin will be really smooth and silky’ Alvida offers then attention is brought to a loud cough ‘What!?’

 

‘Did you people forget about me?’ Buggy yells, causing Kaya to blush and Kaos to laugh ‘Damn you, men take them down!’

 

Before he could react Luffy finds himself trapped in a stockade by Cabaji, while both Kaya and Kaos found guns and blades pressing against their necks and ribs, preventing them from interfering.

 

_‘Well shite!’_

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

Zoro walked blindly around Loguetown (as usual) happy to once more have the weight of 3 swords on his hip. It was his random wandering that led to running into Sanji, Nami and Usopp, the blond chef … carrying a giant fish?

 

_‘The fuck?’_

 

‘Zoro there you are, well I can see you’ve got all your shopping done’ Nami says as they approach

 

‘Yep. Where’d you get the fish?’ he asks

 

‘Won it in a cooking contest’ Sanji answers, the others nodding as they’d been there (I’ve seen the 4kids version of that episode. Skipping it entirely seemed like a good idea)

 

‘Um, okay then…’

 

‘RUN! THE BUGGY PIRATES ARE ATTACKING!’ was yelled from a crowd fleeing what everyone bar Zoro assumed to be from the town square… where the execution platform was.

 

‘Damn it, not those bozos again’ Zoro complains

 

‘And given our crew those 2 idiots will be right in the middle of it’ Sanji sighs, lighting a cigarette

 

‘Which means Kaya is there too’ Usopp yelps, spurring the love cook into action

 

‘Get the ship ready to leave, we’ll get the captain, the nutter and Kaya-chan’ he tosses the fish to Usopp and alongside Zoro run in the other direction to the crowd, towards the pirates.

 

_ Back with the others _

 

‘And now Straw Hat Luffy will be flashily executed for being a pain in the ass and making me very angry! This is a joyous occasion so be merry boys’ Buggy yells down from the top of the platform, the members of his crew not keeping Luffys companions immobile acting like idiots.

 

‘Neat, I always wanted to see an execution’ Luffy says with a grin

 

‘Well you’re about to have a front row seat’ Buggy replies, smirking down at him

 

‘The wheels turn and Luffy begins to panic ‘What! No not me!’ he yelps

 

‘Yes you, time to end it all! Flashy demise courtesy of the great Buggy the Clown.’

 

‘No stop, please spar my life’ Luffy says, but his heart doesn’t seem in it

 

‘Why would I spar your life? Anyway, look out there Straw Hat; you have quite a big audience awaiting your demise, any last words?’ Buggy spreads his arms and Luffy puffs up his cheeks in concentration as well as simply filling his lungs to their fullest

 

**‘LISTEN! I AM THE MAN WHO’LL BE KING OF THE PIRATES!!’** Luffy loudly declares, Kaos smiles widely, with Kaya and Alvida’s smaller but still present

 

‘No chance rubber brat. Now, on to the main event’ Buggy says, raising his sword

 

‘Stop the execution!’

 

‘Hmm?’ Buggy stops and turns in the direction of the voice, finding Zoro and Sanji just entered the square

 

‘Sanji! Zoro!’ Luffy cheers, Kaya’s smile turns hopeful, while Kaos’ twists into a wide grin

 

Zoro chuckles as he unsheathes Wado ‘Damn idiot, I knew all your antics were going to bite you in the ass one day’

 

‘Wow, what’s with all the weirdos? Starting a side show or something’ Sanji adds ‘Well guess we’ll have to beat our way over to them and rescue our dumbass of a captain eh Zoro?’

 

‘Way ahead of you’ the green haired swordsman replies, having already pulled out all 3 swords and running towards the Buggy pirates

 

‘Damn moss head!’ Sanji growls before joining in ‘Quit hogging all the action’

 

‘Get them men!’ Buggy yells once more, his crew charging straight for the cook and swordsmen and were beaten down quite badly.

 

As well as an actual assistance, Zoro and Sanji’s arrival and attack were the perfect distraction for Kaya and Kaos to reach for their weapons, Kaya seemed unsure as to her methods as some were simply kneecapping while others had much more lethal hits, while Kaos was simply hacking away indiscriminately at the Buggy pirates, as well as a few he punched or kicked through nearby walls.

 

But even with all their skill and strength, Buggy was still inches from their captain, and they never really stood a chance of doing much more than distracting him.

 

‘Guys, thanks for trying, but I’m dead’ Luffy says surprisingly with a smile on his face

 

**_Zap_ **

 

Just before Buggy could remove Luffy’s head the entire platform was hit by a colossal lightning strike causing the structure to collapse in on itself.

 

_ Meanwhile … 8 or so arcs away _

 

Urk, fucking allergies

 

‘Are you alright Enaru-sama?

 

The blond laughs ‘Of course I’m fine I’m a fucking God’

 

‘But sir…’

 

Shut up bubble boy’ he mutters, shooting a bolt of lightning at the man

 

_ Back in the East Blue _

 

‘Wow, that was intense’ Luffy says as he stands up, a little sooty but otherwise unharmed

 

**BANG**

 

Cabaji falls to the ground, his sword not far behind as Alvida hefts her mace onto her shoulder

 

‘So Luffy-kun, any openings on this crew of yours?’

 

‘Sure, welcome aboard Alvida’ Luffy grins and shakes her hand, shocking her as everything slips off her now… except the rubber boy it seems.

 

‘As much fun as this has been maybe we should leave before that storm traps us on this island’ Kaos deadpans, the others looking up at the darkening sky and collectively think _Fuck_ before running at full tilt towards the harbour

 

‘Hey, get back here you bastards!’ a mildly charred Buggy yells after them, just before the marines started to appear from every alcove

 

**Bara Bara Cart**

 

‘Bomb engine, fire!’ Buggy yells as the clown car shoots forward after the Straw hats and Alvida

 

‘Crap we’re never going to get away’ Sanji groans as the marines start gaining on them, as well as the Buggy pirates

 

‘I have an idea, Kaya, grab Alvida’s cloak, or arms round her neck whichever actually works’ Kaos yells back, starting to spin Hebi while they run, the 2 females look to each other before Alvida shrugs and Kaya hops onto her back

 

‘Now what?’ she asks, gulping when the purplette grins widely

 

Kaos hooks his blade into one of Alvida’s belt loops and yanks, causing the smooth human to fly at full speed towards the docks, the mace wielder fearfully forcing her eyes to remain open in order to ensure she didn’t crash into anything, using her mace as a simple form of steering, meanwhile Kaya had no such necessities so thought it much better use of her time was to squeeze her eyes shut, clench her fists into the cloak and scream her lungs out.

 

**White Out**

 

It was probably a good thing they did it though as smoke began to blow into the square and somehow entrap the Buggy pirates, including the clown himself.

 

‘That was helpful’ Luffy chuckles but keeps running so as not to get caught by the smoke himself

 

‘I don’t have time for you small fry’ Smoker growls, his arms fully transformed into a dense smoke ‘Fire!’ he yells, the marines shooting nets into the smoke to capture the pirates. Once they were secured he turned to one of his subordinates ‘I’m going after the straw hat, get me the Smog Hog’

 

‘Which way is the sea?’

‘I don’t know, the rain makes it difficult to tell’

‘Like you had any idea where it was before that?’

‘Nope’

 

‘There they are!’ the marines yelling cut the straw hats little argument as it gave them more important things to do, such as run faster.

 

‘Damn these guys don’t give up, think we should stop and fight them?’ Zoro asks

 

‘We don’t have the time, that storm’s coming in fast’ Sanji replies, then goes gaga when he sees a woman standing in their path ‘And who is this marvellous beauty?’

 

Zoro looks up and groans, he’d hoped Impon-matsu’s shop would be the last he saw of Tashigi but nope she had to show up when they were in a hurry to leave, and if the stony expression on her face was anything to go on, she was pissed off.

 

‘Give me those swords!’ Zoro blinks at Tashigi’s demand ‘You heard me, swords like those should not be in the hands of pirate scum like you’

 

Zoro actually laughs ‘Like I told you before, I’m not going to give them up without a fight’ he reaches for his swords, but only manages to draw 2 of them before he had to block the bluenette’s strike. _‘Well it seems she is even better than I thought she was’_ Zoro thinks as he battles the sword otaku marine, reaching a stand still but unsure if he could beat her with only 2 swords. Taking a quick backstep he moves Wado to his mouth and draws Kitetsu, the tables turn quickly and he swiftly disarms Tashigi, yubishiri embedded in the wall inches from her neck ‘You were never getting these swords from me’ he says with a small sigh before sheathing them one by one and beginning to walk away

 

‘Why didn’t you kill me? It’s because I’m a girl isn’t … Ow!’ Tashigi groans as Zoro hits her with the flat of his sword

 

‘Idiot! Being a girl has nothing to do with it, if you were as bad as you think you are I wouldn’t have needed all 3 swords to do it

I’ve only lost to 2 people in my life, one was Mihawk, the other was Kuina, she was my best friend and the 2nd best swordsman I’ve ever met’

 

_With Luffy, Kaos and Sanji_ (having skirted around Zoro and Tashigi’s fight and continued running)

 

‘There it is, I can see the harbour’ Luffy cheers

 

‘It wasn’t right you know, letting Zoro fight a lady like that’ Sanji grumbles, only to get head smacked by the flat of Kaos’ khopesh

 

‘Nobody cares, besides she attacked him’

 

‘Still, you should never hurt a woman’

 

Kaos smirks very slightly ‘I’ll be sure to inform Alvida your balls are available for target practice Sesese’ he laughs, until he sees what’s right in front of them: Captain Smoker on a motorcycle _‘FUCK!’_

 

‘Straw Hat Luffy, Mirror Master Kaos, together in one place. Nice of you pirates to make my job easier for a change’ Smoker says gruffly as he gets off his bike.

 

‘Sanji, get moving, we’ll be right behind you’ Luffy states, his hat falling over his eyes while Kaos pulls out hebi with a smile. The cook looks ready to protest, but considering his captain’s stubbornness it would be easier to move the Red Line so did as he was told.

 

‘I highly doubt that’ Smoker growls, his arms already beginning to lose shape and become smoke

 

**White Out**

 

The marine captain’s smoke wrapped around Luffy’s body, the rubber captain flailing uselessly in the air. The only reason it didn’t catch the elder pirate was because it missed when he sped forward, trying either distract or damage the marine captain… only for the blade to pass harmlessly through his body

 

‘Shit!’

 

‘How’d he do that?’ Luffy asks

 

Smoker scoffs ‘I ate the **_Moku Moku no mi_** , allowing me to transform my body into smoke whenever I want. And you can’t hurt smoke’ he smiles around his cigars, tossing Luffy into a wall before launching a smoke fist into Kaos’ gut

 

**White Blow**

 

‘Had enough pirates?’ Smoker asks, both don’t reply, just pull themselves to their feet. Luffy rushing at him before firing off a **gum gum gattling,** which while capable of pushing Smoker back slightly didn’t seem to actually be hurting the man

 

‘That’s really gross’ Luffy grimaces, seeing his fist embedded in Smoker’s face, the marine looking only mildly annoyed by the intrusion, but he’s always looked like that so it probably had nothing to do with the fist in his face.

 

**White Blow**

 

The smoke slams into Luffy, then proceeds to pin him to the wall.

 

‘Hm _, so his devil fruit makes him untouchable… I wonder just how far that extends_ ’ the 1st mate wonders as he wills his hands to shift, his reflect armour forming as well as lengthening his nails to about 3 inches.

 

Kaos slices the smoke with his chrome coloured, clawed hand, a tuft of fur appearing for just a second before fading back into smoke. However it was enough for Smoker to release a hiss and recall his arms, freeing Luffy from his hold

 

[Given later examination, even though he did manage to draw blood it was basically a paper cut, so it was just shock that someone could cut him since eating his logia fruit that had Smoker let go, that and reflexive recoil, like when you stub your toe or burn yourself]

 

‘Okay, now we run!’ Luffy yells, pained and a little annoyed at how badly Smoker was kicking their asses

 

‘Oh no you don’t, you’re not entering the Grand Line as long as I have anything to say about it’ Smoker growls, reaching for the Jute on his back, but is stopped when someone grabs his arm

 

‘It seems you don’t have a say anymore’ the gravely voice says with slight amusement

 

Smoker’s eyes narrow ‘You!’ he snarls, looking back at the man, smirking under his cloak, diamond tattoos along the left side of his face ‘The government will soon have you head just like theirs’

 

Dragon smirks ‘I don’t think so’ he whispers then looks at the confused but retreating straw hats ‘So long boys’ was mumbled before nodding his head to his companion

 

An emerald green whirlwind tore through the island, among other things separating the pirates from the marines, destroying the marine’s cannons and blowing the straw hat crew in the direction of their ship, Kaos and Luffy gripping hard onto their hats to keep them on their head rather than ending up at the bottom of the sea. As quickly and as strangely as it began the wind stopped, the storm returning to it’s previous level.

 

As Smoker pulls himself to his feet (Dragon managing to sneak away in the chaos as usual) Tashigi runs up to him ‘Captain, the straw hats have gotten to their ship, it’s gone’ she grips her sword tensely, Smoker can see losing to Roranoa has shaken her, and angered her.

 

‘We’re going after them’ Smoker growls through his cigars, Tashigi surprised he was including her

 

‘Well it looks like I showed up just in time’ Smoker groans internally, remembering that alongside Straw Hat’s bounties was a memo that said with an 80 million beri crew in East Blue they would be sending another Captain to assist, he just wished they’d told him it was going to be Nylock Lucina, a woman who unfortunately prescribed to Sakazuki’s ‘ ** _Absolute Justice_** ’ world view, while he more closely followed Alkoji’s case by case determination, he would just never refer to his own world view as ‘ ** _Lazy Justice_** ’ though.

 

[Fun Fact: Lucina’s a Grand line/ New World born 32 year old, 10ft tall and an E-cup, because I said so really. Also because the further into the Grand Line you go the bigger everything is, at least given the way Oda draws the girls in the manga ;)]

 

Before Smoker can really formulate a response/greeting to his fellow captain, one of his men ran up to him to report ‘Captains, the Straw Hats got away and they appear to have taken Iron Mace Alvida with them’

 

‘So, that’s 3 Devil Fruit users on that crew’ Lucina sneers which surprises Tashigi; sure DF powers give the pirates an unfair advantage, but they had kerioseki and DF users of their own, usually the highest ranked members of a group, such as Captain Smoker himself in this branch as well as the current 3 admirals and the Fleet Commander (Hi seagull hat guy, knew I’d get to mention you eventually). Then again from what she’d heard the younger marine Nylock always had a scowl on her face, ironic given her little (in age and size) brother’s moniker, and Vice Admiral Nylock’s kind and approachable nature.

 

Smoker nods ‘Men, ready a ship, I’m heading into the Grand Line after those pirates’

 

On the Going Merry

 

‘Ow’ the boys groan, landing heavily when they hit the Merry’s deck

 

‘You’re alive!’ Nami says, sighing in relief

 

‘And all here, that’ll really piss off Smoker’ Alvida smirks

 

‘Hey, what’s she doing here?’ Usopp finally gets to ask,

 

‘She asked to join the crew, I said yes. Anyone got a problem with that?’ Luffy asks in response, Sanji clearly having no complaints if his heart eyes were any indication, while Alvida’s large mace had the coward zipping his lips, to the amusement of both her, Zoro and Kaos.

 

‘Guys I think we should do something to mark the occasion, after all you don’t enter the Grand Line everyday’ Sanji says once they were far enough from Loguetown the marine’s wouldn’t be bothering them for at least a while

 

‘Okay’

 

To being King of the Pirates! And finding the One Piece

To understanding the Devil Fruits

To be the world’s greatest swordsman

To draw a map of the world

To become a brave warrior of the sea

To be a great doctor

To find the All Blue

To be the most beautiful Heavy Hitter

 

As one, the straw hat crew raised their legs before slamming them down on the barrel, shattering it into splinters

 

‘Here we go, everyone. Onward to the Grand Line!’ Luffy shouts from the lambs head of the Going Merry, the others smiling, feeding on his enthusiasm

 

ADVENTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

LW: Well that’s the end of the East Blue Saga, Grand Line soon, but first I have a very special chapter next :D

 

1st Logia (well 1st 2 :D) and as expected Luffy and Kaos get their asses kicked. Dragon gets to be awesome, and a new captain shows up to cause problems for the pirates in the future.

 

_ Techniques / abilities _

 

Alvida – Eater of the Suba Suba no mi/ Smooth Smooth fruit

 

Smoker – Eater of the Moku Moku no mi / Smoke Smoke fruit

 

**White Out** : Smoker produces a thick smoke which he uses to ensnare his opponent(s).

**White Blow** : He shoots the smoke at his enemy, slamming directly into them. It can easily transition into **_White Out_** , but didn’t in this case at least.

 

Buggy

 

**Bara Bara Cart** : I have literally no idea how to explain this shit. Somehow he becomes a cart and uses a bomb as an engine/propulsion system.

Seriously at least what Alvida did in the anime is understandable, super smooth skin means she can basically jet ski along any smooth surface.

 

** Straw Hat Bounty: **

 

Monkey D. Luffy – 38,000,000 beri / €286,520

Serpens D. Kaos – 42,000,000 beri / €316,680

Alvida – 5,000,000 beri / €38,200

 

Current total bounty – 85,000,000 beri / € 649,400


	21. Flashback Land: Origin of the Straw Hat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A trip to Flashback Land, where we get the start of Luffy and Kaos' origin story

LW: Okay so here it is, a flashback chapter O_O! Yeah it’s taken me 21 chapters what took the anime 4 episodes, but we finally get Luffy (and Kaos) origin story… or at least the 1st part.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Origin of the Straw Hat

 

_ Dawn _ _ Island _ _ – Fushio village (Makino’s Bar) _

 

‘You gotta take me with you on your next adventure Shanks’ the boy pleads, while the red head in a straw hat laughs

 

‘Yeah right, like you could be a pirate’

 

‘See kid, you may be a great swimmer and all, but it take a lot more than that to be a pirate’ Yassop argues

 

‘But I’m a great fighter too. My punches are as strong as pistol shots’ an 8 year old Luffy boasts as he sits by the bar, the man beside him chuckles lightly, pushing his old straw hat out of his eyes

 

‘Really, a pistol you say? That’s impressive. Here have a drink on me’

 

‘Yay!’ Luffy cheers, gulping down the juice as the pirates start laughing

 

‘Ha ha, only a kid drinks juice’ the red head wheezes between laughs

 

‘Shut up asshole!’ Luffy screams back angrily

 

‘Relax Monkey, just finish your juice’ and amused voice purrs and Shank’s attention is drawn to the other kid in the bar: pale and bony, if it weren’t his notably prepubescent voice and confirmation from Makino he’d think the kid was at least 13 rather than the 10 that was the purplette’s actual age. He was Kaos, Luffy’s big brother, or good as given they’d been raised together as such, since Garp practically dropped them on Makino’s doorstep as a baby and toddler respectively many years back.

 

Suddenly the door was broken off it’s hinges, a scruffy looking gang of men enter the building

 

‘We’re mountain bandits, but we’re not here to wreck the place, provided you give us all the booze you’ve got’ their leader orders

 

‘I’m sorry but we’re fresh out’ Makino answers, partly apologetic, and partly worried

 

‘Then what are all these guys drinking? Juice?’ Higuma yells, pointing at the clearly intoxicated pirates all around him

 

‘Well he is’ Kaos mutters, waving his hand in Luffy’s direction and getting punched in the ribs because of it, though not for self-preservation reasons, he just didn’t want people to know he was drinking juice

 

‘No, but they did drain me dry’

 

Shanks nods before reaching behind him ‘Sorry about that, but here’s an unopened bottle. I hope this helps’

 

Higuma sneers and smashes the bottle with his cutlass

 

‘One bottle ain’t going to do, I’m a wanted man with 8 million beri for my head’

 

[HAHAHAHAHA! That’s cute, need I remind you that in the last month Luffy’s bounty jumped up to 1.5 BILLLION! And this guy thinks 8 mill makes him some kind of badass… okay in the East Blue where the average is 3 I’ll admit its okay, but it’s nothing special]

 

Shanks clearly as the same thoughts as the brackets above as he didn’t even react to the bandit’s threat ‘Oh no. Now the floor’s all wet’ he whines, the reaches down for what remains of the bottle ‘Sorry about the mess Makino, you got a rag back there I can borrow?’

 

‘It’s fine Shanks I’ll clean it up’

 

**_Smash_ **

 

Higuma clearly didn’t like being ignored as he proceeded to destroy the entire counter, knocking its contents all over the floor

 

‘Seeing as you like to clean so much, might as well give you a worthwhile job’ he then sighs and turns to go ‘Move it men, if there’s no sake there’s no point in sticking around this backwater little town’ he grunts as he walks out the door.

 

Once all the bandits had left the pirate’s erupt into laughter, even the currently soaked Shanks

 

‘He’s got you good captain’ Yassop laughs, Lucky Roo nodding around his mutton

 

‘What the Hell was that?’ Luffy yells angrily ‘You should have fought back, what kind of pirates are you?’

 

Shanks laughs ‘Luffy, sometimes it’s just not worth fighting against some guy being a dick over booze, it’s pointless’

 

Luffy growls and sits with a huff, his eyes flicked over to a swirly blue fruit in a medium sized chest, along side a smaller silver and swirly fruit ‘ _Hmm?_ ’

 

‘Hey Luffy, it you stress eat like that you’ll become even more of an anchor’ Shanks jokes until he sees the swirls on the food he’s eating ‘ _Oh no please not that_ ’ he thinks before running over ‘What are you eating?’ Luffy gulps, his face pale _‘Fuuuuuuuuuuuck!’_

 

‘Um…’

 

‘Cough it up Luffy, cough it up now!’ Shanks orders as he shakes the kid upside down… right until his neck stretches and his face hits the floor

 

‘Ahh!’

 

‘Luffy do you have any idea what you’ve done?’

 

‘Nope’

 

‘You’ve eaten one of the Devil Fruits, so now you can’t ever swim again’

 

‘And if you eat another you’ll explode!’

 

‘Not helping Yassop’ Ben grunts at the sniper

 

‘Can’t Swim? Explode?!’ Luffy yells in panic

 

‘Yes, you ate the Gomu Gomu no mi, so your entire body now has the properties of rubber, you’re a rubber boy now kid’

 

‘Really?’ Luffy sits there for a moment before he sticks his fingers in the corners of his mouth and pulls them back into a wide grin. He then releases his hold, his face snapping back to it’s normal shape ‘Awesome!’ he cheers

 

_ Later, back home _

 

Luffy gasps ‘Is that?’

 

‘Yes, it’s another of Captain Shanks’ Devil Fruits’ Kaos says with a wide grin

 

‘Are you sure about this Kaos? Weird powers in exchange for never being able to swim’ he asks

 

‘Well I never could swim very well in the first place, might as well have an excuse’ Kaos answers with a shrug and a childish grin

 

‘Okay then’ Luffy smirks back before frowning ‘You do know these things taste awful right?’

 

Kaos grimaces ‘And it’s not exactly a good idea to eat a lime straight in the first place’

 

‘This is going to suck to be you, shishishi’

 

Fushou Village the next day

 

‘Mayor! The mountain bandits have Luffy!’ Makino yells as she runs into Woodslap’s office, the man gulps and follows her quickly to where Higuma was kicking the crap out of the small boy, reaching them just as Kaos got tossed back by one of the bandits.

 

‘You shouldn’t have opened your mouth kid, nobody who’s pissed me off has lived to tell the tale’ Higuma growls, drawing his sword

 

‘Please stop, don’t kill the boy. I don’t know what he’s done and I don’t plan to fight you over it, but I’ll do anything so long as you spare the poor, foolish boy’s life’ Woodslap pleads, falling to his knees as he does so

 

Higuma smirks ‘At least some people understand the way of the world, but I must decline, this brat’s already made he angry, so he’s got to go’

 

‘You bastards!’ Luffy yells from under the bandit’s boot

 

‘No’

 

‘Stop! Please’

 

‘So this is where everyone is’ Makino jumps as Shanks and his crew appear behind her ‘Hey Luffy, I thought you said your punches were strong as pistols’ he chuckles

 

‘Not now Shanks’ Luffy chokes

 

‘You should go, before something bad happens to you. But incase you’re just slow as well as weak I have just the man to deliver the message’ Shanks doesn’t even flinch when a pistol is pressed to his temple, in fact he smirks just a little

 

‘Now you’ve drawn your pistol are you willing to use it?’ he asks calmly

 

‘What?’

 

‘Guns aren’t for making threats they’re for action. You draw one…’

 

**BANG** **_splat_** _Gulp_

 

‘…someone is going down’ Shanks finishes as the bandit dies due to Lucky Roo shooting him in the face

 

‘You bastard, you’re dead!’

‘These guys fight dirty’

 

‘Dirty?’

‘We never claimed to be saints or anything, we’re pirates’ Ben adds

 

‘Shut up, we just want the kid, so stay out of it’ one of the bandit’s yell, but is ignored by the pirates

 

‘Listen very closely here. You can pour booze on me, drop food on me, even spit on me and I’ll probably just laugh it off. But you harm a friend of mine, you’ll pay for it regardless of your reason, and I will make sure you do’ Shanks’ eyes were cold and serious, sending chills down everyone’s spines

 

Higuma laughs ‘You’re going to make us pay? Well men, kill these pansies’

 

Ben sighs and steps forward ‘I’ll handle this boss, shouldn’t take to long’ he then proceeds to beat the bandits with his rifle, not even bothering to shot them, just using the weapon like an improvised club.

 

‘Damn it all, kill the brats so we can leave’ Higuma yells, one of his men rushing at Kaos with his sword, the kid tenses, before his arms loses all it’s colour and gains a reflective, silver sheen to it

 

_‘Damn brats, looks like they both decided to steal Devil Fruits from me’_ Shanks internally grumbles

 

**_Gurk_ **

 

Everyone stood there in shock, Kaos most of all as his chrome coloured limb cleaves through the blade and imbeds itself in the bandit’s chest, impaling his heart on his long fingers

 

‘What kind of freak are you?’ Higuma gasps

 

‘What’s going on? I can’t see’

 

Luffy’s outburst caused the pirates to kick back into gear, Ben continuing beat down of the lower tier bandits, while Kaos yanks his arm back out of the cooling body, skittering back until he collides with Shanks chest, the captain holding the kid steady before he could fall

 

‘Hold on, you’ll be fine’ he whispers as his first mate finishs off the canon fodder

 

‘That’s it! To Hell with all you pirate bastards!’ Higume yells angrilly before dropping a smoke bomb, managing to escape before Ben or Shanks could get to him.

 

‘Damn it, he got away’ _beat_ ‘Oh shit! He’s still got Luffy!’ Shanks yells loudly

 

_ Transition _

 

‘Ha, they’d never expect a mountain bandit to escape by boat’ Higuma laughs as he thinks about how smart he is, while dangling Luffy over the side of his boat

 

‘Damn it, let go of me you dickhead!’ Luffy screams angrily, flailing around in an attempt to get free

 

‘If you insist. Say hi to the fishes for me’ the bandit chuckles before tossing Luffy overboard, laughing as he makes a loud splash and begins splashing around aimlessly. This laughter ended quite abruptly when something erupts from the water right behind him: a sea king, it’s body a greyish brown and it’s eyes blood red. Higuma had little more time than to express his confusion before the great beast had eaten both him and his boat.

 

**_‘I’m going to die’_** Luffy’s panicked mind screams as the Sea King barrels toward him, the boy colliding with something solid as their jaws barely miss him. Looking up Luffy’s eye widen ‘Shanks!’ he yells then screams when he sees Lord of the Coast double back

 

Rather than show fear Shanks’ face was cold and stony ‘Pick on someone your own size. Get Lost!’ he orders, the 2 stare for a moment before the massive beast whimpers and swims away ‘there we go Luffy, safe and sound’ he says with his usual cheerful demeanour

 

Luffy sniffles ‘B-b-but Shanks, your arm’ he cries into his chest, most of the pirate’s left arm having been bitten off by the sea king

 

‘It’s just an arm Luffy, nothing I wouldn’t give to save a friend’ he pulls the lad closer with his remaining arm and begins to kick towards land, his crew and Kaos there to meet him

 

‘Captain, quickly, you need to get to Doc Mills’ Yassop yells worryingly to which Shanks nods

 

‘Sure thing, Luffy stick with the men, me and your brother need to see the Doc’

 

Luffy gasps, looking to the taller boy ‘Kaos got hurt?’

 

Shanks smiles, ruffling his hair ‘Nothing major but best get him checked out anyway’ Luffy nods sadly as Shanks pushes the mostly unresponsive DF user in front of him

 

_ The Red Force _

 

‘Shit, this is going to take a bit of work Shanks’ Zelena sighs, hands running through her thick, red hair.

 

‘Don’t worry Z, I’ll live and you’ll patch me up just fine, same as you have everyone else’ the captain grins then turns to Kaos ‘So want to talk kid?’

 

‘I killed him’ the purplette meeps ‘I killed someone, I’m a monster’ he sniffles

 

Shanks frowns but lightly squeezes the kid’s arm ‘You’re not a monster, even if you are a killer’

 

**BANG**

 

‘That’s not helping!’ Z|elena yells with shark teeth

 

The Yonko whines as he rubs his head ‘That wasn’t nice Z’ he pouts before turning back to Kaos ‘You know you weren’t the only one to kill today’

 

‘I wasn’t?’

 

‘Nope. You know Lucky Roo?’

 

Kaos nods ‘Yeah, he’s the one who gets all the best meat, Luffy doesn’t like that about him’

 

‘Yeah well he also killed a bandit, shot him in the face. Is he a monster?’

 

‘No’ Kaos answers ‘but he’s an adult. Despite Luffy trying to be all grown up, I know we’re still kids’

 

Shanks nods in understanding ‘Very true and I’m sorry you had to do so, so early in life. But he attacked you and you were trying to save your brother from the bandits. That’s self defence in my book’

 

‘Really?’

 

‘Of course, in fact…’ he meets eyes with Zelena who sighs and nods before walking over to the wall with a grumble and pulling out a small box from a hidden compartment

 

‘You better know what you’re doing’ she hisses in his ear before placing it between them

 

‘Well? Open it’ he says to Kaos who looks at him in confusion before he nods and opens the box, revealing a gold coloured khopesh with a black/purple serpent coiled around the hilt, itself appearing to be wrapped in snakeskin ‘This is the Hebi no Oni no mi’ he explains ‘And I think you’ll find a good use for it’

 

‘You’re giving me a sword?’ the boy looks confused as he picks up the weapon. Once he does the snake animates, sliding under his sleeves and up his arm. Kaos hisses and clutches his shoulder in pain, swaying a few times before steadying himself ‘Whoa!’ he gasps

 

‘Yeah. This blade belonged to a man I greatly respected’ Shanks began, Kaos noticing tears in Zelena’s eyes, the red head missing her former captain ‘the fact it accepted you means you will carry on his legacy. I will admit he was probably 20 kinds of crazy but he had a good heart and treated his crew like family. I see great things for you and Luffy in the future, now get out there before Anchor has a complete meltdown’ he teases, ruffling his hair before the lanky kid runs out of the infirmary

 

Once he was out of earshot Zelena hits the straw hat wearing idiot (A ginger smacking a straw hat wearing idiot… sounds familiar) ‘Ow’ Shanks whines

 

‘Do you have any idea what could have happened? The only consolation would have been that it was a quick death’

 

‘Relax, I knew what I was doing’

 

‘No, you didn’t, you took a chance like with this’ she gestures to the stump she was still treating ‘I don’t care if you gamble with your own body or even your own life, but those kids… I know you’re not that kind of man, or at least I hope you aren’t now’

 

Shanks sighs ‘I know Z and I’m sorry, but it just felt right, like him and that blade slot together like a single unit’

 

‘I know, it’s the only reason I gave you it in the first place, rather than send you flying across the room’ there was an awkward silence for a few minutes

 

‘I can’t thank you enough for taking this position’

 

‘Nonsense, you needed a Doctor and it’s clearly needed given you did this like an idiot’

 

‘No, I mean it, you have a chance away from this life, and because of me you could be dragged back into it’ he explains, wincing when she tightens the bandage.

 

‘Idiot. You are a friend Shanks, I’ve never had a problem helping my friends’ she smiles before slapping the back of his head once more ‘Besides, it’s just till you find yourself a new doctor, and I already have some other work lined up with Grima and Henry’

 

_ 1 week later _

 

‘Do you have to go?’ Luffy asks sadly as Shanks crew loading up their ship

 

‘Yeah we do, we’ve been on this island and East Blue in general for too long, we need to go. You still want to come with?’ he asks with a smirk

 

‘No thanks, I’m going to make my own crew one day’

 

‘That’s great because we wouldn’t have taken an anchor like you around anyway’ Red Hair Shanks laughs and Luffy yells

 

‘That’s not nice you jerk! I’m going to be the Captain of the greatest pirate crew the world has EVER SEEN! And we’ll find the greatest treasure there is and I’ll become King of the Pirates’

 

Shank’s laughter fades to a warm smile ‘The greatest huh?’ he chuckles, reaching for his hat before placing it on Luffy’s rubber noggin ‘Here’s an idea, you keep this hat and bring it back when you have this amazing crew of fearsome pirates okay?’ he hears Luffy sniffle though can’t see the tears behind the hat ‘Hey Kaos’ the taller kid stops helping Ben fill a crate to nod ‘I know wherever Anchor goes you will be, I won’t ask you to stop him from making stupid decisions, we both know that’s impossible, but try keep him from getting killed’

 

‘Hey! I don’t need his help I’m going to be a great pirate’ Luffy complains

 

‘That may be true Luffy but every pirate Captain needs a 1st mate, and who better than your own brother?’

 

Luffy pouts for a moment before nodding ‘Hey Kaos, want to join my crew?’

 

The purplette nods with a grin ‘Sure, I expect a pay rise though’

 

‘Okay’

 

Shanks smiles as he watches the brothers from the ship’s deck, knowing they were going to take the world by storm…

 

TOGETHER

 

TBC

 

LW: Well there we go, the origin of both of their Devil Fruits, Luffy’s hat and even Kaos’ sword. I hope you all enjoyed this little stroll through Flashback Land, back to regular time in 2 weeks.

 

We’re finished with the East Blue now, next chapter we hit the Grand Line! 


	22. Island Whales and Water running up hill?

LW: Well here we go, onward to the next Saga, East Blue officially ended back in May, now June brings us into the Grand Line and the beginning of what is technically considered part of the Alabasta Saga.

Also in this universe the Warship Island Arc happened and I’ll probably get back to it some day, but nothing really important happened to feel free to imagine whatever you like.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Island Whales and water running up hill? The Grand Line’s weird already.

 

_ Going Merry – East Blue _

 

‘Okay everyone, we’re almost hit the point of no return. Now the only way to enter the Grand Line is Reverse Mountain’

 

‘Why can’t we just go this way?’ Kaya asks, running her fingers straight down the map.

 

‘That’s the Calm Belt’ Nami begins

 

‘A place without wind or current, infested with Sea Kings’ Kaos finishes causing Kaya to droop

 

‘Oh, sorry I wasted your time’ she mumbles, flinching when she feels a hand on her shoulder

 

‘Hey, don’t worry about it, that was a good question, after all it does look like an easier option on paper’

 

‘Speaking of paper how does the map say we enter?’ Alvida asks, her chin resting on her knuckles

 

‘Well 99% of the Red Line is solid, impenetrable wall of rock, but there’s a single canal connecting each of the Blues together and then to the Grand Line. The problem is it looks like we have to somehow go up the mountain and then down the other side’ Nami explains

 

‘Sailing up a mountain? Now you’ve lost it Nami’ Zoro scoffs while Luffy just grins

 

_‘This is going to be so cool’_ he thinks

 

‘Hey guys, we have a problem!’ Usopp yells, the other only then noticing him struggling to move their rudder bar. Nami groans but directs Sanji to deal with it, which he happily attempts to do

 

_ A little later _

 

‘Hey guys, I can see the mystery mountain!’ Luffy yells, the others a little busy with their brains trying to get out of their **HOLY SHIT** holding pattern

 

_‘Damn it! Nami was right, the water is flowing uphill’_ Zoro thinks

 

‘What the Hell? I can’t see the top, the mountain’s taller than the clouds!’ Usopp yells

 

‘Okay, we can see the entrance, just need to actually keep our heading in that direction’ Kaos turns to Luffy who shrugs, then Nami who nods, before the reflect human sends Sanji and Usopp to work on their steering. Not that it did much good...

 

‘Shit, the current’s got us, if we don’t adjust soon we’re going to break against the Red Line’ Nami yells, Usopp and Sanji frantically trying on the steering pole, while Kaos, Zoro and Alvida try use the sails to edge just a little bit to the right. Things were looking up… right until the rudder’s steering pole snapper off

 

_‘FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!’_

 

Seeing no other option Luffy jumps off the front of the Merry just before it reaches the gates, though as usual he forgot to tell anyone his plan

 

**Gum Gum Balloon**

 

Luffy inflates just before the ship hits the wall, nudging it to safety. Kaos, with a quick toss of Hebi hooking onto Luffy so he could once more rejoin them on the assent

 

‘WE MADE IT!’ was cheered by most of the straw hats, Luffy even joining in once he’d regained his bearings

 

With the crisis averted even Nami was looking happy, cheering with the others and laughing. All was right with the world

 

‘Forget about me so soon pirates?’ the group turn to see a weirdo with swirly pale purple hair and really long nails on the railing of the ship

 

‘Hey isn’t that the sicko guy?’ Luffy asks

 

‘I think it is’ Alvida notes ‘But then again I also thought he was dead’

 

‘I hate the lot of you, not only did you ruin all my plans but now they’re out of reach from ever coming to fruition. For that alone I will take great pleasure in destroying you bastards myself’

 

‘Anyone got a plan?’ Kaos asks quietly

 

‘Whatever we do it’ll have to be quick, with his wind blades he could tear the ship apart quite easily’ Zoro answers, his hands already wrapping around Wado and Kitetsu’s hilts

 

‘Ha ha, you fools can’t lay a finger on me, I hold all the cards this time’

 

**Bang Bang**

 

‘Fu…’ Eric doesn’t even get to finish his curse as the double kneecapping made him lose his balance and fall backward, into the turbulent waters of Reverse Mountain. The Zoro and Sanji look down at the blond huddled between them, her revolvers still smoking. Then look at one another, then down to Kaya before smirking

 

‘You did good Doc’

 

With that dealt with the majesty of the sights of Reverse Mountain, once more held their attention till they reached the peak at which point the mostly gentle assent quickly shifted to a drop worthy of extreme roller coasters, a sentiment clearly shared by the ship’s captain as he yelled and cheered in joy, one hand holding down his hat and the other gripping the front of the boat, actions matched by Kaos and Alvida (being the only ones on the crew with hats) while the others held the ship in a death grip.

 

‘This is so cool!’ Luffy cheers with a wide D grin

 

‘Anyone else hear a loud groan/rumble?’ Kaos asks

 

‘How can you hear anything over the wind?’ Nami screams, forcing her eyes open to ensure they don’t go smash against the sides

 

‘What?’ Kaya yells, seeing their lips more but unsure they were saying

 

‘We’re passing through the cloud layer’ Nami says as loud as she could before screaming when the source of the rumble/groan…an enormous whale ramming the Red Line

 

‘Holy shit, that’s a huge whale’

‘It’s going to crush us!’

‘We’re all gonna die!’

 

_‘Not if I have anything to say about it’_ Luffy thinks

 

‘Wait a minute, if this thing is a mountain to us, we might as well be a speak’

 

Nami blinks at Sanji saying something helpful ‘You’re right, we might be able to pass by completely under it’s radar’

 

‘Only problem is we’re still on a bloody collision course!’ Kaos reminds her

 

‘Then we need to turn the ship, somehow’ Alvida argues

 

‘The rudder’s broken’

 

‘Well who’s fault is that?’

 

‘QUIET!!’ Everyone turns to Kaya in shock ‘We need to try something, anything or we’re going to die’

 

‘Got it!’ Luffy nods and runs off, to the confusion of everyone else

 

Kaos sighs before looking back to the whale ‘There’s more room on its right, hard port. Try turning the ship left’ he orders, the guys all frantically trying to move their broken rudder into a position where they can do anything… and failing

 

‘This is it, we were in the GrandLine for less than a minute and we’re about to die’ Nami whimpers, as the whale gets even closer

 

**BOOM!**

 

Jaws drop as the Merry’s cannon is unloaded into the whale, it also managing to reduce the ship’s speed so it gently nudged the beast rather than ran into it… still broke the lamb’s head off though.

 

_‘We’re dead’_ Nami thinks as she collapses, this close to passing out

 

‘Well, we’re boned’ Kaos grumbles, sounding almost resigned to his fate.

 

_DERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP_

 

‘Hey, what happened to the Merry Head?’ Luffy yells as he comes back on deck looking pissed off

 

‘Now is not the time, let’s book it!’ the rest of the crew agreed as they broke out the oars and began to row their way around the whale, who didn’t seem to even react to the cannon fire that had been launched at it. Everything was fine until they reached its eye…

 

‘You think you can break my special seat and get away with it!’

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

‘Luffy! You moron!’ everyone screams as he punches the whale straight in the eye. This the monstrous beast did react to, his gaze flicking down onto them faster than could be expected for something of its considerable size. Luffy didn’t seem fazed at all that he was picking a fight with something who’s eye was bigger than his ship, he was just mad.

 

The whale groans loudly, its massive jaws open wide, practically creating a whirlpool all its own, as the boat was taken into its maw. The buffeting unfortunately knocks Luffy off of the deck, but luckily he was able to grab a tooth before he could hit the water and drown. Determined and angry he began to climb the whale’s outside while the ship was sucked further inside

 

_DERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP_

 

The whale’s jaws close splitting up Luffy from the others. The rubber boy didn’t take it well when he finally reached the top.

 

‘You stupid whale, give me my friends back’ Luffy growls, angrily stomping on his head. There was little reaction on the whale’s part, other than beginning to dive again _‘Shit, shit, shit, shit. How am I getting out of this?’_ Luffy thinks, only then noticing a hatch in the whale ‘That’ll work’

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

‘Oww, fuck’ Kaos groans as he sits up, glad to see they hadn’t lost anymore (besides Luffy) in the mess that had just occurred

 

‘How’d we get outside? We were just swallowed by a whale, that wasn’t a dream right?’ Nami asks and the crew finally do look around and see she was right: they did appear to be outside and wherever they were it was just the Merry and a tiny island. Well until a huge squid rose from the water and tried to attack the ship

 

‘Ahh sea monster!’ Usopp screams, him and Kaya huddling together as Sanji stands up while Zoro, Kaos and Alvida ready their weapons. This was pointless as the creature was harpooned before it could damage the vessel. It was then slowly winched towards the house on the island.

 

‘Well, guess we should find out who’s home’ Sanji suggests

 

‘A ship’ was mumbled as a figure stands in the doorway of the house, staring at them. Stepping into the light they see it to be an old man with strange hair that looked like flower petals around the back of his head

 

_‘Great, more weirdoes’_

 

The man gazes unblinkingly, with an intense glare as he moves across his little island, eyes locked with the chef,… until he sits in a deck chair and stares out at them before opening up the paper.

 

‘That’s it?’ Sanji yells angrily, Kaos and Zoro chuckling in amusement

 

‘You better tell us what’s going on. Stop messing around we’ve got cannons!’ Usopp yells from the cabin, even Kaya sweat drops at this

 

More silent staring is held between the pirates and OAP

 

‘You try that and someone is going to die’ he croaks

 

‘Yeah and who’s that?’ Zoro asks, getting ready to fight

 

‘Me of course’ the old man answers, Kaos and Alvida can’t help but laugh before remembering to grab Sanji so he doesn’t attack him

 

‘So, who are you and where are we?’ the 1st mate asks, mostly before their cook tries to kill him

 

The man stares silently, once more causing the pirates to sweatdrop ‘It’s rude to ask someone their name without giving yours first’ he finally says

 

Kaos sighs, placing his hand over his chest ‘Serpens Kaos of the Straw Hat Pirates’ he answers

 

‘Names Crocus, I’m the lighthouse keeper of the Twin Capes, and where we are quite simply is inside Laboon’

 

‘Laboon?’ Zoro asks, before hearing Nami groan loudly

 

‘We’re inside that fucking whale aren’t we?’ she asks with a defeated tone

 

‘Not just any whale, Laboon is a West Blue Island Whale. He’s also over 50 years old and has spent most of it slamming his head into the Red Line. Now I presume you want to leave, it’s quite simple, just go through those doors over there’ he waves his hand in the direction behind them, they turn and see there really was a giant set of doors just behind them

 

‘That was surprisingly easy’ Kaya notes, Alvida and Nami nodding in agreement, Kaos actually disappointed by the simplicity… until they were caught in a typhoon

 

‘You just had to think it didn’t you?’ Sanji complains to the purplette who was grinning once again ‘You can’t go one minute without stimulation can you?’

 

‘Nope!’

 

‘What the hell is going on?’ Nami screams

 

‘Remember what I said, about him slamming his head into the Red Line? Well this is what it looks like from the inside’ Crocus answers, moving to his main ship

 

‘Okay how are we going to get out of here if we can’t move in these waves?’ Usopp asks

 

‘We paddle, now stop complaining and get rowing’ Kaos orders, not noticing a splash with everything else going on

 

‘Hey guys, the old guy just jumped in’

 

‘What? But he’ll be eaten alive’ Kaya yelps, looking as worried as their navigator, though the red head was more worried that it would soon be their fate as well

 

‘Hey guys, Crocus just resurfaced’ Alvida says, clinging to the side of this ship a momentary reprieve from the maelstrom they’d been caught in

 

‘Not important right now, we need to get those doors open and get out of this whale before it digests us’ Nami replies, trying to figure out how to convince Zoro or Sanji to jump overboard and try open the doors for them. Then the yelling sounds

 

_‘Ah crap’_

 

The blast doors high above fly open, spitting out Luffy, a girl with light blue hair and a ginger with a crown, all falling into the liquid below

 

‘Luffy!’ the straw hats yell, Kaos lightly shoving Sanji off the ship so he could rescue their DF user captain before he drowns

 

Laboon groans a little more before all goes strangely calm

 

Nami hums ‘Don’t know what the old guy did but I guess it worked, Laboon’s calmed down, or at least his insides have

 

‘True. Now, we saved your asses, so explaining what you’re doing here would be nice’ Kaos growls as he stands over the 2 weirdoes that entered Laboon’s belly with Luffy

 

‘Mr. 9, these people are pirates’ the bluenette whispers to her companion, trying to squirm away from a lovesick Sanji

 

‘I can see that Miss Wednesday’ 9 agrees ‘But if we appeal to their humanity and compassion they may let us go, or at least listen to our dilemma’

 

‘Are any of those things edible?’ Luffy asks, frowning when Kaos shakes his head ‘Damn it’

 

‘I don’t think they have humanity to appeal to’ Wednesday grumbles

 

‘You dumbasses are still here?’ everyone turns to see Crocus had returned, and sounded annoyed ‘I don’t like to repeat myself but I’ll do it now because you clearly didn’t listen the first time. As long as I draw breath, you will not lay a hand on Laboon!’ he declares flatly, leaving no room for debate.

 

‘Sorry old man but we need this whale meat to save our village’ the bluenette says before firing her cannon, but surprisingly for a man of his age Crocus is able to leap into the path of the projectile, the explosion going off long before it could be even an irritant to Laboon

 

‘Damn, the old fart’s stronger than I expected’ the guy says

‘Relax 9, we’ll just fire again’

 

**BANG**

 

The 2 groan and hit the ground with a thump after Kaos slams their heads together, Nami pulling out some ropes to secure them.

 

_ Later _

 

‘Laboon has been waiting for 50 long years now for the return of his friends, let me explain’

 

And so Crocus did just that, telling the straw hats about how a band of pirates passed through Reverse Mountain many years ago, followed by a baby island whale that they had tried to leave behind for his safety, but he saw them as his family and came anyway. How due to damage to their ship they had to stay near the lighthouse for a few months while they worked on fixing it, during which the captain managed to get Laboon to stay with Crocus, here at the twin capes as well as the promise they made to return in 3 years, which they clearly didn’t. It was when he got to the fact the crew abandoned Laboon certain crewmates got annoyed

 

‘How do you know?’

 

‘Hm?’ Crocus looked confused

 

‘How do you know they abandoned Laboon? You don’t exactly get out much and word doesn’t exactly travel’ Kaos asks ‘If you can’t prove it you’re just being a dick to Laboon, making his pain and anger worse than it already is’

 

‘But it’s true, those pirates turned tail and ran, abandoning Laboon when they sailed into the Calm Belt…’

 

‘Which means they’re dead, but that doesn’t mean they never planned to come back to Laboon, after all, they had to get back to Reverse Mountain and the cape somehow’ Luffy adds his 2 cents, causing Crocus to sigh

 

‘Believe what you want, the point is that since the day I told Laboon all this, he has continued to slam his head into the Red Line, seeing it as the barrier between himself and his family. It’s never going to break, but that hasn’t stopped him from trying, nothing I’ve done has managed to either for that matter’

 

Everyone was silent for a moment… until Luffy and Kaos hop off the boat and stand in front of a much calmer Laboon

 

‘Hey Whale Guy’ Luffy yells, punching Laboon in the eye again. The Island Whale groans and turns his focus on the brothers. Despite himself the elder smirks to the younger, letting his body shift up to his elbows and ankles.

 

‘How about we make this fun?’ he asks

 

‘You’re on’ Luffy replies

 

**Gum Gum Spring**

**Shimmer**

 

The 2 launch themselves at Laboon, bouncing around as they land blows on the huge animal, mostly being able to dodge but some attacks were unavoidable, sending them both flying, Luffy’s rubber body providing some protection while Kaos had to make do with his reflect armour in combination with Hebi to stop his bounces.

 

‘They’re insane’ Wednesday mutters in shock, 9 nodding dumbly

 

‘You’re idiots. They’re real men and real pirates’ Crocus says standing a little behind them

 

‘Relax Miss Wednesday, don’t listen to the old fart’ Mr. 9 pleads as he tries hold her back

 

_Honk_

 

9 freezes as Wednesday slowly turns her head, quickly putting distance between them as he removes his hand from her breast as if burnt. Before she could rip his head off there is a louder bang which distracts her

 

‘There, it’s a draw.’ Luffy states, Laboon stopping and staring at them, while the boys stand and dust themselves off

 

‘Your old crew, they used to spar with you too didn’t they? Must have been a more even match back then’ Kaos jokes, smiling widely

 

‘You missed it, the playful fighting, and the drive to get stronger. All you’ve had is the Red Line, especially because Crocus might be getting a little old to be fighting giant whales’

 

‘Our group are also sailing the Grand Line, trying to fulfil our dreams. We’ll be back when we’re finished our journey, think you can wait that long?’

 

Laboon looked at the strange humans, so very much like his old friends and crew, the boy in the straw hat was just like the captain; full of life and stronger than anything he’d seen in years, while the tall one was a lot like Comic, just missing the musician’s signature afro. His heart still yearned for his old crew, but something about the young pirates reminded him of them enough it didn’t hurt as much, plus they could fight just like his old nakama, even though he was much larger than back then

 

Laboon bellows, with teary eyes, signalling his agreement and Luffy grins ‘Awesome, just hold on a minute’

 

‘There we go, finished’ Luffy smiles proudly at the quite terribly drawn Straw Hat Pirate Roger on Laboon’s forehead ‘ This is our promise to come back and spar again when we reach the end of the Grand Line. It’s a bit for a rush job so it’s a little delicate. Now don’t go ramming the Red Line again, or it’ll come off, you here me?’ he explains, the island whale nodding before groaning in joy

 

_ A little while later _

 

Kaos watches Nami flail as she works on the map, Sanji makes food and holds off a hungry Luffy. His wide grin would unnerve most but the others were getting used to his eccentricities, only Alvida and Usopp gave him worried looks.

 

‘Damn it!’ Nami yells, slamming her fist into the map

 

‘What’s wrong Nami-Swan?’ Sanji asks, worried at the source of his sweetie’s frustration

 

‘There’s something wrong with the compass’ she answers, pointing to the spinning item ‘I can’t get a heading with this’

 

Crocus laughs ‘You won’t be able to navigate the Grand Line with a simple compass, the combined magnetic fields given off by the islands make traditional navigation less than useless’

 

Something breaks inside Nami at that information ‘Useless?’ She repeats meekly

 

‘Exactly, without a Log Pose you could be going in circles till you die and not even notice’ the old doctor nods

 

‘Hey old guy, is this one?’ Luffy asks, holding up something that vaguely resembles a compass needle held within a glass dome

 

‘Yeah, that’s a Log Pose’

 

‘Luffy, where’d you get that?’ Nami asks as he passes it to his navigator

 

‘It fell off those weirdoes, thought it might be useful’ the rubber boy answers with a shrug while Nami starts to examine the log pose, but not before hitting him ‘Ow, what was that for? I thought I did good’

 

‘You did, but you were due a smack for all the shit you pulled with Laboon’ Nami explains then gets to work

 

As is common with these guys, she had just about managed to figure out how the Pose worked when Sanji noticed Luffy had eaten all the food, in response he kicked the rubber idiot from one side of the outlet to the other, passing right over Nami’s head as he went. Unfortunately the shockwaves causes the delicate log pose to shatter, Nami stares blankly at the shards for a minute

 

‘Sanji’ she calls softly, the cook turns with a wide smile

 

‘Yes Nami-swan?’ he asks, getting a punch to the face for his troubles

 

‘You idiot! You just screwed us all! We needed that Log Pose, without it we’re sunk!’ she yells directly into his face

 

‘Hey Crocus how long does it take to turn one of these things?’ Kaos asks, Nami turns slowly to see the 1st mate fiddling with another Log Pose

 

‘Where’d you get that?’

 

‘Loguetown’

 

**‘WHAT!’**

 

_ Flashback _

 

Kaos walks through the streets with no destination in mind there was still quite a bit of time till they all had to meet up and he was bored. It was then he noticed something out the corner of his eyes: a device that looked like a combination of a compass and a snowglobe. (Anyone got a better description, I’m all ears)

 

‘I see you’re captivated by the Log Pose’ the stall owner says catching the purplette’s attention

 

‘Log Pose? You mean the compass?’ he asks curiously

 

‘In the Blue’s it’s a compass, but on the Grand Line it’s the only way to get anywhere’ the woman explains ‘I presume that’s why you’re on this island, like most of our visitors due to it’s proximity to Reverse Mountain’

 

Kaos nods ‘Yep. I should probably take one, though our navigator probably already has might as well have a spare’ he says, passing over the beri

 

‘These are quite delicate’

 

Kaos frowns ‘Not a good thing to hear given our Captain…make it 5’

 

_ Flashback End _

 

Why didn’t you say anything before now?’ Nami yells angrily

 

‘I thought you actually got one while we were in Loguetown, didn’t know you hadn’t till your panic attack a few minutes ago’ he explains, knocking the wind out of Nami’s sails but the ginger smiles when he hands her one of his spares, still fiddling with the one on his own wrist.

 

At this point Laboon pops up, bringing with him a barely conscious Luffy (having been knocked in by Sanji’s kicks) and those 2 weirdoes from earlier.

 

Sanji, seeing a pretty girl immediately helps her up, though she’s clearly still a little creeped out about the chef

 

‘Hey, we need a favour’ 9 says, catching their attention

 

‘Whisky Peak?’ Luffy repeats, wondering if all Grand Line islands will have weird names like this one

 

‘Yes, we need assistance returning to our village’ he explains

 

‘But where’s your ship?’ Kaya asks, knowing they clearly had to have had one to get here in the first place

 

‘Wednesday sighs ‘It was destroyed, during our original attempt on the whale’

 

Nami smirks as she gets in their faces ‘Speaking of that it’s kind of pushing things asking us for a lift after trying to kill us and our friend’ she says, yeah now he wasn’t trying to eat them Nami was admitting Laboon was a rather friendly giant whale.

 

‘Listen we just need a ride home, nothing more. Please we can see you’re good people despite being pirates, can’t you just do this one little thing for us?’ Miss Wednesday asks, head dropped submissively

 

Sanji scoffs lightly ‘Good people, how’d they completely miss you Kaos, some of us are half your size’ the response from the 1st mate was to punch him into the dirt.

 

‘You know now seems like a good time to tell you… we kind of broke the pose. Still want to ride with us?’ the navigator has her regretful face on, while Kaos, Alvida and Luffy were holding in laughter

 

‘YOU BROKE IT!’ Wednesday and 9 yell before flopping in sad piles

 

‘A hem’ both look up to a smirking Nami ‘We could still take you’ she offers with a shark like grin

 

‘But you said…’ Wednesday begins but Nami waves her off

 

‘Yeah, these idiots broke it but Sparkles got some more before we got her, so we can still get around’ Alvida explains as Nami had gone all creepy weirdo with her slasher smile, to the point even Kaos was beginning to worry (Kaya and Usopp skipping worried and going straight to trying to hide on the ship, were it not for Luffy and Zoro)

 

‘It’s all good, you can ride with us’ Luffy just comes out and says, Nami pouts as she was going to charge them through the nose, while the others were just glad it was over, even if they did have to put up with these weirdoes as a result. ‘You said your home is called Whiskey Peak? Good a place as any to start’

 

‘Thank you, thank you’ Both agents blubbered, to which Luffy just shrugged

 

‘Don’t worry about it. It’s all good’ he says before flashing a wide, D grin.

 

**TBC**

 

LW: Well that’s Laboon’s Arc done, such a nice fellow.

Laboon: [Uninteligable moaning]

LW: Sorry bud but I can’t bring you with me either, different universes and all that

Laboon: [Sad grumble]

LW: Guilt trip me why don’t you? Anyway, read and review, see you in 2 weeks.

 

_ New skills/techniques/Lore _

 

**Shimmer** : High speed technique, Kaos being able to cross short distances basically in a flash or as the title suggests, shimmer of light. Other than the inherent damage increased speed does to attacks, it is also good for disorientating opponents.

 

**_Laboon’s crew_** : This isn’t the last we see or hear from them, not sirie. It’ll take a while but they’ll show up in the story again one day

 

**_Mr. 9 and Miss Wednesday_** : Obviously not there real names, you’ll just have to wait for the next chapter for them to make any sense.


	23. Whiskey Peak

LW: Ah Whisky Peak, where shit starts to get real… no wait that’s the next chapter. Oh well, please enjoy anyway

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Whiskey Peak, the island that welcomes pirates?

 

‘It’s snowing’ Nami gasps

 

Kaos chuckles ‘It’s the Grand Line, logic and reason can go fuck itself’ he says, surprised the bluenette nods in agreement with him, just as lightning streaked across the sky

 

‘While crude he has a point, The Grand Line functions under a completely different set of rules than any of the Blues, nothing out there can be trusted while on the sea, or do you not remember that the Log Pose is the only reason you have any idea where you’re going? Speaking of which have you been keeping a careful eye on it Miss Nami?’ she asks with a tiny smirk, which drops in fear when Nami starts yelling at her, at which point the taller StrawHat stops caring and watches Luffy and Usopp behave like children while Sanji shovels snow like he’s Nami’s body slave or something (he wishes ;D). How Zoro could sleep through this is anyone’s guess, and finally we round up the crew with Alvida and Kaya, both who are as wrapped up in their blankets as their travelling companions but unlike those 2 idiots weren’t complaining anywhere near as much (Alvida complained about the cold when the snow started falling seeing as compared to everyone else, even Nami she was wearing half nothing, but after stealing a blanket stopped as there was no reason to keep doing so)

 

It was at this point any peace was broken when Nami checked her pose… and realised they were going in the wrong direction. After the expected screaming and swearing, as well as the 2 idiots being forced by Nami to join the guys and Alvida in working the steering, they had the ship do a 180 and all was good for a little while… well besides the snow and lightning but even that was only temporary. What was less temporary and more dangerous was the HUGE ASS ICEBERG that popped up out of nowhere in front of them.

 

‘Iceberg at 10 O’clock’

‘Fog rolling in’

‘Hey the iceberg’s vanished, does that mean we’re home free?’

‘IDIOT!’

 

Nami wanted to cave her captain’s head in at this moment but had bigger things to worry about, such as her and Kaos trying to stop them all dying by being smashed into the aforementioned iceberg. They made it but just barely and Merry started to take on water, prompting Usopp and Sanji to rush down and patch the leak (as any other able bodied people were sleeping, prisoners or DF users so no water allowed). Of course this was just the beginning as they went from the fog to a hellish storm, which had even the Grand Line natives looking worried

 

_‘We’re all going to die’_

 

‘Pull in the sails, the winds too strong we’ll capsize. Usopp fix the leaks and start bailing, we’re taking on too much water as it is without doing it from all angles’ Nami orders as they enter the storm proper, everyone running around, deferring to either their navigator or 1st mate, usually depending on who was saying what, mostly Nami as Kaos was more worried about what he was capable of working on and letting the upper management be handled by the less physically capable crewmate, though still called out any problems in line of sight he was unable to deal with himself.

 

After what felt like hours the storm passed leaving everything as calm as it had been back with Crocus and Laboon, at which point EVERYONE collapsed on deck, muscles aching and minds slightly cracked by the mayhem that was the Grand Line. It was this that Zoro woke up to and promptly put his foot in it; to the point if the others weren’t so exhausted they would have kicked his ass. It was then he noticed 9 and Wednesday, equally tired, and sprawled out as the others

 

‘What are you 2 doing here?’ he asks in confusion

 

‘Detour’ Luffy answers ‘we’re dropping them off in their village on the way, it’s called Whiskey Peak’

 

Zoro raises and eyebrow ‘Since when did we become a transport vessel for idiots?’

 

‘Since Luffy stepped foot on the Merry’ Kaos mutters, Nami producing a noise that sounded like a cough, snort and laugh, and then choking on air.

 

The swordsman sighs ‘You’re right, stupid question. Now back to you 2… what were you’re names again?’

 

The agents gulp ‘I’m Mr. 9’ ‘And I’m Miss Wednesday’

 

‘Hm, yeah that’s what I thought, the problem is they sound really familiar, I just can’t put my finger on why’ at this point either Nami had regained enough energy or she was simply running on bile and wrath as she stands up, walking over to the moss haired teen and proceeded to beat the ever loving shit out of him.

 

_ Not long after _

 

‘Okay everyone, here it is. Whiskey Peak’ Nami announces everyone on deck to see their first Grand Line Island.

 

‘Like everything else so far on the Line, it’s certainly unique’

 

‘Look at those cacti they’re freaking huge!’

 

‘And the fog, are you sure this isn’t Misty Peak instead?’

 

With their location confirmed 9 and Wednesday leave as idiots often do, hopping off the side of a moving Caravel

 

‘Ehh…..’ was the general consensus from the crew

 

‘Good thing they weren’t Devil Fruit users or that would have been even stupider’ Kaos notes offhand

 

‘True’ Nami nods before rechecking that everything was running smoothly and they were reaching the village without causing problems.

 

When they reached the island’s settlement they were met with a curious site: the locals were cheering their arrival, not running away or arming themselves which was the usual reaction to pirates entering your village. It really threw the more intelligent members of the group for a ride (okay, everyone bar Luffy)

 

‘Welcome Pirates, to Whiskey Peak’ a large man with hair rolls resembling a powdered wig greets them ‘I am the mayor of this swell little town. Let us throw you a great feast and we can all party’ Luffy, Sanji and Usopp grin widely, while Zoro, Nami, Kaos and Alvida had raised eyebrows as well as an expression best described as _‘Are you kidding me?’_ written across their faces.

 

_ Late Afternoon/Early Evening _

 

Kaos smiles as he and Kaya slowly made their way through the drinks they’d been given. Luffy was emptying their kitchen of food, Usopp was doing his speciality: spinning tales to amaze and astound, Sanji was practically in heaven with about 20 ladies hanging off his every word and finally we move to the heavy drinkers of the crew who managed to get roped into a drinking contest: Zoro having just bowed out, but Nami, Alvida and a solidly built black nun were all that were left.

 

‘This is quite the surprise, to find a place like this so welcoming in the Grand Line’ Kaya says quietly, nibbling away at one of the few plates of food that hadn’t been inhaled by their voracious captain

 

‘Yeah, quite a strange little town, to so openly welcome pirates’ he shrugs before waving over someone to refill his and their doctor / gunslinger’s cups

 

_ Later _

 

With the last of the straw hats passed out, Igarapoi and the nun meet up with Mr. 9 and Miss Wednesday

 

‘You were supposed to bring us whale, not another pirate crew, we have enough problems without more mouths to feed’ she grumbles, ditching her disguise

 

‘Sorry Miss Monday, these people stopped us killing the whale, they also broke our Pose so this was the only way to get back’ 9 explains

 

‘It doesn’t matter’ Igarapoi says surprising them

 

‘But Mr. 8…’ Wednesday begins but 8 pulls out a couple pages

 

‘With the bounties we get from this crew we’ll be okay for a while’ he smiles creepily as the others stare in shock

 

‘That straw hat wearing dumbass is worth 38 million!’ 9 and Wednesday yell, Monday just stared on in shock

 

‘I thought it went without saying, appearances can be deceptive, especially considering our line of work’ 8 scolds them ‘Now we need to strip the ship of all it’s valuables then deal with these pirates, even if only 3 of them have actual bounties’

 

‘So why don’t we just kill them while they’re down?’ 9 asks, getting lightly slapped on the back of the head by Monday

 

‘Idiot, just because the bounty says dead or alive doesn’t mean both are of equal value. We loose 30% if we arrive with a corpse’ 8 explains with a grimace ‘The WG prefer to hold public executions so pay extra for the opportunity’

 

‘So this is Baroque Works’ the agents heads shoot up in the direction of the voice, spotting Zoro smirking, his hands resting on the hilt of Wado and Kitetsu.

 

‘How did you know about us?’ 9 asks

 

‘You’re not subtle for one thing: mercenary/bounty hunters, no names, numbers for guys, days for girls, all working for a shadowy figure right at the top who nobody actually knows. As for how I know specifically, I was a bounty hunter myself before joining this crew, one of you guys tried recruiting me, I turned him down’

 

8 grimaces ‘Well if you do know all our secrets, then I guess we’re going to have to kill you’

 

‘Is that so, looks like all we can do is fight, what do you think our chances are?’ Zoro asks as another pirate joins him on the roof. Cracking his knuckles Luffy answers ‘We’re going to kick their asses’ he grins widely, stretching the scar under his right eye

 

**Gomu Gomu no Bazooka**

 

The shockwave pushes a large group out of the way so Luffy bounces into the gap in time to get smacked in the face with Mr. 9’s bat. All this foes is knock his hat off which he happily tells the red head

 

‘Rubber body, blunt attacks don’t do much’ he says, watching 9’s expression turn to terror as he winds back…

 

**Gomu Gomu no Bullet**

 

…and punches the idiot through the window, jumping in after him.

 

_‘1 down, 103 to go’_ Zoro thinks with an eye roll

 

Luckily it appeared regular Baroque work minions weren’t hired for their brains, as initially Zoro didn’t even need to unsheathe any of his swords, the idiots all shot each other in their overzealous attempts to kill him, even coming close to killing Mr. 8 except he fired first. After that little slice of mayhem Zoro decided to go for the stealthy approach, something not normally possible since he joined Luffy’s crew.

 

‘I’ll give them one thing, this’ll be a good chance to see what the new steel can do’ Zoro thinks aloud, grabbing the hilts of Kitetsu 3 and Yubashiri, just as some of the bounty hunters find him. As they were pretty much just random idiots with guns Zoro didn’t need all 3 swords, this time just drawing Yubashiri and cutting the group down _‘Light, well balanced, and wicked sharp no wonder Iponmatsu was so proud of you’_ he grins before running away, getting ganged up on by more bounty hunters with a little assistance from Miss Monday, but his new blades seemed to deal with the threats rather easily… some a little **too** well.

 

‘Listen Sandi Kitetsu, I don’t care if you’re cursed or not a good sword only cuts what it’s master directs it to, that guy nearly redecorated the roof with his guts. Little bastard’ Zoro scolds the blade, not expecting any kind of response but given how incredible the Kitetsu cursed blades were he wouldn’t be surprised if the 1st Kitetsu did speak. Due to his new blade being a violent little shit Zoro was a little distracted disciplining it, leading Baroque Works agents to think they could take advantage of him, they almost succeeded when…

 

**Gum Gum Whip**

 

… they were tossed aside by a rubber leg, causing the swordsman to smile

 

‘Took your time their Captain’ he half complains, Luffy almost pouting

 

‘Is that anyway to talk to the guy bringing in reinforcements?’ he asks one of the bounty hunters falling with a slash across his chest, Kaos grinning widely as he approaches ‘Hey, where’d Alvida go?’ Luffy wonders aloud

 

Kaos shrugs ‘Guess she slipped away while you were saving Zoro’s ass. Doesn’t matter as long as someone takes them down as someone takes them down we don’t need to all be bundled together’ as he says that what felt like the shockwave of an explosion passes through them

 

‘What was that?’ Luffy asks

 

‘Something bad, that’s for sure’ Zoro replies with a grimace, before the trio run off in the direction of the commotion…and instantly regretted it

 

It was a killing field; blood painted the wals and ground, large numbers of dead or dying, some were little more than mangled body parts and red goop

 

‘What happened here?’ Luffy gasps, Zoro and Kaos shrug, till the swordsman steps forward and a different sound than stone or bloody mess catches his attention. Looking down he sees it’s some bloodied paper, which he picks up and opens. It’s a bounty for Iron Mace Alvida.

 

_‘Hm, the picture’s either wrong or well out of date’_ Zoro thinks till he hears Kaos swear over his shoulder ‘What?’

 

‘I think I know what happened. Simplest way to put it is that photo is accurate before Loguetown, just before we met you we had a run in with Alvida, and she was … what would you describe her as?’

 

‘A beached whale in a cowboy hat’ Luffy supplies

 

‘Thank you Luffy. Now this may come as a surprise but Alvida is sensitive about her weight and appearance overall. Luffy got Koby to call her ugly and she nearly turned him into a bloody smear if not for Luffy getting between him and taking the hit with his empty rubber head, actually the ship probably would have looked a lot like this alley if she’d actually managed to hit the pink haired little brat. So given the difference in appearance between that and now, imagine how she’d react to any comments about her previous um, girth’ Zoro tried and shudders just as the wall beside them explodes.

 

‘Bastards!’ Alvida screams, swinging wildly, her fruits ability meaning even though her clothes, hat and club were covered in blood and viscera her skin was as clean and dirt free as when they stepped off the boat. The guys bravely… run in the opposite direction

 

‘There you are!’ they turn to see the remaining number agents had found them

 

‘3 on 3, least it’s fair now’ Kaos says mostly to himself, but Wednesday laughs then whistles

 

‘Fair? Carue to me!’ she calls

 

**_Quack_ **

 

‘Over here dumbass!’ She yells at the enormous, duck, the pirates sweat drop

 

‘I’ll take the girl and her duck’

 

Zoro didn’t get to make a decision as he had to quickly dodge a tackle from Miss Monday, the muscular woman clearly trying to kill him with her bare hands

 

Luffy shrugs ‘Guess it’s you and me Mr. Mayor’ he says

 

8 frowns and reaches for his tie, revealing guns hidden in his hair with a tug of his strings ‘Yes but not for long’

 

**Igarapapapapa!**

 

Luffy gulps as he leaps out of the way of the machine gun fire, Mr. 8 simply turning his head or body to keep him in his weapon’s sights.

 

‘So besides the duck what you got?’ Kaos asks curiously

 

Wednesday chuckles ‘Oh, so much more’ she answers then begins to… well the best description would be belly dancing, the purplette’s eyes twitch and he almost stumbles

 

‘ _Shit! What’s she doing? It’s no Devil Fruit power that’s for sure_ ’ he thinks, the dizziness starting to cause a headache

 

‘You don’t know why I wear this do you?’ she asks, though it sounds like she’s underwater

 

‘Well it’s too long and there’s very little cleavage so you’re clearly not working undercover as a hooker, honestly I just thought you wore what you liked, explains 9 outfit too’ Kaos replies with a groan, trying to focus on altering his right arm

 

‘No, the dress is part of my most devastating attack, my **Enchanting Vertigo Dance**. Now face my wrath!’

 

**Peacock Slasher**

 

**Homunculus**

 

Miss Wednesday squeaks when the silver spikes stop an inch from her face, the threads of her weapon tangled up and dangling uselessly

 

‘H-h-h-how? What are you?’

 

‘A mildly annoyed Devil Fruit user, with a whole bag of tricks still to use’ he spreads his fingers; the cord tightens before snapping, the slasher hitting the ground with a slight click. With a small grin he retracts his digits, the reflective substance blending back into his skin before walking over to the frozen agent, just as he places his hand on Hebi he gets tackled by a super spot-billed duck (No, that’s their actual name) knocking him over

 

‘Thanks Carue’ Wednesday says as she hops on her back ‘Now, away!’

 

**_Quack_ **

 

‘Go faster!’ she yells, slapping the duck on her hat

 

**_Quack, quack, quack, quack_ **

 

So girl and duck run away, with an annoyed pirate on their heels

 

 

_‘I hate to say this but I think I’m bored’_ Luffy thinks with a sigh, now it was just the 2 of them he was a lot more half assed with his dodges, sure he was still avoiding getting hit but if it did then no big deal. The guy’s saxophone shotgun was cool, but the pellets bounced off his rubber gut doing as much damage as Makino’s son with a foam ball… aka nil.

 

‘Hm you’re strong Straw Hat, maybe the poster is accurate’ 8 muses aloud, Luffy grins in response

 

‘Thanks, now let’s finish this’ he throws his arms back, letting then extend by several feet causing Mr. 8 to pale

 

**Gum Gum Bazooka**

 

The shockwave sends the man flying into the air over a good portion of Whiskey Peak and dropping him directly in front of Carue and Miss Wednesday

 

‘Iga…Mr 8!’ Wednesday screams almost letting it slip before composing herself very slightly, the duck stopping beside the man and began to nudge him to check for signs of life. When he let out a pained groan she backs away

 

‘Straw Hat bastard’ 8 groans as he pulls himself to his feet

 

‘Hey, that’s my little brother you’re talking about’ Wednesday turns to see the now frowning 1st mate

 

‘You’re still following us?’ she asks and Kaos chuckles

 

‘You guys did try to kill us, I’m not exactly in the mood to let it g…’ he raises his khopesh to block the swing of 9’s back ‘Didn’t I kill you already?’

 

9 scoffs ‘Not a chance baby. Besides, I think I’d remember an ugly mug like you …ow’ he yelps, clutching his bloody nose as the taller guy had just punched him in the face

 

‘We brought you here, you lead us into a trap, pretty sure you should remember THAT at least’ before anything else can be said an explosion went off between them ‘What was that?’ he asks in confusion, Luffy and Zoro appearing soon after, having heard it go off

 

‘That would be me’ a man in shades and a trench coat says stepping into the view ‘Mr. 5, Baroque Works Officer Agent’ his companion, a woman dressed head to toe in lemon yellow including her umbrella and a hat which looks like an actual lemon, popping out from behind him

 

‘And I’m Miss Valentine’s Day’ she greets with a giggle

 

‘And you’re both paramecia class devil fruit users’ Kaos adds, taking a the look of surprise of the woman’s face, mostly due to the man’s shades hiding his wide eyes

 

‘Oh good, you’re here assist’ 9 says hopefully, while 8 and Wednesday looked suspicious

 

‘You’re failures have been noted but aren’t our concerns, we’re here on the Boss’s orders. His directive was simple _‘someone knows my secret, deal with them’_ ’

 

‘So we’ll be taking out the royal and going about out business’ the woman laughs haughtily, the pirates noticing all 3 agents pale or tense

 

Finally Mr. 9 snaps ‘Wait I’m not really a prince, it’s just the aes…’

 

‘You will not harm the princess while I’m here’ Mr. 8 yells throwing himself in front of Miss Wednesday

 

**Igarapapapapa!**

 

His hair guns fire hitting Mr. 5, causing a massive explosion, while Valentines Day sneaks off in the blast. Panting as his previous injuries flare up. Igaram releases his tie and the shots cease. Of course it is this moment when Mr. 5 rushes out of the smoke, slamming his fist into the older man’s chest, another explosion throwing him back into Miss Wednesday and Carue

 

‘Igaram!’ Wednesday screams as she tries to check him for damage

 

‘Well you tried at least’ Valentine’s Day says as she drops down beside 5 who grunts

 

‘Princess Nefatari Vivi of Alabasta, Igaram of the Royal Guard, for infiltrating Baroque Works and discovering Mr. 0’s true name, you must die’ he says, holding a photo of the Alabastan royal… who looks identical to Miss Wednesday.

 

_‘HOLY SHIT!’_

 

TBC

 

LW: One of those rare moments when a planned TBC falls exactly where I wanted it to, so yeah Miss Wednesday is the princess of Alabasta and Mr. 8 is the head of Alabasta Security (that’s his official title according to the anime, but Royal Guard sounds cooler so that’s his title from me :D)

Also yes, Zoro kicking everyone’s asses by himself was awesome, but we have other people in this crew so they kind of need to do things. Therefore I kicked a few idiots awake and they did there level best to wreck shit.

 

**_ Techniques _ **

 

**Homunculus:** The moment we see what I mean for Kaos being a special paramecia and the difference between paramecia and logia. Freeform control, which is what he uses in order to alter and manipulate his form when his fruit is active. In this case he extends his fingers into long spikes similar to Lust from Full Metal Alchemist, which is partly where the name comes from. I suppose Envy could also be considered part of his skill set, but it’s a different technique/skill tree entirely rather than the broad term of the Homunculus ability.

 

**Peacock Slashers:** Vivi’s signature weapon, a sharp jewel or several on a wire.

**Enchanting Vertigo Dance:** Vivi dances, the spirals on her dress causing her opponents to get dizzy and confused, leaving them open to attacks.

What this also means is Vivi is currently wearing what she did in the manga rather than the anime, as they used perfume for some reason and her dress was stripy rather than having circles


	24. Straw Hats Vs Baroque Works Round 1 (well that was the plan)

LW: Here it is, part 2 of the Whisky Peak Arc, and as the title states I was originally going to have a big Baroque Works/Straw Hat fight, but like the episodes this chapter is based on stuff got in the way and we got something else. Oh well, least one of my favourite characters got to finally show up in my fic :D

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Straw Hats Vs Baroque Works Round 1 (Well that was the original plan)

 

‘Wait, you’re an actual princess?’ 9 yells in shock, gulping when Vivi nods

 

‘Whoa… Hey Kaos, you nearly got your ass kicked by a pretty, pink princess shishishi’ Luffy laughs, Zoro cracks a smile and Kaos groans

 

‘1 she didn’t kick my ass and 2, she’s less pretty, pink princess and more stripper’

 

‘Can’t argue with you there’

 

‘I’m a little busy right now can you hold off your stupidity for just a few minutes!’ Vivi yells, surprising the pirates that she had actually remembered they were there. So they were doubly surprised when Igaram tried to grab them

 

‘Please’ Igaram wheezes, spitting a little blood as he speaks ‘Save the princess’ causing 5 to laugh

 

‘Are you that desperate you’d beg the people you tricked and tried to kill to help you? We’re doing them a favour dealing with you’

 

**My Nose Fancy cannon**

 

_Ping_

 

Vivi and Igaram look on in shock as Zoro grimaces ‘Ugh, I just sliced someone’s snot’

 

**KABOOM!!!!**

 

2 explosions go off behind him ‘Your odd friend was right by the way’ 5 explains ‘We did both eat Devil Fruits, mine being the Bomu Bomu no mi. I’m a bomb human, I can explode any part of my body without doing damage to myself’

 

More annoying laughter causes Kaos to look up and see Miss Valentine floating above him ‘And I ate the Kilo Kilo no mi, I can alter my weight between 1 and 10,000 kilos at will’ she says, waiting until she’s directly above the researcher before letting go of the umbrella, increasing her weight to 10,000 kg as she does

 

**10,000 kilo press**

 

_Jiggle_

 

‘Ah you pervert, how dare you touch my ahhhhhhhhhh!’ Valentine screams as Kaos catches her, then tosses her at 5, the building they get knocked into demolished by the explosion he causes

 

‘You mean the ass you tried to kill me with?’ Kaos asks, shaking his hands and wriggling his fingers to try return feeling to them after the impact damage, even partly reflected back into Miss Valentine’s 10,000kg state

 

It was then the rumble from before started up again, swiftly followed by Alvida crashing through one of the remaining buildings ‘Damn it Luffy, control your girlfriend, or at least get her to stop tearing the town apart’ Zoro grumbles

 

‘She’s not my… ah forget it’ Luffy throws up his hands before heading over to where Alvida is, since they last saw her she had stopped yelling, instead just a pit of silent rage

 

The downward swing of her mace was about as (in)effective as the last time she did it, what was surprising was that Luffy’s return jab to her ribs slid right off her skin and embedded itself in the wall for a moment

 

‘The fuck, I thought Luffy could interact with her’ Zoro thinks aloud, to which Kaos shrugs and Vivi looks confused

 

‘Maybe ALL attacks slide off her, maybe her mood effects her fruit’s power. We just don’t know’ their thoughts were interrupted by Luffy flying through the air and landing in front of them ‘That I did see coming though, doesn’t matter if does no damage, the energy behind that mace would send a man flying from an upward or even a side swing’ he smirks as Luffy bounces up as if nothing happened and proceeded to plant his fist in Alvida’s gut once more (Good thing Sanji’s not around to see that) the blood soaked beauty skids across the street till she smashed into a wall

 

This continued for longer than it should have but less time than it felt to the spectators: Alvida tosses Luffy around with swings of her mace, while Luffy returns with strikes to her flat stomach and face (the sole strike to her chest, her breasts bounced the attack back and had him basically punch himself in the face). Eventually it comes down to the final blow…

 

‘Calm the FUCK down!’

 

…delivered by Nami to the back of both of their heads, causing them to slam headfirst into the pavement and Vivi to come this [] close to wetting herself as those 2 had been wrecking the place with little damage being done to each other, even taking out 5 and Valentine’s Day when they tried to counterattack, and showed no signs of stopping… and this ginger slip of a girl took both of them out in 1 punch.

 

‘Sorry Nami’ the 2 grumble, causing Kaos and Zoro to snigger behind Vivi (who was too worried to notice her missing companion)

 

‘We have more important things to do than fight each other, what was that even for anyway?’

 

Luffy shrugs ‘Alvida was on a rampage, seemed like a good idea at the time’

 

‘And how did that happen?’ Nami asks, the others also curious as to the cause

 

Alvida sighs but looks elsewhere ‘I lost my temper. I was following the guys to try find and assist Zoro when I spotted a group of them sneaking around our mossheaded friend. So hoping to cut them off I skidded in front of them, hefted my mace and told them they stood no chance against the might of Iron Mace Alvida. They laughed, they fucking laughed’ at this Alvida clenches her fists ‘The apparent leader of the group pulls out my bounty and says how if I was trying to pretend to be a fearsome pirate to pick one I actually resemble like Nico Robin or Boa Hancock (Why I’m comparing her to those babes I don’t know… oh yeah Nami’s still quite flat chested at the moment compared to post time skip Nami, same for Vivi) rather than this fat fuck. Then the bastard told me to run along while they dealt with the others, said he’ll find a use for me when they’re done. He didn’t last another 5 seconds, at which point I saw red and zoned out until I tasted pavement a minute ago’

 

‘You called it’ Zoro mutters and Kaos nods in amusement

 

Alvida sighs as she drops her mace ‘I need a break, go soak my head or something. Call me when we actually have a plan on what to do next’ she mutters and walks off slowly, the others sweatdrop then shrug. With the moment of silence Nami turns to Vivi

 

‘Now, what was this about you being a princess in need of transportation?’ she asks with a grin that worries the princess

 

Vivi blinks ‘Yes, that’s true’ she begins

 

‘Great. We’ll bring you there… for a price. How does a billion beri sound?’ Nami asks, eyes already shifting into beri symbols

 

‘Oh no’ the guys groan

 

Vivi sighs ‘Thanks but no thanks, though I appreciate what you’ve done for me already’

 

Nami blinks ‘Why not? You’re a princess and these idiots are crazy strong, plus I doubt you’re hurting for money’

 

‘Do you know anything about the kingdom of Alabasta miss Navigator?’ Vivi asks

 

‘Nope’

 

‘Just heard about it today’

 

‘Not in any of my books, sorry’

 

The bluenette sighs once more ‘My homeland was a good place, a peaceful one. But now… Now we’re caught in the grip of Civil War. There were murmurs of discontent in recent years but it all came to a head a little while ago and the entire island is a mess of chaos and despair. Then I discovered that someone else was pulling the strings, tearing my kingdom apart using it’s own citizens. Baroque Works. Think about it, why else would a princess join a shady mercenary company like this if not to uncover their secrets and discover why they’re trying to raise my homeland to the sand it started as. So I went to Igaram and managed to convince him to help me infiltrate the company. Their stated goal is to make an ideal nation, but their boss’s true plan is to take over Alabasta! I won’t let him do this, I NEED to get back and warn everyone’

 

Nami groans before nodding ‘That makes sense, unfortunately. No money lying around during an upheaval as bad as you make this sound’

 

‘So did you find out who this Mr. 0 guy is?’ Luffy asks giddily, causing Vivi to pale

 

‘I can’t tell you, your life is in danger as it is simply associating with me. If you knew I’d made myself an enemy of one of the 7 Warlords, against Sir Crocodile you’ll have targets on your backs too’ she then realises what she said and quickly covers her mouth

 

‘Crocodile’s Mr 0?’ They yell, few noticing a vulture and otter appear when they said that

 

‘Hey Luffy, do we get a raise for taking down a Warlord?’ Kaos asks with a smirk

 

‘You… You’ll do it? Even if it means fighting a Warlord?’ Vivi asks in shock

 

‘Yep. We’re going to do this. Onward to Alabasta!’

 

‘Nope, no way, na ah, I didn’t join this crew to charge headfirst into a Warlord’s blades. I’m out of here’ Nami bluntly declares before running in the opposite direction

 

‘She does know the only way off the island is the Going Merry right?’ Luffy asks, to which both Kaos and Zoro shrug, neither knew, nor wanted to know what went on in the ginger thief’s head.

 

After at least 10 minutes of standing around for the guys and Vivi, Nami finally returns, notable tear tracks down her cheeks

 

‘It’s no use, they’ll come for us no matter what because we know the secret now’ she clenches her fists and tries to put on a brave face (the older crewmates, aware of her cowardly nature were actually impressed by the attempt) ‘our best chance… no our only chance is to keep going forward. We’re probably screwed either way, but this way we might just win’ she states, managing to stop her knees knocking.

 

‘Why are we screwed?’ Alvida asks, coming back to the group now she had fully calmed down

 

‘The Shichibukai Sir Crocodile is the Mr. 0 Vivi has to take down to save Alabasta from Baroque Works’ Kaos explains, getting a punch to the head from Nami, but still grinning like a loon

 

‘You idiot!’ she shrieks as a vulture and sea otter appear on one of the nearly low walls…

 

**Traptrix: Game Over!**

 

… Before being promptly eviscerated by a curtain of razor wire that escaped Hebi, currently held vertically in a reverse grip

 

‘That should buy us a few hours at best but Crocoman will hear about Whiskey Peak, be it from 5 and Valentine’s Day or whoever Alvida didn’t use to redecorate the island with. Let’s go’ he says, returning Hebi to it’s khopesh form and walking back towards the ship, Luffy running to get their still sleeping crewmates, while the others followed the 1st mate

 

Running into the building they’d been allowed crash in Luffy found the others exactly where they’d left them: Kaya curled up against Usopp, his hand resting protectively on her hip, while Sanji quietly snored while doing a good impression of a starfish

 

Not feeling they had time to wake them gently Luffy just grabbed Sanji by the leg and Usopp by the nose before dragging them back to the Merry. Having rolled out of Usopp’s embrace in the scuffle Kaya watched for a moment before tiredly rising to her feet and walking in the direction their idiot captain took the others

 

‘Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow’

 

_ Meanwhile _

 

‘Princess!’ The others (the ones not with Luffy right now) turn and immediately wish they didn’t as Igaram was standing in an outfit almost identical to Vivi, carrying 3 large sandbags under his arms ‘I have a plan’

 

‘I really hope it explains the outfit or I’m stabbing you in the kidney’ Kaos grumbles

 

‘Actually it does. Sooner or later Baroque Works intelligence will learn of what happened here and given you know the Boss’s identity…’

 

‘…they’ll send at least 1,000 agents’ Vivi finishes

 

‘Exactly. So dressed like this I’d disguise myself as you and sail straight back to Alabasta, meanwhile you’ll go with this crew and take the long way using the Log Pose to island hop home. I’ll pass on the information if I get there, but failing that I’ll at least be able to stop them following you’

 

‘Hey Kaos looks like the old guy just made your plan better’ Zoro jokes

 

‘Good, then if we’re all in agreement let us depart. Vivi, the Eternal Pose to Alabasta’ he asks and the bluenette reaches into her pockets and pulls out a Log Pose/Hourglass hybrid

 

‘What’s an eternal pose?’ Nami asks

 

‘You don’t know?’

 

‘East Blue natives the lot of us, don’t need them back home’

 

Igaram nods in understanding ‘Oh, well an eternal pose is similar to a log pose except where a log pose changes as you travel, directing you to the next one in the chain, and eternal pose is permanently locked, in this case it will always point in the direction of Alabasta’

 

‘Like a compass pointing North’

 

‘More or less. No I must say goodbye, and see you soon Vivi’ he is surpsied to receive a brief hug from the princess before she is standing straight and regal

 

‘We will see you soon, Igaram, until then good luck’ the man smiles and makes his way to the boat he’d already prepared

 

‘How long do you think he’ll last?’ Alvida asks just outside Vivi’s hearing

 

‘Not long, they want Vivi dead not captured, they could blow the ship out of the water with no worries’ Kaos answers, though like the smooth human he was curious as to how far the Captain will get, and how long he’ll be able to be a decoy/distraction for Vivi/their movements.

 

Unfortunately for everyone the researcher was right, the ship not even making it to the horizon when it was engulfed in a massive explosion. This spured everyone to move as quickly as possible, except Vivi who had turned catatonic due to witnessing Igaram’s fiery demise. In the end Nami and Alvida just shoved her in the direction of the Going Merry

 

_ Back to regular time _

 

Kaos stops and his lips curl into a smirk just as he steps onto the Merry deck, though only Zoro who had climbed/jumped up the side of the ship (paraphrasing he said ‘Ramps are for pussies’) saw it.

 

‘Why’d you stop, we’re in a hurry?’ Nami ask/yells before she yelps as Luffy, Sanji and Usopp speed past, Kaya following much more slowly

 

‘Let’s go!’ Luffy orders, while the other guys groan as they try get their bearings

 

‘Wait, what about Carue?’ Vivi asks, worried about her spotted duck

 

‘You mean this thing? Got here before we did’ Zoro replies, pointing to the duck standing behind him

 

‘You were going to abandon me here weren’t you, you little bitch?’ Vivi yells with pointed teeth, breathing deeply she turns to Nami ‘There’s a tributary that should get us to open ocean much quicker, it starts over there’

 

‘Got it’ Nami nods and runs to the controls, meanwhile Alvida explains the situation to Kaya, Usopp and Sanji (Well she knocks the guys out for their yelling and complaining and slowly explains everything to Kaya, who as expected looks about ready to loose her lunch) and everyone else makes sure the Merry doesn’t crash into the edges of the waterway in the thick fog

 

‘Hey the fog’s clearing, think that mean we’re out?’ Luffy asks

 

‘Yeah, open ocean, now we just need to island hop to Alabasta’ Vivi says with the first relaxed smile she’d had in quite a while

 

‘That was some mighty fine manoeuvring, any less and we could’ve been torn to shreds’ a thickly southern accented female muses with a vocal smile

 

‘Thanks’ Nami says with a smirk… until she realises (along with everyone else) that they didn’t recognise the voice. Turning around they saw a tall, busty woman in a cowgirl hat, thick white furry coat and skimpy purple outfit grinning down at them, Vivi turning a pale shade of green when she recognised the woman

 

‘Okay that’s the rigging secured… oh hey Robin’ Kaos says as he steps away from the mast, his grin widens when her smile falls and the Alabastan tan drains from her naturally pale features

 

‘How do you know Miss All Sunday/that name?’ Vivi and the now named Miss All Sunday ask, the latter losing all traces of her accent.

 

‘In order, I didn’t know she was Miss All Sunday, whatever that means, and…’ he pulls out his bounty book from his cape, stopping somewhere near the end ‘…Neither Robin nor Miss All Sunday wear masks, so identification is simple’ he then pulls out and shows them Nico Robin’s bounty poster, and they can clearly see it’s the woman above them

 

‘That’s from 6 months ago’ Robin gasps in surprise

 

‘I like to keep my records up to date, was a little embarrassed when I found out Arlong had got a 2 million increase while I wasn’t looking. It’s an honour to meet the ‘Devil’s Child’ Nico Robin, don’t see many 80 million criminal just walking around’

 

‘What a coincidence, that’s how much we are worth’ Luffy says with a chuckle (It actually is a coincidence, I didn’t plan it for their combined bounty to equal 80 mill, just be more than canon because they beat Kuro, as well as killed him and Arlong)

 

‘Can we get back to the important part, who’s Miss All Sunday?’ Nami asks, Vivi answering

 

‘High rank agents work in pairs, the men are numbered, and the women have days. Miss All Sunday, she’s partnered with Mr. 0’

 

Crocodile!’

 

‘Yes. She’s the only person allowed know his identity, it’s actually how we learnt it, by tailing her’

 

‘Fufufu. You mean I let you follow me, you think your sloppy tail wouldn’t be noticed by someone like me, who’s been on the run since my preteens. I lead you to Crocodile, mostly to see what you’d do’

 

‘See what I’d do?’ Vivi shrieks, clenching her fists ‘It was you who told Crocodile we knew then, wasn’t it?’ she asks, already knowing the answer

 

‘Why of course, after all I’m not just 0’s partner but his spymaster too. Mi talents make it rather easy these days. Ask Igaram if you need confirmation’

 

‘It was you! You killed him!’ Vivi yells, everyone reaching for their weapons, even Usopp and Sanji appearing armed and ready to deal with the threat, slingshot and pistol in hand respectively

 

‘Sanji, any idea what’s going on?’ Usopp asks

 

‘Nope, but it’s clear this one’s a problem, and dangerous’ the cook replies

 

Robin’s smirk returns as she crosses her arms ‘Y’all need to calm yer tits’ she says and the pirates yelps and drop their weapons, then Luffy’s hat flies off his head into the air and Sunday puts it on over her cowgirl hat ‘How do I look?’

 

‘Give that back, it’s my hat!’ Luffy yells, Sunday grins then her eyes widen when the hat bounces off her head and flies back to the Captain, who laughs ‘See, my hat likes me better’

 

Luffy notices Robin turn an angry glare to Kaos, the only one still smiling (and given his weapon attaches itself to him, the only one still holding theirs) and he sees as she clenches her fist he brings his hand to his throat. What looked to be a twitch of his fingers and Sunday releases, wriggling the fingers of her right hand.

 

‘Anyway, you can unclench princess, Ruffles is still alive and on his way to Alabasta, that was just a message, mostly that we won’t be fooled by such poor deception, if you thought a cross dresser and some sandbags were going to even distract us you’re an idiot. Also I wanted you to actually get there in time to try stop us I have a little gift for you’ she tosses a log pose to the captain who catches it easily ‘That’s an eternal pose to an island just before Alabasta known as Nanimonai island, once there your log will adjust and get you to the end of your journey in 3 days at most’

 

‘No’ Luffy yells, crushing the pose to Robin’s surprise, Vivi and Nami’s shock, horror and anger, and amusement on the part of Kaos and Zoro, having expected nothing less ‘I am the captain of this ship so when I say we’re going the normal way without shortcuts we’re doing that’

 

‘Fufufufufu. You are an interesting boy Straw Hat’ Sunday says with a grin before turning to Vivi and her grin turns into a twisted smirk ‘Little heads up princess, the next island on your journey, is Little Garden. That’s why I’m not here to kill you all…’ she pauses at the snort/scoff from the expected Straw Hats ‘…because you’re not a threat to Crocodile’s plan. Good luck though’ she waves before jumping over the edge of the ship, when the pirates go check they see her sitting on the back of a giant turtle (which had it’s own massive cowboy hat) as it paddles away

 

‘Well that happened. Nami set a course for Little Garden’ Luffy orders, the ginger nods and runs to the controls, while he leads his 1st mate to the front ‘So?’

 

The purplette smiles ‘Every user to set foot on this ship has been paramecia’ he replies

 

Luffy nods ‘So she IS a Devil Fruit user, but you already knew that’ it was a statement not a question

 

‘Yes and what a skilled user she is, like you she takes a seemingly weak and simple ability and uses it to great effectiveness’

 

‘Then it’ll be interesting when we meet next’ he then grins widely ‘I noticed you didn’t actually have to check the book to know who she was’

 

‘You’re point being?’

 

‘Nothing, just don’t get in over you head. Shishishi’ Luffy chuckles before walking away, Kaos sighing deeply and hopes the evening hides the pink of his cheeks, either that or they’ll presume it’s from partial asphyxia.

 

_ With Robin a little later _

 

‘Those pirates are odd but I kind of want to see them again’ Robin muses as a messenger bat flies over and drops off a letter. Confused but also curious she opens the letter and reads it, her eyebrows raise and her teeth clench ‘That bastard Crocodile, she shouldn’t be there, he promised she…’ the thoughts fade as Robin pinches the bridge of her nose, she should have seen this coming, Crocodile only cares about Crocodile, he only keeps promises when it was useful to him, with Operation Utopia so close to fruition he probably didn’t care anymore and with how close she was to completing her own goals she was going to let it slide.

 

Anything happens to Artemis though… she would remind him she was a master assassin and deal with this threat

 

TBC

 

LW: Well one more arc done, also sorry this wasn’t put up at the usual time, it just wasn’t done. I want to blame my birthday being last week, or getting a Switch, but honestly it just wasn’t finished in time. Luckily it’s still the same day, so hopefully nobody minds that badly.

 

Techniques

 

Miss All Sunday/Nico Robin: Eater of the ? ? no mi.

 

Whatever the Hell she used to disarm everyone (Makes sense when he fruit gets revealed in Alabasta)

 

However she blew Igaram to kingdom come (Seriously, how did she do that? Anyone who knows please tell me)

 

_Mr. 5_ Eater of the Bomu Bomu no mi/ Bomb Bomb fruit

 

**My Nose Fancy Cannon** : 5 flicks a piece of snot at his opponent, which explodes on contact thanks to his Devil Fruit

 

_Miss Valentine’s Day_ Eater of the Kilo Kilo no mi/ Kilo Kilo fruit (Don’t need a translator for that one)

 

**10,000 kilo press** : Valentine increases her weight to its highest level, and then tries to crush her enemy as she drops out of the sky.

 

_ Kaos _

 

**Traptrix: Game Over!** – The razor wire produced by Hebi’s **_Traptrix_** form shred its target in a inescapable curtain of death (I’ll admit it’s a Saw reference, just because it seemed like a good idea at the time)


	25. Little Garden... more like Jurassic Park

LW: Here we go, the Little Garden Arc and more canon divergence, yay!

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Little Garden… more like Jurassic Park

 

‘So what do you think the problem with Little Garden is? I mean Miss All Sunday says it neutralises the threat we pose to Crocodile’s plans so it must be bad’ Kaya asks the group, the trip from Whiskey Peak a lot calmer than the one to it.

 

‘Maybe it’s full of vicious monsters, or cannibalistic amazons’ Usopp panics, causing a shiver to shoot down the spines of half the crew… while Kaos hums and shrugs

 

‘That’s not it… well I suppose it could be, but when Robin gave us the Eternal Pose she said it was so we’d show up in time to do something, so I think the problem is something much simpler, but also outside out control. The Log Pose need time to adjust to each island’s magnetic signature and point to the next one, so what if the problem is it takes weeks or even months to record Little Garden’s?’ at the question Vivi pales

 

‘So he could destroy my kingdom and I’d be helpless to stop them?’ she whimpers

 

‘It’s just a theory, but we don’t know anything so it’s all we got’ the purplette backtracks, trying to appease the light blue haired princess. It wasn’t much but he had more things on his mind than Vivi’s feelings, like the 2 prescience’s that the ship had picked up in Whisky Peak, and were still nudging his sense. He just didn’t know if it meant they had a shadow or stowaways.

 

‘ _Not that it matters’_ the 1 st mate thinks _‘until we deal with Crocodile we’re going to have them and the other agents gunning for us’_

 

Those musings were interrupted by the appearance of a giant dolphin, spurring everyone to get their asses in gear, then the appearance of Little Garden on the horizon, which at least gave them a target.

 

The island at first glance appeared to be that of a thick rainforest, with little in the way of visible fauna due to all the trees along the edge of the river they used to enter the island proper. It didn’t last forever though as they caught sight of and were then sqiftly attacked by a large bird like creature which quickly flew away when it failed to capture any of them. Then there was the giant tiger which stalked the Merry for a spell before being attacked by a smaller but still large reptile which made swift work of it.

 

‘All in favour of staying put on the boat till the pose resets say I’ Usopp yells, getting immediate ‘ **I** ’s from Nami and Kaya just as the Merry stops, Zoro throwing out the anchor to keep her from floating away before they needed to go.

 

‘This place is… so cool!’ Luffy cheers, then quickly turns to his cook ‘Sanji, 2 pirate lunchboxes, I’m going exploring’

 

‘Can we come too Luffy?’ Vivi asks, surprising everyone, most of all Carue, who was a little annoyed she had been volunteered by her princess to go onto the dangerous island when she could just stay here and sleep

 

‘Okay’

 

Kaos pulls himself to his feet, brushing dust off his pants ‘Well I’ve got nothing better to do, I think I’ll tag along’

 

‘What? We’re stuck on a mysterious island of death…and you want to explore?’ Usopp yells

 

‘Yep’

‘Pretty much’

‘Quack’

‘Got it in one long nose’

 

‘Ahh, why would they do something this crazy? Plus Luffy and Kaos are some of our best fighters, but I guess as long as…’

 

‘I’m heading out too, need to replenish our food stores given these 2 endless stomachs’ Sanji says as he passes backpacks to **_Team Exploration_** , Luffy grinning unapologetically while Kaos smirks and makes a joke about being a growing lad.

 

‘If I find anything good should I bring it back?’ the reflect human asks

 

‘Nah, I’ll be fine, plus Zoro volunteered to assist’ the swordsman chuckles

 

‘Actually I said I could catch a bigger beast than you, then almost swallowed your cigarette at the speed you entered my personal space to tell me I was deluded’

 

‘Shut up marimo!’ Sanji growls, nearly head butting the teen

‘Make me swirly brow’

 

‘Bring me meat! Good luck guys’ Luffy orders then grinning widely as he hops off the ship, Vivi following on Carue and a still sniggering Kaos not far behind

 

‘We’re stuck on a dangerous island and they’ve left us alone and defenceless’ Usopp sobs, till Kaya taps his shoulder

 

‘Not all the hard hitters as gone, Alvida’s staying on the ship’ she says, trying to raise his spirits

 

‘She’s right; no way am I walking through the woods unless I need it. I’m using the free time for a little sunbathing but yeah I’ll lend a hand if there’s any threat to the ship’ the former captain says as she sets up a deck chair and pulls out a book

 

Nami nods ‘Yeah Usopp, we’ll be fine till at least Sanji and Zoro return with food’

 

The sniper nods and stands up ‘You’re right, there’s nothing to worry about I guess I was being silly’ the trio laugh until they hear a small thump. Turning they see Alvida passed out and lightly snoring, her book having slid off her smooth stomach and her hat having joined it on the floor.

 

‘Seriously? She’s asleep!’

‘No way, that’s faster than Zoro!’

‘Think she’s narcoleptic?’ Nami asks the remaining crew

 

Kaya shakes her head ‘No, we’d have noticed before now if she was. This is most likely her body reacting to the 1st proper chance to rest since we entered the Grand Line’ the ship doctor/gunslinger then gains a thoughtful look ‘I’m actually surprised she’s the only one: Zoro, Kaos and Luffy didn’t exactly get any sleep either and Vivi had to remain awake to spring that trap as Miss Wednesday. Add to that the stress of a death sentence over our heads, it’s quite exhausting’

 

 

_ With Team Explorers _

 

‘It’s a dinosaur!’ Luffy cheers, clapping his hands rapidly while Vivi, Carue and Kaos were shocked to silence, the tall 1st mate for once not having a comment yet.

 

When the shock finally waned he grinned widely, laughing and grabbed the rubber captain ‘You some know how to pick ‘em Lu Sesese’ Vivi noticing the brothers joyful expressions were nearly identical

 

‘ _They’re treating this like it’s a pleasure cruise. Are they stupid, insane or just that strong?_ ’ she wondered before getting a new reason to loose her mind.

 

‘I’m going to go ride it’ Luffy declares, shooting his arms up to grab the brachiosaurus by the top of its neck and springing up to land on its head. Kaos facepalms but chuckles while Vivi sits on Carue’s back, her jaw hitting the duck’s back while her eyes go pure white

 

‘That boy is going to get himself killed, or worse all of us killed’ the princess begins to panic until she feels Kaos’ bony fingers on her shoulder

 

‘Don’t worry about Luffy, sure he seems like a reckless idiot and sometimes that’s true, but he’s too stubborn to die’ the purplette explains, watching the straw hat captain bounce from one angry dinosaur to the other, not a care in the world. That was until one of them manages to swallow him, Kaos not needing to look to know Vivi was glaring at him, the word ‘ ** _See!_** ’ implied in her eyes

 

**CHOP**    **_YUG YUG YUG YUG_**

****

A massive sword slices through the dinosaurs neck, falling to the ground just in front of Kaos and Vivi with a loud crash. A moment later Luffy comes out the end, looking really confused

 

‘That was weird’ he says, mostly to himself, but the 3 others agreed whole heartedly ‘Hey, when’d he get here?’ Luffy asks, causing them to turn in the direction he was looking at which point Vivi’s heart decided to try escape out her mouth

 

Standing, watching them was a giant at least 12 metres tall, best described as being basically a Viking, down to the thick greying brown beard on his pointed face, nearly reaching his belt.

 

‘Yug yug yug. You little people are very brave and a lot of fun to watch you grapple the long necks’ the giant says with a huge smile

 

Now given they (being Luffy and Kaos) grew up in the East Blue, it had been quite a while since anyone called Kaos **_little_** , so his 1st reaction… was to laugh

 

‘Is he okay?’ the giant asks, Luffy waving his hand dismissively

 

‘He’ll be fine, it’s just he’s the tallest guy we’ve ever met before you. What’s your name by the way?’

 

The giant flexes his muscles before raising his sword into the air ‘I’m Dorry, greatest warrior in all of Elbaf and don’t let anyone tell you different’

 

‘That’s so cool! Wait, where’s Elbaf?’ Luffy asks

 

‘Elbaf is the home of the giants, on an island deep in the New World’ Dorry explains ‘Come eat with me new friends, we don’t get visitors to Little Garden’

 

The pirates put it to a vote, Luffy eagar for giant food, Kaos not having issues as Dorry seemed nice enough and Carue couldn’t vote, meaning Vivi was out numbered and followed the guys back to the giant’s lair.

 

_ Dorry’s home in the mountain _

 

‘FOOD!’

 

Luffy pounces like a wild animal, his rubber jaws enabling him to swallow the massive chunks he tears off. Kaos had to use one of Hebi’s larger forms to cut it due to the sheer size of the chunk of dinosaur meat in front of him, passing some to a reluctant Vivi before having his own, Carue was fine with the drink Sanji made her so simply sat beside the princess, ready for the 1st sign of danger, to run for her life.

 

‘Mr. Giant, it must be pretty lonely here on your own, why are you here by the way?’ Luffy asks curiously, the other 3 also interested

 

‘Yug yug yug. I’m not alone’ Dorry laughs

 

‘You’re not’

 

The giant shakes his head ‘Nope, there’s another giant on Little Garden, his name is Broggy. As for why we’re here, it’s to fight’

 

‘What?’ Vivi yells ‘Why?’

 

‘We’re not allowed fight in Elbaf, it angers our Gods, if 2 giants have a disagreement that can’t be settled any other way they are set away to another island and only 1 will leave, the victor decided by the will of the gods and granted their divine protection. We’ve been fighting for the last 100 years’

 

‘100 years! It must be really important to keep fighting for this long’

 

‘Actually, I’ve forgotten what we were fighting about, it’s been so long’ Dorry admits with a slight chuckle, causing Kaos and Luffy to laugh and Vivi to groan

 

‘If you can’t remember why you’re here then just stop and go home’

 

‘No, even if we don’t remember the reason the fact Broggy and I are even here proves how serious it must have been. Plus this is a sacred duel, to back out dishonours the Gods of Elbaf, as well as both our families’

 

‘But…’

 

‘Vivi’ the princess turns to the taller straw hat ‘This is clearly a wide cultural difference between you both but you should let him follow his traditions unhindered. I’m sure if I knew anything about Alabasta I’d be able to point out things I viewed as flaws in the traditions of the sand people as an outsider, I mean besides making Crocodile a Sir even you know that was a bad idea, but they won’t make you charge your mind or ways’ he smiles as the bluenette looks thoughtful, then winces at the light punch to the kidney Luffy gives him ‘Hey!’

 

‘That wasn’t nice calling Vivi a sand person’

 

‘Actually it’s fine, in the old tongue that’s the name of the island before the Nefetari family took over and named it Alabasta, ‘ **Sunagakure** ’ the people of the sand’ Vivi explains

 

‘Oh, okay then’

 

_ Back on the Merry _

 

‘G-G-G-GIANT!’ Usopp yells, as a large and rotund man with a bushy beard and wide grin crashes out of the forest.

 

‘Usopp stop yelling, holy shit, whoop’ Alvida groans before seeing the giant and slipping off the chair

 

‘Hi I’m Broggy, do you have any booze? I drank mine and people don’t come by very often so I hope you have some’ the giant booms

 

Usopp and the girls look to one another ‘The only thing we have big enough for him is the cleaning alcohol, but that’s not something that’s meant to be drunk’

 

‘Just give it to him, worst case he doesn’t like the taste’ Nami argues, wanting to make the giant go away as quickly as possible

 

Any arguments were cut off my Broggy’s loud yell, turning they see a T-Rex (to which they have the expected freak-out) had decided to chomp down on the giant’s butt, in response Broggy takes his axe off his belt an swings, removing the dinosaur’s head rather easily

 

‘Holy shit’

 

‘I’ll go get the alcohol just one moment’ Usopp yells, speeding into the bowels of the ship to retrieve it

 

‘Thanks, hey why don’t you come with me, let me feed you as thanks’ Broggy offers happily ‘I just caught dinner after all, so you know the meat will be fresh’ he grins as he holds the T-Rex head above him ‘Yababababa’

 

‘Oh we’d love to but…’

 

‘Yeah sure’

‘I got no problems’

 

‘WHAT!’ Nami screams at Kaya and Alivda, Usopp meanwhile stunned into silence

 

‘Broggy seems like a nice guy, it wouldn’t be polite to refuse’ Kaya explains

 

‘I’m just hungry and who knows when Sanji and Zoro will come back with food, this is my best chance to eat before nightfall’ Alvida answers bluntly

 

‘Yabababababa/ It’s settled, let’s go so I can feed my new friends, and get drunk for the first time in many years’ Broggy grins, placing his hand palm up on the deck of the ship

 

_ Later, at Broggy’s camp _

 

‘This is actually better than I expected’ Alvida says, Broggy smiling as she digs into the meat with a speed only beaten by their captain, the other slab shared by Kaya, Usopp and Nami, all a bit leery about the giant staring down at them, though Kaya was at least trying to eat enough to show she appreciated the meal

 

‘I agree, it turns out dinosaurs doesn’t taste like anything in the East Blue’ the blond responds to which the others nod

 

‘Hey Mr. Broggy Sir, how long does it take for the log to reset for this island?’ Nami asks, both to fill the dead air and find out how long they would need to remain on this death-trap

 

‘One full year’ the giant responds with his jolly tones, which made the statement even worse

 

‘FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!’ was the only thing going through Nami’s head before passing out, Usopp not far behind her but managing to somehow remain conscious, Kaya paled to a greenish grey while Alivda laughed thinking Kaos and Robin had been right, they were screwed not because of any nefarious plans, but because of the screwed up nature of the Grand Line itself

 

The volcano in the centre of the island began to rumble and explode, Broggy sits straighter and drops his meat before standing, Usopp shivers when he sees the steely gaze in his eyes ‘I’m sorry to leave you little ones, but there’s something I must attend to’ he booms, picking up his axe and shield before walking off, the 4 stand and move to watch whatever was important enough to make the happy go lucky giant act so serious.

 

Turns out the cause was another giant, the 2 running towards one another, shaking the ground as they go before colliding with a thud of their blades against the other’s shields.

 

‘I have forgotten the reason for our brawl!’ Dorry yells as he swings

 

‘As have I!’ Broggy responds, batting away the strike with his shield

 

‘But I will still be victorious!’ they both bellow, their very will felt wash across the island for a moment, that was the strength of their conviction.

 

TBC

 

LW: Giants are definitely not something to be trifled with in the OP universe, especially when you consider according to Oda, the minimum height for someone to be considered a true giant is 12m tall.

 

No lore, terms or other stuff this time, but there will be next time everyone, I grantee it

 

Miss Golden Week: Hi, did I come to the right place?

 

LW: Right place wrong week, but while you’re here…

 

Miss GoldenWeek: Lonly doesn’t own anything from One Piece other than Kaos, his associated bits and bobs (weapon, devil fruit etc) and OP versions of characters from other series, such as Captain Nylock Morgan and his crew to name but 3,


	26. Baroque Works rebellion, organised chaos

LW: Back to the island of giants and dinosaurs, here we go.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Baroque Works rebellion, organised chaos

 

It was strange but also impressive that even after a century of fighting those 2 could still lay into each other like they were in their prime, something which amazed, Kaos Luffy and surprisingly enough Usopp who couldn’t take his eyes off the 2 warriors deadly dance. Concluding in one final blow as the volcano sounded once more, both giants slamming their shields into the others face.

 

‘73,466 duel’ Dorry begins

 

’73,466 draws’ Broggy finishes as both keel over with a loud crash.

 

Yug yug yug yug

Yababababa

 

Interestingly enough it seemed the animosity the 2 giants had for one another was limited to their fights, as the 2 had no problem just lying there laughing to one another and talking civilly.

 

‘Hey Dorry, a couple of guests of mine gave me some alcohol, want some?’ Broggy asks

 

‘Drinks? That sounds great, after so long I’ll drink anything’ Dorry answered with another laugh

 

_ A little later, with Dorry _

 

‘Yug yug yug. So Broggy’s new friends are also part of your crew?’ Dorry asks, slowly draining his alcohol barrels

 

‘Yep, Usopp, Nami, Kaya and Alvida. Guess they got a little cabin fever too’ Kaos replies with his usual smirk, himself and Luffy still eating the giant’s dinosaur meat

 

‘Well if you’re all here together, I guess I can thank you for the refreshments as much as them and Broggy’

 

‘Dory, does it really take a year for the log to reset on Little Garden?’ Vivi asks, wanting there to be some kind of misunderstanding at play here

 

The giant nods ‘Yes. Didn’t you notice the mounds of human skeletons lying around here?’ he asks bluntly

 

‘Actually I think she’s been actively trying to ignore them’ Luffy teases, words muffled by his full mouth

 

‘Little Garden is hard to survive on for humans, some get eaten by dinosaurs, die of starvation, thirst of exposure, or even being stupid enough to attack myself or Broggy, doesn’t matter, point is they all die here’

 

Vivi starts to break down into tears ‘Even if we could somehow survive for a year, there’s no telling what Crocodile could have done in that timeframe, Alabasta might not even exist any more’ she blubs

 

‘True, plus some of us don’t exactly have that good attention spans, Kaos and me get bored easily. Is there any other way off this island Giant Guy?’

 

Dory sets down his barrel and sighs ‘There is an Eternal Pose, but it’s set to our homeland of Elbaf, you asked what we’re fighting for, if you want to be materialistic you could say the pose and the way home is our prize. You can try take it, if you think you can beat me and Broggy’

 

Luffy frowns ‘No, that won’t work, we need one either to the next island or Vivi’s island’

 

Dorry strokes his beard ‘You could try sailing around randomly, should hit an island eventually, if you’re lucky. That’s all you need really, any island for the log to register’

 

Luffy looks to be thinking before bursting out laughing ‘You’re right, we could get lucky shishishi’

 

You could. Hey, you okay Tiny Girth?’ Dory asks as Kaos silently pulls himself to his feet

 

The purplette nods ‘Yeah I’m good, just need a walk’ he replies with a wave of his hand and a smile, but only Luffy noticed it looked pinched

 

‘Okay then, don’t get dead Yug yug yug’ Dory yells as the tallest straw hat wanders into the jungle

 

Kaos groans once he felt he was far enough distance ‘ _This is not good, Bomberman and Instant Weight loss were bad enough but there’s another paramecia as well as what I suppose Luffy would call a mystery power, and I feel it… calling to me. What are you?_ ’ he thinks, his lips turning into a crooked grin when he feels the strange prescience on it’s own move away from the other agents, now was his chance

 

Following his senses to a clearing he found a girl in a sunhat drinking tea and munching on rice cakes. He must have made some noise because she turned and he saw her blank, young face and rosy cheeks

 

‘ _Damn, she’s just a kid, how’d she get mixed up in Baroque Works?_ ’ he thinks, a pang of sympathy hitting his heart, as she stands, twirling a paintbrush between her fingers

 

‘This is not good’ she says flatly, frowning

 

**Colour Trap: Laughter Yellow**

**Reflect Armour**

 

Kaos felt something pass through him and sighed in relief, glad his childhood had granted him quick reflexes. The girl looked confused, tilting her head before asking

 

‘You’re not laughing, You don’t even feel like laughing do you?’

 

Kaos grins ‘No more than usual’ he then frowns when he realises his legs feel like lead and his arms swayed uselessly ‘Hm, I may have stopped your attack, but I’m a little stuck’ he muses

 

The painter gasps then smiles widely ‘Really? Oh that would be so cool if I could get one of my colour traps to do it. But what to call it, Paralysing Purple? Freezing Fuchsia? Immobilising Indigo?’

 

Despite himself Kaos chuckles at her enthusiasm ‘You are an odd one, but such an interesting mind indeed’

 

The girl smiles at this ‘That’s what Mama says too, she taught me the odd ones are the best’

 

‘That they are kid, that they are. Hey what are you doing out here moping? Come on I’m basically a captive audience, you can tell me’ Kaos asks with a sincere smile, which appeared to work on the girl

 

‘I’m worried about mama, Crocodile isn’t a nice man, he’ll hurt her and I can’t do anything to help her. I know she can hold her own, mama is awesome, but Crocoman is so bad, she might die’

 

‘Hey kid…’

 

‘Goldenweek, or Artemis I suppose, but only mama calls me that’

 

‘Well Artemis, my Captain is going up against Crocodile and we’re going to win. I promise you I will bring her back to you safe and sound’ Kaos declares, surprised when a crying Goldenweek slams into him

 

‘Thank you Papa! I know Mama will be safe with you’ she mumbles, the purplette not sure how to process what just happened which was why he didn’t notice till he held her close that her missile impression had smudged her paint.

 

‘Yes she will, we look after out own. Nakama’ he grins and Artemis mirrors it ‘Now we just need to get off this island’ at that her face falls again ‘Hm?’

 

‘That’s why we’re here, me and Mr. 3. We’re supposed to take out the Straw Hats and report back. But you’re going to help mama. I don’t want to kill you and I don’t want to go back to Crocodile after failing’ she sniffles and bites her lips, then blinks when she feels Kaos hand rubbing her back

 

‘It’s fine, you won’t have to, I bet you’ll be an official Straw Hat once we get back to Luffy. Then you’ll have nothing to worry about’

 

Artemis sniffles ‘Really, you’d let me join, just like that?’

 

Kaos grins as he lets her stand ‘Yep, that’s how the others joined up, Luffy asked if they wanted to join and they eventually relented’ the girl chuckles and begins to follow him back

 

_ Meanwhile with Broggy _

 

With his axe handle broken, Broggy had to fix himself a new one ‘A brave warrior of the sea you say, what’s that?’

 

‘I want to be like you and Dorry’ Usopp explains

 

‘You want to be a giant?’ Broggy asks in confusion ‘Not sure there’s even a Devil Fruit for that’

 

‘That’s not what I meant!’ Usopp yells, meanwhile they girls all laugh at his expence ‘I want to be brave and strong like you and the other Warriors of Elbaf’

 

‘Oh’ Broggy nods in understanding, continuing to work on his axe ‘You know, even though our lifespans greatly exceed a human’s, we still think about how we’re going to die. We know everything we are and everything we make will fade to time, as it should, but if we die as a brave warrior, without compromising who we are, then we die with honour, and that would be an everlasting treasure. It something everyone in Elbaf wishes for’ he explains, Usopp hanging off his every word.

 

This lovely moment was ruined by 2 explosions, originating within the alcohol barrels. Broggy was more confused than anything while Dorry had already drunken the tainted barrel and it went off in his stomach, causing severe damage

 

‘Old Giant Guy! That was the same alcohol from the ship, why did it explode?’ Luffy wonders aloud as he and Vivi try to check on Dorry

 

‘Do you think the other giant could have tainted it?’ Vivi suggests only to be imidiaely smacked down yb Luffy

 

‘Were you not paying attention, these giants are honourable warriors, they would never approve of such tactics, they’d spit on you for even suggesting such a manouver’

 

‘Then who do you think did it?’

 

‘You stangers…’ the 2 look up and see Dorry had pulled himself to his feet, just barely, blood dripping from his mouth into his beard ‘…Broggy wouldn’t do something like this, he’s a warrior or Elbaf, he has his pride and honour. So who else is there to suspect… but you?’

 

‘Luffy we should go’ Vivi begins but is once more cut off

 

‘It won’t do much good, here hold this’ Luffy says seriously, passing his hat over to the confused bluenette

 

‘You’re going to fight Dorry?’

 

‘Don’t have much of a choice, man Kaos is going to be pisssssed he missed this’ he smirks for a second before turning serious once more ‘I don’t want to, but we need to settle this, so here I come Dorry!’

 

The giant swings his sword, clearly slower and more erratically than when they watched him fight Broggy a little while ago, but still very dangerous had Luffy not jumped out of the way. Luffy tries to use one of his Gum Gum attacks, but his body was bounced off the giant’s shield before he could even finish. Given the direct approach wasn’t going to work, Luffy reached out to the trees on the other side of the clearing, extending his arms to do so, letting it pull him towards it, overshoot and use the energy from the journey over to shoot right back, slamming Dorry squarely in the chest.

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

Dorry drops his sword and nearly falls over, but manages to hold himself up long enough to stomp Luffy into the earth, Vivi shrieks as she worries the captain to be dead

 

‘So, he ate one of the Devil Fruits’ Dorry mumbles , blood soaked his lips and the top of his beard at this point in time ‘I guess I underestimated him’ was his final words before finally keeling over with a loud thump.

 

‘Luffy!’ Vivi yells in happiness when she see’s the boy pull himself out of a Luffy shaped crater, inside a boot shaped crater ‘Are you alright?’

 

‘I’ll be fine, it’s him I’m worried about’ Luffy replies, pointing to the unconscious giant ‘How is he by the way’

 

‘He’ll be fine, you were right though, the fighting actually calmed him down somehow’

 

‘Happened a lot back home, sometimes you just NEED to fight as a way to let off steam, Mama Dadan used to do so a lot, not to me or my brothers but the other guys we lived with, her gang’ Luffy explains before standing up, his hat on his head and a frown on his face ‘I on the other hand am not so calm. Dorry is right, Broggy wouldn’t do something like this, there duels are important to them, to important to ruin by cheating like this. No, someone else is here and they ruined everything, spat in the face of these nice giants and their honour, their pride. Damn it Kaos you picked a shitty time to go for a stroll’

 

As the last 5 minutes haven’t been going their way the volcano sounded, alerting both giants to the next duel, to which Vivi and Luffy grimaced, knowing Dorry was definitely in no condition to fight another giant if the straw hat captain was able to take him down. But still they heard it, the old giant pulling himself first to his knees and then his feet, retrieving his sword on the way.

 

‘Stop this Dorry, you can’t fight Broggy in this condition!’ Vivi pleads but he ignores it

 

‘It doesn’t matter, this isn’t simply an attack humans, this is a sign from our Gods, Broggy has been blessed and now I must go’

 

‘What no! You can’t just give up like that!’

 

Dorry laughs, but it sounded pained ‘Yug yug yug, you really think I’d let Broggy win, I wouldn’t dishonour my friend by handing him victory, he still needs to work for it’ he then turns from the duo straining his muscles to lift the rock formation behind him… then dropping it on Luffy, pinning him to the ground

 

‘Hey, what the Hell? Let me go!’ Luffy yells as he squirms and flails

 

‘I’m sorry little friend, but I can’t allow you to stop me from continuing the duel. I am a warrior of Elbaf, that alone means I can’t run from a fight, if I did, I wouldn’t know who I was anymore. Goodbye’ he then begins to slowly plod out towards the clearing him and Broggy had fought the last time in, ignoring Luffy and Vivi’s attempts to get him to come back, or to free them.

 

‘He’s going to die’

 

‘It’s not right’ Luffy growls ‘Someone’s interfering, everything’s wrong. Dorry’s going to die and it’s not even his fault’ the rubber boy sighs ‘Vivi, take Carue and try get the giants’ attention, there’s nothing I can do until get free’

 

Vivi blinks before yelling ‘Luffy are you insane?’

 

‘Probably, but that’s not important right now, getting them to stop their duel is’

 

The princess sighs, seeing she wasn’t going to get through to Luffy so agreed, calling her duck before hopping onto her back ‘This is a bad idea Lu, I’m not going to be able to do this alone’

 

‘Then find the others’

 

Vivi sighs ‘Okay, you stay safe here alright?’

 

‘Not like I can go anywhere’ Luffy grumbles as Carue runs off. Luckily he wasn’t alone for long as Usopp came crashing through the forest, flying through the air and landing directly in front of him

 

‘LUFFY! That God I found you, a dinosaur ate the girls!’

 

‘What? Are you serious?’

 

‘Yeah, one moment we were all together and the next I was all alone, I got my crewmates and best friend killed’ Usopp falls to his knees and begins to wail

 

‘Hey Usopp!’ the long nose stops for a moment at the yell ‘You didn’t see them get eaten? Or hear a scream?’ the sniper shakes his head ‘Then they’re not dead, just lost’ Usopp perks up at this

 

‘So they’re alright?’

 

‘As long as they didn’t all get separated like you did they should be fine. I presume Kaya and Alvida brought their weapons even if Nami didn’t’

 

Usopp nods ‘Yeah, all the dinosaurs and other nasties, Kaya wouldn’t leave the ship without them’

 

‘Well, well, seems the giant may have just made our jobs easier’ 5 says with a smile while Valentines Day cackles, the 2 entering the pirate’s field of vision

 

‘It was you, you did this! Interfering with the duel, taking our friends, everything’ Luffy accuses, to which the agents smile just a little

 

‘Correct Straw Hat, seems you’re not a dumb as they claim you to be. Right now Mr. 3 is taking care of your friends, we can take our time with you’ she chuckles as 5 steps forward to deliver an explosive kick to Luffy’s face, throwing Usopp back with a **nose fancy cannon** when he reaches for his slingshot.

 

**BOOM**

 

‘Hm, you’re a lot sturdier than I expected’ 5 muses as a slightly blackened Luffy coughs up some soot and glares at him ‘But it just means I’ll have to be more forceful

 

**Colour Trap: Freezing Fuchsia**

 

The 2 agents seize up as a bright pink design appears on their backs, Kaos and Artemis appearing from the tree line moments later

 

‘Hey Captain, looks like you’re in a tight spot. Also look what I found; she’s followed me home can we keep her?’ Both Kaos and Goldenweek try the puppydog pout, the younger obviously better at it than the elder.

 

‘Sure, hey did she make them seize up like that?’

 

‘Yep’

 

‘Awesome! I always wanted an artist’

 

Kaos grins and turns to Artemis ‘See, what did I tell you, official Straw Hat’

 

‘Um Kaos… Luffy’s still stuck under a mountain!’ Usopp yells

 

Kaos sighs deeply ‘Don’t worry Usopp, I have this covered’ his fists and forearms turn silver, flashing in the strong sun of Little Garden, just before he began punching around Luffy, only taking about 5 or so hits to do noticeable damage to the wall, though continued until there were deep cracks radiating from around Luffy’s trapped form ‘There we go’ he says, smiling proudly, though frowns when he hears the agents chuckle ‘What?’

 

‘Doesn’t matter if you beat us, there’s still 6 more officer agents. And that’s not even including Mr. 0…’

 

Kaos waves them off ‘I don’t care what you have to say about Crocodile, we’re kicking his ass for Vivi and Artemis’ he says, his declaration getting an odd response from the duo

 

‘Crocodile’s Mr. 0?’

‘We’ve been working for that sell-out this whole time?’

 

Luffy looks confused ‘Sell out?’

 

‘Crocodile’s a Warlord, an attack dog for the World Government through the Marines, therefore a puppet of the World Nobles’ 5 explains bitterly ‘Alabasta, it’s the middle ground, the only group of Nobles that still live on the Line rather than their Ivory towers on the Red Line, in Mariejois’

 

‘That’s why you targeted it? Cause they’re World Nobles?’

 

‘Yes, or at least I thought we did’ 5 answers unable to nod

 

‘Yeah, they sit pretty while everyone suffers, they need to see the consequences of their ignorance’ Valentines Day adds

 

Kaos’ lip curls into a smirk ‘Luffy, go kick Mr. 3’s ass for interfering with the fight, I have an idea’ the 2 Baroque Work agents gulp

 

‘Still stuck here’ Luffy points out to which Kaos just waves him off

 

‘Just blow up, the wall should be weak enough now’

 

**Gum Gum Balloon**

 

Just as the other boy predicted, the wall had been weakened significantly enough that as Luffy inflated he caused the surrounding wall to give way and move out of his way. Luffy didn’t need to blow up to full size, just enough that when he deflated again he was able to crawl out

 

QUACK, quack, quack, quack

 

‘Carue!’ Luffy cheers, hugging the duck before a weight settles in his stomach ‘Carue, where’s Vivi?’ the duck droops, quacking sadly while waving her wings in the direction of where Dorry and Broggy were fighting

 

‘Like we said, Mr. 3 has captured the rest of your crew, and it seems the candle man has the princess too’ 5 says, much more neutrally than before

 

Luffy clenches his teeth as Usopp stands and walks over to him ‘Luffy?’

 

‘I’m going to kick his ass! Who’s with me?’

 

‘I will’ Usopp volunteers, wanting to help rescue his crewmates and follow his mentor Broggy’s example

 

‘Quack’ Carue responds, nodding her head. Vivi was her friend, she was going to help

 

‘Okay… Charge!!!!!’ Luffy screams, running in the direction Carue just came, the other 2 following just slightly slower

 

‘Your brother’s insane’ Valentine’s day comments

 

‘Oh that’s a given’ Kaos replies with a chuckle ‘Now, I believe we have a few things to discuss…’

 

_ A couple minutes later _

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

Mr. 3 turns and jumps out of the way just in time to avoid Luffy shooting past him, catching Broggy’s helmet on the way so he could stop

 

‘You ruined everything! I’m going to kick your ass!’ he yells at the agent who just smirks

 

‘Luffy!’ he turns and sees a giant cake/candle thing, stuck to the base were Vivi, Kaya, Zoro, Nami and Alvida (who looked to be spiked to the cake just like Broggy was to the ground).

 

‘Hey guys’ Luffy grins but recoils when they start yelling at him

 

‘Mr. 3’s trying to turn us into waxworks’

‘Break the tower and get us loose!’

 

Luffy nods ‘Got it, one wrecking crew coming up’

 

**Gum Gum…**

**Candle Wall**

**…Pistol**

 

Luffy goes for the direct approach as usual but 3 summoned wax from his arms, stopping it in it’s tracks, followed by more wax to restrain the boy, though it only caught one of his arms

 

‘Hey thanks, I needed something heavy and there weren’t any rocks around to toss’ Luffy says with a grin

 

‘What is this idiot going on about?’ 3 thinks then begins to panic when Luffy hops back onto Broggy’s head and throws his candle trapped arm behind them

 

**Gum Gum Sledgehammer**

 

**Bam!**

 

The pillar breaks, practically explodes actually and the candles and their stand fall, during this Luffy’s candle is shattered due to the impact. Unfortunately the section begins spinning again, faster than before

 

‘Hahaha, you really thought that it would be that easy? All you’ve done is sped up the process’ Mr. 3 laughs before sending out more wax to try ensnare Luffy

 

Luckily Luffy managed to hop his way out of the sticky wax’s path ‘We’ll see about that’ he growls, sending his arm back

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

… before slamming it directly into the Candle Man’s face, sending him flying into the forest

 

‘He took out Mr. 3 in one hit’ Vivi gasps

 

‘That’s all well and good, but we still need him to get us out of here before we all become waxworks’ Nami adds seriously

 

‘Take out the pumpkin head and then we can worry about getting free’ Alvida chimes in, looking to be getting twitchy without her mace around to try break them loose

 

‘Don’t worry guys. I’ve got this covered’ Luffy says with a grin, throwing his arm back, twisting it as he does

 

**Gum Gum Ri…**

 

‘Oh no you don’t!’

 

Luffy then takes a solid punch to the side, knocking him over and sending his attack off into the sky

 

‘Ow, what hit me?’ Luffy says, wincing as he stands

 

‘That would be me StrawHat’ 3 answers, now decked out in what looked to be mech armour

 

‘Wow, that’s so cool!’

 

‘I forgot I already painted that’ a female voice deadpans

 

3 turns ‘Ah there you are Miss Goldenweek, glad to see you’ve finally arrived and here I thought you’d gotten lost’ he says with a chuckle

 

Artemis shrugs ‘Nope, just had tea and crackers with this guy. He seems nice’ she smiles at the tall purplette, munching on a bag of crackers, looking at Mr. 3’s Candle Making Deathtrap with a look of quiet contemplation

 

‘Hm, did you say something? Here you go kiddo I have a weirdo to deal with’ Kaos says, passing the bag to Artemis who grins and digs in

 

‘Shishishi, you are definitely not Gramps’ Luffy chuckles

 

‘And why would I want to be that old grump anyway?’

 

‘Hm, so you’re another of Straw Hat’s crew? I must have missed you earlier’ Mr 3 says with a frown

 

Kaos smirks ‘I could feel the heat of your candle wax half way across the island. You never stood a chance. Also I’m not the only crewmate you missed…’

 

**Usopp sneak attack!**

Quack, Quack!

 

Mr. 3 back hands boy and duck into the cake with minimal effort on his part then turns his fists to Kaos

 

‘All I missed wasn’t worth making into statues, but I’m sure Mr. 0 will like proof you’re dead’

 

**Candle Trap**

**Mirror Wall**

 

Wax meets mirrors and luckily mirrors win, compressing 3’s wax back in on itself, so when Kaos releases his technique a hemisphere of semi solid wax drops to the ground

 

3 sneers ‘Well that didn’t work, I guess I’ll just have to pound you into the ground’

 

**Breeze Breath Bomb**

 

The explosion hits 3 in the chest, but his **Candle Champion** tanks it, meaning the agent was just annoyed

 

‘Mr. 5, how could you turn traitor after all this time?’

 

5 shrugs before blowing into his gun, reloading its volatile payload ‘You forget that while quite loyal to the cause, Baroque Works Agents are still mostly bounty hunters and mercenaries. Without giving away sensitive information, let’s just say Miss Valentine’s Day and I got a better offer’ he unloads into the candle man, but 3 blocks it with his armoured fist

 

‘Wait… Miss Valentine’s Day’s betraying us too?’

 

The lemon girl chooses this moment to join in the action ‘So what do we do now?’ Valentine’s Day asks as she drops down beside Usopp

 

‘I think I have a plan, but I have a question first. Mr. 3’s candle wax, while super strong, it’s still wax right?’

 

Valentine clicks her tongue before nodding ‘As far as I know yes, while stronger than the real thing, substances produced by Devil Fruits still retain most of their properties and behaviours. Why?’

 

‘Because my plan involves getting this rope lit’ he announces, holding the end of a length of rope

 

The lemon themed blond looks at him before shrugging and grabbing the end of rope ‘Oy lads, we need a light here’ she yells, waving the end of rope at them

 

Mr. 5 turns just after reloading ‘You got it then’ he says, aiming for the rope… (Which Valentina luckily held away from her)

 

**Breeze Breath Bomb**

 

… but is intercepted by Mr. 3 who blocks it with his candle armour

 

‘Did you really think that was going to work? Whatever idiotic scheme you have going on is no match for my superior intellect and battleizer. Those fools on the candle have another minute or 2 left to live, but you won’t even last that long

 

**Candle…**

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

Whatever 3 planned to do, it was interrupted by Luffy’s fist planting itself in his unprotected face (1st Pearl now Mr 3, why make so called invincible armour and not protect your face?) knocking the crazed artist onto his back

 

‘Done’

 

‘That didn’t help at all’ Usopp argues until Valentine puts her hand on his shoulder

 

‘Actually he did, Mr. 3’s candle fruit works in 2 ways, he can produce wax from his body and his hair functions as a wick, sustaining and producing fire. Sure it’s not as strong as the Mera Mera no mi, but it’s all he needs. We just need to cause his hair to light up and then we’re done and as he said we need to act quickly’

 

‘I got this’ Artemis announces placing her hand on the chest on the mech style suit.

 

**White Out**

 

The paint dribbles onto the ground like water, exposing the wax underneath

 

‘My turn’ Valentine says, getting a boost from Mr. 5 in order to jump into the air

 

**1kg bounce**

**500kg stomp**

 

Her attack shattered the wax suit and giving a glancing blow to his ribs (she’s trying to hurt him, not kill him after all). The agent’s eyes bulge and he screams in pain, hair erupting into flames and igniting the oil soaked rope Usopp had Carue wrap around the candle Death Trap

 

As Usopp predicted, 3’s wax, while stronger than steel, still maintained the properties of wax such as melting while under direct heat… or being on fire in this case. The statue began to drip, lost its shape before finally falling apart, freeing the trapped Straw Hats, Vivi as well as Broggy

 

‘Everyone’s free!’ Luffy cheers

 

‘And on fire’ Artemis points out, causing the remaining Straw hats & Carue to run over and assist putting their friends out

 

‘How’d we get stuck with these idiots Vic?’ Valentine’s Day asks off to the side

 

‘The tall one made a compelling case, plus Goldenweek is a good judge of character Val’ Mr 5 replies

 

‘Fair point’

 

‘YOU BASTARDS!’ Everyone turns to see a burning mad Mr. 3, his hair forming a burning 3 in his anger ‘You’ve destroyed my Magnum Opis, my Masterpiece. Oh you don’t deserve to become part of my art, you and the traitors can drown in my candle…’

 

‘Luffy’

 

‘On it’

 

**Gum Gum Bazooka!**

 

Luffy’s strike slammed into the remaining officer agent, sending him flying away with a twinkle

 

‘And we’re done’ Luffy sighs in relief, before flopping onto his back on the ground

 

‘Yababababa. Thank you humans, for saving me, and for showing a duel of this magnitude the honour and respect it deserves’ Broggy booms, then his smile falls as he turns to the prone form of his friend _‘Dorry, I’m sorry I didn’t beat you fairly, but you fought with honour as a warrior always should’_ he thinks, tears flowing freely… well until Dorry got up

 

‘Ow, who turned on the rain?’ the giant grumbles as he sits up, scaring the shit out of everyone

 

‘Dorry! You’re alive?’ Broggy asks, half happily half in confusion

 

‘I must have passed out or something. Guess you win this round. Hey all the humans are here too, did I miss something?’

 

‘Nothing much’ Luffy replies, causing the giant to shrug in an oh well kind of gesture

 

‘How are you still alive?’ Kaya asks

 

‘The Axe, it’s lost its edge. After all these years, it’s no longer strong enough to land a killing blow like that, I doubt my sword can do so either’ Dorry explains

 

‘Oh what a wonderful day, glad to have you back Dorry Yabababa’

 

‘You idiot, keep of my shoulder, you nearly cut it off Yug yug yug yug’

 

The giant’s reunion quickly devolved into lightly punching each other while laughting, enabling the humans to finally talk

 

‘So, we picked up some more strays?’ Zoro asks, referring mostly to Artemis sitting on Kaos’ lap, but also Mr.5 and Miss Valentine’s day standing behind him

 

‘Correct. Serpens offered us a tempory position on the ship in exchange for helping to deal with your croc problem’ Valentine’s Day answers

 

‘Is he allowed do that?’ Vivi asks Alvida who nods

 

‘He’s the first mate, if he does it in Luffy’s name and the captain doesn’t veto it he can basically do what he likes’ she responds, surprising Vivi by the level of control the elder straw hat technically had, even if it was subject to Luffy’s whims and final say.

 

‘Why should we believe you’re not going to stab us in the back the first chance you get?’ Nami asks suspiciously

 

5 shrugs ‘You may not trust us, but Crocodile is the one we’re gunning for right now, so for the moment our goals align. Afterwards, well we’ll see’

 

‘What’s your dream?’ Luffy asks, surprising the former agents

 

‘I…I want to build things, great things that can stand the test of time’ 5 answers honestly ‘Knowing how to break things, it helps me know how to make things stronger to withstand disasters and attack’ he adds

 

‘I want to be a great chocolatier’ Valentine answers

 

‘Sweet, an architect and a chocolatier. Join my crew! Oh and what about you painter girl, what’s your dream?’

 

Artemis stands a little straighter ‘I’m going to rescue Mama, then I’m going to become the greatest artist to ever live’

 

Luffy grins ‘Awesome. Now what do we call you guys, we can’t use your codenames, or else we’d have to still be calling Vivi Miss Wednesday’

 

5 sighs but nods ‘The names Victor’

 

Miss Valentine’s Day grins ‘And I’m Valentina… what?’

 

‘Your codename is your real name?’ Zoro asks with a paranoid look

 

‘Yeah so what? With Baroque Works anonymity policy the only person who would know is Victor if I so chose’ she yells defensively

 

‘I’m Artemis by the way’ the artist pipes in, trying to defuse the tension

 

‘So what now, stay on this island a year? Doesn’t sound like a great plan’ Alvida asks tiredly

 

‘No, there needs to be some other way to bypass it’ Vivi declares, clenching her fists and praying she was right

 

‘So this is where you all are’ a familiar voice says as a blond man exits the forest

 

‘Sanji!’

 

The cook smiles ‘Yep, it’s me. So what did I miss?’

 

‘Giants fighting, got some new crewmates and now we’re stuck waiting for the Pose to change’ Luffy answers, bypassing at least 80% of the events the cook had been absent from

 

‘The problem is it’ll take a year for the field to be recorded and we don’t have that long. We need to get to Alabasta now!’ Nami clarifies, wincing as she rubs her stomach.

 

‘Well if we can’t wait for the Log Pose, why don’t we just use this? Sanji asks, pulling out…

 

‘Is that an Eternal Pose to Alabasta?’ Vivi yells, grabbing the object to confirm that yes it was keyed to the magnetic field of her homeland

 

‘Where did you get this?’ Nami asks as Vivi passes it over, knowing the navigator would need it to get off Little Garden

 

‘Found it in a wax house, I also spoke to Mr. 0’

 

‘You exposed yourself! Crocodile didn’t know about you yet!’ Vivi yells fearfully

 

‘Fear not Vivi-chan, he thought I was Mr. 3 and I didn’t correct his assumption. The Pose was actually for him, Crocodile is calling in all his heavy hitters to Alabasta. His plan’s getting closer to completion’

 

‘Then we have no time to lose, Nami you can use that right?’ Luffy asks to which she nods

 

‘Yeah, this is all we’ll need till we finish dealing with Crocodile, then we can just switch back to the Log Pose, let it register Alabasta’s feild and continue on our journey’

 

‘Alrighty then, everyone back to the Merry, the Straw Hats are heading to Alabasta!’

 

_ A little while later _

 

‘Okay, that’s everything right?’ Luffy asks, getting nods from Nami and Kaos ‘Then lets go, onward to Vivi’s homeland, the island of Alabasta!’

 

Zoro and Victor pull up the anchor while Usopp and Valentina set down the sails, allowing the Merry to once again move now she has a destination. All was going well for about 10 minutes, they had almost lost sight of Little Garden… when they were attacked by a giant goldfish

 

‘Crap’

‘We’re all going to die!’

‘Here we go again Sesese’

_‘I will not die, I’m coming for you mama, Crocodile’_

‘Remember what the giants said, No matter what just go straight!’

‘Well it was fun while it lasted Kyahahaha!’

 

The Strawhats willing sailed into the Island Eater’s mouth, allowing it to devour the Going Merry… until it was caught in a psychedelic red and blue shockwave, shooting it straight through the fish and out the other side (not that way, more like a bullet). From the edge of Little Garden the giants watch their friends sail away, off on their own adventures. It was while reminising Dorry turned to his friend and former crewmate.

 

‘Hey Broggy’

‘Yes Dorry’

‘Think we should have told them about the only other person to leave before letting their log reset?’

‘Nah, he probably died before reaching the next island, it wasn’t worth getting their hopes up’

‘Yug yug yug, you’re right. I mean who’s even heard of Gol D. Roger anyway?’ the giants laugh knowing their friends had a job to do, once they reached Alabasta

 

TBC

 

LW: Well that’s Little Garden over and done with, and hello new crew mates. If anyone has problems with how Artemis acted, remember like Kaos said, she’s a very young child who’s a high ranked member of a crime syndicate, there has to be something wrong with her from living through that.

 

** Powers and weapons **

 

_Mr. 3_ Eater of the Doru Doru no mi / Candle Candle fruit

 

**Candle Trap** – Traps his enemy’s limbs in candle shaped restraints.

**Candle Wall** – Mr. 3 summons a wall of wax to defend himself from enemies. While strong, it can be broken with sufficient force, or being stuck with another Doru Doru no mi construct.

**Candle Champion** – 3 uses the freeform manipulation ability of his wax to form a battle armour around himself, using paint from Goldenweek to increase it’s defensive power.

**Giant Candle Service Set** – The death trap thing mentioned earlier, the top section spins, causing flakes of wax to fall onto the people trapped below, incasing them in the wax which hardens, killing them and turning them into wax statues.

 

 

_Miss Goldenweek/Artemis_ Not a Devil Fruit user

**_Colour Trap_** : In the anime and manga it’s described as some kind of hypnosis or something… I’m okay with just straight up calling it magic

 

**Laughter Yellow** – Those effected by this trap are supposed to be thrown into a fit of uncontrollable laughter

**Freezing Fuschia** – Those hit by her bright pink paint become unable to move the majority of their body, though can still do things such and breathing and speaking (thought that may have been Artemis’ choice)

 

**White Out** – Artemis can remove the effects of any of her paints by placing her hand on a target, casuing the paint to run, breaking its hold.

 

_ Victor _

 

Weapon: .44 cal. Flintlock revolver, South Blue manufacturer, with rapid fire capabilities

 

**Breeze Breath Bomb** – Firing his explosive breath from his revolver Victor is able to get much better distance as well as accuracy to his attacks and explosions.

 

_ Valentina _

 

**1kg bounce** – Lowering her body weight to 1kg Valentina is able to soar higher, it’s also a silent technique that enables her to float when paired with her umbrella

**500kg stomp** – Valentina increases her weight (often from 1kg) to 500 then lands feet first on her target, doing massive damage.

 

_ Luffy _

 

**Gum Gum Sledgehammer** – Basically a pistol with extra strength caused by the increased weight of Mr.3’s Candle Trap on the end of it.


	27. Nami's Sick: To the island of Snow and Ice

LW: Onto Drum Island… and I think after this arc I’ll be taking a break from OP. I’ve been doing this fortnightly for the past year, which is a lot for me so I’m thinking about stopping for a little while, then come back to it. Just a heads up, though it might not even happen so don’t worry too much about it yet.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Nami’s sick: To the island of Snow and Ice

 

The trip from Little Garden to Alabasta was another mostly smooth sailing trip, though ironically (given Alabasta was a desert island) the climate got colder as they went along. Things were going well until the ship lurched

 

‘Did we hit something? Usopp go check the lower deck, Kaos go check on Nami’ Luffy orders, the 2 guys nod and run off

 

Kaos enters the cabin to see Nami slumped against the steering paddle ‘Hey Nami, you okay?’ he asks, the ginger groans and pulls herself up

 

‘I’m fine, just tired I guess’ she grumbles, knees knocking as she tries to stand, only the purplette’s arms on her stopping her from hitting the floor

 

‘No you’re not, but even if you are you need to take a break, At least sit down before you burn out’ Kaos lightly orders, trying not to show his worry for the sarcastic bitch he still readily calls her friend

 

‘Shut up asshole, yer na the boss of me’ Nami groans, though her heart wasn’t in on it, sitting as he ordered and unfortunately for any argument she had passed out almost immediately onto the table.

 

_‘This is bad, really bad’_ Kaos thinks, deciding that whether or not it was the right thing to do or not, to let Nami sleep before getting Kaya to check on her.

 

_ A little later _

 

Nami groans as she comes to, her head was throbbing and while it took the edge off things she still felt run down and exhausted. It was then something really important slammed into the forefront of her mind

 

‘THE SHIP!’ she yells, jumping up (and instantly regretting it) but was surprising when instead of the mayhem leaving the wheel unattended should cause, instead there was gentle whistling as Kaos kept their heading matching the Eternal Pose, though he stopped and turned in response to the red head’s outburst.

 

‘Hey Nami, did the break help?’ he asks, stepping aside when she walks over to the bar and Pose, which still pointed to the Merry’s figurehead

 

‘You, you’re steering the Merry?’

 

‘Sesese, of course I am, who did you expect me to let do so, Luffy? Zoro? I may not be anywhere near your level in terms of navigational skill, but I’m Nami tier, which for the record is just below God, compared to those 2 idiots’ he smiles and Nami giggles

 

‘Are you calling me a goddess?’ Nami purrs, though whether her eye flutter was intentional or due to her fatigue h wasn’t sure

 

Kaos smiles, making a scale motion with his hands ‘Almost, demi-god more so’

 

Nami smirks ‘Good enough’ she then sighs as she sits back down ‘By me, my head is killing me’ she whines and Kaos’ eyes widen

 

‘Nami, what happened to your stomach?’ he asks and the red head looks down, seeing the edge of a purple splodge peeking out from under her shirt ‘I’ll go get Kaya, that could be bad’ he then leaves as quickly as he could, leaving Nami to groan and stare up at the ceiling.

 

‘Hurry back’ she whispers, shutting her eyes

 

With the Merry now helmed by Valentina, also not at Nami’s level but better than Kaos, Kaya was free to examine Nami, with Kaos assistance and Luffy’s concerned pacing. Once she was done the others were called in

 

‘I don’t know what’s wrong with her, she has a blisteringly high fever and clearly she’s running low on energy. I can try to treat the symptoms but not the cause, unless we figure out what she has. All I know is it had to have happened while in Little Garden, anyone know anything about the island?’

 

The former Baroque Works agents shrug ‘Don’t know anything, it as our 1st time there same as you’

‘Yeah, we get Eternal Pose via the Unluckies for each job, just like the one to Alabasta we’re currently using’

 

Kaya sighs ‘So we have nothing useful?’

 

‘Only that it was a bug bite, based on the welt it caused. Does that help?’ Artemis asks

 

‘It does a little, but only in knowing we don’t have too much time, even in the East Blue insect carrier diseases were bad, to say the least’

 

‘This ship really needs a qualified doctor’ Valentina mutters, getting lightly tapped on the head by Alvida

 

‘We know that, but now’s not the best time to be pointing out the obvious’ she growls, causing the blond to gulp before returning to her helmsman duties.

 

‘I’ll put her somewhere comfortable, if there’s nothing else we can do at the moment’ Kaos says, picking her up

 

‘Taking me to bed already handsome? I’m afraid I won’t be as impressive as you give me credit for at the moment’ Nami purrs, nuzzling into his neck. Most of the crew thought Kaos was pale already, but he turned the shade of Mr.3’s wax while Luffy laughs his ass off

 

‘LUFFY!!!!!! We need to do something quick, Nami’s become delusional’ he yells, his outburst also causing Kaya to chuckle and Nami to burrow her warm nose into the cold skin of his neck/shoulder joint.

 

_ Couple hours later _

 

With the exception of a large cyclone the crew just barely managed to avoid, Valentina managed to keep them on a direct and even course, right until they found something strange…

 

‘Guys, there’s a weirdo standing on the water’ Artemis calls from the Crow’s Nest

 

‘What are you talking about, that’s insane’ Usopp yells back up

 

‘Then look’ the artist responds, pointing directly infront of them, where yes, there was a man in jester like attire and a bow and arrows standing on the water

 

‘Just what we need, more stupid shit’ Vivi whispers, thought clearly not quietly enough when she sees both Kaos and Zoro smirk beside her

 

‘Think he’s a doctor?’ Luffy asks, only for Kaya to hit him, mostly because Nami wasn’t conscious enough to do so herself

 

The confusion lasts for several minutes, at which point a MASSIVE ship rises from the ocean, tossing the Merry back in it’s wake as everyone held to anything nearby to steady themselves. When the ship was steady they saw the figurehead was that of a retarded hippo, with the jolly roger being a skull with a crown and it’s tongue caught between it’s jaws. So yeah they just found their first Grand Line pirates.

 

‘Don’t tell me my raid ship took you by surprise, did it?’ a fat, grumpy looking old man says, between munching his way through a slab of meat, and the knife it was attached to, his men surrounding the members of the crew on deck at the time

 

‘So what I miss?’ Sanji asks, having come out just as Wapol’s men comondeared the ship

 

‘Nothing much, just some weirdo trying to steal from us’ Kaos answers, looking unimpressed by the rifle pointed at his face

 

‘You think yer pirates ay? With a crew of 7 you’ll never get anywhere’ Wapol laughs before throwing the sword in his mouth and chewing it up ‘Now, I’m looking to get to Drum Kingdom, any of you have an Eternal Pose or even a Log Pose to that region?’

 

‘Nope’

‘Never heard of it’

‘Is the island shaped like a drum? Ow’ Luffy whines as Kaya pulls Nami duty and hits him

 

Wapol frowns ‘Well that’s a shame, but what can you do. I guess we’ll just have to settle for your treasure… and your ship’ the man grins widely, before opening his jaws to unimaginable size and chomping through one of the side panels of the starboard decking

 

‘Hey, you can’t just eat our ship!’ Luffy yells

 

‘Quiet you, Wapol doesn’t like to be disturbed while eating’ one of the men orders, but Luffy ignored him and punches him into the ground, setting off the rest of the men on board to begin opening fire, as well as alerting the other straw hats below deck.

 

Usopp predictably tried to avoid most of the fighting, while Luffy tossed Wapol’s goons around like the cannon fodder they were, Sanji kicked them from one side of the ship to the other, Zoro’s swords proved to be too much for the idiots, and even Kaya managed to show them why they shouldn’t try taking her ship. The soldiers tried to get help from their captain, but he ignored them in favour of eating more of the ship

 

‘This is our home, not a buffet!’

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

**Bomberman kick**

 

Luffy’s pistol caused him to tear out the section of the ship he’d been chewing on, separating him from the main structure, so when Vincent’s kick hit him directly in the face… well the shockwave sent him flying far enough all that remained was a twinkle in the sky

 

‘Wapol?’ Squeaked one of his lieutenants

 

‘They sent him flying, and with his Devil Fruit he’s gonna drown!’ The other yells

 

‘Recall the troops, we have to rescue Wapol before he sinks to the bottom!’ as he commands the Hippo opens it’s mouth and a ladder extends, which Wapol’s men gladly took to retreat, swearing revenge as they sank beneath the waves.

 

‘Well…. That happened’ Vivi says to herself, before deciding she preferred it indoors with Nami, where things made sense.

 

After another day of Grand Line waters they reached a point where things were strangely calm and peaceful, something which Vivi says was proof they were nearing an island, a statement Artemis confirmed a few minutes later

 

‘Land a hoy’ she calls down, smiling widely

 

‘There has to be a doctor down over there’ Luffy cheers ‘Na… Valentine, head straight for that island’

 

‘You got it Luffy’

 

When they reached the island all they could see at first was snow, winter follage and oddly shaped mountains, but they continued going inland until they reached a stream, where there was land close enough to the ship they could safely disembark. Tossing the anchor over Zoro calls out ‘Okay we’ve arrived, who’s joining in the Doctor search?’

 

‘I am’

‘And me’

‘We need all the help we can get’

‘I… will be staying here good luck’

 

‘You’re not going anywhere pirates’ Everyone tenses at the unfamiliar voice, only the realising they were surrounded on the land by an angry mob

 

‘Shit, that was fast even for us’ Sanji groans

 

‘Think they’re the welcoming committee?’ Luffy asks, getting slapped by Alvida and Vivi

 

‘We don’t want your kind here’

 

‘Geez, what a bunch of dick’

 

‘Please, we just need a doctor, our friend is sick and we need medical attention’ Vivi pleads, to whch some of the mob scoff

 

‘You think we’re that stupid to fall for that trick?’

 

‘Raise anchor or we’ll blow you and your ship out of the water’

 

‘No, you need to understand…’

 

‘That’s enough Vivi’ Kaos says, stepping around and in front of the bluenette ‘Now to condense everything my friend was saying into a couple sentences: You can either let us get to your doctor and have her treat our navigator, then we can we on our way. Or you can fight us, we kick your asses, your doctor treats Nami, and while they treat you guys we leave never to return’

 

**_BANG_ **

**Prism**

‘Ahh!’

 

‘Sven!’ Dalton yells as the redirected bullet hits the other man in the shoulder

 

‘Well I didn’t expect you to actually shoot us, still that’s the point of calling someone’s blu…’

 

**BANG**

 

‘Son of a bitch!’ Kaos hisses when Dalton shoots him in the leg, followed by himself and Vivi getting slapped in the back of the head ‘Hey?!’

 

‘Idiots!’ Luffy shouts at the 2 ‘Why did you stand in front of me? Bullets don’t work on me, why did you get in the way?’

 

‘I was trying to deal with the situation peacefully…’ Vivi begins

 

‘Which almost never works’ Luffy interrupts ‘is that the end goal for this journey, do you want us to talk Crocodile down? Oh Mr. Crocodile, stop fucking up Vivi’s kingdom… oh you don’t want to, well thanks anyway. We could do that you know, after all Alabasta isn’t really our problem, or it is simply because it’s yours princess’

 

‘Wait, are you Princess Nefetari Vivi of Alabasta’ Dalton asks, to which Vivi nods ‘then why are you on a ship with these ruffians?’

 

‘Free transport’ Zoro answers ‘Vivi asked us to give her a ride home; we’d be almost there except the witch got sick. She’s our navigator so we’re kind of stuck without her, thought don’t let her know I said that’

 

Dalton frowns then sighs ‘Fine, I’ll show you to our village’ he then turns and the other let them pass

 

_ At the village _

 

‘So where’s the Doctor?’ Luffy asks ‘Apparently you guys are famous for them, or at least Vivi says you are if we’re where she thinks we are’

 

Dalton frowns ‘We were, but they’re all gone now’

 

‘WHAT!’

 

‘A while back our island was attacked by an extremely dark, powerful and vicious pirate, called himself Blackbeard, it’s why we acted so harshly when you arrived. When that man attacked us, our previous ruler, King Wapol fled, taking the Isshi 20, all our best doctors with him, leaving us to that monster’s wrath. All we have left is Dr. Kureha, the old witch and her monster, who took up residence in Wapol’s old castle’

 

‘Well, guess that’s where we’re going’

 

‘No, you’re staying here’ Luffy orders

 

‘Why?’

 

The captain sighs ‘Kaya just took a bullet out of your thigh, you’re not in the best shape to go mountain climbing. Besides…’ at this Luffy grins ‘…who else could I leave in charge of these so called ruffians in my steed? Usopp?’

 

‘Hey! I’d make a great captain’ Usopp argues to the brother’s amusement

 

Kaos sighs but nods ‘Okay, but Sanji’s going with you, you can’t heft Nami up a mountain by yourself’

 

The cook nods ‘I was about to volunteer myself, I’ll carry Nami, you make sure nothing stops us. You got that?’ Sanji then picks up Nami, nearly swooning when she nuzzles into his shoulder

 

‘Let’s go, the quicker we do this the better chance Nami has. Onward to the castle!’ Luffy screeches as he runs off, Sanji groans but follows the eccentric moron that was his captain.

 

_ A little later _

 

Vivi approaches the 1st mate, a silent tension between them after what happened on the ship ‘Dalton says Kureha comes down from the castle every now and then to check on the villages of the Drum Kingdom, if we catch her we can at least give her a heads up on Nami’s condition, as well as send her on her way’ the bluenette explains

 

Kaos nods ‘Good idea, lets round up the others and find us an old bat’ he pulls himself to his feet, to Vivi’s panic

 

Whoa, whoa, whoa, you’re still injured, you can’t just go walking through the snow’

 

‘Sesese. Don’t worry princess, one of the benefits of my fruit is that if used correctly, it can function as a form of healing factor. I’ll be good as new before we see Nami next’

 

Vivi eyes him sceptically ‘If that’s true, why’d Luffy bench you, specifically telling you that you couldn’t go with him?’

 

Kaos flashes her a toothy grin ‘Because Luffy understands that healed doesn’t mean 100%. I’m not to over exert myself till the next island, which if we don’t have any more interruptions, will be Alabasta’

 

Despite everything Vivi smiles, they were on the last leg of their journey, they were so close to her homeland, and soon they’d take the fight to Crocodile directly.

 

TBC

 

LW: Well that happened. Also yes, I did remove Vivi telling Luffy he’s an unfit captain and that we can’t solve all our problem by hitting things, because that is precisely how they solve all their problems in this show and it works. You don’t like Luffy’s methods you can make your own way to Alabasta princess.


	28. 28 Witch and Monster

LW: So here we are, the first appearance of the cutest character in OP, the one, the only Tony Tony _‘Cotton Candy’_ Chopper! It’s not much, but it’s the start of something beautiful (I guess spoilers for anyone who’s reading this without having read the manga or watched this far into the anime, everyone else you know exactly what I’m talking about)

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – The witch and the monster

 

Lapins; a vicious, carnivorous rabbit creature. The small ones are about the size of a large rabbit and are really more annoying than an actual threat. The problem is those are baby lapins, the adults are about the size of polar bears and even more aggressive. It was a pack of them that Luffy and Sanji end up walking into, clearly annoyed they booted its kid half way up a mountain for being an annoying little shit.

 

As he was holding Nami, even though his feet were his weapons rather than his hands Sanji wasn’t going to risk her getting hurt from the backlash of one of his kicks, meaning he was just dodging the animals. The good news was this meant Luffy was in his element, bouncing around like a loon, punching and kicking Lapins around the side of the mountain like they were just regular bunnies, he’d probably be enjoying himself if his friend’s life wasn’t in danger.

 

One thing they learnt was Lapins are a squishy as bunnies looked, enabling both pirates to use them as a leg up on the hike, well more a bounce up but same difference, as expected that just pissed them off more. It was at this point the Lapins revealed they had some form of intelligence as after they skirted around/ahead of the pirates began jumping up and down, sending out shockwaves which travelled through the mountain, setting off a huge avalanche.

 

As they flailed around trying avoid being crushed under the falling snow Luffy managed to get them all onto a tree sliding down the mountain, with the gang riding it like a sled

 

‘Well we’re not dead, but this is the exact opposite of where we need to be, we were almost at the top, so close to the doctor and now it’s slipping from our grasp’ Sanji loudly complains, gritting his teeth ‘It’s those damn bunnies fault, if they hadn’t started the avalanche we could be there by now and Nami would be okay, when I see them next…’

 

‘There they are’ Luffy interrupts to alert Sanji to something important… snowboarding Lapins. This was a pain to deal with as they kept leaping at the trio with claws extended or jaws open ready to chomp down on their heads, but with Luffy and Sanji’s strength as well as luck they were able to avoid damage until they reached a more immediate problem

 

‘Rock!!!’ Luffy yells as he saw their tree was on a collision course for a large boulder which unlike everything else was parting the snow rather than being buried under it

 

‘You can’t hit that, if you do we’re all going to die!’

 

‘What does it look like I’m doing’ Luffy fired back but he just couldn’t change the course, especially not with the Lapin’s boxing them in. Finally a minute before collision Sanji made a decision

 

‘Get her to safety’ he says to Luffy, just before passing him Nami and throwing them backwards, saving them from the collision which he and the lapins were injured by.

 

‘Sanji!’ Luffy yells, grabbing the rock with one hand, and after coiling his other around himself and Nami, shot it out trying to save his friend but unable to find him.

 

When things began to settle, Luffy lay Nami on the only bit of solid land he could see, wrapping her in his coat before hopping down to look for Sanji. On the way he found the baby lapin, fruitlessly using its tiny paws to try dig out one of the adults, and he felt bad for the vicious little furball so he yanked the adult out of the snow and continued his journey, now with both of his companions on his back.

 

Despite everything, including nearly dying himself and a momentary run in with Wapol and his goons, Luffy managed to haul both Nami and Sanji’s mostly unresponsive bodies up to the entrance of the castle before promptly collapsing, luckily it didn’t take long for them to be noticed

 

‘Idiot boy’ hissed a woman with the body of someone in their 30’s, and the face of someone in their 90’s, before turning to the still open door ‘Chopper, this one has clear signs of frostbite and hypothermia, prepare treatment…’ she stops when Luffy grabs her arm

 

‘Save my friends’ he chokes out ‘Don’t worry about me, Nami’s very sick and Sanji’s most likely severely injured, help them first’ the determination held in his eyes until Kureha nods, at which point Luffy smiles weakly and passes out.

 

_ Later _

 

Nami groans as she opens her eyes, still rather weak but noticeably better. She smiles and turns her head, causing her eyes to widen at the sight before her: a small, bipedal furry creature with a cute button nose and adorable pink hat.

 

‘ _Is that some kind of reindeer?_ ’ she thinks, seeing the antlers peek out of the hat, as well as the hoofs at the end of each visible limb ‘Hello’ she croaks, causing the creature to turn, pale and then run out of the room and crouching in the doorframe, though not before knocking over everything in it’s path along the way

 

The creature was clearly trying to hide, though was doing a poor job as only around half his face and even less than that of his body was actually hidden by the doorframe.

 

‘I think you’ve got it backwards’ she comments ‘The hiding thing I mean’ the creature freezes for a moment before slowly shuffling it’s way sideways, until only a single eye and the edge of his hat were visible ‘Now you’ve got it, though it’s too little too late as I know you’re there…’

 

‘Shut up lady!’ the furry yells ‘also can you tell me how you’re fever’s doing’

 

Nami gasps ‘It talks’ which causes the furball to jump back, crash into several objects and cause a general ruckus out of sight of the really confused navigator.

 

‘Keep it down Chopper’ a woman shouts, before stepping out of the smoke ‘Well it seems your fever is down. Tell me, are you happy?’ she asks Nami, swigging from a bottle of rum (are we sure she’s not a pirate?)

 

‘Who are you?’ Nami asks before the woman puts her finger to her forehead

 

‘Hm it’s gone down a couple degrees. I’m the only doctor on this island, Dr Kureha, or you can call me Doctorine’

 

‘Um, okay. Hey there were 2 others with me…’

 

‘They’re asleep in the other room. Real tough guys for managing to even get up here the way they did, you must be real special to them’ Kureha answers before she can even finish the question, then pushed up her shirt ‘See this, it’s why you were sick’

 

‘Yeah, I think Kaya said it was a bug bite of some sort, but she wasn’t able to do anything to help me’ Nami says sadly

 

‘Good girl, she’s right you were bitten by a Kestia, a tic with a wicked bite. The bacteria are mostly dormant for 5 days, though it does cause pain, swelling, fever and a whole host of other unpleasant symptoms. Based on the affected area I’d say you had been infected for about 3 days, so it’s a good thing you got here so quickly. Though the pain would have gone away in about 2 days without treatment’

 

Nami blinks and tilts her head ‘The pain would have stopped?’

 

‘Sure, cause you’d have been dead, the disease is known as the 5 day fever for a reason after all’ Kureha answers bluntly, causing Nami to pale significantly. ‘You know you’re very lucky’ the doctor notes

 

Nami looks confused ‘Why?’

 

‘The disease you contracted, or more specifically the Kestia tic that spreads it has been practically eradicated with the exception of a handful of prehistoric and desert islands. If I didn’t have some of the antibiotics on hand you would have died before I had time to make more of it’ Nami gulps ‘seriously, why were you walking around on a prehistoric island in a bikini?’

 

Nami splutters ‘It’s a long story’

 

‘A young one like myself has the time, and so do you as there’ll be another 3 days of treatment until I can allow you to leave’

 

Nami’s eyes bulged ‘3 days? But we need to have Vivi in Alabasta yesturday’ she moves to sit up, but Kureha shoves her back down and the navigator feels a scalpel against her throat

 

‘Listen here girlie, you can either lie down and get better or get up and die, and if you chose that option I might as well save you the pain and kill you now. Understand?’ Nami nods slightly at which point Kureha releases her. A moment later loud crashes and bangs can be heard within the castle.

 

‘What’s that?’

 

‘Kureha chuckles ‘Your friends must have finally met Chopper and as would be expected, are causing trouble’

 

‘Who’s Chopper, the little tanuki guy?’

 

Tony Tony Chopper is my son, well adopted as he’s a reindeer, but that doesn’t change much. He’s also one of the best doctors this island has ever housed, thanks to me of course, as well as the man who made me take him in, Dr. Hireluck, one of only a handful of people on this island I ever respected. Your friends will be fine, a little battered and bruised, but Chopper will have them patched up in no time at all’

 

‘Okay but what is he?’

 

‘Just a reindeer with a blue nose. Oh and he ate the Hito-Hito no mi, so he’s a reindeer human. Now get some rest kid, there’s nothing more you can do’

 

Nami nods before closing her eyes, deciding to take advantage of this chance for a little shut eye. She knew things would get messy very soon, just from being on Luffy’s crew for this long.

 

 

_ At Ground level, a while ago _

 

‘Are you sure this is the way to Cocoa Weed?’ Kaos asks as they trek through the snow

 

‘These are the directions Dalton gave me, which is the best we can do’ Vivi replies, wishing she hadn’t left Carue in Big Horn but not wanting to inflict too much of the cold on her companion ‘Good thing the village is so close, or we’d never get there in time’

 

They didn’t

 

‘ **Mother fucker!** ’ Vivi yells kicking the wall… and instantly regretting it. Kaos, Victor and Kaya staying what they believe to be a safe distance away from the angry princess.

 

‘This is not good, we missed the crazy old bag by minutes from what these people are saying’ Victor sighs while Kaya checks on the kid the Dr had treated, the boy happy to let her do so.

 

‘Hopefully we can find a lead, get her to calm down and stop swearing in front of kids’ Kaos mumbles

 

‘Um, I heard her say she was heading to Gyasta next’

 

The pirates perk up ‘Really, where’s that?’

 

‘Well you head east towards Big Horn, then keep going for another half hour’ that didn’t help very much

 

‘So what you’re saying is we should have stayed in Big Horn’ Vivi grumbles the other nod and begin turning back, Kaos tossing the princess over his shoulder much to her annoyance, but it did speed them up a little. They managed to arrive in Big Horn a little behind Wapol’s thugs, though from the opposite direction, just after Dalton attacked Wapol. It was then the strength and power of the Ishi 20 was shown, fixing up Wapol in a matter of moments to the point he was once more up and laughing

 

‘Damn, that could have made things a lot easier’ Usopp grumbles, then jumps when the 4 show up behind them

 

‘Hey Usopp, what we miss?’

 

‘That fat guy Luffy and Victor took out that tried eat our ship, he’s landed on the island and is now eating the village. Dalton just tried cut him in half but he got put back together again’

 

‘Shit’

 

It was at this moment that Wapol noticed them, and steam puffed from his ears ‘So you did have a Pose to Drum Kingdom, lying to your King is Treason, trying to stop me retaking my rightful place on the throne makes it Double-Treason. Once I reclaim my castle from that old bat, you weaklings will be my first royal executions of the year’

 

Kaos sighs as Vivi clenches her fists ‘1st We’re not citizens of Drum Kingdom, therefore you’re not our King, fuck, I don’t even know who was the king of my former homeland. 2nd We don’t have a pose to this island, how were we supposed to know it was almost directly between Little Garden and Alabasta, which was our actual destination? And 3rd, you still need to reclaim your throne and the castle from Dr. Kureha before getting to us by your own words’

 

Wapol growls and grinds his teeth ‘Men, slaughter these pirate scum!’ he orders, his cannon fodder soldiers charging the straw hats in basically a straight line

 

**Double Nose Fancy Cannon**

**Special Attack: Tabasco Star Barrage**

**Crescent Wave**

**Peacock Slashers**

**Oni Giri**

 

Did they expect anything else, really? Also just for the record, Kaya and Alvida were also attacking, it’s just they don’t have named techniques at the moment. Valentina on the other hand has to play more tactically as her fruit can leave her vulnerable when she changes weights so can’t just drop into the middle of a fight.

 

One revelation that occurred during this battle was when Dalton shifted into a Minotaur like form and started tearing through Wapol’s men with his spade.

 

‘So he ate a Zoan Devil fruit eh’ Victor comments

 

‘Quick a rare treat in Paradise, especially given he’s lived in Drum his whole life’ Valentine adds

 

‘What the hell is that?’ Zoro asks as he avoids more idiots shooting at him

 

‘Zoan type Devil fruits allow their users to transform into animals, as well as a hybrid form like the one Dalton’s in right now. He must have eaten the Ushi Ushi no mi given his appearance’

 

‘Correct’ Dalton answers them, surprising a few Straw Hats ‘I ate the Ushi Ushi model Bison. Now if you’ll excuse me you’re getting in the way of me killing Wapol’ he then leaps at the metal man once more only to be shot by Chess

 

‘You are naïve Dalton, as well as foolish. You got a lucky shot at your king, we won’t let that happen again’ Kuromarimo taunts

 

‘You’re weak Dalton, we’re going to tear that bleeding heart of yours straight from your chest’ Chess adds, then shrieks and drops his arrows from a shot to the hand

 

‘Get away from him!’ Kaya yells, aiming her ocelots at the men, Usopp moving to support her

 

‘You really think you stand a chance girlie?’ Kuromarimo laughs before having to dodge two slashes, one from Zoro and the other from Kaos ‘Now who’s the sneaks? Take this!’

 

**Marimo’s static cling**

 

Kaos looks confused when KuroMarimo rips off one of his afros and throws it at him, until it sticks to his hand even when he tries to use his reflect powers, which more annoyed him than anything else, though ducking under a flaming arrow was unexpected.

 

‘Papa’ Kaos looks over and sees Artemis poking his ribs ‘I have an idea, bring the hairball down here and hold it still’ he shrugs but does so, holding his hand to the artist

 

**Colour Trap: Laughter Yellow**

 

‘Tada!’ Artemis grins ‘Now we’re both artists’

 

Kaos sweat drops ‘I don’t think that’s how it works’ he replies

 

Artemis puffs her cheeks, reminding him of how young she is, then gives him an unimpressed look he presumes she copied from her _Mama_ before pointing into the group ‘Just hit the guy with the stupid face’ she orders, causing a few people to smirk and one guy to get offended

 

‘Hey!’ Chess yells loudly ‘My face is not stupid!’

 

‘Yes it is’ Artemis replies

‘No it isn’t’

‘Yes it is’

‘No it isn’t’

‘Is’

‘Isn’t’

‘Is’

‘Isn’t’

 

**Bam!**

 

‘Perfect 10’ Zoro jokes as the archer is knocked to the ground ‘What you think?’

 

‘Sounds about right’ Kaya agrees while reloading

 

‘Ah I’d give it a 7, he could have sent him flying much further’ Alvida chimes in, basically skating around the battle field thanks to her fruit

 

‘Bwhahahahahahahahaha’ Chess laughs even through the pain as his face was painted a bright yellow, unable to move or do much else besides laugh

 

‘Chess, No!’ Wapol yells, before sending Kuromarimo over to his court jester…I mean advisor

 

‘Damn, I knew he was a terrible person, but nobody can laugh like that and not be pure evil’ Valentine notes before jumping at a guard and slamming her 200kg body into his spine. During this Kuromarimo punches Chess with his boxing glove, smearing the paint enough to free him to Artemis’ spell

 

‘Thanks Kuromarimo, that brat’s paint is some really trippy shit’ Chess slurs as he stands back up

 

Before any more insanity could occur, the ground began to rumble, causing all the locals to look to the mountain, followed by the confused straw hats

 

‘What’s going on?’ Kaya asks

 

‘It’s an avalanche!’ Wapol yells, answering the question as he hops onto his hippo ‘Let’s get out of here. Serious mode’ the animal yawns before revealing its much larger legs

 

‘Don’t leave without us Wapol’ Kuromarimo shouts before him and Chess hop on

 

‘Everyone find cover, or shelter… actually maybe running would be best’ Kaos hums as Artemis jumps on his back and the pirates begin the potentially useless plan of outrunning an avalanche

 

TBC

 

LW: Well this is as good a spot as any to stop. See you in 2 weeks everybody!

 

 

** Lore/Info **

 

_Tony Tony Chopper_ Eater of the Hito Hito no mi/ Human Human Fruit

 

_Dalton_ Eater of the Ushi Ushi no mi/ Cow Cow fruit. Model Bison

 


	29. Drum Kingdom no more

LW: I’ve decided to do my best to keep going until the end of the Alabasta Saga before taking a break. Doesn’t seem right to leave you hanging in the middle of a story, so I hope to keep working through.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Drum Kingdom no more

 

When the avalanche finally ended all was quiet for a moment… before Wapol popped up and spat out his advisors looking annoyed

 

“Oh it was you I ate, no wonder it tasted awful” he grumbles

 

“So what now boss, that avalanche came out of nowhere and it’ll have disrupted our men and plans a bunch” Marimo asks

 

“We deal with them”

 

“Hm?” Chess voices in confusion

 

“Don’t you see, this is all the Straw Hat’s fault. Some of them have gone up the mountain, they must have set off the avalanche in order to stop us or try to kill me. They must pay!” Wapol yells angrily his advisors nodding dumbly rather than try question his logic.

 

A little away there was a puff as snow was displaced, Kaos and Artemis standing up after shrugging off the elder’s cloak

 

“Why does that thing have so much space Papa?” Artemis asks curiously

 

“Because I used my fruit on it, makes travel a lot easier” Kaos explains, sort of, pulling out a pipe and lighting it “Now, lets find the others before Wapol gets away” he says that just as Artemis and him have to dodge flaming arrows “Never mind” he sighs, luckily seeing others pulling themselves out of the snow (though why Usopp and Kaya’s face are bright crimson he doesn’t want to know)

 

“Forget the small fry, we’re taking back the castle. I’m going to eat the Royal Armory then come back down here and level this little Revolutionary Army Stronghold” Wapol loudly proclaims as he hops onto his trusty hippo, his minions climbing aboard not long after

 

“Hey get back here you bastard”

 

**Chi Chi Bomb**

 

If the noises made by Wapol and his hippo were any indication the attack hit it’s target, though the explosion also covered their retrea…advance towards the castle

 

“Damn, he got away” Victor sighs then notices the islanders digging “what we miss?”

 

“They’re looking for Dalton, he took a couple arrows from that weirdo so they’re worried he might be too weak to pull himself free” Valentina explains before passing them a shovel, Victor began digging while Kaos shifted Hebi into something resembling Daltons spade and used that instead. All was quiet besides the shovelling of snow until…

 

“We got him!” one of the villagers yell getting the others to come running “Oh god, I can’t find a heart beat”

 

“Kaya!” Ussop yells and the blond nods before sliding into the hole that contained the bison man, frowning as she examines him

 

“There’s nothing we can do, I can’t get a pulse, I think his heart stopped” she says sadly

 

“He’s not dead”

“But he will be”

“If you don’t let us help him”

 

The group look up to see the Ishi 20 were still around

 

“Hey look, there actually are doctors on this island, why didn’t we bring Nami to them?” Zoro asks in confusion

 

“Cause those are the Ishi 20, Wapol’s personal medical team” Alvida answers tensely

 

“She’s right, we can’t trust them they could kill him so he can’t stand up to Wapol ever again” a villager yells

 

“We’re still Doctors, just because we were forced to work for Wapol doesn’t mean we don’t still follow our oaths, or continue our medical research for the benefit of everyone” the one closest says, the others nodding in agreement

 

“It was all thanks to a certain quack who taught us to never give up” the oldest one, based on his grey moustache and weathered appearance adds “We can’t afford to lose anyone else like him”

 

“We’ll heal Dalton, while you go deal with Wapol” the apparent leader of the Ishi 20 declares

 

Vivi nods “Agreed. Everyone let’s go, we don’t know if our friends are able to handle a fight with Wapol after their journey up there, never mind if they got caught in the avalanche” she says, getting nods of agreement from the others

 

“That settles it. Onward to Castle crazy witch. Also as motivation, if Dalton dies, all of you die, as it’s your fault Wapol’s still alive after Dalton removes his head after all” Kaos threatens the doctors before the entire crew head for the mountain, luckily getting redirected to a rope bridge before they left the village itself.

 

_ A little later _

 

“What kind of tweedledoofer makes a castle this high up a mountain? And on this kind of island too” Valentina complains as they rise, Zoro pedalling as fast as he could to get them up to the mountain.

 

“Wapol, or more likely one of his ancestors. He doesn’t seem like the kind of man to put much thought or effort into plans, which a castle would require, plus it would inconvenience him to move all his stuff up here. This mechanism is clearly meant to bring supplies up to the castle, as we can’t all have reindeer capable of climbing to this height like Dr. Kureha, especially with provisions or luxuries given this would be a royal family” Kaos answers, it may be all bullshit but it was good enough for her “And we’ve arrived” he adds, stepping out of the transport then helping the others out.

 

_ Up at the castle (earlier) _

 

With the guys forcefully sat down (requiring liberal use of Heavy Point and Kureha’s ability to find dangerous weapons to throw with scary accuracy) Kureha told them Chopper’s story: (While said reindeer human hid, close enough to hear them though) how he’d been treated poorly by the other reindeer for being a freak with a blue nose (Can’t see red, so probably hate Rudolph because her nose glows in the dark), then he ate a fruit which made him smarter… but even more of a freak. He tried to use his new form to approach the nearby human settlement, but all they saw was a monster, chasing him away and trying to shoot him. Some time later he was found and taken in by a Dr. Hiriluk, where the little fellow expressed his interest in becoming a doctor too. She rather enjoyed the expressions on their faces when she told them Hiriluk stripped off in order to get Chopper to trust him when he said he wouldn’t attack him

 

Chopper came into Kureha’s care when Hiriluk practically walked into a trap set by Wapol: Claiming his 20 doctors were all sick and needed help in order to capture the last 2 doctors in Drum not under his control. Kureha basically thought _‘fuck em’_ but Hiriluk was already dying and had been accidentally poisoned by Chopper while the kid was trying to help him get better, so had nothing to lose when he took his medical supplies to the castle… with a bomb in his bag. He may not have killed Wapol in the explosion, but the intent was clear as well as the message: The Kingdom of Drum was dying and they needed to remove the rot in order to begin the heading process. Kureha took over Chopper’s tutorage and while his skill has grown in leaps and bounds, she has grown fond of the bipolar little cutie, seeing him as the child she never ended up having in the over a century of her life.

 

“He should join our crew, we need a doctor” Luffy states, both Sanji and Nami nod while Kureha seemed interested “Plus if he thinks he’s a freak he should meet some of our friends Shishishi”

 

**Bang!**

 

“Idiot!” Nami and Sanji yell, the cook kicking him into the wall, while Kureha laughs, until Chopper rushes in.

 

“Wapol. He’s coming!”

 

At Chopper’s yell Nami and Kureha tense, Sanji frowns and Luffy clenches his fists

 

_‘That guy tried eat our ship, now he’s here to hurt our new friends. I’m going to kick his ass’_

 

_ At the front of the Castle _

 

Wapol breathes deeply before sighing in relief “Finally I’ve returned to my home boys, Drum Castle”

 

“Hey freeloaders, get off my lawn!”

 

“Hm, what was that?”

 

“Um Sir” Kuromarimo pipes up “That was most likely Dr. Kureha. Remember the report, she’s been squatting in your castle since you left.”

 

“Grr, then get her out of there! She’ll stink up the place with that old people smell, it’ll take weeks to get rid of it” Wapol complains, then has to duck out the way of a battle axe that nearly removes his head once more

 

“Shut it you fat bastard, I’ll have you know I’m still in the prime of my life, a young 139 and don’t you forget it”

 

Wapol frowns “Well Dr. Kureha, the last doctor or Drum has finally revealed herself. You wouldn’t believe the number of my men I lost looking for you”

 

Kureha flicks down her shades “Does it look like I care? Leave Wapol, the kingdom of Drum is dead, it was rotten long ago but when you left this country finally had a chance at a fresh start”

 

“You old hag, you think you can tell me what to do I’m the king, arguing with the King is **TREASON** , and you know what that means”

 

“Wait a minute” everyone looks behind Kureha and Chopper to see Luffy running full speed toward them “Big mouth is mine”

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

Luffy’s fist slammed straight into a panicked Wapol’s face, though it showed he wasn’t back to 100% when Wapol only flew a short distance before landing with a bang in the snow, though it was still far enough to scare his 2 advisors as well as break his nose

 

“Damn it Luffy have you jumped the gun again?” Sanji complains as he runs out after him

 

“That guy is pissing me off, first he tried eat our ship, then he tried attack us while I had to carry you and Nami, and now he’s here to hurt the old lady and the cool reindeer guy. So I’m going to kick their ass!”

 

Sanji pinches the bridge of his nose but nods and pulls out a cigarette “Well we better get to work then”

 

“You idiot, don’t you know what you’ve done? Who you’ve struck?” Chess shrieks

 

“You just assaulted the King of Drum Kingdom, supreme World Government appointed and approved Sovereign of these parts” Kuromarimo adds/explains

 

“So?” Luffy asks, causing the trio to face plant “He’s a dick and he pissed me off, so I hit him”

 

“You idiot… Hey wait, what that flag up there? That’s not the proud flag of Drum Kingdom” Wapol yells

 

“Yep, we torched it when me and Chopper moved in, that’s Hiriluk’s flag the kid insisted on it. The old Quack died up here, might as well give him a huge ass memorial” Kureha answers dismissively

 

Wapol began to laugh “Oh yeah I almost forgot about that bastard. HOW DARE YOU TARNISH MY BEAUTIFUL CASTLE WITH THAT USELESS QUACK’S FLAG! TAKE IT DOWN RIGHT NOW!”

 

Chopper growls “No. I won’t take it down, it’s all I have left, it’s the symbol of his dream, the dream I intend to see through to the end” he declares, shifting into Heavy Point (Big Yeti looking thing)

 

“That’s him Sir”

 

“The monster that attacked us 6 years ago after Hiriluk blew himself up”

 

Wapol hums “Well if that soft hearted Dalton can beat him you too shouldn’t have a problem. Now go men, take back my castle from that crone and her pet” he orders

 

“Let’s deal with this quick” Kuromarimo shouts before tossing an afro straight at Kureha’s face… only for it to be stopped by Sanji

 

**Marimo Static Cling**

 

“Didn’t your mother ever teach you not to strike a lady?” he asks then starts bouncing around when the hairball refused to budge, not helped when Marimo tore off more pieces of afro and they stuck to his arms and other leg

 

“Watch out, those hairballs are quite dry” Chess jokes as he lights an arrow on fire

 

_‘Ah shit’_ Sanji thinks before the afro on his leg is grazed, turning from a hairball into a fireball. The duo laugh at his misfortune, until a wall of fur and muscle barrels towards them, Chess narrowly avoids the punch, the Zoan on the other hand continues his path… directly into Wapol’s open mouth

 

**Baku** **Baku grab**

 

“Hey, give us back our crewmate” Luffy yells about to run over when Sanji stops him

 

“Luffy run over there, then grab my leg from that position” Luffy raises an eyebrow but does so “Ready?” the cook asks and the lightbulb goes off as Luffy grins

 

**Gum Gum Cannonball**

 

Luffy slams into Wapol’s body at incredible speed, forcing him to spit out the once more cute looking Chopper, him and Luffy continue their trajectory, until they reach his hippo, who stops them but the energy sends flying way off into the distance

 

“”Wapol!” his advisors scream, helping him up as Luffy runs to go check on the others

 

“You good Chopper?” he asks with a grin

 

“Um yeah, thanks for saving me”

 

“That’s what friends are for, we help each other”

 

‘ _Friends? I… I have friends?_ ’ Chopper thinks, tearing up slightly

 

“Prepare to die StrawHats! Thanks to my Baku Baku no mi everything I eat becomes a part of me, now face the power of Wapol!”

 

**Wapol House**

 

The muncher transforms, a chimney popping out of his head, both his arms morphing into cannons and his body got even larger and even gained a door.

 

**Baku** **Baku Factory**

 

Wapol grabs his lieutenants and gobbles them up, strange noises emanate from his body before the door in the front opens. Much like how his Wapol House was made from combining the things he are, eating his men created a hybrid being retaining both of their faces but now armed with quad axes and crossbow.

 

“Now you must face King Wapol’s greatest warrior, the unbeatable Chessmarimo!” the hybrid spoke together through both faces, unnerving the others

 

“Great, as if these 2 weren’t stupid enough to begin with, now they’re on top of each other” Sanji grumbles, hitting Luffy so he stops gushing about how awesome that was.

 

“This kingdom’s most important Rule in my reign was this: All who disobey the king must be put to death. You broke this law and so will all die painfully, but I have to deal with that eyesore that is that quack’s flag first” Wapol announces before firing one of his arm cannons at the tower and flag

 

**Kaboom!**

 

“No!” Chopper screams, until the smoke clears and he sees the flag still intact

 

“You weren’t real pirates were you?” Luffy asks flatly “You were just fakers, which explains why you don’t understand what a pirate flag means”

 

Wapol frowns “Meaning? You idiot flags don’t mean anything; they just identify what something belongs to”

 

“If you think that you’re dumber than you look, which I didn’t think was possible”

 

A vein pops in Wapol’s head “YOU LITTLE SHIT TASTE MY CANNONS!”

 

**Kaboom!**

 

“There, now I’ve dealt with the flag and the idiot boy, who’s up for lunch?”

 

“That won’t work” Luffy says through the smoke, which clears to show both him and Hiriluk’s flag were okay “A flag is a pledge to fight and risk your life, it’s not something you can just laugh about and destroy!” he then looks down, scanning the ground for Chopper “Hey Chopper, I’m going to kick these guys asses for disrespecting the pirate flag, want to help?”

 

Chopper smirks as he shifts into Heavy Point “Always”

 

“Great, just give me a moment” Luffy says, trying to jam the end of the pole into the tower roof “You can start if you want”

 

Chopper was way ahead of him in that regard, inches from caving at least part of Wapol’s fat head in, when he was stopped by the 4 fists of Chessmarimo _‘Damn it’_

 

“Nobody gets to Wapol besides through us, meaning nobody gets to Wapol, period” Chessmarimo gloats as Chopper sighs and shifts into his smaller form

 

**Gum Gum Rocket**

 

Wapol and Chessmarimo panic when Luffy shoots down on a collision course with them, missing by a couple feet but still hitting hard enough he knocked both over

 

“I said I’d be a moment, hey Chopper, buddy, think you can deal with the 2 headed weirdo while I fight this guy?” he asks, noticing Sanji’s spine was fucked again, or maybe it was just the fact Kureha was standing on it, who knows

 

“I can do that”

 

“You think you can beat us freak? We’re undefeated”

 

“The name, is Tony Tony Chopper, the name was given to me by the greatest Doctor in the world. I will show no mercy for what you have done, his memory will not be tarnished by you” Chopper says, pulling out a yellow gumball looking thing

 

**Rumble ball**

 

“The effects last 3 minutes, which is long enough for me to deal with you” he says, putting it in his mouth and biting down with a crunch

 

“You don’t stand a chance, not against these” Chessmarimo says, launching 2 flaming arrows at the reindeer

 

**_Walk Point_ **

 

Chopper’s body shifts from his adorable form to something that is basically a normal reindeer, easily bouncing around the projectiles, to the annoyance of Chessmarimo and Wapol

 

“Transformations, that’s it? You’re a Zoan like Dalton, 3 forms that’s it, you’re a reindeer human I presume?”

 

**Heavy Point**

 

“No, I’m a human reindeer” he corrects bulking up to his ‘ _yeti_ ’ form

 

“Same difference” Chessmarimo scoff “We’ve seen all your forms so you’ve got no more tricks, which means we know you can’t stand up to these”

 

**Quatro Hammer**

**_Jump Point_ **

 

Chopper transforms into a more streamlined hybrid form before using his long legs to hop out of the way with ease

 

“What, but his hybrid form was the little thing from earlier, what’s that?” they ask as they go for another shot

 

**_Guard Point_ **

 

Chopper becomes an enormous mass of fur tanking the blows with no visible damage to himself.

 

“What the hell is going on? You Zoans have a 2 form limit where are you pulling these others out from?”

 

Chopper smiles “The Rumble Ball is a pill which enhances the power of the Devil Fruit transformation abilities, over the last 5 years I’ve managed to use it to create 3 additional forms. You can do the math yourself if you can count that high”

 

“A 7 form transformation sequence?”

 

“Correct, for once. Now take it in the face”

 

**_Arm Point_ **

 

The fur falls from his body as his new form was similar to his heavy point in most regards, besides a more reindeer like face and more importantly the overly muscular and still hoofed arms/hands, which he uses to shatter the hammers with one shot each.

 

“No, our hammers. You’ll pay for that”

 

**Chessmarimo special surprise: Quatro Axe**

 

The chimera men then charged at Chopper who seamlessly shifted between his points as he dodged every slash, which just made Chessmarimo madder and flails more erratically

 

“You said you could beat us in 3 minutes, but you’re not fighting, you’re just dodging” Chessmarimo taunts

 

**_Brain Point_ **

 

Chopper returns to his smaller form with a determined look in his eyes “I wasn’t just dodging, I was learning and searching for your weak point, and I found it”

 

**Scope**

 

‘ _There it is, Chess’s jaw’_ Chopper thinks just before Chessmarimo tries to cleave him in two, missing only because the reindeer disappears

 

“Where’d the little bastard go?” they mumble angrily before a rumble beneath them has panic run through them.

 

Chopper’s attack, boosted by the enhanced strength behind his Arm Point slam their hooves into the lower face’s jaw, breaking it and knocking the duo out

 

“That was for Hiriluk, you bastards”

 

“Hey Luffy, where’d Wapol go?” Sanji asks

 

“Who?”

 

“The fat guy with the big mouth”

 

“Oh, I don’t know”

 

“You idiot, you got distracted by Chopper’s fight didn’t you?” Sanji yells at him

 

“Yep… So what do we do?”

 

“Check the castle dumbass, that’s his target after all” Kureha orders

 

“Got it old lady” Luffy runs off just before Kureha could kick him, so she just glares at his retreating form

 

_ Meanwhile in the castle _

 

Nami was running for her life as some fat weirdo was chasing her, not having a clue who he was or why he seemed to hate the Straw Hats (though she blamed Luffy as it was almost always him) due to being mostly unconscious at the time. Her only reprieve was when she took some stairs and Wapol tried to jump down after her… and got stuck

 

“Shit, must have gained a little weight since I was last here (A LITTLE!)” Wapol grumbles “Never mind I can fix this”

 

**Baku** **Baku Factory**

 

Wapol proceeds to eat himself? then his metal mouth hops after Nami who while very confused still knows to run for her life. Finally the bucket stops bouncing and it spits out a much thinner Wapol, keys jangling as he once more chases after the red headed navigator. Well he would have if he hadn’t been kicked in the face by a very pleased with himself Luffy

 

“Found you big mouth. Now we fight for real” Luffy announces, but gets distracted when Nami notices how much her coat he’d ‘ _borrowed_ ’ was wrecked and began chewing him out (lucky she doesn’t have the Baku Baku no mi)

 

“Hello I’m still here” Wapol says after picking himself up

 

“Huh, you take a lot more hits than most people I’ve fought recently, oh well still gonna kick your butt”

 

“I’ll be doing the butt kicking once I devour the arsenal and my factory makes it part of my body… wait this isn’t the armoury this is the treasury… Excuse me!” he then runs off, his slimmer form making that easier than before

 

“Hey get back here” Luffy yells as he runs after him

 

Wapol sighs deeply as he stops, all this running wasn’t something he was used to “Damn, finally I lost that Straw Hat bastard”

 

“Hey Wapol!”

 

**SLAM**

 

Wapol recoils from the blow to the head, the slightly bloodied mace now resting on its wielder’s shoulders. As he clicked his jaw back into place the woman continues

 

“I’ve heard some pretty bad shit about you Wapol, from Vivi and Dalton, but right now, seeing you trying to kill an old lady and a racoon as well as hearing you try destroy a pirate’s flag, the symbol of their dreams and their pride, well I’m going to kick your ass on principle” she hefts the mace up, swinging it back as Wapol sneers and replies

 

“I think not”

 

**Tongue Cannon**

 

The explosion throws the Slip human through a wall as well as down a staircase without her bouncing off a single step.

 

“That all you got, where’s your big talk now? I hoped for a lot more, I like my women with attitude, well it’s more I enjoy breaking them of tha…” Wapol stops when he sees at the bottom of the stairs, cradling Alvida to his chest was the Straw Hat wearing boy from before, his face shadowed by the hat’s brim.

 

“Luffy” Alvida gasps, blushing in embarrassment when she sees that she’d coughed a little blood on his neck and cheek.

 

“You hurt my friends, you hurt people I care about, you won’t hurt anymore of **MY NAKAMA**!” he yells, Wapol winces at the pure rage flowing off this kid. Luffy gently sets Alvida down against the wall, then walks over to Wapol

 

**Tongue Cannon**

 

**Gum Gum Shotgun**

 

Wapol’s cannon blast hits at nearly point blank range, but Luffy keeps going, slamming both of his fists into the man’s metal jaw, denting it and throwing him back

 

“Wat ur yu?” he slurs through his broken jaw

 

“I’m pissed off that’s what” Luffy growls before his next punch throws him out of the castle, flying back to the start of their fight once more

 

“He’s still alive” Luffy hears Zoro yell up to him, confused for a second before shrugging and hopping out of the hole he’d just made.

 

Wapol pulls himself to his feet, only now noticing the others “Well lookie here, more straw hats. At least it means I can take you all out in one go”

 

“You’re going to need to try harder, this will have been your 3rd failure in as many days” Artemis points out bluntly, even Usopp chokes around a laugh as the man nearly falls over in shock and annoyance.

 

“You listen here you little brat, I’m the ruler of this island, appointed by the World Government itself, for going against me it puts you on the Black List of the most powerful group in the entire world… because they run it”

 

“Do you know why a winter island is almost as good as a summer island for someone like me?” Kaos asks with a smirk, clearly ignoring Wapol’s threats “The sunlight may be weaker, but the snow makes up for it and more” Sanji sees the 1st mate’s hands and arms change and despite his pain smiles

 

“What are you…”

 

**Dazzle**

 

**Gum Gum Bazooka!**

 

Luffy lands mere centimetres from the dazed and blinded Wapol, just as his arms begin to snap back, ensuring an undodgeable, point blank bazooka, once more turning the horrid man into a twinkle in the sky.

 

“Well he’s gone” Sanji says with a smile, one mirrored by Vivi as there was something really good about seeing that horrid man disappear, someone who gave people like her and her family a bad name.

 

“It seems something good did come from pirates coming to this island”

 

“Dalton, you’re alive!” Usopp yells, the bison man standing there, watching them with a sad smile

 

“Yes. The Ishi 20 are as good as its been said. Plus it seems they took your threat quite seriously as they almost threw me into the cable car the moment I said I wanted to follow you up and assist you, not that you guys needed it of course” Dalton chuckles

 

_ That evening _

 

“So I heard your spine is currently fucked” Kaos says with a smirk as he walks in on Sanji still strapped down “Good news is she let you keep your pants”

 

“Oh fuck off, not even this crazy lady would let people in if she made me do that”

 

“True, I’d charge for entrance” Kureha teases from the doorway

 

_‘Shit, another Nami’_ Kaos thinks as he slips out of the door before Kureha can continue working on Sanji’s spinal fissure

 

_ The morning, as the Straw Hats are leaving _

 

“Papa, do you think the reindeer guy will be joining us?” Artemis asks, Kaos’ eyebrows knit as he considers his answer

 

“I don’t know kiddo, but I’d like him to, he did a good job with Nami and seems ni…”

 

“Everybody run!” Chopper screams, as he barrels past/around them in his Walk Point, Artemis jumping onto the 1st mate’s back for fear of being run over. They were confused for a moment, until

 

“Get back here you brat! You think I’ll just let you go off and be a pirate, well you’ve got another thing coming” Kureha screams as she exits the castle, it finally dawning on everyone

 

“Well that answers that question” Kaos replies over his shoulder to a grinning Artemis, before everyone follows Luffy as he chased their newest crewmate down to the Merry.

 

There was just one thing that gave them pause….

 

“Wow”

“So cool”

“The fuck are we looking at?”

“That’s impossible”

 

Chopper just looks on silently, his face can barely contain his smile even as tears stream down his face, right there in front of him was the end result of Dr. Hiriluk’s work, the pink coloured snowfall looking just like the cherry blossoms he’d promised he would show the country, the old quack’s dream had finally come true.

 

_‘Fair well Chopper’_ Kureha thinks sadly as she stands with Dalton _‘Be the man you say you are, as well as the doctor your dad told me you’d be, and I made sure you would’_

 

TBC

 

LW: Hi everyone, sorry I’m late. The problem was I keep all my fanfiction on a single memory stick (bad idea I know), and when I went down to my dad’s this weekend I forgot it. Meaning today I had the job of splicing what I did over the weekend with what I’d already written, hopefully it’s not too disjointed.

 

R&R


	30. Family reunion 1 of ???, Fireman Ace

LW: Here we go, the main event itself the Alabasta Arc.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Family Reunion 1 of ???, Fire man Ace

 

The Straw Hat ship sailed it’s way to Alabasta, given the lack of issues at the moment Kaos had time to fulfil his main job, being the crew’s researcher, in this case his main focus being something only Dr. Vegapunk would also be working on, but that was less to do with the 1st mate’s level of work and more the fact Dr. V was a man who worked on everything. The only reprieve he had at the moment was peeking up to see if Vivi had noticed that Luffy had decided to use her duck as fishing bait, given the idiot was the reason they were all starving right now he was hoping for him to get painfully shown the error of his ways. Still at least nobody was going to understand his writing in its current form

 

“There should be a line” Kaos looks up from his notes (Nami’s navigation combined with Valentina’s helmsman skills making for a good speed) then to the girl reading over his shoulder

 

“Really, and how do you know?”

 

Artemis shrugs “Mama was teaching me, we haven’t gotten too far so I may be wrong but that symbol isn’t a word unless you put a slash through it” she explains, Kaos rereading the section she’d pointed out and chuckles as she was correct, that was the wrong symbol for that space.

 

Chuckling to himself he edits it while reaching into his waistcoat for his pocket watch, it was most likely incorrect now but he’d adjust it when they reached Alabasta, besides it did show how long they’d been sailing for. “Any idea on our progress?” he asks casually to which the girl shakes her head

 

“I slept through the trip to Little Garden. I have no idea where we are, only Nami or Vivi have any clue”

 

“Land ahoy!” Usopp yells from the crow’s nest

 

“Well that helps” Kaos chuckles closing the notebook and putting it in his coat “Time to get ready to disembark eh kiddo?”

 

Artemis nods “I’ll tell the others” she says, running into the ship’s main body

 

“Nice ship you got here” a high pitched voice purrs causing Kaos to look up again and twitched, standing on deck was a man in a swan themed coat, spherical outfit and ballerina flats as well as thick make up.

 

“LUFFY! WE GOT ANOTHER WEIRDO!” Kaos shouts, watching the crossdresser fall flat on his face in shock.

 

“Not again” the captain grumbles as the majority of the crew come out to see what’s wrong now.

 

“Hello, I’m Bon Clay, and I’ve kind of lost my way ha ha ha” he chuckles, scratching the back of his head, the he sees the girls on the upper deck “Hey cuties” he winks and they shudder

 

“So, what can you do?” Usopp asks, to which Luffy grins and starts hopping around wanting to see

 

Bon Clay grins “Okay then, let me show you” he says before slapping Luffy in the face, tossing him into the wall

 

“Hey! What you do that for?” Zoro growls, pulling out his swords until

 

“Wait just a moment green guy” ‘ _Luffy_ ’ says, waving his hands around “I’m just having a little fun, besides, you asked what I could do so why can’t I show off my devil fruit?”

 

“Wow, you look just like me” Luffy gasps as he gets back up and he was right, where Bon Clay stood, now was Luffy in his clothes

 

“Exactly, that’s the power of the Mane Mane no mi. I can turn into someone with my right hand, and if I touch my face with my left hand” as he does this his body and voice blurs/buzzes, before he was back to normal “it resets back to me. Hoy hoy” he then takes a moment to lightly touch each of the lower deck spectators (Usopp, Nami, Zoro, Chopper, Kaya) right until he reached Kaos.

 

“Touch me and I rearrange all of your faces” the reflect human growls, his powers coating his eyes in a way that sent shivers down the other man’s spine

 

“Right, well I didn’t need to slap you it was just more fun that way. All I needed was to touch you with my right hand for it to work” he then cycles through the crew he’d touched, even dropping back into Luffy for a moment before stopping on Nami “And that’s not all, I change my body as well as my face and voice” to demonstrate (s)he opens his blue dancer’s shirt to show off Nami’s bare chest (the clothes don’t change, so no bra for fake Nami), causing the guys to stare in surprise… before Not Nami gets punched in the face by Real Nami, reverting him to normal and turning her hand black for a split second, though it seemed only Artemis noticed that little factoid, her eyebrows shooting into her hairline before returning to their normal position.

 

“You okay swan guy?” Luffy asks as the man gets back to his feet

 

“I’m fine straw hat, but I think that’s enough of using my powers for today” he sighs, to the uproar of protest coming from Luffy, Usopp and Chopper “Oh if you insist” he then began pirouetting, changing his faces randomly to the amusement of the trio. While he did so, one of the more normal faces he produced caused Vivi to tense up and clench her fists

 

“So you saw it too” the bluenette turns at the voice

 

“Valentina?” she whispers then nods

 

“Hey Mr. 2, get off our ship” the lemon lady screams at him, causing the ballerina to pout

 

“That time already Miss Valentine’s Day? Oh look my ship is back, ta ta babies” he does one more spin before jumping over to the ship that sailed up along side them “Men, get back to work”

 

“Yes Mr 2 sir, Bon Clay Maam”

 

“That was Mr. 2!” Was yelled by quite a few of the straw hats

 

“Yep, and now he’s got your faces in his memory bank” Valentina answers, heading back to the steering pole so they keep on course

 

“You okay Vivi?” Luffy asks, stretching up to check on the princess

 

“One of his faces, it was my father Nefetari Cobra”

 

“The King of Alabasta” Nami gasps

 

“But how did he even get it?” Kaya wonders

 

“He probably has faces of other palace staff, all it takes is one touch and he has you” Vivi mumbles before tensing for a second, as Luffy and Alvida run their hands along her spine

 

“Don’t worry Vivi, once we beat Crocodile we won’t have to worry about any of this any more” Luffy declares with a serious look

 

“And the next time we see ballerina, I’ll give him a mace to the junk, think that’ll help?” the smooth woman asks with a teasing smile, causing a watery laugh to escape the bluenette.

 

“Hey guys” the trio looks down to Nami grinning “I have an idea to help with our Mr. 2 problems” she says, pulling out a black marker

 

“Every time Nami pulls things out of thin air I worry, at least it’s not rope this time” Luffy muses, causing a few crewmates to chuckle and Nami to turn beat red

 

“Tying you guys together was an option” Kaos added before letting Nami continue, drawing an X on her arm, which she covered with a bandage

 

“Mr. 2 has a template of our bodies, things like scars, birthmarks and tattoos as well as the general proportions and shape. But the X is just me ink, so we can use it to identify each other as something other than a doppelganger”

 

“That’s a great idea Nami” Luffy grins, jumping down and letting her put an X on him, shortly followed by all the others who were on the lower level. She got to the remaining crew members later, even Carue, who wasn’t sure Mr. 2 could even copy her form, he could do Chopper because he was part human but she was all duck.

 

Upon docking at Alabasta

 

“I’m hungry, going to go look for a restaurant” Luffy states before hopping off the ship and running off

 

“Wait you idiot, we need to come up with a plan, agree on a meeting place, lots of other important logistics,” Nami argues but their captain was long gone

 

“I presume the Merry is a viable meeting option? And if not I could just follow the trail to these guys and from them” Kaos offers, waving his hands in the direction of Chopper, Artemis, Victor and Valentina “After all, leaving Luffy alone…”

 

“Is a disaster waiting to happen” Nami finishes tiredly “Go try minimize the damages his idiocy causes” she jokingly orders, to which Kaos smiles and nods before running after the rubber boy “Everyone else, we need to be discreet and subtle, do at least the rest of you understand the meaning of those words?”

 

“Miss Nami” Artemis calls, pointing down the shore to a separate alcove “We have a problem”

 

“That’s Mr.3’s ship” Vivi gasps, and she was obviously right, given the abundance of 3’s everywhere as well as the fact it appeared to be made of wax

 

“Yep, and he knows the 3 of us have betrayed Crocodile and joined the Straw Hats” the artist says bluntly

 

“Guess Vivi won’t be the only one looking over her shoulder in Alabasta” Valentina says with a frown

 

“Hopefully we can find Mr. 3 before he can blab to Crocodile about our indiscretions” Victor offers, trying to be a little optimistic “As unlikely as that is. Otherwise I guess we’ll need to find some disguises”

 

“Another reason to head into town” Alvida agrees “Can we go now Nami?”

 

The navigator sighs “Alright, let’s go but at least try cause less of a scene than Luffy and Kaos”

 

“Won’t be difficult, Kaos is his namesake at times and I’m surprised by that logic Luffy wasn’t named Armageddon, or Disaster” Sanji jokes

 

“Do you think that’s what the D stands for?” Kaya asks

 

“Honestly I don’t know, but it has to mean something” Usopp answers with a shrug of his shoulders

 

 

Deeper into the city

 

Despite the relatively high class look to the place, there was still a shirtless man in a cowboy hat and shorts eating soup at the counter “It’s good” could be heard mumbled through his meal

 

“Thank you sir. Though if you don’t mind me asking, what is someone like you doing in Alabasta?”

 

Ace’s expression pinches for a moment before continuing “I’m looking for someone…” he then smiles for a few seconds and reaches into his pocket “… a few someones actua…” then collapses face first into the bowl

 

“Oh no he’s dead” a patron screams

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

“HE’S ASLEEP!!”

 

After a few minutes Ace pulls himself out of his food, blinks then wipes his face and continues eating as if nothing had happened, he hoped he could find those idiots, it had been way too long since they’d seen each other.

 

‘ _I may have Pops and the others, but you 2 will always be the most important, especially after Sabo_ ’ he thinks, smiling sadly while he finishes his meal, just as a familiar marine enters the restaurant.

 

“Portas D. Ace, what’s a division head for the Yonko Whitebeard doing in Paradise?” Smoker asks gruffly, and there’s a collective shudder when the civilians realise what the tattoo on Ace’s back is, though how they mistook a skull with a crescent moustache as anything but the Jolly Roger of the Whitebeard Pirates is beyond me.

 

Ace smiles as he turns to face the Captain “I’m looking for my brothers” he answers vaguely, though from his expression he just saw no need to give anymore information over to a marine like Smoker “anything else?”

 

“That you come with me, quietly”

 

Ace’s smile twists into a smirk “No thanks that doesn’t sound that fun, so I’ll pass”

 

Smoker growls “I had a feeling you’d say something like that” he sighs “I’m here on the trail of another pirate and I really don’t want to get involved in the affairs of a Yonko without reason”

 

“So just let me walk away” Ace offers

 

“That’s the thing” Smoker says, his arm starting to exude smoke “I can’t”

 

**_“FOOD!”_** Was yelled as a Luffy shaped blur crashes into both of them, sending them flying through the wall

 

“Damn it Luffy, can you go anywhere without causing a scene?” Kaos groans as he finally catches up with his captain

 

“I didn’t cause a scene in Little Garden” Luffy argues, sitting down and proceeding to stuff his face

 

“You pissed off some plant eating dinosaurs enough they tried to eat you” Kaos deadpans “That counts” he then grabs a plate of meat from under Luffy’s nose, though there was enough food in front of them Luffy didn’t seem to notice

 

“Straw Hat!” Smoker yells as he renters the building

 

“Hey smokie” Luffy greets with a smile

 

“I’m taking you down in the name of justice” he growls, reaching for his jute

 

“That’s nice, but I prefer to… run away” Luffy and Kaos make a break for it, just after the rubber boy shoves all the remaining food into his expanded mouth, Smoker and Ace running after them, but for different reasons.

 

Jumping across rooftops, through alleys, around market stalls and somehow running into the rest of the crew (who were annoyed they hadn’t managed to shake their marine tail BEFORE running over to them) they managed to evade capture, though with the addition of Lucina and Tashigi at least Smoker had more than useless canon fodder as assistance. Jumping to the front of the mob Smoker prepares to capture the entire crew

 

**White Blow**

**Heat Haze**

 

Smoker’s attack was feet from the duo (who had not quite caught up to the others, due to them running the second they saw the size of the marine prescience chasing them) when the space between them erupted in flame, separating pirates and marine, when it cleared Ace was standing in the centre, his arm and some of the other hands fingers taking the form of deep red flames

 

“You again” Smoker grunts

 

“Yes. You may have smoke, but against my fruit we would be here all day” Ace says with a serious tone

 

“Ace, is that you?” Luffy asks in shock

 

“You guys haven’t changed a bit have you?” he asks teases

 

“You eat some kind of Devil fruit?” Luffy asks, causing Kaos to face palm and Ace to chuckle

 

“Sure did, the Mera Mera no mi. I’m a Fire Man”

 

“Hence the moniker of _Fire Fist Ace_ ” Tashigi adds in her usual expositional way, while Luci sneers and draws her Falchion

 

“Yep. Now isn’t the best time for a chat, so why don’t you leave and I’ll catch up later okay?”

 

“Okay, see you around Ace”

 

_Clang_

 

Kaos smirks as his blade clashes with Nylock Lucina’s, the towering woman’s expression pure rage “You know, sneaking is easier if you aren’t constantly yelling about **JUSTICE!** And saving your adorable little brother from the corrupting influences of piracy and big titted archers, I hear on the Grandline there are a lot of people with that body type around so you may have a little trouble there” he says before shoving the bluenette back, slashing her leg with a downward swing “You missed one Ace” he points just before having to jump out of the way of another swipe

 

“You die today!” the bluenette screams, nearly skewering the reflect human, but losing her blade when his kusarigama hooked into the void in the hilt of her sword, then yanked it from her grasp before kicking her back to Smoker and his group, enabling them to make an escape

 

“What I don’t get is why you’re getting in my way and helping the Straw Hats” Smoker wonders out loud

 

Ace smiles as his body begins to fully transform into fire “Can’t a guy help his little brothers out? Sounds like at least one of you understand that”

 

“I am nothing like you” Lucina scoffs

 

“Yeah I can see that, by the sound of things my brothers actually want to see me” he laughs as she silently steams, knowing even with the coating on her blade she wouldn’t be able to find Ace in the flames to hit him.

 

“Let’s get this over with” Smoker growls, turning entirely into smoke as he charges Ace, the duo forming a fire/smoke twister in the sky which held everyone’s attention long enough for the Straw Hats to escape, now if only Luffy didn’t go off in the wrong direction in a very Zoro like manner, which meant Kaos had to go look for him as the crew were once more without their idiot captain.

 

“Hey where’d everybody go?” Luffy wonders, having set down the barrel he’d been thrown by Zoro in the alley and was now sitting on it while he tried to think “Weird”

 

“Well looks like buying you time to escape was pointless as always you rubber brained idiot” Luffy looks up and grins, seeing Ace standing on the roof

 

“Hi Ace”

 

“Hey Lu, it’s been a while” Ace returns the greeting before hopping down to Luffy’s level, the Straw Hat captain getting off the barrel as he does.

 

“Yep, how long’s it been Ace?” Luffy asks, the 2 showing off as usual, this time with arm wrestling

 

“Not sure, but you’re exactly the same as I remember, taller but that’s about it, both of you have”

 

The brothers stare intensely as they try force the other to yield, this could have lasted for hours… but we all get bored easy so someone kicks the barrel to pieces

 

“Hey! I almost had him!”

“In your dreams cry baby”

 

“Ah hem” Kaos coughs “Luffy, you still have a long way to go before you can beat Ace. Ace, don’t be such a dick, I’m not afraid to kick you through a window again, Dadan isn’t here to protect you this time”

 

Ace grins “Same to you, I’ll be able to kick your ass easy”

 

“Hey Ace” the fireman stops and turns to Luffy “Why are you in Alabasta, I mean it’s great to see you but still?”

 

Ace sighs “You never got my message did you? The one I left on Drum Island”

 

“Message?”

 

“Best take that as a no” Kaos murmurs, now leaning against a wall with his hat over his eyes

 

Ace shrugs “It’s fine, it was mostly just telling you I’d be in Alabasta for a couple days, and as we caught up you can clearly see it anyway so no biggie. I’m here on important business”

 

“Business?” Luffy repeats curiously

 

“Yep. I’m part of the Whitebeard Pirates” Ace replies

 

“A Yonko’s crew in 3 years, nice work Firefly” Kaos grins, and Luffy’s eyes sparkle

 

“A Yonko, like Shanks? Cool!”

 

“It sure is, this is our mark, and my pride” Ace explains, turning so Luffy could see his tattoo of Newgate’s Jolly Roger “So, what do you saw about you and your crew joining up? Come on it would be fun”

 

Kaos raises an eyebrow but looks to Luffy, he was the captain so it was his answer that mattered “No thanks we’re good”

 

Ace laughs with a smile on his face “Yeah I had a feeling, though I do wish Pops could have met you 2, would have been a hell of a crazy day. Still, he’s the greatest pirate and the greatest man I’ve ever met, so I’m going to make sure he becomes King of the Pirates”

 

Luffy frowns “Not if I get there first” he retorts almost childishly, causing his older brothers to chuckle

 

“You know the rest of the crew are waiting for you Luffy?” Kaos asks standing up properly once more “We should probably head back”

 

Luffy nods “Good point, hey Ace, come meet our friends” Luffy orders, linking his arm with Ace and beginning to pull him in a random direction, which became the way to the ship with some _gentle_ prodding from the middle sibling.

 

“So, this crew of yours, who you got?” Ace asks, having not got a good look at the fleeing group just ahead of his brothers during th commosion

 

“Well there’s us of course, but there’s also this really tough guy with green hair and fights with 3 swords, he wants to be the greatest swordsman. Then we have a navigator who loves money and tangerines, she even grows them on the ship and they’re good. We also have a liar who’s wicked with a slingshot and a gunslinger, well Kaos calls her that. We also have a cook who makes the best food ever, and a woman with a mace that turns people into paste in like one shot”

 

“And that’s just the ones from the East Blue” Kaos comments with a grin

 

“Right, we also have a princess and her giant duck, a guy with exploding boogers, a lemon girl who can make herself really heavy, an artist with magic paint and finally we got a talking reindeer as our doctor, that last one came from Drum Kingdom”

 

Ace whistles “That’s quite a crew you got there”

 

“I know, everyone is so interesting”

 

The 2nd division commander meets Kaos’ stare and laughs “Probably, but I bet you’re the most interesting one of them all”

 

“Stop right there” the trio follow the barked order mostly out of confusion as scruffy looking men appear from every nearby alley “Fire Fist Ace, your head is mine, it’s my ticket to a promotion” the apparent leader of the gang states causing Luffy and Kaos to turn to one another

 

“Croc’s men?”

 

“Baroque Works”

 

“Hey those guys with him, don’t they look a lot like Straw Hat Luffy and Mirror Master Kaos?” One of the goons notice, causing their leader to double take

 

“Hey you’re right, that promotion is looking more likely with each passing moment. 3 dead pirates and a number is ours!”

 

“So we should probably get you to your ship before they start to worry” Ace says as the trio walk around the idiots due to being distracted by greed

 

“Hey, you can’t just walk away from us. Get them men!”

 

What follows is almost predictable at this point, many idiots underestimate the power of Luffy and those close to him and are therefore rather painfully fed dirt. The difference was it was a family bonding moment too, with Ace rather skilfully sidestepping blades and billions, Luffy bouncing around like he’d been fed Caffeine, cocaine and molten sugar directly into his veins and Kaos had forgone his blade in favour of something more physical, that being tossing them around like the cannon fodder they were. This continued right up until the main guy stepped in, nearly splitting Luffy in half before taking a fist to the face… and out the other side.

 

Ace grins “Nice to see someone’s been keeping this dumbass alive in my absence” he teases as Kaos removes his still milky white, though now blood covered hand from the corpse

 

“You really need to stop sticking yourself into people” Luffy says in the closest he’s ever come to deadpan, causing the others to smirk

 

“Haven’t had any complaints yet” Kaos replies, the other 2 laugh and continue the journey while the billions were frozen in fear

 

Reaching the shore Luffy starts bouncing around excitedly again “I see the ship, it’s right there” he says with a grin “Hey guys” he shouts and waves, Kaos pinching the bridge of his nose and Ace laughs, having missed moments like this. The rubber boy loops one arms around Kaos’ waist and shoots the other out to the Going Merry, catapulting both of them onto her deck, right on top of Sanji and Victor, something neither of them were happy about

 

“Luffy you idiot!” Sanji yells, kicking the boy off him, Kaos rolling his eyes as he helps Victor up and readjusts the mans glasses so they were no longer crooked

 

“Sorry about that…”

 

“The captain’s an idiot, I know” the bomber man finishes with a chuckle, patting himself down, only then did the brothers notice the change in garb.

 

Nami, Vivi, Kaya and Valentina were dressed as dancers, the first 2 in blue and the latter in yellow, given Alvida’s usual outfit she was able to keep it, though switched out her pants for the same skirt as the others. Artemis was spared this fate and was dressed in the bandit costume the guys were wearing, partly due to her age and also because Sanji knew if Kaos even thought he looked at the artist the same way he did every other girl on the crew or he walked passed he’d find out what it feels like to be fisted up to the elbow, or preferable getting hilted by Traptrix and setting it off.

 

“Nice, but why are you all dressed funny?” Luffy asks in confusion, which just gets him another punch

 

“We can’t just walk around as we were, with you being pirates and me being the princess” Vivi explains “Plus we needed clothes that would let us get through the desert… admittedly letting Sanji get us our clothes instead of say Nami was a bad idea but it’s too late to do anything about it no” Kaos laughs at the way Sanji curls up in a corner at Vivi’s blunt criticism.

 

True, hey Kaos, where’d Ace go?”

 

“Who’s Ace?”

 

“He’s our big brother” Luffy and Kaos answer with a smile, it was good to have the family back together even if it was just for a moment, then the elder moves away from the decking, causing Luffy to look at him in slight confusion

 

“So this is you crew? Seems like a fun bunch” Ace smiles as he lands on deck, causing the other 2 to grin and some of his crew to pale

 

Luffy laughs before turning to the others “Guys, I want to introduce you to my oldest brother Ace. Ace, this is my crew, we’re the Straw Hat Pirates, cause of my hat” he says trying to break the ice, the still shirtless fireman waves with a familiar smile

 

“Your brother”

“Is Fire Fist Ace”

“Of the Whitebeard Pirates?” 3 of the 4 former Baroque Works Agents ask fearfully, while Artemis was hiding like Chopper, only the correct way so she was mostly hidden behind Kaos

 

“Papa, is Uncle Ace nice like Uncle Luffy?” she asks quietly, though not enough Ace didn’t notice her and turn to his big little brother

 

“You have a kid already?” he squeaks

 

“Adopted, more or less. I’m trying to save her mom from Crocodile, well she wants to and I just offered to help”

 

Ace nods in understanding “Makes sense. The mom… is she hot?” he asks, shocked when Kaos shrugs

 

“Mama’s the most beautiful woman in Paradise” Artemis declares, causing the Whitebeard Commander to ask what to him was an obvious question.

 

“Your Mom’s Boa Hancock? Damn Shimmer you got the full Luck of the D’s it seems” he says with a laugh

 

“No. Amazon Lily is in the Calm Belt between Paradise and the East Blue, it’s not technically part of the Grand Line” the artist states bluntly, surprising everyone

 

“Damn. Hey Luffy, how’s it feel to no longer be the youngest, but still be the dumbest person on the crew?” Sanji asks to which Luffy laughs

 

“Chopper’s like 10 and he’s our Doctor, I never stood a fucking chance. Shishishi”

 

“Anyway, thanks for taking care of my little brother, I mean he’s a handful so I’m sure both Kaos and I appreciate you not leaving him to watch Luffy on his own” Ace says jokingly, causing a few of the Straw hats to return a smile or nod in agreement

 

“Handful doesn’t even begin to describe it” Nami sighs but her expression is still positive, sure Luffy was a moron and Kaos was insane, but they grow on you and when you’re backed into a corner, this was the crew she would want to be on.

 

“Are we sure this guy is their brother, he acts nothing like them” Usopp whispers

 

“I’d agree with you, but Luffy and Kaos are really different too, so that doesn’t exactly work in your favour” Zoro retorts, but before Usopp could try argue his point Vivi yelps

 

“Those are the Billion’s ships”

 

“Looks like we have a fire fight on our hands” Victor says, himself and Ussop running to the cannons while Valentina returns to the steering pole.

 

“Don’t worry guy, I’ll handle this” Ace calls to them before hopping off the ship onto his much smaller vessel, confusing the Straw Hats, with the exception of captain and first mate who can’t stop grinning in anticipation.

 

“He’s going to fight them all by himself?” Kaya asks fearfully

 

“Relax, you can’t work for a Yonko and fall in Paradise, Ace will be fine” Kaos says, partly as a comfort. And he was right, Ace outmanoeuvring the Billion’s ships before letting loose the move which got him his name:

 

**Fire Fist**

 

The fireball he produced tore through all the Baroque Work ships with almost no resistance, leaving only his tiny boat intact

 

“Have I mentioned how glad I am to have already jumped ship as far as Baroque Works in concerned?” Valentina asks, having seen the destruction when she came out onto the deck

 

“Okay, he’s their brother, nobody else is that freakishly strong” Usopp concedes, getting a few chuckles from around the Merry.

 

_ A little later _

 

“Luffy, Kaos, I got 2 things for you guys” Ace takes off his hat and pulls out 2 pieces of paper, handing one to each “That Luffy is a Vivre Card, more specifically part of MY card. This will seek out it’s owner no matter where they are, so you will always be able to find me and know I’m okay, I know you guys worry about me as much as I you” Luffy’s eyes shine as he examines the card, grinning the entire time “As for you, that’s the code to get you through to the Queen Den Den Mushi on the Moby Dick, hopefully I’ll be wrapping up this job soon and we can keep in touch when I get back to Pop’s ship”

 

“Finally we can do something other than feed the snail Kaos picked up in Loguetown, at least the thing stays in his room though” Nami mumbles as Kaos accepts the Den Den number and Luffy attaches the Vivre card to the brim of his hat “So why are you out here anyway, aren’t you the head of an entire division, why are you all alone?”

 

Ace frowns “I’m out here looking for a man who calls himself Blackbeard…” Ace begins

 

“We’ve heard of him, he’s the one who was terrorising Drum Kingdom a while back” Alvida interrupts

 

“Yeah, I heard that too, it’s why I was there and was able to leave the message Luffy never got. Anyway, he used to be a Whitebeard pirate, part of my division in fact until he did the unthinkable; he killed a member of our crew and fled. As the head it is my responsibility, so I can’t stop until I get him. My most recent information indicates the bastard is in Yuba so that’s where I’m heading”

 

“Hey Vivi, isn’t that where we’re supposed to be heading?” Luffy asks, the name sounding familiar to him

 

“Why yes, Yuba is where the rebels are supposed to be stationed”

 

“Great, Ace, why don’t you stick with us for a while, seeing as we’re all going the same way” Luffy grins and Ace returns it

 

“I don’t see why not, be nice to spend a little more time with my brothers and their friends” he laughs as the crew toast their temporary new member.

 

With the marines

 

“Captain Smoker, Captain Nylock, we’re combed the city but no sign of Straw hat or his crew” Tashigi reports, both her superiors frown

 

“This brat is causing us a lot more trouble than he should” Lucina grumbles, fiddling with the bandage on the cut Kaos gave her

 

“True, but there’s something else that we need to consider” both bluenettes look up in confusion “One of the women in his crew, I think it was Vivi”

 

Tashigi gasps “Nefetari Vivi, Alabasta’s princess?” she asks

 

Lucina raises an eyebrow “But why would she be with the Straw Hats, they haven’t even been a crew as long as she’s been out of the public eye so how could their paths have even crossed?”

 

Smoker sighs, a thick plume of smoke escaping his mouth “ I don’t know but you’re right about one thing, she didn’t act like a hostage, she acted like part of the crew” Lucina sneers but Tashigi looked confused

 

“Captains!” a random marine interrupts their conversation “Mr 11 was killed while we were out looking for Straw hat, who he have not managed to locate yet I’m afraid. We have also not been able to locate his crew or Fire Fist, sorry Captains”

 

Smoker stands “Then stop, it doesn’t matter anyway we know where he’s going even if we don’t know where he is” at this both women perk up, this was news

 

“Where is he going?”

 

“He mentioned Crocodile, so he’s heading for him”

 

“Sir Crocodile, of the 7 WarLords of the Sea?” Tashigi gasps and if the scowl is any indication then for once Smoker and Lucina appear to agree on something, it’s one of her more moderate stances if they were all being honest

 

“Personally I hate the War Lord system, a pirate is a pirate regardless of if you give them a title or not, but Crocodile is one of the worst and on top of that Alabasta is his territory as they call it”

 

“So that’s why Straw Hat is here”

 

Lucina nods “And maybe it’s why Vivi is working with him, if she thinks he can remove the croc from her homeland she might see him as the lesser of 2 evils, it’s stupid and naïve to trust a pirate, but there’s at least some logic behind it”

 

“That’s settled then, we find Crocodile and Straw Hat will be there as well, and we might be able to get answers out of one of them or maybe even the princess herself”

 

TBC

 

LW: Well we’ve met Mr. 2 and Ace, that’s pretty much the main point of this chapter. See you in 2 weeks :D

 

Bon Clay: Ate the Mane Mane no mi/ Clone clone fruit

 

He can alter his appearance to match that of anyone he’s touched with his right hand, changing back when he touches his own face with his left.

 

Portas D. Ace/ Fire Fist Ace

 

Ate the Mera Mera no mi/ Flare flare fruit (2nd logia to show up in the series)

 

Heat Haze: It’s a fireball, a really big fireball

Fire Fist: Honestly reminds me of the pokemon move Fire Punch, only kicked up to eleven, but should we expect any less from a D, who’s a division commander for a Yonko, and Luffy’s older and stronger brother? Didn’t think so

 

Kaos

 

Kusarigama/Chain scythe: A Japanese weapon consisting of the aforementioned scythe attached to a metal chain with a heavy weight on the end.

I’ve mentioned this as well as added it to Kaos’ list of forms for the Hebi no Oni no mi, mostly because it is the closest thing I can find to a real weapon that functions like Kaos uses it’s base form.


	31. Braving the desert

LW:……. I got nothing, on with the chapter.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Braving the desert

 

The straw hats were trundling along on the path to Eramalu, the 1st stop on their journey to Yuba where the rebel camp was, during which Luffy and Usopp were (reluctantly) helping Sanji clean, Ace was watching in amusement, Zoro Vincent and Alvida were training, Kaya and Valentina were relaxing and Kaos was helping Artemis with her symbols at the artist’s request. According to Nami they were making good time, which may have been one of the reasons Vivi asked them to make land for a moment. Once they did she called over Carue who looked confused

 

“Listen my friend, I need you to do something very important for me okay?” the duck nods and Vivi puts a letter under her hat “I need you to head to the Capital and deliver this letter to my father, in it are all the information us and Igaram were able to gather on the situation, as well as telling him that I have returned home accompanied by some strange but good friends who are here to help. Got that?”

 

Quack’ Carue nods, doing her equivalent of a smile

 

“Alright then, stay safe and conserve your water. I’ll see you soon” Vivi hugs her duck who nuzzles before hopping off the ship and disappearing in a trail of dust/sand like the Roadrunner “You idiot, pace yourself!” Vivi yells even though Carue was beyond her hearing range “Sigh, well hopefully she makes it to the capital without incident”

 

“She’ll be fine” Artemis predicts “After all, without you on her back she’ll be just another duck to Baroque Works”

 

“I suppose you’re right. Nami we can get back to sailing now”

 

“On it Vivi”

 

A little while later they reached their destination, at least as far as water travel, everyone covering up (Much to Sanji’s disappointment), with the exception of Kaos who just flipped the hood of his cloak. Zoro had just dropped anchor when…

 

“The hell are those?”

 

The shore filled with odd Dugong/Turtle hybrids, a fist raised as they cheerfully bleated

 

“Kung Fu Dugongs, maybe this isn’t the best place to anchor” Valentina mumbles

 

“If you want to come ashore you have to beat me but that’s never going to happen you shell-less cowards” Chopper says, everyone looks at him in confusion “What? I’m an animal, I understand them”

 

“Wait, did you understand Carue?” Vivi asks

 

Chopper nods “Yep, she reminds me of Nami actually, a sneaky, scaredy cat, but willing to fight when she needs to” the reindeer explains, the navigator smiling and playfully taps his hat, rather than slam his head into the deck for comparing her to a duck.

 

Usopp smirks “Nobody calls me a coward and gets away with it” he declares as he jumps off the edge of the ship “Usopp attack!”

 

“Usopp no!” Vivi yells, but it was too late, the odd creature easily able to take out the sniper “Kung Fu Dugongs are really tough”

 

“They’re not so tough” Luffy scoffs, taking out the boss in one punch

 

“THAT’S BAD TOO!” the bluenette yells, but once more the was nothing she could do, Luffy was now mobbed by sparkly eyed dugongs “When they lose a match they become the winner’s pupil”

 

Ace sighs “Only you Luffy”

 

“This was a lose/lose situation, maybe Valentina was right” Kaos says as he jumps off the deck, the lemon girl surprised he’d even heard her “Really hope this works” he says mostly to himself “Hey Luffy!”

 

“Yeah?” Luffy turns, not expecting a punch to the face, of course beign rubber he just bounced back and shot forward, into a reflect armoured fist

 

**BANG**

 

“Wow, nice to see he finally got it to work” Ace chuckles, sounding really impressed, confusing the others until he explained “The reflect armour can turn a devil fruit power back on itself, sometimes even removing it’s best qualities, in Luffy’s case his immunity to blunt force damage. It just never seemed to work on demand before, it was just something like a 60% chance of success” they nod in understanding as Luffy was on the ground with a missing tooth and a busted lip

 

“Wh jew hig mey?” Luffy splutters

 

“Best plan I had to get the dugongs off you” Kaos explains, and he was right, the new problem was…

 

“Now they’re following you around!”

 

“Shit”

 

“Any more bright ideas?” Nami asks, a tic forming on the back of her head

 

“Just one”

 

Bang!

 

One of the dugongs yelp as Kaos shoots it in the flipper, the others shake their fists angrily at the purplette before scurrying away in fear

 

Vivi blinks “Wait, how did you know they detested weapons as they see them as dishonourable?” she asks, ignoring Artemis’ amused chuckling in the background

 

“I didn’t, I just though shooting one would get them to go away, and I didn’t want to kill any of them unless I absolutely had to. Thick you could remove the bullet before we go chopper?”

 

The reindeer nods “I got it”

 

A little later the dugongs were all at the ship again, with Chopper playing translator “You are dishonourable, but strong, and we respect that. Good luck and begone”

 

“Well that could have gone worse” Zoro thinks aloud as they begin their trek into the desert, Luffy waving at the happy little critters until they are out of sight

 

“Oh yes” Vincent agrees and they continue walking until Vivi stops dead

 

“Something wrong Vivi swan?” Sanji asks with heart eyes

 

“Are we in Yuba yet?” Luffy asks with a grumpy look on his face

 

“No this isn’t Yuba, we are in what remains or Eramalu, what was once known as the city of green” she explains

 

“This place was green” Luffy wonders, getting a light tap from Nami for his stupidity

 

Vivi sighs “Look around you, this is what Baroque Works has done to my country, this is what my people have had to suffer through” he declares, Vincent and Valentina look down in guilt, while Artemis just looks on, trying to imagine what this ruin once looked like

 

“Are you sure, this place looks just a s desert as the last few steps we took?” Zoro asks, knowing his sense of direction this would be common but he was sure Vivi knew her way around the kingdom even in broad strokes

 

“Yes. Water has always been scarce on this island but through conservation and using it sparingly we were able to make this place flourish like anywhere else in the world, but that was when we still got rain. Something which hasn’t happened in 3 years”

 

“3 years! That can’t be natural”

 

“It wasn’t. Never in the history of Alabasta have the rains just stopped, but there was still one place where there was rain, and more of it than usual, Alubarna the capital city. People called it the Kings Miracle, his power over the island allowing his city to remain lush and strong, until one day a cargo ship arrived, carrying dance powder”

 

“Dance powder?”

 

Luffy grimaces “That stuff is icky” he mumbles sticking out his tongue in disgust

 

“A powder which when burnt can summon rain”

 

“Which should be great, you can have all the water you need” Usopp declares, laughing until he sees Vivi’s face

 

“You’d think that, but the way Dance Powder works it basically steals the rain from other places by making the clouds drop their load early. At this point we’d been experiencing odd weather patterns and no rain had fallen at all outside the Capital”

 

“So they accused the king of using it to keep his city healthy” Ace guesses to which the princess nods

 

Exactly. And that’s not even mentioning that the production and possession of Dance Powder is illegal by order of the World government”

 

“But not it’s use?” Kaya asks in confusion

 

“If you can’t make it and you can’t own it then you can’t use it” Kaos answers

 

“Wait a minute, that means your dad is the bad guy here” Luffy declares, then runs off being chased by an angry Sanji

 

“Hm, never thought I’d see the day Sanji would defend a man” Kaos mutters

 

“Anything to get into Vivi’s princess pants” Zoro replies, causing a few of the others to chuckle, Chopper to look confused and Vivi to turn beat red.

 

“Ahem! Anyway, my father was framed, but that didn’t matter as a large amount of Dance Powder was found within the palace as well”

 

“Shit, Crocodile’s even got men inside the capital” Usopp gasps

 

“More likely Miss All Sunday does, she’s the face of the Zero Squad after all” Valentina argues

 

“The lack of rain combined with the destruction of the canal meant the city had no water, and people started to get angry. Most left to try find water in the other oasies and cities, leaving the City of Green to return to the sand” tears drip down her cheeks as she finishes her story, only looking up when a pillar collapses

 

“He’s still the same” Ace smirks as Luffy walks over with a grumpy face on

 

“Vivi let’s move, we’ve got work to do, rebels to stop and a Crocodile in need of a good ass kicking”

 

Vivi smiles slightly “Right, I can’t just stand here lost in the memories, we need to get to Yuba so I can stop the rebels”

 

“And how are you going to do that?” Alvida asks

 

“I’m going to explain what happened, how it was all Crocodile and Baroque Works doing”

 

“And he’ll believe you?”

 

“It’s my only chance”

 

 

That evening

 

“Iiiiiit’s freezing, I thought deserts were supposed to be hot” Luffy stutters, picking up Chopper like a stuffed toy and cuddling him, much to the reindeer’s annoyance

 

“You’d think that, but the lack of cloud cover means it’s blisteringly hot during the day and freezing cold because there’s nothing to hold in the heat” Vivi explains as most of their convoy huddle around the fire or Chopper. The exceptions to this were Ace, being made of fire he was immune to heat and able to raise his internal temperature in order to ignore the cold, as well as…

 

“Do you think if we put food on his hat we can get him to cook us some supper?” Ace opened one of his eyes to see Artemis and Kaos with their hands rubbing together close to him, acting as if the Whitebeard Commander was a secondary campfire.

 

“What the…” Ace then chuckles “You’ve been wanting to do this since I told you my fruit’s name haven’t you Shimmer?” he asks, to which both his brother and niece (given how easily Whitebeard adopts people Ace takes after his Pops in that regard) respond with shit eating grins, which he actually preferred to any poor attempts at innocence.

 

“Well we’re in the desert…”

“And it’s cold, but you’re made of fire…”

“So we assumed you’d be okay with sharing the warmth”

 

Ace rolls his eyes “And you didn’t think to just ask me?”

 

“Nope, then you could have said no” Artemis replies without missing a beat

 

 

“Besides you need to use it for yourself anyway, the 2 of use are just mooching of you like we used to mooch off Dadan”

 

Ace smiles, remembering the bandit, before punching Kaos in the jaw “You may be smart one, but you’re also the bonkers one” he says tiredly “Oh and fort eh record, you can use me as your campfire, just don’t touch me” he pushes his hat over his eyes and drifts to sleep

 

 

After nearly getting killed by scorpions and a sandstorm (Vivi forgetting to inform anyone of these dangers beforehand) the group continued on their journey, trudging through the desert (which the expected amount of complaining from Luffy) before settling for a break in the first bit of shade they found in a while. Now he wasn’t dying of heatstroke Luffy was bored again, so when he heard weird croaking he went to investigate and was shocked by what he saw

 

“Guys you need to come see this!”

 

“What did you break now Luffy?” Valentina groans as the group head over to him

 

“I found these birds, they don’t look too good”

 

**_CRUNCH SNAP_ **

 

“Hey Chopper can you see if this thing has any diseases, cause if it doesn’t maybe we can have Sanji or Ace cook it, it’s not much but it should stop Luffy eating all our supplies for a little longer” Kaos asks, tossing the bird to the reindeer, nearly getting flattened by it if he hadn’t jumped out of the way, all the time unaware of the scared shitless expression on the remaining birds faces

 

“Broken neck, body isn’t even cold, but it’s a desert so that may be normal” Chopper diagnoses “Probably safe to eat”

 

“Hey all those birds are flying away” Luffy whines, the feathered bandits clearly deciding robbing these pirates wasn’t worth their lives and left as quickly as possible “Come back you all look injured”

 

Vivi walks over to the amused reflect human “Hey Kaos” he turns “I think YOU are what killed that bird. Not that I’m complaining, we’re more likely to survive without those birds trying to steal out belongings, but I just thought you should be aware” he shrugged and Vivi helped set up lunch, that really being all she wanted to say on the matter.

 

Luffy being Luffy the idiot managed to get himself lost within 2 minutes of nobody watching him, leading to another 10 minutes of cursing his name and trying to figure out where he went… when he shows up riding a camel and being chased by a giant purple lizard

 

“Damn it Luffy, you keep causing trouble everywhere you go” Sanji complains, Zoro not far behind the blond as they run out to save their captain

 

“Hey guys, want to help kill it?”

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

**Oni Giri**

**Mutton Shot**

 

 

“You know, when all 3, or even just 2 of those guys team up, I almost feel bad for whatever they’re fighting” Kaya muses, Alvida nodding while she chuckles

 

“Yeah, almost” she agrees, before rumbling shakes them out of their reprieve

 

“I guess none of you knew these guys hunt in pairs?” Vivi asks, getting a resounding yell of NO!!!! from everyone

 

“Well, guess the monster trio aren’t the only ones who get to cut loose today” Victor says with a smile, mirrored by Kaos and Ace

 

“This is bigger than anything back home, think you can take it?” Kaos teases, his fingers extending through his armour

 

“I could ask you the same question” Ace replies his arm igniting in preparation

 

**Double nose fancy**

**Homunculus**

**Fire Fist**

 

Victor’s explosions stunned it, Kaos’ finger spikes pierced its brain case and Ace charbroiled it just to be sure to be sure.

 

“Hey Vivi, can we eat this?” Luffy asks, remembering what happened with the scorpion so wanted to be sure, but Vivi was still a little broken seeing the top predator of the island being killed so easily… TWICE!

 

“Hey guys, what are we going to do with this camel?” Usopp asks, looking at the grumpy thing in front of him, until Chopper happily bouces over and begins talking to it

 

“Hey Chopper, you know this guy?” Luffy asks

 

“Yep, he helped me when I got lost back in the other town. He’s friendly and helpful”

 

“Yay free camel ride” Luffy cheers, trying to get onto the animal’s back only for it to bite him on the head and shove him away “Hey, you are a camel, you are meant to be ridden, so let me ride you!”

 

At this point Chopper plays translator again “I’m greatly appreciated for you saving me and all that, but I refuse to take male passengers”

 

There was a moment of silence from the reindeer as the other guys of the group beat up the camel

 

“…I’m afraid I’m much too macho”

 

**_Crunch_ **

 

The noises made by the camel cause Chopper to curl up in a ball, while the animal in question falls to the group, tears, mucus and saliva covering its face

 

“What did you just do?” Sanji asks, before Vivi steps around to the back of the animal, where Kaos was

 

“Hm, that shouldn’t have worked” she notes, causing the purplette to raise an eyebrow “With riding camels the males are gelded, usually”

 

“Then I guess I fixed a mistake” Kaos says with a shrug

 

“Any chance it grew back?” Alvida asks, Vivi actually chuckling at the idea

 

“I don’t think any animal can regrow it’s testicles, especially after the procedure is done **properly** ” she emphasises the last word to an amused Kaos

 

“Sanji could if Nami told him she’d sleep with him” Zoro mutters, earning sniggers from Victor, Alvida and Ussop, as well as a foot to the face from said cook.

 

“Still, a free ride is a free ride” Nami shrugs before jumping onto eyelash’s back “Come on Whoa!” the ginger yelps as Artemis is dropped on her lap by Kaos before she could offer the spot for Vivi “Hey, what’s the big idea?”

 

“Artemis is a child, you’re just lazy” he replies, confident Nami wasn’t going to get off the camel to hit him, and risk losing her spot to one of the other girls. He was right, as Nami just grumbled before placing Artemis on the seat behind her.

 

The crew had to take a minor detour when they ran into some sand pirates, but nothing much happened other than meeting some bitch with a grudge against Vivi, that and losing Ace for a couple hours. The sand pirate’s captain, a large man with an umbrella on his head was nice enough to give them a lift to just off from a small village called Edo, so that was nice of him.

 

“Hey guys” everyone stops for a moment before seeing it to be Ace riding some kind of lizard waddling towards them

 

“Oh, so that’s where he went” Luffy wonders, then is promptly distracted by the food and water his brother was hauling “Yay stuff!”

 

“Yep, dig in, there’s stuff for everyone”

 

Sanji smiles “This should keep us going another while, at least as long as we stop Luffy eating everything”

 

“We’ll just put him back under the cactus juice if need be” Kaos replies with a shrug, getting slaps on the knee from Chopper and Kaya “I’m kidding, don’t want to risk the idiot OD’ing on that crap”

 

Vivi walks up to Ace, tentatively “Ace, I’m fairly sure you didn’t use money to obtain these good, but please tell me you didn’t steal from these people, who are struggling to get by as it is?”

 

Ace laughs “Nah that’s not my style, besides that village over there doesn’t appear to be exactly struggling. Not important anyway, I was given it by the rebel army” Vivi’s yell caused more than a few of the straw hats to either spit take or choke on their food/water “Well I suppose it’s not exactly the right term, more fake rebels, it’s quite a good system too”

 

“Wait, how can there be fake rebels?” Usopp asks confused

 

“Simple really, they say they’re rebels and the village hires them to protect the village something the actual rebels may do. It’s not that hard, you look tough, have the confident swagger and you’re golden. Like I said I think the idea is quite smart”

 

Nami doesn’t look convinced “But it can’t be that simple, surely someone would have figured it out or they’d have been found out by now”

 

“Not necessarily” Victor answers “Knowing a village, settlement or even an island is under someone’s protection can scare away small time bandits, knowing it’s the rebel army, who are strong enough they’re giving the royal army themselves trouble and that keeps most of the others away. It’s like how only the stupid attack islands that are Warlord bases, like Crocodile in Alabasta or Doflamingo in Dressrosa, you know there’s something big and powerful there to kick you to the curb”

 

“Exactly, so let’s just let it go and head to your destination, you are on the clock after all” Ace suggests to the now silent Vivi

 

“You want to do something, don’t you?” Alvida asks with a smirk

 

“If they’re actually doing their job they can call themselves whatever they want, but that’s the problem, we don’t know if they would actually protect the village they’re squatting in”

 

Kaos sighs while Artemis smirks from Eyelash’s back “You want to test their resolve don’t you? _Idiot_ ” he asks with a groan, mostly when she nods enthusiastically in response “Fine but don’t be disappointed when this goes tits up”

 

_ 20 minutes later _

 

The rebels, step out of the city gates, intending to run as soon as they had the chance, only to almost walk right into Luffy, his expression serious for the occasion, behind him were Kaos and Alvida, with Sanji, Usopp, Zoro and Chopper flanking them.

 

_“Shit there’s nowhere to run”_

 

Prepare to be defeated dastardly pirates, by the invincible rebel army” the town’s mayor yells from the top of the gates

 

“What a fat man, are we sure this island is experiencing a famine?” Kaos mutters, Alvida biting her lip to stop a chuckle

 

“So according to the bowling ball you guys are the real deal, guess that means it’s time to fight” Luffy deadpans

 

There was much heming and hawing before their apparent leader steps forward “Sure you cn try fight us, but there’s much more than 4, guarding this village are 100,000,000!”

 

“100,000,000!” Luffy screams, till he gets face planted by Kaos and Alvida

 

“Idiot, this is the same trick Usopp used on us, it’s only slightly less moronic because he’s that desperate” the reflect human growls

 

“Oh yeah” Luffy claps, breaking character for a second before he frowns “Lie to me you bastards!”

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

Luffy’s attack shoots the blond leader of the group through the door and part way down the path into the village, the man just lying there while the others panic

 

“This was a bad idea” Valentina comments from behind the rock the rest of the Straw Hats were observing from behind

 

“Yeah, but until Vivi gives the go ahead we have to let it play out, captain’s orders” Victor reminds her

 

The lemon girl frowns “I hate that pirate rule” she grumbles to Artemis’ amusement

 

Kaos ruffled through his cloak and pulls out a pocket watch “How long did Vivi say we needed to play this game?”

 

Alvida shrugs “Until something happens. I don’t think we needed to be here, never mind the other 4, Luffy is dealing with them just fine” Kaos nods, though as the only other crewmates with bounties it helped raise the stakes and see just what would happen.

 

Seeing as they weren’t in any rush (it’s not like they have to be anywhere or something) Luffy casually strolled over to the rest of the rebels, stepping into what would be considered normal melee range and drew back his fist…. Only for the oldest to catch it. He looked pretty bruised and his nose was bleeding badly but he was standing and looked a lot more ready to fight than he did a minute ago.

 

“I’ll admit we’re not rebels, we said we were so we wouldn’t be starving any more. We wish we could become as strong as our heroes, but we’re just thugs and cowards. You may be able to beat us to a pulp, but I’m done running, I’m going to give those kids someone to look up to” he says, putting as much of his heart into his words as he still could.

 

Luffy blinks, then smiles “I believe you” he says then turns and yells “Hey Vivi, I think this village is safe with these guys guarding it, can we go now?”

 

“IDIOT!” Vivi and Nami yell, popping out of cover

 

“Is the show over, can we head to Yuba now?” Artemis asks as she walks over to a laughing Kaos and sniggering Alvida, Usopp and Chopper

 

“yeah I think we’re done, get up you’ve spent long enough on pervert camel, your mother will kill me if she finds out”

 

Artemis laughs as she climbs on his back, not telling him about the eye on the wall in front of them. With a small wave they head off after Luffy, currently being chased by an angry ginger and bluenette _‘Too late papa she saw everything’_ she thinks with a smile, resting her head on his shoulder, waving to Ace when he finally catches up to them.

 

TBC

 

LW: I didn’t think it would happen this quickly, but my pattern of using about 3-4 episodes to make each chapter from may be coming around to bite me in the ass soon enough. Until then oh well.

 

R&R


	32. Filler and Yuba

LW: The problem with how long it’s been since I saw early One Piece, is I don’t know what’s filler and what’s important until I rewatch the episodes. Such as the last couple chapters. Oh well, hopefully the story is still interesting for you guys.

 

Rubber King and Mirror – Filler, and Yuba (Aka desert chapter no. 2)

 

The next stage of their journey was uneventful, other than the usual ruckus Luffy Sanji and this time Usopp caused, which was why Vivi decided to help pass the time with a story which turned out to be rather important in the end.

 

They learnt that the rebel leader Koza was a childhood friend of Vivi’s, which some assumed was the reason she believed that she could talk sense into the man. Luffy had his patented ‘ _don’t give a shit_ ’ expression which usually followed someone giving a back-story, though he was soon distracted by what turned out to be a giant desert scorpion, something which also turned out to be much tastier than expected once Mera Mera flame grilled.

 

“Are you sure we’re going the right way?” Kaya asks while they watch the tri daily fight over food, this time Zoro getting involved because Luffy stole his food

 

“The best we can do is follow Vivi’s directions, it’s not like anyone else in this group had even been to Alabasta before now” Kaos answers, getting shrugs from Ace and the former baroque works teams

 

“I’ve been here before, just not Yuba. Mama works in Rainbase” Artemis adds, Kaos making a mental note to go there when they were done, if their search for Crocodile didn’t lead them there first

 

“Hey look, flying meat” Luffy yells

 

“Oh no he caught us”

“Run Chip”

 

“Cool it talks too, get back here meat!” Luffy immediately runs off, to the confusion and annoyance of his crew

 

“I don’t think it’s possible, but has he gotten dumber since I left?” Ace asks, getting a shake of the head from the remaining brother

 

“He’s as impulsive as ever, which while resembling stupidity, isn’t” he replies before standing up and beginning to walk in the direction Luffy just disappeared in

 

“He’s gone” a young boy sighs

 

“Yay, real meat, we never get this kind of food in the badlands”

 

“True, so eat it slowly 10 days without food means stuffing your face is a bad idea”

 

“The badlands huh?”

 

“Can I have some of the meat if you’re not going to eat it all?”

 

The boys tense before turning to see Kaos sitting on the rock behind them, and Artemis sitting cross-legged beside them (How she got there, they weren’t sure)

 

The older looking boy gulps and draws a pistol “Stay back, we don’t want any trouble but I will us this if I have to” he stutters

 

“You’re rude” Artemis pouts, reaching for her brush but Kaos waves it off

 

“You know, I have a rule of not letting people try to threaten me” he states flatly

 

“Then come and gggget it” says, pulling the trigger as his younger brother tackles him

 

_Ping_

 

“Word of advice, only fire at something you can hit” Ace critiques as he makes himself known as well as drawing the others to his location

 

“He deflected the bullet with a rock, just how strong is he?” the smaller boy gasps, shuddering, but the older one rushes over

 

“Please help us mister I need you to find someone for us. Do this and I’ll even pay you, 1 million beri” he pleads

 

“1million?” Nami asks with a raised eye brow

 

“Where would a kid get that kind of money?” Alvida asks curiously, seeing Vivi shrug out the corner of her eye

 

“Please, I can’t give it to you all at once, but once I’m a grown up I’ll do it” he then pulls out a photo from his pocket “I need you to find this man. He’s a bounty hunter, the name’s Scorpion”

 

Zoro looks suspiscious “What’s a couple of kids looking for a bounty hunter for?”

 

“Doesn’t matter, I’m looking for this guy too, he’s the reason I was heading to Yuba but if he’s out here then that just makes things easier” Ace replies, accepting the job

 

“We’re going on another detour aren’t we?” Artemis mumbles, oddly enough getting a nod from Chopper in response.

 

“So, how the fuck are we going to find this guy?” Valentina complains “The desert is huge and there are basically no landmarks, we’ve not even made it to Yuba”

 

Turns out finding someone isn’t that hard when they’re also actively seeking you out, as was discovered when Scorpion showed up on an ostrich, alongside Luffy

 

“Hey guys, this old guy just gave me a lift on his bird”

 

“LUFFY YOU IDIOT!” was yelled in stereo by almost everyone involved

 

“So, do you think you can fight in an honourable battle pirate?” Scorpion asks, charging at Ace with his ostrich

 

“Remember this is serious, so don’t pull any punches or it’ll be boring” Luffy cheers

 

“I wasn’t planning…. Ah forget it” Ace sighs and steps forward just as Scorpion shoots a net him, the Commander actually seemed amused, letting the net envelop him before using his fruit power to produce a strong enough fireball to send it back at the man, knocking him off his bird and causing him to roll around in pain from the hot corded net.

 

“Damn, well I guess you have some skills, and if it were easy it wouldn’t be any fun” Scorpion laughs, pulling out his next gadget

 

“You’ve got some skills yourself, if I weren’t a Logia that might have been a small problem” Ace compliments, then dodges a blast of foam which tore a hole through the rock behind him

 

“This compressed air extinguisher foam blaster should do the trick, no problems” he laughs and continues to fire at Ace who dodges every shot before burying his fist in the man’s gut, knocking him to the ground.

 

Ace frowns “You lied didn’t you? You never beat Blackbeard, you just said you did so I’d come looking for you?”

 

Scorpion wheezes “Correct, but while you’re here I’m going to take you down…”

 

“Father stop he’ll kill you” one of the boys scream, stopping everyone in their tracks

 

“Did he say”

“Father?”

“Explains why these kids know a bounty hunter”

“He’s their dad”

 

Scorpion grimaces “Don’t worry boy’s I’ll be fine”

 

“Stop the fight” one of the boys yells as they both slide down the dune to their father “Please stop, we don’t want to lose you”

 

“We understand what you’re trying to teach us now, but we want you to stop before it kills you, we want you to be safe”

 

Scorpion sniffles as he pulls himself to his feet “I need to do this, to show you what a man can do when he doesn’t give up on his dreams” he clicks and Popo brings over a bazooka, which he points at Ace and lights “This ends here” he announces with all the confidence he can muster, until he feels small arms on his legs

 

“Please Dad just come home, that’s all we want that’s our dream”

“I want to go home, I’ll never complain again I just want you back, that’s all I want”

 

Seeing his boys cry broke the resolve he was clinging to, droping his weapon her pulls the 2 into a hug, unfortunately when he dropped it the bazooka went off, shooting it’s projectile into the structure behind them, causing it to fall towards them, they were nearly killed except…

 

**Fire Fist**

 

Ace jumped forward, his attack either knowing away or outright destroying any falling rubble in this path. There was shock and awe from some of the spectators, but Chip and Dip were more worried about their dad.

 

“Hey old guy, you still alive?” Luffy asks with his usual bluntness, getting a sigh from beneath the man’s hat before he pulls himself to his knees

 

“Of coure I am, you think I’d leave my kids to fend for themselves? Ha” he laughs before being tackled by the boys, happy they would be going home and that their dad would be okay.

 

_ A little later _

 

“Are you sure you have to leave?” Luffy asks with a frown, most of the others just and unhappy to see him go, mostly because it meant they were stuck with Luffy

 

Ace nods sadly “Yeah, Blackbeard’s not in Alabasta which was the reason I was tagging along on your trek. Luckily Scorpion heard news that bastard has been spotted westward, so that’s my next destination. Hold onto that Vivre Card Lu, and remember to call when all this is over sparkles, hopefully I’ll have this situation dealt with and be back on the Moby Dick soon enough” the brothers hug, promising to be even stronger pirates when they next meet and Ace leaves, using his powers to make light work of the desert now he was going solo

 

_ The next day _

 

“Anyone else miss Ace? Especially now we’re stuck with just these 2?” Sanji asks, but before anyone can reply Kaos and Luffy punch him into the sand Nami style

 

“Hey Vivi” Nami calls, ignoring the guys fighting “How much further”

 

The bluenette smiles as she turns “Just a little more, Yuba is basically right over there we just need to hold on a little longer” she declares, getting cheers from a good portion of the crew

 

“Finally, I have sand in places I really don’t want” Valentina complains

 

“Too much information” Usopp grumbles, then has to run away from an angry lemon girl

 

“Well ay least it’s motivating him to keep moving” Kaya says to Chopper with a tired smile, which the reindeer returns

 

A little later Luffy was complaining again “Come on, are we there yet? Is that Yuba?” he asks, pointing off into the distance

 

Vivi frowns “Something’s not right….. oh shit! The entire area is being struck by a sandstorm” she yelps

 

“Another one, are they common here?” Alvida asks

 

“Alabasta? Yes. The Yuba region? No they’re quite rare, making this all the more unnerving”

 

By the time they reached the town the storm had luckily dissipated, but the trail of destruction was clear

 

“This place looks just as bad as the last town we’ve come across” Zoro grumbles

 

“Well I doubt it’s all the easy for a town of this size to get through a sandstorm without ending up looking like a shithole by the end. And given the current climate on the island I get the feeling things are much harder for everyone, and recovery much slower” Kaos retorts, luckily both were far enough away from Vivi she didn’t respond to them directly

 

Luffy frowns as he scans the horizon “Water! Where’s the water? They said they’re be water!”

 

“While I only do this rarely I have to agree with the idiot, isn’t this place supposed to be an oasis or something?”

 

Vivi nods “Yes, but it seems even this oasis has been lost, either buried or just dried up”

 

The 1st option looked more likely when they noticed an old man digging, or more when he noticed them “Hello, you travellers must be exhausted from travelling in the desert heat. As you can see this town is quite parched as well, but that doesn’t mean you can’t stay here and rest, I don’t turn away those in need” he says politely “There are plenty of places to stay, Yuba prided itself on its inns and hospitality don’t you know?”

 

Vivi’s eyes glistened as she pulled up her collar “Thanks, but we’re looking for the rebel army…”

 

That was clearly the wrong this to say as the old man got angry and started throwing things at the group. The anger then moved form him to the pirates when he informed them the rebels were gone, had been for a while.

 

“Do you know where they are?” Vivi asks hopefully

 

The man shakes his head “Those idiots could be anywhere now. With no rain in 3 years the desert began to change, sandstorms became for common and this town was hit with many. Eventually our oasis was lost and the town became what you see before you. With nothing of value left the rebels packed up and left for other places most of them in Katorea, now it’s just me here.”

 

Luffy notices Vivi look faint “Um, is Katorea close to here Vivi?”

 

She shakes her head “No, it’s near Nanohana, where we first made land, we’d be quite literally going back the way we came”

 

The old man pulls himself from his pit “Vivi? Is that you?” he asks, causing the collective thought of _‘ah fuck!’_ to pass through everyone bar Vivi herself, who looked confused “It’s me Vivi, I’ve seen better days and I’ve lost a lot of weight but it’s so good to see you again” he tears up but smiles brightly, causing the bluenette to gasp

 

“Toto? It’s can’t be” she whispers, remembering a fat man with a jolly smile, like Santa but minus the beard, the moustache was the way it had been all those years ago but the almost skeletal man was very different than what she’d have expected.

 

Toto smiles “Hello my princess, it does me the world of good to see you once more. I know whatever has happened, it wasn’t you or the king’s fault, he was a good man, he’d have never done this to his people” he says, tears slipping down his cheeks, matched by Vivi’s own face “I believe in the king, most people do, but these rebels are stirring things up and making everything worse. What’s more, they’ve reached a limit in power and know this is there last chance, their next attack will be their last: victory or death” Vivi whimpers “Please princess, end this madness, please” Toto collapses to the ground and cries

 

“Toto my friend, don’t worry” Vivi says, placing her hand on his shoulder “We’re going to fix this, on my honour I swear it”

 

TBC


	33. Crocodile here we come

LW: Here we go, time to meet the true enemy of this arc, face to face.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Crocodile here we come!

 

“Hey old guy, where’s the water, I still see no water” Luffy complains “How can you live here it’s really bad”

 

Toto sighs and stops digging “I’m still here because the oasis of Yuba still exists even if it is buried under all this sand. I won’t let it break me I’ll dig up this sand and make my village liveable again if it’s the last thing I do”

 

“Oh. Well in that case, lets get rid of all this sand and get us some water” Luffy cheers, Vivi and Toto look surprised, but happy the crew were trying to help so genuinely “And I have a great plan too Shishishi”

 

Nami groans “Run it by us first, you’re not exactly a strategist Lu”

 

“I just need Kaos, Victor, Valentina and some rope. You still got any Nami?” the navigator sighs deeply before pulling out several feet of rope from wherever.

 

“Well Zoro’s not part of your plan so you’re not simply digging it out. What are you playing at then?” Usopp asks in confusion

 

“Same here, I understand Victor’s being part of this plan, me and Val not so much” Kaos adds

 

“I know how strong you are and you’re the tallest here. I need you to throw Valentina really high” Luffy explains, stretching his arm straight up

 

“This is insane, also why did you need the rope?” Vivi asks, hoping the answer made more sense than what she believed his plan to be

 

“She’s a Devil Fruit user duh. If all goes right we’ll have water, but that means she’ll sink to the bottom if we don’t have a way to get her back” Luffy explains “Now let’s make sure the first part works… Victor”

 

**My nose fancy cannon**

 

“Awesome big hole” Luffy cheers “See, we need to make a big hole, then we have Valentina drop down at full power to give it that last bang!” he grins madly and oddly enough some of the others joined him

 

“As plans go, that’s not terrible” Zoro admits

 

“It could go very wrong but no point not trying”

 

Victor walks over to Kaya and hands her his gun “Just for the job, I highly doubt you regularly carry explosive rounds on your person” he jokes

 

“No, in fact before Loguetown I didn’t carry any weapons regularly”

 

“So, are we doing this?” Usopp asks, having pulled out a solid handful of his explosive pellets

 

Luffy nods “Once the hole is big enough toss her” he orders, Nami having secured her rope around Valentina’s waist, while Artemis sat between Vivi and Toto, content to watch the fireworks “Begin”

 

**Double Nose Fancy**

**Breeze breath Bombs**

**Exploding Star**

**Chi Chi Bomb**

**Gum Gum Bazooka**

 

“Looks like it’s your turn Val” Kaos offers a hand, which she plants her heel on, smiling as he gives her a leg up

 

**1kg bounce**

**10,000 kg press**

 

The resulting shockwave knocked a few of the watchers over, most notably Toto simple due to age and drought induced weakness, though Nami and Vivi weren’t far behind him. By the time they got back up, Kaos was pulling a soaked Valentina from the pit

 

Toto gasps “You-you did it! How could I possibly repay you?”

 

“Letting us have some of the water would be nice” Kaya suggests to which the old man laughs, a little harder after Nami pipes in about somewhere to sleep that wasn’t sand

 

“Of course of course, it’s the least I can do as I wouldn’t have any at all without you nice people”

 

_ The next day _

 

“I wish you the best on your travels and for the road” Toto smiles, handing a small water barrel to Luffy who grins widely

 

“Thanks old guy, we’re going to kick Crocodile’s ass and make this country somewhere good to live in again” he waves at the now once more smiling man, the rest of the crew doing the same

 

Things were quiet for about an hour, before Luffy just stopped

 

“Hey, we don’t have time for games, we need to head back the way we came and get to the rebel base to get them to stop fighting” Sanji yells, but the straw hat just continues to sit, joined by a tired Artemis and Kaos though the latter was more standing nearby curiously

 

“I quit” Luffy replies, batting aside the swirly browed cook when he tries get in his face (to the amusement of about half the crew at any other time) “Vivi, all I want to do is kick Crocodile’s ass from here to the Red Line. That’s why we’re here, because dealing with him fixes your problems. Going to Katorea and talking to the rebels won’t do much, because they’re not the real problem, HE is”

 

“The kid can be blunt as his powers sometimes” Victor notes

 

“Yeah but he does cut through everything else to get to the heart of the matter” Val retorts

 

“Luffy”

 

“You wanted things to go in such a way that nobody dies in this fight, not any citizens, not a royal or rebel or even any of us, am I right Vivi?”

 

The bluenette looks confused “Of course I want to end this fight without bloodshead and death….” She’s once more interrupted, this time by a hissing chuckle

 

“Sesese. It’s almost funny how idealistic and naïve you are Vivi. Wake up princess this is a war and people die, its already too late for everything to just be sorted with a quick chat and a how’d you do, there are already casualties, the best we can do is minimise it by taking out the root cause” Kaos states, then blinks when one of Vivi’s jewels split his cheek

 

“You bastard!” she screams before leaping at him

 

“Shouldn’t we at least try break them up?” Nami asks, not seeing the point of the fight, though Zoro and Alvida had already knocked Sanji out to stop him ‘ _defending_ ’ Vivi. Luffy shakes his head and chuckles

 

“Nah, Vivi needs this and it’s not like Kaos is taking it seriously so it’s all good” he says with a shrug and even just from what she’s seen he had a point: other than snapping the slasher Kaos didn’t even use his devil fruit powers, most likely because Vivi wasn’t a brawler like Alvida or Luffy so with the exception of a lucky shot to the kidney Kaos probably didn’t really feel like he was being attacked (especially given he grew up with Luffy,Ace and Sabo, as well as Garp’s _Training_ ). It made her think they were waiting either for Vivi to get tired or Kaos to get bored

 

There was a part of Nami that expected the fight to end with something as unsportsmanlike as a nut shot, she just didn’t expect Kaos to catch Vivi’s knee, and flip her so she was eating sand

 

“Are you done beating yourself up Vivi, you can’t save this kingdom all alone” Kaos asks, sitting in front of her while Chopper makes sure there was no severe damage done to either of them

 

Vivi sniffles, her pride more broken than anything else “What else can I do, I don’t have anything else to throw at Crocodile but myself” she grumbles, then yelps as she receives two smacks to the head “Hey!”

 

“Did the idiot make you forget the entire trip here?” Alvida asks through gritted teeth

 

“You need to let people help you Vivi, so just let us, aren’t we your friends!” Luffy shouts, hoping it would get through Vivi’s thick skull that way

 

The princess finally cracks, falling against Alvida as she cries into the older woman’s chest, as she smooth woman runs her fingers through her hair. Meanwhile Luffy smacks Kaos for being an idiot and interfering, but he just smirks and lets Artemis sit on his lap while they wait for their next move. Finally Vivi was ready to move once more, standing with a determined and serious expression on hr face

 

“There we go, game face. So… where do we find Crocodile?” Luffy asks with a shark like smile, his eyes hidden below his hat

 

“Rainbase, the casino there, it’s the owned by Crocodile and the man’s only legitimate business I could find”

 

“Technically Baroque Works is a legitimate business, mercenary companies do pop up from time to time and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially as you’re often just outsourcing shit you don’t want to do to people willing to get paid for it. The problem is simply the way it’s being used, destabilising the country and trying to start a civil war” Kaos adds as he and Artemis also stand, the other former agents nod at least in understanding if not outright agreement.

 

“Anyway” Vivi interrupts as she pulls out the map “ The good news is unlike the rebels in Katorea who are basically on the other side of the island to us, Rainbase is a little north of Yuba, about a day’s walk if I’m not mistaken” she says partly to herself as she looks for the town on the map, smiling and putting a finger on it and Yuba to prove her point

 

“Then let’s get a move on, I have an idiot who’s ass I want to introduce to my foot” Luffy jumps up and begins marching on, until he gets a tug on his pants from Artemis, having been sent over by Vivi to explain he was going in the exact opposite direction “Opps. Thanks kiddo”

 

“No problem, I don’t want to lose my silly uncle Luffy” the artist grins in a way that seemed familiar but not quite the same, but Luffy stops caring, lifts up the now squealing/giggling girl and runs after the others

 

_ Later _

 

Given it was Alivda and Valentina’s turn on Eyelash you’d be right to assume Nami was going to bitch and moan the entire trip… right until Vivi explained why Rainbase was still so full of life despite the 3 year drought: it was a gambling town, actually quite similar to Las Vegas in the real world, even surrounded by desert (Vivi didn’t say any of that, but I am to help you understand). Needless to say Nami found a lot of spare energy to continue trudging through the sand, imagining all the money she could win or steal from the people there.

 

“Hey Vivi, are we nearly there yet?” Luffy asks, now Usopp had stopped bugging him for Toto’s water, mostly because Zoro had finally gotten annoyed enough by his begging and attempts at stealing it from their captain he kicked the sniper over Eyelash.

 

“We still have a little more to go” Vivi assured Luffy who nods and keeps walking “Hey Lu”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Thanks for helping me figure out what to do, I don’t know how I’d be able to repay you”

 

“Join my crew” Luffy replies without thinking, nor looking back to see Vivi’s shocked face “Or feed us, either will do. I hope some of the people who’ve joined us on this trip stay, they’re nice people. Except the pervert camel, he can fall in a hole when all this is over”

 

“Papa, can I stay with you when you guys beat Crocodile?” Artemis asks, standing between Kaos and Victor as they walked

 

“This will come as no surprise to you, but the best answer I can give right now is… ask your mother” Kaos answers honestly, though Kaya and Chopper chuckle behind him

 

“Do you think any of the others will?”

 

Kaos laughs “Luffy hasn’t let anyone go yet, you should have seen the amount of work he put in to recruiting Nami, and she stole our ship right from under us. Not even Sanji was that difficult to have join up and besides them it was pretty easy to get everyone else on board”

 

Artemis nods “So pretty good record, sounds like we have nothing to worry about”

 

“Exactly Fufufu”

 

_ More Later _

 

“FINALLY!!!!” Was the collective yell of Luffy, Usopp, Chopper and surprisingly Nami as they reach the city of Rainbase, the boys running on ahead in search of water, while Nami was wringing her hands and chuckling as she spots the enormous casino in the centre of town.

 

Meanwhile in the Sand café Smoker, Tashigi and Lucina were sitting and waiting

 

“Do you really think the straw hats are dumb enough to attack a Warlord?” Lucina asks, though there was less contempt than the other bluenette expected

 

“Yes, Straw Hat basically announced it when we last saw them, it’s the reason they’re here in Alabasta”

 

“And you think there’s some kind of connection between them, Crocodile and the situation here in Alabasta?” Tashigi asks to confirm

 

“I don’t know what but there is something off here” he grumbles, lighting another cigar

 

“Plus there’s princess Vivi being seen associating with the crew, not a good sign and especially not something the Nefatari’s will want known publicly” Lucina adds, knowing how dragons work as well as how this will need to be covered up somehow

 

While this conversation was going on a small commotion was going on, not that the marines cared… until Smoker turned to get a drink and noticed a very recognisable hat out of the corner of his eye. He froze, alerting the other 2 that something was off, just as Luffy and Usopp feel eyes boring holes in their skulls. Pulling down the barrels they’d been chugging they look and immediately spit take at the fact there were 3 rather competent marines right there beside them

 

“Run!”

“Protect the water” Usopp and Luffy scream as they flee the scene

 

“They’re here, Tashigi alert the marines, Lucina, see what’s taking the Black Cage corp so long to meet up with us” Smoker orders before taking off

 

“On it Sir” Tashigi salutes

 

“Where is Hina, she should have been here already” Lucina scowls before seeking the wayward captain and her underlings ‘ _The idiot can’t have gotten lost can she?_ ’

 

“What are the damn marines doing here?” Luffy asks as the 2 continue to run

 

“How should I know?” Usopp argues back “Less talking more running!”

 

As the 2 get in sight of the others, Sangi sighs heavily “Well they’re back, but they’ve brought the marines with them”

 

“The marines! Then why the hell are they leading them back to us?” Nami shrieks, beginning to panic

 

“Not important right now, let’s just get out o here” Zoro retorts and the crew bolt

 

“We’re too big a group to actually sneak away” Vivi notes worryingly

 

Kaos shrugs “Then let’s split up. We’ll take the left, you guys take the right, then just keep running till they stop chasing you? Or better yet, seeing as stealth just got torched, where’s Crocodile hanging out in this place?”

 

Vivi rolls her eyes but answers “The building with the alligator on it’s roof, it’s called Rain dinners and it’s where we would have been heading had Luffy and Usopp not run off earlier. So…. All meet up there, maybe?”

 

“Anyone got a problem with that?” Victor asks

 

“Nope, see you all there” Luffy says before bouncing up into the air “Hey Smokie, bet you can’t catch me!”

 

“You cheeky little brat” Smoker growls before shifting into smoke and coiling around Luffy

 

**White plume**

**Gum Gum Balloon**

 

Luffy expands just before Smoker could tighten his grip, scattering the logia for long enough that Luffy was able to hit the ground and run off, much to the marine’s annoyance

 

As distractions go, Zoro was a little delayed not by his inability to understand directions but by running into Tashigi, luckily Alvida was around to distract the sword otaku for long enough he was able to get away

 

The team cowards (Nami and Ussop) made it to Rain dinners rather quickly as they ran as fast as possible in the hope of avoiding danger

 

Kaos managed to lose Artemis and narrowly avoid running into Lucina along with a group of marine grunts she had under her, deciding the direct approach was a good plan right about now, bumping back into Kaya on the way

 

Artemis wasn’t actually lost, she just decided to stick close to Vivi once Luffy gave the go ahead to split up, not having time to alert her papa, plus she knew Mama was around so she’d be safe.

 

The other Baroque work agents were a little apprehensive about fighting their old boss on his home turf so decided to take the long way to Rain Dinners, what this meant was they were nowhere near the casino when…

 

“Guys, just run I can’t shake this guy” Luffy shouts as he barrels towards them, Smoker a little behind but still poofing

 

“He’s called the White Hunter for a reason you know” Kaos mumbles but they all run in just as Luffy catches up to them, galloping up the steps and into the casino proper

 

After convincing Luffy just yelling wasn’t going to help the 6 of them tried come up with a plan… for about 5 seconds before they were interrupted again

 

“Straw Hat! You think I’m letting you get away that easily”

 

“Shit it’s smokie, let’s just run” Luffy orders, and unsurprisingly the other agreed, interestingly when in a panic Luffy appeared unaware he’d ploughed through the building’s security/bouncers in his mad dash to avoid Smoker, something which would have amused at least Nami and Kaos at any other time

 

“Oh Manager so glad you were there we have a bit of a situation” a grumpy looking man with pointy hair explains in a flustered tone

 

“Send them to the VIP lounge” Miss All Sunday replies with a small smirk “Crocodile’s been expecting them”

 

“Oh, of course ma’am, we would have done it already if we’d known to expect these strange people” the man nods and Robin turns her gaze to the straw hats, finding Luffy rather easily as well as the guy who reminds her of a completely different Warlord to her current Boss. They were strange, she’ll give them that much.

 

“Anyone else worried or confused right about now?” Kaos asks, as they’re now clearly being directed to the VIP lounge

 

“Yeah, this screams trap” Nami nods

 

“Worry about it later, anything that keeps us away from the marines is welcome” Usopp pipes in fearfully

 

“Don’t they give free drinks in places like this?” Zoro thinks aloud, thought clearly he’s not being listened to as they all run through the door to a plain white corridor

 

“V.I.P., Pirates. Hey let’s go that way” Luffy yells as they spot a sign just where the corridor splits

 

“Luffy this is by far the dumbest plan I’ve ever heard you come up with. How can you not see an obvious trap like that?” Nami ask/yells at him as they keep running

 

“Would you like to discuss this with Smoker?” Luffy asks in a surprisingly good deadpan

 

“Like I was saying, best plan we’ve got so full speed ahead” the thief quickly backtracks, speeding up so slightly to right behind Luffy, rather then between Ussop and Zoro. As one they turn and find… a wall. This appears to basically just be a cul-de-sac inside the building. Well until Smoker runs up behind them, then the floor opens up and they all fall into the darkness

 

“As far as traps go, a pitfall wasn’t on my list of expected outcomes”

 

Nami nods “An indoor trap hole, got to hand it to him on originality” the thief grumbles as she sits up

 

“I feel weak” Luffy mumbles, like Usopp having been pounding at the bars of their cage until a moment ago

 

“Ah crap, what’s wrong now?” Zoro sighs, then moves to stand when Smoker smacks Luffy to the ground and pins him with his jitte

 

“What the Hell, I feel so weak, it’s like being underwater” Luffy says tiredly, blinking slowly up at the marine

 

“The tip of my weapon is made of kerioseki, also known as sea prison stone. It’s a rare mineral found in a distant corner of the ocean (also known as Wano) that can weaken devil fruit users as well as negate some of their strengths”

 

“Such as you actually winning by fighting Luffy with a blunt object” Kaos guesses “Or being able to hit someone like you while in your element” he adds with a smirk

 

Smoker growls but nods “Correct. All marine cells are made with this material to stop Devil Fruit users from escaping”

 

“Which means you’re stuck with us too” Nami gasps, realising what Smoker wasn’t telling them

 

He frowns “It’s the only reason I’m still in here and you aren’t all being carted off to the nearest execution platform, as I doubt you’re worth the trip to Marineford”

 

Crocodile raises an eyebrow at the catch _‘It can’t be that easy’_ he thinks as he looks at the captured Straw Hats, and Smoker, especially as none of them have noticed his prescience

 

Zoro grits his teeth and reaches for his swords, Kaos doing the same with Hebi, feeling it coil around his arm.

 

“Stop it right now you idiots, this is a bad time to fight, plus what good will a sword do against someone who can turn into smoke?” Nami asks both angrily and fearfully

 

“She’s right” Crocodile’s rough voice pierces the air “You’re all going to die together, there’s no need to kill each other so soon” the chair turns with a creek, revealing the smirking War Lord to the group, the man unsurprised by the matching scowls on most of their faces.

 

“Crocodile, come closer so I can kick you asaaaaa” Luffy flops onto his back, having grabbed the bars in his anger

 

Crocodile chuckles, the boy’s stupidity was quite entertaining “You’ve done well to make it this far Straw Hat, and for that I’ll make sure your death is swift, as well as the rest of your crew. Once our special guest arrives that is”

 

“Guest?” Kaya asks, whimpering when Crocodile’s focus turns to her, as well as his smile

 

“Why even as we speak my partner is out there retrieving her, shouldn’t be too much longer”

 

_ Meanwhile outside Rain dinner  _

 

Vivi was dealing with a good number of millions, especially with the assistance of Artemis, (none of the other 3 able to find the wayward princess, though they were looking) but there were just too many for the 2 of them to deal with

 

“You’re good, as to be expected from number agents, but it’s time to give up, the boss is waiting after all” one of the millions says with a leering smirk after smacking Vivi upside the head with his rifle

 

**_BANG BANG BANG BANG_ **

 

“What the fuck was that?” several millions yell as the idiot was torn apart, then spotting something in the sky

“That some kind of bird?” was asked, causing Vivi to perk up slightly, as well as hold Artemis close to avoid any crossfire

 

**RATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATA**

 

The sound of machine gun fire had the edge of her lips curl upwards, but it was when the bird came into view it became an actual smile

 

“It’s a falcon”

“A fucking huge one”

 

The bird paid the millions no notice as it swooped down and picked up the girls, dropping them off on the roof of a nearby building

 

“Oh Pell, you have no idea how glad I am to see you” Vivi smiles as the massive falcon changes back into one of the royal guards

 

“As I you, your father received your letter and is actually on his way quite soon to deal with Crocodile, I’m just here to scout and search for any hidden surprises” Pell explains

 

“Like Crocodile’s Devil Fruit powers?” Artemis asks getting a look from Pell before turning to Vivi

 

“Don’t worry about her she’s on our side”

 

“As long as you believe that, now if you’ll excuse me I need to deal with these ruffians” He then transforms again, making short work of the millions that had been harassing Vivi.

 

“The Tori Tori, model Falcon, quite impressive don’t you think Artemis?” Vivi asks the girl who shrugs

 

“Devil fruits are Papa’s thing, just like the void is mama’s and mine is art. Do you think there’s an Art Art fruit somewhere in the world?”

 

“I don’t know, like you said your papa’s the best person to ask that” Vivi answers then turns to look down at Pell “Thank you for the help, but I need to meet up with the others and fix things”

 

“Leaving so soon?” A voice purrs in her ear, causing Vivi to leap back when she sees Miss All Sunday right behind her

 

“Miss All Sunday” she curses, causing the older woman to raise an eyebrow before her grin widens

 

“Time to meet the Boss Vivi, it’s rude to keep him waiting”

 

At this point Pell turns and sees the oddly dressed woman with Vivi and Artemis “And who might you be?”

 

All Sunday smiles “You’re quite the enigma, having one of the Devil Fruits that enable flight as a service rather than an exploit. But still, do you think you can beat me?”

 

Pell frowns “That isn’t an answer but I’m going to assume you’re part of Baroque Works, in which case I will not allow you to harm the princess”

 

‘ _This may get messy’_ Artemis thinks, having seen just how vicious All Sunday can be, though that usually requires her to be very annoyed or in a rush.

 

**Tres Fleur**

 

Arms sprouted from the falcon human’s body, 2 pinning his wings together while the 3rd ensured his sword wasn’t making an appearance in this fight. The resulting metaphorical wing clip meant Pell crash-landed on the roof rather than cutting down Sunday

 

“Didn’t see that coming did you Birdie?” Sunday teases as she uncrosses her arms

 

“You ate a Devil fruit, it’s the only explanation” Pell wheezes

 

“Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner. I ate the Hana Hana no mi, which enables me to bloom body parts like flowers. You can’t escape my reach even in the air, so it might be best to just let us go”

 

“Never, I won’t let you kidnap Alabasta’s princess without a fight” he yells before charging with his sword, aimed for her heart

 

“Silly man”

 

**Seis Fleur**

 

Vivi gasps as Sunday’s bloomed arm’s lock Pell in place, 2 around his neck, 1 for each arm and another coming out of the ground to grab his ankles

 

“Power, speed, these mean nothing to me, once you are within my grasp you are done. I’m sure I said this before but we’re in a little bit of a hurry, don’t want the Boss to think the country has a rude princess Tweety Pie. So let’s get this over with”

 

**Seis Fleur: Clutch**

 

Vivi whimpers when she hears the crunch of Pells spine, the greatest warrior in Alabasta defeated by a woman who clearly wasn’t even trying.

 

“Time to go princess, I won’t be made wait any longer. Coming Goldenweek?”

 

“Of course Miss All Sunday” Artemis replies, hopping up and following the women towards Rain Dinner

 

TBC

 

LW: So, how are our heroes going to make it out of this one? Well see yah in 2 weeks

 

Miss All Sunday/Nico Robin – Eater of the Hana Hana no mi/Bloom Bloom fruit

Tres Fleur: Blooms 3 arms on the opponent’s body,

Seis Fleur: Blooms 6 arms on or around her opponent, locking up their limbs and preventing attack of even movement really

Seis Fleur Clutch: Uses her bloomed arms to snap the spine of the enemies

 

Pell – Eater of the Tori Tori no mi: Model Falcon/ Bird Bird Fruit: Model Falcon


	34. Sand, Gators and a prince?

LW: Okay here we are once again, tiny bit later than normal sorry about that. I tired, but this was as much content as was going to be shoved into this chapter, hope you still enjoy it.

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Sand, Gators and a prince?

 

“Nami can you calm the fuck down already, you might actually annoy this guy if you keep running your mouth like that” Kaos sighs deeply, the ginger hadn’t stopped yelling at Luffy and Usopp since they couldn’t find an escape root and decided to pass the time goofing off, and he could clearly see a twitch developing in Croc’s left eye. It meant he was just as glad as the rest of them when the door to the chamber opened.

 

“Ah Miss All Sunday, glad you finally joined us” Crocodile smiles around his cigar as the woman enters, along with Vivi (her arms pinned behind her back) and Artemis

 

“We would have been quicker, but someone was being difficult” Miss All Sunday drawls

 

“Sorry Mr. 0, I wanted another cake” Artemis says with a half smile

 

“Miss Goldenweek, it’s been too long” Crocodile chuckles “And no need to stand on ceremony, everyone here knows my real name, even you”

 

“Hello Crocodile” Artemis repeats

 

“That’s better Artemis” the straw hats tense when hey see the girl twitch/flinch, when her name passed his lips, she never reacted to any of the others “…and Miss Wednesday, how good it is to see you again. Sunday release her, she hasn’t done anything just yet and she’s our guest for the moment. So what are you going to do now?”

 

Vivi growls and jumps from the stairs, landing just in front of him “End you” she hisses, drawing a slasher and swinging it, slicing through both his neck and the back of the chair in one go.

 

“Wow, that was so cool!”

“And scary”

“Princess has balls… when she wants to”

“That was too easy”

 

“If I may interrupt?” Crocodile’s gruff voice asks, behind Vivi, the princess turns in time to see him reform from the dust… no the sand that had been lying on the floor of the basement

 

“Logia, freaking called it”

 

“He’s a sand man”

 

Crocodile smiles grimly “Correct, I ate the Suna Suna no mi, and on an island like Alabasta I’m not a just a mere king or Warlord, I’m a God”

 

He then proceeds to manhandle Vivi into the chair she’s just ruined, Sunday blooming hands to pin her shoulders and knees as well as discourge escape attempts while she tied the princess’ hands and feet.

 

“There we go, wouldn’t want you running off again now would we. Where are our plans at the moment my dear?”

 

“It’s precisely noon, Operation Utopia has begun” Sunday states with a smile

 

“Good, then it is the beginning of the end. Shame you failed so miserably princess” Crocodile chuckles as he watches her struggle

 

“What did you do? What is Operation Utopia?” Vivi yells, her features twisted with hate

 

“If you must know, as we speak Mr 2 is ensuring no one will ever believe the kind again, as well as break the final support keeping this country from falling into total anarchy. While Nanohana burns down, the country will react exactly as expected and turn on it’s ruler. The guards will fight back and so many will die. And do you know what makes this all the sweeter? That everyone fighting and dying has only one thing on their minds: **_Protect Alabasta_** , and that love for their kingdom will tear it apart at its seams. You should be happy princess, this is the only goal Baroque Works was ever leading to, your work has finally bore fruit”

 

“How can you be so heartless?” Vivi hisses

 

“CROCODILE!!!!” Luffy yells, rushing at the bars, trying to push his way out despite their mere touch weakening him “I’m. Still. Going. To. Kick. Your. Ass.” He pants

 

“There’s something wrong with that kid, didn’t he listen to what I said about the kerioseki?” Smoker sighs, getting a dark chuckle from Kaos and a reflexive sigh from Zoro

 

“Oh there’s plenty wrong with Luffy, but his stubbornness is something that hasn’t been beaten yet”

“And that never say die attitude, whether due to his stupidity or bull headedness, is why he’s our captain”

 

Crocodile rolls his eyes and dismisses the prisoners “Now as I was saying Vivi, I’ve put so much work into setting up this little rebellion: causing droughts, manipulating the rebels and the royal guards, destroying essential infrastructure. Do you have any idea why I did all of this, and why Alabasta in particular?” he asks, clearly expecting some kind of response

 

Vivi scoffs “As if I have a chance of being able to understand anything going about in your twisted mind” she sneered, the muttered ‘ _you understand papa pretty well, even if you fight_ ’ from Artemis only noticed by Sunday and Kaos. With that she rocked on her chair, toppling it and her to the ground, where she begins wriggling away, much to Crocodile’s amusement

 

“And what might I ask are you doing, besides being even more undignified than before?” he asks

 

“Taking my chances, if I can make it to Alubarna before the rebels I can still stop this, I can still foil your heinous plans. I will never give up, not as long as there is life in my body and air in my lungs” Vivi declares, shuffling harder as she does so

 

_‘Aunt Vivi is just as stubborn as Luffy, no wonder he wants her on the crew’_

 

“He won’t get away with this!” Luffy shouts, his anger still rising since reaching the island in the first place.

 

Crocodile chuckles, but otherwise ignores the rubber boy “There’s no need for these dramatics Miss Wednesday, we were on our way to Alubarna ourselves and would be happy to take you. You can come with us, or you can save your friends” at that everyone perks up slightly, Vivi looking the warlord in the eye for the first time in a while, as he pulls a key from his coat and waves in her direction

 

“The key to the cell” Vivi whispers, to which Crocodile nods slightly before releasing his hold, as well as signalling to Sunday. Just before the key hits the ground in front of Vivi (frantically trying to free herself from her restraints) the floor opens up and the key clicks against the stone far below.

 

“You don’t have much time princess, the rebels are already heading for Alubarna, if you stand any chance of intercepting them you’ll need to act fast. You can either come with me, or save your friends, and is now a bad time to mention the only key to their cell just fell into my bananagator enclosure?” Crocodile asks, enjoying the hopeless look in Vivi’s eyes, as well as the inner turmoil.

 

“Hey guys look over there, that banana has a gator growing out of it! OW” Luffy grunts as Nami slams his head into the ground, the idiot having only now noticed the animals swimming in the area surrounding the room. Attention was returned when they heard Vivi’s meep “What happened Vivi?”

 

“A bananagator just ate the key”

 

Kaos groans “It’s that damn mutt all over again”

 

“Well go get him to spit it our, we need that key more than he does” Luffy orders, getting face palms from half the group

 

Crocodile chuckles before snapping his fingers and the door in front of him swings open “Time to go we have much work to do today. Also just as a heads up this room will be destroyed in an hour, it has been useful while I was here but there’s no more need for it after today. Soon the waters of Rainbase’s lake will fill this room, killing anyone still inside. Time to make your choice my dear, your people or these pirates, though I doubt any of them have much of a future left. Are you a betting girl Vivi, because much like upstairs you need to take a chance, much like I did too, but thanks to a country of idiots like those rebels and that old skeleton in Yuba it was not much of a gamble”

 

“Toto”

“Wait you know that old guy too?”

 

“Why of course, toiling away day in and day out searching for an oasis that is long dead…”

 

“Actually we fixed that” Luffy interrupts, mostly to see Crocodile’s eye’s bulge in shock

 

“I guess I’ll have to try harder next time, bury him along with it. Tell me boy, do you know how sandstorms can hit a town with pin point accuracy repeatedly?”

 

“That was you!” Vivi accuses, her fists clenched on the ground

 

“Didn’t think we’d get proof you’re a dick as well as everything else, but it’s good to cover all your bases” Kaos deadpans with a shrug

 

“I will kill you!” Vivi screams, getting to her feet

 

Sunday chuckles “Good luck child, though the saying is 3rd times the charm” she says, just as the floor opens up, releasing the lake water into the chamber.

 

“Goodbye Straw Hats, I’d say it had been nice knowing you, but you were a pain in my ass” Crocodile gloats as the 3 leave, Vivi standing but her mind torn

 

“Oh no you don’t, face me like a man you bastard”

 

**Gum Gum Ricochet**

 

Luffy’s fist shot through the bars, bouncing off the floor of the slowly filling room and slamming Crocodile straight in the face, throwing the Warlord up against the wall

 

“Holy shit”

“Go Luffy!”

“Impossible”

“You’ve just cut our remaining time in half you idiot”

“I don’t think that’s how that works Nami”

 

Kaos and Artemis grin madly, Robin’s mouth twitches into a smirk for half a second and Vivi just stands there frozen in shock, as Crocodile pulls himself to his feet, spitting blood before sneering

 

“You got a lucky shot there Straw Hat, but at least you can die knowing you managed to strike me” he said then opening another trap door and releasing one of his bananagators “As you probably guess my dear Vivi I did plan to kill you long before you made it to the capital, but why should I wait that long when I can just kill you now and feed my pets. So long you sky haired brat” he chuckles to himself, walking around the gator with Sunday

 

“You can do it Vivi” Luffy cheers

 

“Are you crazy, that thing is massive and Vivi’s not some kind of monster like you or those 2 idiots over there” Nami yells, Kaos and Zoro shrugging at the description

 

“She only needs to beat one to get the key out and free us all, then if the others show up Me, Kaos and Zoro can deal with them as we escape” Luffy explains, almost sounding like a good plan… except

 

“Look out the window” Usopp shouts “The others are getting ready to eat us too!”

 

“That’s a lot more organised than I expected” Kaya thought aloud, seeing the massive beasts basically queuing underwater

 

“More organised than Luffy too” Zoro adds

 

Vivi smiles for a second but quickly got back into the seriousness of the situation when she was forced to dodge the gator’s lunge, the stairs suffering instead of her at their jaws, though the tail swipe that followed she was less lucky with, getting tossed across the room from the attack.

 

“Vivi! Are you alright?” Luffy asks, Vivi shakily pulling herself up, blood dripping from a cut to her face, only to get a face full of bananagator staring down at her

 

_‘So this is how it ends, I guess I won’t have to see the Hell Crocodile has in store for my country’_

 

_Puru puru puru_

 

“Wait there’s a phone down here?” was a thought mirrored by both Luffy and the gator, or at least it must have if it actually stopped trying to kill Vivi to look for the Den Den Mushi. Turned out it was Sunday’s, the trio having not gotten very far as they were acting like it was just a simple stroll

 

“Who would be calling at a time like this?” she wonders as she answers the snail

 

“Hello? Can anyone hear me?” the Den Den asks

 

“We can hear you fine, _geez how dim were some of the millions we hired_?” Sunday pinches the bridge of her nose while Artemis smiles behind her at the familiar voice as they were basically listening to a separate conversation

 

“Is this thing on?”

“Yes it’s working fine they should be able to hear you”

“Thanks, 2nd time using the snail, my old man doesn’t have one so there’s nobody I ever need to borrow it from Sparkles to talk to”

 

Crocodile sighs “We can hear you fine, state your business and get on with it we’re very busy”

 

The snail pouts, then frowns “Oh I know I’ve heard that voice before” causing Crocodile to tense “Hello there, you reached the crap café”

 

The war lord grits his teeth “I remember you, from Little Garden. How many Straw Hats are on this damn crew, we have all but the pet and the traitors from Mr.2’s descriptions, did he miss someone?” he says to himself, though Sunday notes Artemis tight grip on the back of her coat, running her fingers through her hair to try calm the girl

 

Meanwhile the others were trying to keep Luffy quiet so he didn’t do something stupid like reveal Sanji’s identity, the level to which they were would have amused Smoker very slightly at a less potentially fatal time.

 

“I’m glad you remembered, you like codenames, you can call me Mr. Prince” the voice on the other end of the line replies (Got to love 20 years of lore for little moments like this)

 

“Fine Mr. Prince, mind telling me something useful like where you are and why you’re calling?” Crocodile asks

 

“If I did that you’d probably send your men to come kill me or else come yourself. Not that I think you could, but I’m not taking that chance, I prefer not to give away information like you just did Mr 0” The snail’s smile causes a tic to form on Croc’s temple

 

“Quick save us Mr. Prince, if you don’t hurry we’re going to be gator food!”

“Come on get the lead out we need to get out of this cage right now!”

 

The Den Den chuckles “That’s my crew all right, thanks for collecting them for me Luffy and Zoro tend to get lost easily and often” Artemis suppressed a laugh while Zoro rolls her eyes, he doesn’t get lost everything just moves.

 

Things were beginning to look up when a crash was heard on the other end

 

“Not so tough no are you? Hey boss we got him, he’s not going anywhere in the condition we have him”

 

‘ _Oh no, Sanji’_ Vivi thinks, biting her lip

 

“where are you?” Sunday asks, hoping for a quick extraction

 

“In front of the building with the gator on top in Rainbase, Rain Dinners” was the reply

 

“Shit”

“If that idiot isn’t dead he’s going to wish he was” Zoro grumbles, while Luffy was working himself into a frenzy, Kaos was sitting with his head in his hands and the other 3 were panicking once more.

 

“Very good, we’ll be there soon” Crocodile ends the call, the click audible even from their distance before the snail goes back to sleep

 

“Do you think this is wise, none of the Millions know you’re the Boss?” Sunday asks as she puts away her Den Den

 

Crocodile shrugs “Aside from the number agents and those Straw Hats nobody does, to the rest of the country I’m just a local hero and casino owner. They’re causing a commotion outside my building, there’s nothing wrong with me going to see what’s happened” he explains before walking again, this time with more purpose, the 2 girls following

 

**Crash**

 

“Vivi! What are you doing?” Luffy asks, seeing the bluenette pulling herself onto the stair, which the bananagator was still wrecking in a failed attempt to get her

 

“We still have time, I’m going to go help you know who” she calls back

 

“You’re right, he can’t be dead”

“Nobody on this crew would kick the bucket that easily” Kaya and Usopp assure themselves and the others, the sniper holding their medic close

 

“Plus there’s Chopper, Alvida, Victor and Valentina, if you can find them we’ll be out of here in no time” Nami adds, feeling the slightest hint of optimism

 

Vivi smiles and nods, until she was basically tackled by a mound of sand, getting in a solid smack to her throat as it knocked her back onto the ground

 

“I’m getting tired of your continued attempts at escape” Crocodile grunts “You want to stay and help your friends, well now you get to die with them. I’ll be back with Mr Prince soon enough, I would hate to keep any of you waiting” he gloats before disappearing

 

“Come on Vivi, wake up before the banana sees you”

 

_‘They’ve been there for me this far, now it’s my turn to help’_ Vivi thinks as she slowly stands, wiping blood off her face and staring down the gator “You will now get in my way again!” The gator jumps at her, then recoils from Vivi managing to slice at it’s unarmoured tongue then jumping first onto it’s back, then the stairs “I got this guys, just hold on a little longer”

 

“Well make it quick, we’re getting closed to fucked right about now” Kaos complains, mostly because the windows had just shattered, severely increasing the amount of water being pumped into the room

 

“Right, double time” Vivi nods, running as fast as she could toward the front of Raindinners. The only problem being….

 

“The bridge is out”

 

_‘What!’_ Vivi freezes _‘If the bridge is destroyed, then I’m stuck in here’_

 

“I didn’t do it to trap you” a man says nearby, causing Vivi to turn, and smile “I did it so we wouldn’t be interrupted by any more Baroque Work thugs. You can thank Victor when we get out, he knew exactly where to hit the bridge so it would fall in one hit, finally understand the Doctor metaphor Kaos was using, knowing how to make something helps when you want to break it too” Sanji smiles and stubs out his cigarette on the slot machine he was sitting at “So Vivi, mind leading us to where our friends are?”

 

“Us?” Vivi repeats before another Straw Hat bounces into her field of view, her bosom actually filling Vivi’s

 

“We’re here to save our idiots, also did you know Crocodile could turn into sand?” Alvida asks, when Vivi’s response came out as muffled noise she took a step back and Vivi breathed a sigh of relief, after filling them with precious oxygen.

 

“I do now, would have been useful to know before attempting to decapitate someone” she grumbles, then turns on her heels and begins running back into the depths of the casino “Come on our friends don’t have much time” she yells over her shoulder, the 2 others running after her.

 

TBC

 

LW: Well Sanji and co should probably get to work quick as the others don’t have long left. Also nice to see Vivi get to be badass… or at least try to, how was she supposed to know Croc was sand?

 

Crocodile: Eater of the Suna Suna no mi/Sand Sand Fruit.

2nd Logia of the series, can turn his body into sand and absorb moisture from anything he touches.


	35. Race to Alubarna: Luffy Vs Crocodile

LW: Time to see Luffy’s 2nd attempt to fight a Logia, hopefully it goes better than his fight with Smoker in Loguetown.

 

It’s not is it? 0_0

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Race to Alubarna: Luffy Vs Crocodile

 

“So what’s stopping Crocodile from turning around and killing us?” Vivi asks as she leads Sanji and Alvida back through the casino

 

“Chopper’s running around Rain base, the little guy is tough when he wants to be, beat the ever loving shit out of the millions while proclaiming to be me, or Mr Prince I suppose” Sanji explains, though Vivi pales

 

“So you let Crocodile go after him?” Vivi yelps

 

Alvida sighs and squeezes her shoulder “Chopper just needs to keep Croc’s attention, the V’s will be around to help in that regard and it’s not like we asked him to fight the guy, just take his eyes off you and our missing crewmates” she adds, glad to see the princess relax slightly just before reaching the stairs

 

Meanwhile

 

“Fuck, how strong is this cage?” Nami cries as the bananagator’s teeth are shattered when it tried to get at it’s captive meat

 

“So, can we just assume kieroseki is some kind of magic diamond?” Kaos asks, sitting beside Smoker who actually seemed uninterested about being in a life or death situation

 

“Why are you just sitting there, you should be trying to help us out?” Usopp yells at both guys, though neither react to him directly Smoker does speak

 

“What do you know about Crocodile’s plans?”

 

“Very little, why?”

 

Smoker frowns “The woman, his 2nd in command, she’s wanted by the World Government for quite a lot, 70 mill as far as I know”

 

Luffy nods “Kaos mentioned it back at Cactus island, Nico Robin, 79 million berri, the Devil’s child. He also said if she wanted to hide all that she should wear a mask either as Robin or Sunday”

 

“Maybe she expects people to be too busy staring at her cleavage to remember her face” Zoro suggests mostly as a joke, getting a light kick (more a prod) to the back of the head by Kaos, and a more substantial smack from Nami

 

Smoker sighs “My point is that with those 2 working together this could become something the entire world gets dragged into rather than a simple internal island dispute/civil war” he finishes, pointedly ignoring Kaos coughed **_‘Buster Call’_** , though his lips turned down into the start of a scowl, which clearly amused the younger man.

 

“I don’t care” Luffy states plainly “I don’t need any more reasons than I already do, I’m going to kick that bastard’s ass just like I promised I would”

 

_‘Kid’s stupid as a sack of rocks, but he’s determined I’ll give him that’_ Smoker thinks, probably the closest Luffy will ever get to a compliment from the marine (We’ll just have to wait and see, at least we can say it’s the best for now)

 

**BANG**

**BANG**

 

“What the Fuck?!” Was the collective exclamation from the prisoners as the bananagator was thrown into the air, landing on it’s back with another slam

 

“Looks like Vivi’s back” Kaos says, standing up for the 1st time since Sunday arrived

 

“And with reinforcements” Vivi answers, smiling from the destroyed stairway as Sanji stood before them and Alvida was basically posing like a badass on top of the downed gator (DF user, water bad)

 

“Been waiting long?” She asks, hefting her mace onto her shoulder and grinning

 

“Nami my dear, do you love me now?” Sanji asks as he does his ‘ _noodle dance_ ’, causing most of the crew to sigh and Smoker to sweatdrop, this crew was insane but seriously?

 

“Damn lovesick idiot” Zoro grumbles

 

“Get us out of here and I’ll show you how much I love you” Nami replies between gritted teeth, there was a time and a place for everything, now was not the time for chivalrous pervert.

 

“Hey guys, the other gators are tired of waiting” Kaya yells as the room is now flooded with banana gators as well as water.

 

“The 3rd from the left has the key” Smoker shouts to the free Straw Hats, looking confused but considering Smoker most likely wanted out as badly as their friends follow the order, Alvida’s mace to the gut causing the reptile to spit out a white ball which bounced across the room

 

“Not a key that’s for sure” Sanji sighs

 

“You sure you’re hearing is any good Smokie?” Alvida asks, the water causing her to lean on her mace for stability

 

**Wax Wax Ball: Release**

 

The ball cracks open like an egg, a shrivelled up husk stepping out of it

 

“Hey it’s that wax guy from the dinosaur island, what’s he doing here?” Luffy thinks aloud, as the entire group frown

 

“Mr. 3” Vivi growls

 

After drinking his fill Mr. 3 stands up happy as could be “Sweet freedom, Crocodile though he could kill me, but he didn’t try hard enough” it as then he noticed his surroundings “Not you again!” he shrieks, then looks confused as he finds the key sitting in the remains of his wax ball _‘Hmm?’_

 

“Toss it here”

“Give us the key”

“Don’t make me hurt you”

 

_‘A room quickly filling with water, trapped straw hats, and this key? Interesting’_ Mr. 3 grins “Well my dear Straw Hats I guess it’s time for me to go…” he grunts as he walks into Sanji

 

“Hey, I’ll be taking that key now” the cook demands

 

3 frowns, looking from Sanji to the key and back a couple times “You want this key? Go get it!” he yells, tossing the key into the water, somewhere in the middle of the gator mass “I don’t know who you are but if you’re with the Straw Hats you’re clearly an enemy of mine”

 

**Homunculus**

**Bonebreaker**

 

Mr. 3 shrieks as a spiked finger pierces his left knee and Alvida crushes his right foot, then wraps her hand around his throat so he was looking her in the eye “I’m going to enjoy breaking every bone in your body you wax spewing little shit” she growls, the look in her eyes familiar to anyone who tragically passed in Whiskey Peak.

 

“Sanji, save the key!” Luffy yells, the blond nods and runs towards the hungry gators

 

“Hold it!” Kaos shouts “There’s an easier way” he adds, and just as he hoped that was enough to interest the cook as well as the rest of the crew “If Alvida can hold off on murdering Waxy over there, I believe he could be of use to us… as in using his fruit to make us a key”

 

Alvida grins, which sends a shiver down Smoker’s spine _‘You only met Vice Admiral Medusa once, how can her smile still get this reaction out of me?’_

 

“You heard him Waxy, make them a key and I might just spare you” she growls in his ear, the numbered agent just barely managing to keep bladder control before Sanji drags him over to the door

 

“Good, now we can leave” Nami cheers as Mr. 3 frees them, just before the man gets kicked into the wall by Sanji, probably more likely to survive that than whatever Alvida had planned for him

 

“One problem, the room is still full of banana…” Vivi doesn’t even get to finish her sentence when she’s interrupted by

 

“Done!” A surprisingly chipper Kaos announces as himself Zoro and Luffy deal with the remaining gators almost effortlessly

 

“Never mind let’s go then!” Usoop says with a grin, taking Kaya’s hand in his own he leads the way to the door, the blond behind him just as happy to be free.

 

That happiness lasted about 5 seconds, after which the passageway collapsed as well as most of the room

 

_‘This is going to suck’_ Luffy and Kaos groan as the wave of water barrels towards the group, sweeping them out into the lake.

 

What feels like minutes but was much less

 

Sanji grunts as he surfaces, pulling himself as well as both Luffy and Alivda to shore “Damn it, you 2 alive? I’m really not understanding the appeal of Devil Fruit powers right now” the cook grumbles to himself

 

“Come on Usopp, don’t die on me now” Kaya whimpers, checking on her currently unconscious friend

 

“For such a big guy I think his coat is most of this weight” Nami complains as her and Vivi ended up pulling Kaos onto dry land, the purplette moans weakly and rolls onto his back

 

The last one to surface was Zoro, along with…

 

“You stupid marino in case you forgot that’s our enemy!” Sanji reprimands, but is ignored by the swordsman

 

“I didn’t want to save him, but I wasn’t going to just let the man die” Zoro retorts in defence “I’d have no problems cutting him down in a fight, but this leaving him to drown would have been just plain wrong”

 

“So everyone’s alive right?” the non devil fruit users jump at the voice behind them, turning to see Artemis slowly walk over to Kaos and sit by his head “You going to get up now Papa?” she asks, getting a weak chuckle, water in her face and a cough that turned into a chuckle

 

“Just need a minute, damn slave driver”

 

“If she was a real slave driver you wouldn’t get that minute”

 

Vivi smiles despite the circumstances “Victor, Valentina, Chopper, glad to see you all survived”

 

“You too it would seem” the bomb man laughs

 

“Roronoa!” Zoro reflectively raises Wado, blocking Smoker’s jute handily “Why did you save me?”

 

The swordsman shrugged “Captains orders, plus it didn’t feel right” he confessed, noticing the marine captain’s frown deepen

 

At this point Luffy and Usopp jump up mostly alright, Alvida sits up and with minor encouragement Kaos stands up and wrings out his cloak over Nami and Artemis (Just because he’s kind of a dick sometimes)

 

“I should arrest you, but you’ve just saved my life” Smoker sighs deeply, returning his weapon to his back “On that note, just this once I’m letting you go. So run you dumbass” he orders, Luffy blinks in confusion before flashing him a Monkey Smile

 

“I knew you were one of the good ones Smokie, don’t let anyone tell you different” Luffy calls back as the crew hightail it out of there, leaving only Smoker when the marines finally figure out what the hell is going on, the man walking straight over to the only compentant people in the city.

 

“Captain!” Tashigi greets as Smoker catches up to them

 

“Tashigi, Lucina, have every man we have converge on the capital right now” he puffs, the swordswoman salute while the taller bluenette looks confused

 

“But Sir, the Straw Hats are…” she argues

 

“…a pittance compared to a crime syndicate destabilising a country and trying to overthrow it’s World Government appointed leader” Smoker interrupts tensely

 

Lucina blinks “The rebels are Revolutionaries?”

 

Smoker shakes his head “No, they’re unwitting pawns and canon fodder for the true enemy; Baroque Works, run by the Warlord Crocodile himself. Until further notice nothing is to be done about Straw Hat and his crew, our focus is on Baroque works and Sir crocodile. Given Straw Hat admitted to only being in Alabasta to kick Crocodile’s ass there is a chance one of problems could take out the other, but I’d much prefer they both ended up in marine custody. Understood?”

 

Lucina nods and grits her teeth “It’s your hunt Smoker” she says lowly, annoyed she’d have to hold off removing that smug bastard’s head for a little longer “One more thing, I got in touch with Hina, her ship ran into some bad weather so was a little delayed while they adjusted course. Hopefully she’ll reach us in time to actually be helpful” she adds

 

“Good, that puts people I trust to hold the right end of a sword at 3” he mumbles to himself, then takes off in the direction of Alubarna

 

_ Back with the pirates _

 

“Good work finding this crab Chopper” Valentina praises the reindeer who squirms happily as the crew hop onto the moving crab Chopper had managed to find so they could cut their travel time down significantly, which considering they were on a timer was very good for everyone.

 

“And this one isn’t a pervert like the camel” Kaos teases, then frowns as he still couldn’t tell desert sand from Crocodile sand

 

“Ahh!” Vivi screams as she’s yanked off Scissors by Croc’s hook

 

“Vivi!” Luffy yells, wrapping his arms around her and kicking the sand, sure he probably couldn’t hurt crocodile in this form but what he could do was break the connection between his body and the hook long enough to free the princess, though he hadn’t expected the hook to crumble into sand too “We can’t just keep running in a desert, it’s his element” Luffy states seriously before dropping Vivi in Alvida’s lap

 

“Luffy, don’t” Kaos warns, seeing that expression before, but the rubber captain had already jumped off the back of the crab in the direction Crocodile’s hook had come from.

 

“We need to stop this crab!” Usopp shouts, about to force Chopper to pull the breaks, but was stopped by Zoro

 

“Idiot, he’s distracting Crocodile so we can get Vivi to the Capital, if we stop the gesture is worthless” the swordsman explains/scolds “Hurry up Chopper” he orders to which The Doctor nods

 

“Luffy, we’ll meet you in Alubarna, don’t take too long” Vivi yells, trying not to let the worry show in her voice

 

_ A little later _

 

Kaos sits at the back o the crab, clenched fists on his knees, until a much smaller hand finds his wrist

 

“Relax Papa, Luffy will be fine” Artemis states flatly, and despite that Kaos laughs, being reminded of himself trying to talk Ace out of his ‘protective older brother’ stress outs. Feeling the artist sit back to back with him, the tension leaks out and his hands open, now resting on his crossed legs and he could feel it, Luffy’s hyperactive energy even through the sand, both the real and Crocodile.

 

Everything was fine, right until that energy faltered, stuttering for a moment before returning, but it was the 2nd flicker where he lost it, the sandstorm too strong and Crocodile’s prescience in the sand for him to detect Luffy even a little and with that went any sense of calm in the purplette

 

It was less the strength as that speed which caught everyone off guard, things were fine besides the general unease and then they were nearly floored by a suffocating pressure, even causing the giant crab to stumble but keep walking, the simple creature more panicked than crushed by the pressure

 

_‘He can’t be, he just can’t. He’s too stubborn to die and he promised Vivi he’d see this through to the end’_ Kaos thinks as every muscle in his body tenses, wanting nothing more than to rip Crocodile’s still beating heart out of his chest and crush it. His thoughts continued to spiral for a couple minutes before an air of calm filled his bones and despite how obviously unnatural it was it still managed to overshadow his unease and make him sit properly and relax, and when he did he was smiling, there it was, weaker than it usually was but it was clearly Luffy and if he wasn’t mistaken Robin too.

 

“Okay, what the fuck was that?!” Nami practically screams, having noticed immediately both when Artemis put on and removed the green paint symbol on their 1st mate’s back

 

“Luffy’s alive” Kaos says with a slight slur, not fully back yet

 

“Great, but that doesn’t explain why it feels like my brain was being squeezed” Sanji grumbles

 

Kaos sighs “Because I lost him, for a moment but it was enough I began to panic and lost all concentration as well as the ability to detect him at all”

 

“You can track people?” Vivi asks, surprised that hadn’t come up before

 

“I can track Devil Fruit users, or at least know when they’re nearby”

 

“That’s how you knew we were Paramecia” Victor realised

 

“And Mr 3” Artemis adds, remembering what Kaos said _‘I could feel the heat of your wax from half way across the island…’_

 

“Then you can tell us where Crocodile is” Kaya suggests, but the thinning of the researcher/strategist’s lips told him that wasn’t that simple

 

“Logias are difficult, due to the way it works with their element, as well as their intangibility it spreads out the feeling, like Smoker in Loguetown, or the fact I’ve been tasting sand since we stepped into Rainbase. I can’t pinpoint him, but I don’t need to, to know he’s on the way to Alubarna, same as us” he explains, running his fingers through his hair

 

_ Meanwhile/earlier/with Luffy _

 

“Well looks like Vivi slipped through your fingers there Crocodile” Sunday notes, with her usual half smile, to which the warlord shrugs in response

 

“No matter, our agents are already gathering at Alubarna and will take out the princess the moment they find her” he replies

 

“CROCODILE!!!!!!” Luffy yells as he drops down in front of the 2

 

“So you’re alive Straw Hat. So tell me, why continue all this foolishness?” Crocodile asks

 

“It’s not foolishness, it’s not foolish to help your friends and Vivi cares about this country and is mad at all the destruction you have caused to it. Princess may be a slightly naïve optimist but that doesn’t mean I’m not going help her. I just wish she didn’t think this war could be settled without anyone dying”

 

Croc laughed “Nobody dying? And they say you’re the dim one. I presume that isn’t a viewpoint you share with Vivi?”

 

“Nope” Luffy replies automatically “But that doesn’t stop me from kicking your ass so we can end this war without Vivi killing herself trying to do the impossible”

 

Sunday chuckles and turns to leave, stopping when Crocodile calls to her “And where do you think you’re going Nico Robin?”

 

“This isn’t my fight, and you promised to never use my name while I worked for you. I’ll go on ahead while you deal with the little monkey” she answers walking off into the desert

 

“Damn unpredictable woman, you’d think threats would keep her in line but it just makes her more fucking mouthy” Crocodile grumbles before fishing a blade from his coat and throwing it in Luffy’s direction, the rubber boy seeing the hilt contained an hourglass style timer “I have 3 minutes to spare, but I doubt you’ll last even that long. Take your shot kid”

 

“With pleasure”

 

**Gum Gum Pistol**

 

The punch is dodged by crocodile who smirks before separating into sand, impossible to follow in the desert, reforming about a foot in front of Luffy who bends backward in order to avoid a hook through the face, setting up the Warlord for a…

 

**Gum Gum Stamp**

 

The kick tears through Crocodile’s body with ease, but as he’s a logia it doesn’t exactly do… anything, He reformed in seconds with the same smug look on his face as before

 

“This is a pointless fight boy, even you should know that, just give up and we can end this tedium quickly”

 

**Gum Gum Gattling**

 

Luffy’s response came in the form of rapid fire punches, each attack punching a large hole through the Sandman’s body which was quickly repaired almost immediately after his body left the cavity

 

**Gum Gum Bazooka**

**Gum Gum BattleAxe**

 

Even with the 2 attacks tearing through his entire chest cavity and then cleaving him in 2, Crocodile still returns, only looking very mildly annoyed at the time wasting Luffy was doing

 

“I grow tired of your games, time to end this…”

 

**Desert Spada**

 

The sand blade shoots through the desert and is just barely dodged by Luffy, actually a little impressed by the gorge Croc’s attack caused.

 

“You have good reflexes kid I’ll give you that, let’s see if you can dodge this!”

 

**Desert Girasole**

 

Luffy yelps as the ground around him collapses dropping him into some kind of sand whirlpool kind of structure. Panicking he tries to run out of the sinking sand, but he remains rather low in the pit

 

“Of all the techniques my devil fruit grants me, this is the most helpful I’ve found for making people _disappear_ , there’s no point fighting it, the sand will consume you and then I will go after and kill all of your friends” Crocodile gloats from the attack’s edge

 

“No, I’m not going to be beaten by this sand trap”

 

**Gum Gum Bazooka**

**Gum Gum Net**

 

The bazooka, aimed at the ground did a good job of getting him out of the trap, his attempt to catch Crocodile, not so much

 

“You are a simple minded fool and predictable”

 

**Crescent Cutlass**

 

Crocodile’s attack strike’s Luffy in the arm, pulling the moisture from him and causing his right arm to shrivel up like a mummy “Be glad all I struck was your arm boy, I could do this all day, systematically drying you out until you’re a pile of dust”

 

“No, it’s not going to end like this” Luffy yells, running over to the barrel he got from Toto and gulping it down, restoring his frail limb

 

“You’re only delaying the inevitable” Crocodile growls

 

“You think I’m predictable? Well how about something new!!!!!”

 

**Gum Gum Munch Munch**

 

Luffy’s head/mouth extends in a manner similar to a certain former king/current scumbag, biting off Croc’s upper torso as he sailed through the air. Unfortunately Croc was able to force his way out of Luffy’s mouth, and boy was he pissssssssssssssssssssssssssed!

 

“ENOUGH! Your 3 minutes are up, so now you will have to die”

 

**Sables**

 

From his hand the sand swirls, absorbing sand from the desert and growing larger until a proper sized sand storm was formed

 

“The prevailing winds in this land blow north to south, if I allow this little storm its freedom and it were to catch one of those winds it will grow exponentially until it was capable of destroying everything in its path. And do you know what would be destroyed first?”

 

“No. So tell me!”

 

Croc grins “Yuba”

 

Luffy’s eyes bulge and his teeth clench “You bastard! Why are you doing this?” He asks as he runs up to the Warlord who just stood there almost contently

 

“Because I can, and very soon my sandstorm will wipe Yuba off the map”

 

Luffy would probably have reacted to that… were he not trying to process the fact he’d just got a hook shoved in his gut

 

“Did you really think you stood a chance against me?” he asks, not even really looking at the boy skewered on his hook “You aren’t the first rookie to try fight me and as much as it annoys me you won’t be the last.” Crocodile says in a bored tone, until Luffy grabs his arm and squeezes ‘What? How are you still alive?’ He grimaces then tosses the broken teen into the still spinning vortex, if the hole in his chest doesn’t kill him suffocating under the sand or drowning in the underground waterways will, either way he’ll finally be out of his way.

 

_ Back with the others _

 

“Well, didn’t think Sanji being a girl crazy pervert would actually be helpful” Kaos says with a slight amused tone, his smile large enough to show his fangs but little else, Artemis nodding as she sat on his lap, back pressed against his chest “Just wish it didn’t mean I have to retract my _‘at least it’s not a pervert like Eyelash’_ comment” he mutters under his breath

 

“And Kaya is a remarkable dancer for such a sickly girl” the artist adds, watching the women of the group entice their current transport Scissors the moving crab to scuttle across the river, lucky this crew had a habit of attracting perverts as the grinning animal really liked the dancer girl outfits. Nami was the first to strip off her desert gear in favour of the dancer disguises their cook had gotten them, and seeing the love struck reaction he gave the navigator, Alvida, Valentina, Vivi and finally Kaya followed suit, even trying their hand at dancing to add to the appeal.

 

For a change it wasn’t just Sanji (and pervert camel) who couldn’t take their eyes off the dancing girls, Victor smiled as he watches his partner practically float around the crab’s back (Devil fruit related or just her normal grace?) while Usopp’s eyes never left his blond best friend’s form

 

“Seems everyone’s got a girl to watch, well except Sanji he’s watching everything that jiggles” Zoro jokes as he sits beside the duo

 

“True, though that means you’re focusing on something other than your swords, am I right?” Kaos flashes a grin “I mean I have Artemis to keep safe, so that just leaves you”

 

“Luffy wants us to keep the princess alive, so yeah I’ve got her in my sights. We’re not all perverts like swirly brow over there” he responds, both noticing Vivi looking carefree even if it was just for a few minutes

 

That carefree moment ended when the crab sank, seems even sexy girls can’t support a crab on water, meaning they had to swim the rest of the way, well until they ran into a giant catfish like creature, which was another thing on the list of dangerous things in Alabasta Vivi forgot to tell them about, as in the fact they like eating people! There was one moment of good luck though, as they were reunited with the Kung Fu Dugongs who promptly beat the ever loving crap out of the catfish, then helped the Straw Hats up so they could use it as a raft

 

“That was nice of them” Kaya says as the crew regain as much of their energy as they could with this momentary reprieve

 

“They said they were just looking out for their fellow pupils” Chopper explains/translates

 

“Wait, do they think Luffy is our master?” Usopp asks in confusion

 

“Either him or me, and given he’s our captain, it’s probably the best comparison they have” Kaos answers, lying on his back

 

“Don’t care, just glad we don’t have to swim anymore” Nami says with a sigh, the others agree, mostly because all the DF users basically impersonated limpets for the entire short swim due to the whole _‘water saps them of their strength’_ thing, and it wasn’t a pleasant experience for anyone involved.

 

_ On land _

 

“Thanks for the lift, bye” Chopper calls as the group leave the dugongs to their own things “Now what?”

 

“Now we have some small problems, mostly the fact I don’t know how long it’ll take to get to Alubarna from here, even if we were to ride Eyelash” Vivi admits with an undertone of irritation

 

“And considering the pervert carries 2 girls at the most, that leaves most of us without transport, half of which didn’t have a chance in the first place” Zoro adds, the guys still glaring at the camel.

 

“What’s that?” Alvida asks, pointing to what appeared to be a dust cloud flowing towards their location

 

“Is it Baroque Works?” Nami asks

 

“Is it another sand storm?” Valentina counters

 

**_Quack_ **

 

Vivi flashes a momentary D grin, before laughing “It’s something much better than that, it’s Carue and the Super Sonic Duck Squad!”

 

“The who/what now?” the Straw Hats ask in confusion as a familiar duck appears, followed by an entire flock of them

 

_ Back with Luffy _

 

Sunday looks down with something akin to curiosity and pity as she uses her fruit to lift the heavily injured boy from the sand trap, the extended summoning arms dropping him on the ground beside her.

 

“Thank you” Luffy wheezes, still clutching his perforated torso as he lays on mostly stable ground one more

 

“Why do you fight?” Sunday asks, her expression serious but mostly blank “The D’s I mean?” she elaborates, mostly because she was unsure as to whether Luffy’s confused face was because he didn’t understand the question, was a little out of it due to blood loss or was just that dim ‘ _Should have captured and ‘ **interrogated** ’ the other one, least then I’d get an answer_’ she thinks with a sigh “Apparently you don’t have a clue what I’m talking about, which is a shame” she says, mostly to herself given Luffy’s condition as she catches his hat which another of her bloomed arms retrieved from the sand

 

“I found you” Robin turns her head and sees Pell slowly walk towards her, his expression clearly one that promises vengeance “Where is Vivi?”

 

“Well look who’s up and awake, that was pretty quick, but I expected nothing less from Alabasta’s greatest warrior” Sunday grins as she tosses the straw hat onto Luffy’s chest

 

“I won’t be beaten again woman, I know your fruit’s power and won’t be tricked again” the bird man states, raising his sword

 

Sunday rolls her eyes and waves him off, before walking away herself “Don’t overstress your injuries the princess would cry if you died. Why don’t you do something useful and save the boy before he dies” she says as she walks over to her transport, a smaller bananagator “After all if it wasn’t for him who knows what could have happened to your precious Vivi” she sits on the beast and turns once more to the royal guard “If she’s lucky Luffy’s crew and Vivi should be almost at Alubarna by now. Thought you deserved an answer to your question as thanks for saving the kid’s life” she winks at him before her gator speeds off, leaving nothing but a smoke trail of sand behind seconds later.

 

‘Damn it, what can I do, who can protect Vivi now?’ Pell’s inner thoughts were interrupted by a hand on his sleeve, which despite his efforts wouldn’t let go “What the hell?”

 

“BRING ME MEAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 

TBC

 

LW: Well, looks like we’re on the brink of a war, let’s hope everyone can hold on until the next chapter…. Please?

 

**_ Info dump _ **

 

_ Crocodile _

Desert Spada – His hand shifts into a blade of loose, fast moving sand, which he uses to cleave through anything in front of him

Desert Girasole – Like Spada, his hand shifts into sand, except this time he slams it into the ground, forming a sink hole

Crescent Cutlass – Sand blade which he uses to remove the moisture out of anything it touches, even being able to direct/localise it to specific body parts (such as Luffy’s arm)

Sables – OP move in a desert island like Alabasta. Basically it allows him to summon a sandstorm.

 

 

**Kao’s sensory ability** : It is based on a power in One Piece and I’m sure anyone who’s read that far into the series knows what it is, 100% certain I’m using it wrong but it does give you a glimpse into which version of that power he’ll excel at.

**The pressure** : Also based on a canon OP power, though in this case it behaves more like when in BLEACH one of the powerhouses flare their spiritual pressure and the weaker characters feel like their being crushed simply standing in their presence. Easiest example is when Yamamoto was about to fight Shunsui and Ukitake, he let his power off it’s reins and Nanao could barely remain conscious.


	36. Straw Hats Vs Baroque Works For real this time!

LW: So, here we are, doing it right this time. Enjoy

 

Rubber King and Mirror Master – Straw Hats Vs Baroque Works, for real this time!

Aka Battle of Alabasta, Part 1

 

“Okay, so we have ducks, and they’re actually faster than I expected, but what are we going to do once we get to Alubarna? I doubt the rebel leader is in a mood to talk” Nami asks as the crew ride on Carue’s backup duck squad

 

“Finding somewhere to scout would be a good idea, we’re still ahead of the rebels, if only because we can’t hear the pitched battle you’d expect for something like this” Usopp suggests, getting nods from the others

 

Vivi points ahead of them “There’s a rocky bluff just over there, we’ll stop and try figure out where everything is when we get there, that good enough for everyone?”

 

“Yep”

 

“Good, the other option was flying blind, something we’ve been doing too much of on this journey” the princess grumbles to herself mostly, but Zoro being the closest did hear and snorts, they’ve been flying blind since they entered the Grand Line, maybe earlier if he was being honest with himself, though the concept wasn’t exactly new do him given his poor sense of direction after all.

 

_ Outcrop _

 

“Oh shit, it’s the 1’s and 4’s” Vivi gasps, passing the binoculars back to Kaos

 

“The 1’s could be a problem but the 4’s should be no big deal, after all we beat Mr. 3” Usopp boasts

 

**_Quack, Quack, Quack_ **

 

“She says **WE** didn’t beat Mr. 3, Luffy did, plus we only beat him and saved the others because his partner betrayed him” Chopper translates, the long nose droops when the others nod along with her, Artemis most of all

 

“So any preferences?” Zoro asks, grinning at the chance of a fight

 

“Dibs on Miss All Sunday” Kaos declares, reminding the crew that even if they don’t see her they’ll have to deal with Crocodile’s partner as well as him eventually.

 

“Oh no you don’t! You harm one hair on her beautiful head I’ll…” Sanji begins to rant but Kaos clearly isn’t in the mood, so puts his hand on the back of the cook’s head and slams him face first into the ground

 

“Shut up, we don’t have time for your perverted chivalry, go find that ballerina when we get into the city” he orders, Sanji grumbles but nods, Kaos was acting captain until Luffy comes back after all, plus Mr. 2 did seem like the kind to have a fighting style involving his legs.

 

“Well Valentina, want to try get that promotion?” Victor jokes to his partner, who smirks evilly

 

“It’s on! I’m going to beat that hag into the Red Line!” the kilo girl declares

 

Vivi sweat drops “That’s nice, but we still need a way to get into the capital as well as get the 1s and 4s to split up”

 

Nami smirks as she looks from the former agents to the rest of the crew and back, Carue looking confused when she focuses on her “Don’t worry Vivi, I have an idea”

 

_ A little later _

 

“Hmm, seems the reports about any of the Straw hats having intelligence were exaggerating Mr. 1” the bluenette beside him comments “Charging right at us is beyond stupid”

 

Mr 1 frowns at his partner “Things are rarely as they appear Miss Doublefinger, you’d do well to remember that” he says flatly, the duck riding pirates getting closer, from what little could be seen it appeared Vivi was leading the charge.

 

“StopRightTherePrincess.There’sNowhereToRu…urk” Miss Merry Christmas groans as Vivi hops off her duck, their long legs slam the round woman face first into the ground, followed by using her as a springboard to jump over the others, the remaining ducks trampling her fully into the ground.

 

“It’s a trick!” Mr. 1 yells, slashing at the fake princess with his blades, tearing through the cloth

 

“Hey Lady Deathstrike!” he turns and looks up to see Kaos grinning as he dangles from the wall “You missed. Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop” he cackles as he hops up and runs along the roofs

 

“Mirror Master Kaos” 1 mutters before turning to the other 3 agents “Split up, the princess has to have been mixed in with the other pirates” They nod and begin to move, only for an explosion to go off between the 1’s and 4’s.

 

“Mr. 4! Miss Merry Christmas! We’re calling you lardasses out” Valentina yells, Victor beside her with a serious expression on his face.

 

“Don’t just stand there, deal with them” Doublefinger hisses, waving her hands in a shooing motion, mostly to piss off Merry Christmas, because it was fun

 

_ In Alubarna _

 

‘ _Fuck, how does someone lose a princess?_ ’ Kaos thinks to himself, making his way through the streets, until he yelps and ducks a sword swing “Shit, not you again!”

 

Lucina growls “I don’t know what part you play in this, but I’m taking you down”

 

“Kind of busy at the moment, any chance of a rain check?” he smiles weakly, then jumps out of the way of another swing ‘I’ll take that as a no’ Kaos thinks

 

“I will eliminate you in the name of justice!” Lucina shrieks, Kaos narrowly avoiding getting his head lopped off

 

The reflect human was glad his reflexes were good enough to keep the blade at bay for as long as he had (though he’d never tell Garp that, didn’t want the idiot to think his insane _training regime_ was a good idea after all), but eventually Lucina got the upper hand and her sword stabbed through his shoulder, pinning him to the wall

 

“Fuck!” Kaos hissed, the wound burning like a hot iron had been stabbed into it, but there was also the draining feel underneath it like he had been dunked in seawater

 

Lucina wraps her hand around his neck, Kaos too out of it due to the seastone to stop her when…

 

“Shit, the marines are here too!”

 

Both turn (well Kaos’ eyes flick over to where the voices came from) and see a palace guard and rebel solider, standing at the entrance of the alley Lucina had funnelled him into. They turn to one another, nod and raise their rifles, chanting “For Baroque Works” as they fire

 

Kaos just manages to avoid biting through his tongue as Lucina reefs the sword from him in order to deflect the bullets away. The millions realise they’d fucked up when Lucina yells and tears them apart with Parallel Falchion, the blade slicing through their weapons as easily as their bodies

 

“ _I’ll need to watch out for her in the future_ ” Kaos thinks, using the distraction to put some well needed distance between himself and Captain Nylock, it was while slipping between streets he noticed something ‘ _Well, this could be fun_ ’ he thinks with a wide grin, letting his fruit’s power flow over his entire form _‘I’ve only gotten to use this once since we started out, Luffy will be so pissed he missed this again’_

 

_ Outside the city _

 

“Damn it, we lost them already” Valentina huffs, kicking up the sand before sitting

 

“It’s not that simple Val, they wouldn’t be high ranked numbers if they were that weak. They’re clearly up to something”

 

_Thump Thump_

 

“Guys! We have a problem” Chopper yells, the other seeing the sink holes opening up in the sand near him, then hearing Merry Christmas’ voice coming from the holes

 

“I hope you didn’t think we’d be beaten that easily. Time to show off our Number 4 batter” she cackles and from one of the larger hole Mr. 4 rises, swinging a baseball bat around as he does

 

“He doesn’t look so tough” Alvida comments, her grip tightening on her mace reflectively

 

“True, but I get the feeling he’s at least better with that thing than Mr. 9 was” Victor adds, still unsure what to make of these 2 agents.

 

“Do they have Devil fruits?” Usopp asks, getting shrugs from the defectors

 

“Christmas most likely does, how else could she make these holes, but 4? No clue whatsoever”

 

Bark

 

“Four!” the rotund man yells, smacking the incoming ball towards the pirates who jump out of the way just in time to avoid the explosion

 

“Holy shit, exploding baseballs!” Usopp yelps

 

“Yep, definitely more of a threat than 9 ever was” Valentina confirms, though is confused by Victor’s smile “What now?”

 

The 4’s forgot something important”

 

“Four!” another baseball

 

**Boom**. _Puff._

 

“Being a bomb man, means I’m explosion proof” Victor grins and Mr. 4 has to sink below the sand rather quickly to avoid an exploding snot ball in response

 

“Well that means one of us is safe, but where’s he getting those balls in the first place?” Chopper asks, then gets tapped on the arm by Usopp

 

“I’m going to go out on a limb and say that monstrosity over there” he suggests in a panicked tone, pointing to a dog/bazooka hybrid monster

 

“Does a Grenade-grenade fruit even exist?” Alvida wonders aloud, just before the dog-thing sneezes, shooting another ball which 4 redirects towards the crew “No thanks you can have it back!” the smooth woman retorts as she smacks it with her mace, though her aim is off and the explosion takes out some ruins instead “Damn it”

 

“Impressive” Alvida turns behind her to see Merry Christmas pop out of one of the holes “I’ve never seen anyone be able to redirect one of Mr.4 or Lasso’ balls before, given they’re time bombs and weight as much as a cannonball, but somehow a twig of a woman like you can do that. That makes no sense. ExplainWomanExplain!” she screams, then has to jump into one of her holes to dodge Alvida and Usopp’s attacks, the Exploding Star missing by an inch, which was less than the mace which came nowhere close

 

“Shit, I just realised what this is” Valentina says with a groan “We’re about to enter a fucked up version of whack a mole” the others stop for a moment to consider her words…. And the swearing begins

 

“Well that’s one way to look at it, plus its delicious irony given I ate the Mole Mole fruit. Luckily thanks to all my holes we’ll be just as hard to hit as the moles in that game, and we hit back”

 

Bark Bark Bark

 

“FOUR!” The rotund man drones, sending a trio of baseball bombs at the crew

 

“I got thi…”

 

_Thump_

 

The ground opens up at Victor’s feet, causing him to fall into the hole, the balls flying unimpeded and clocking Usopp in the face, as well as Chopper in the chest.

 

“That was actually smart, who knew these dumbasses had 2 brain cells to rub together” Valentina muses as her 1 kg form floats onto Alvida’s shoulder like she ate the parrot variant of the Bird Bird fruit “But they made one little miscalculation. Everyone get away from the holes!” she yells as loud as she could

 

“What?”

 

**KABOOM!**

 

“Stupid penguin, my body is a bomb, the only thing that would have stopped me blowing my way out of those tunnels would have been sea prism stone cuffs” Victor smirks as he pulls himself out of the now larger hole he’d fallen into, his full body detonation setting off a chain reaction throughout the entire molehill Merry Christmas had created “Go fuck yourselves and the cannon dog you rode in on” he grunts, spitting into the hole as one last attempt at clearing house, the explosion caused was much smaller as would be expected.

 

_ Elsewhere – Sanji _

 

Due to the erratic way in which the Straw Hats split up, it’s no wonder Vivi as well as each other’s locations were lost rather quickly, Sanji only running into Vivi accidentally on his path to finding Bon Clay but he was glad to run into the okama when he did, intercepting an attack on the princess and a barely conscious Carue, pissing him off as while not human Vivi’s companion/familiar was an honorary lady in his book, so seeing the poor duck that badly hurt sparked righteous fury in his heart.

 

“Vivi, don’t you have a rebellion to stop? I’ll deal with this creep, you head off and we’ll let the ducks get Carue to safety” he says, straightening his suit as 2 of the supersonic ducks tried get her onto the larger one’s back, to which Sanji smiles softly and lifts her “Get her out of here, it’s a literal war zone and those injuries look serious. Now Go!” he gives the bird a light slap on the flank, emitting a small yelp before running off in a plump of dust “Now that’s over, it’s just you and me dumbass”

 

Bon Clay stands and smirks “Yes but not for long, nothing I’ve fought so far has been able to stand up to more than a handful of strikes of my okama kempo!” he boasts flamboyantly. That boast would have meant something had Sanji not been able to block his kick with one of his own almost lazily

 

“You only fight Usopp on this island, that kick was weak. My old man kicks harder than that and he’s got a peg leg” Sanji taunts as he blocks another of Mr. 2’s ballet kicks

 

_ Elsewhere – Zoro _

 

Once he entered the capital, Zoro took off in a random direction to the other 4 to enter, partly as that had been the plan (to get the agents to split up and divide their forces) but it was also proof of how easily Zoro could get lost. So here he was, standing somewhere near the middle of town, with no idea where he was, or where everyone else was either, at least until…

 

“Roronoa Zoro!”

 

‘ _Ah shit’_ Zoro groans internally, seeing Tashigi marching over to him, hand clenched around Shiguri’s hilt “Listen, this isn’t the best time…”

 

“Shut up!” she yells in his face “I’ve tried to do this politely, but if you refuse to surrender those swords to most deserving hands I’ll take them by force”

 

“Yeah right, the only way you’d get these swords and more importantly be considered deserving of them is to beat me in a fight. Until then, go stick the hilt in your mouth and go annoy someone else” Zoro replies with a scoff, then as his well honed situational awareness kicked in the swordsman jumps at the marine sword-otaku. As Tashigi yelps Zoro knocks her to the ground, just barely avoiding a slash from Mr 1, deep gashes in the stone wall behind them fairly conclusive proof of that

 

“What the fuck was that for?” Tashigi screams at Zoro, her cheeks red and blotchy (Zoro’s not much better) “Also get off me, you brute!”

 

“A thank you would be nice” Zoro grumbles as he stands, the marine finally noticing the damage done to the wall exactly where her head had been previously, the colour draining from her face. “So, no problem with collateral damage eh Mr.1?” he asks the stoic looking man in front of him.

 

“None. You’re Zoro right? The Straw Hat’s Swordsman?” Mr 1 answers and then asks, smiling ever so slightly when Zoro nods and reaches for his swords “I was hoping to get to fight you”

 

_ Vivi _

 

As she ran through the streets, Vivi was running on fumes physiologically, seeing so many people being killed or maimed needlessly, under the orders of people she cared about, it was cutting her up inside worse than any blade.

 

_‘Luffy, Carue, and all the others, risking their very lives and for what?_ ’ she thinks as tears glisten in her clenched shut eyes, then her teeth clench, his hands curl into fists and the anger rises from the sea of depression and pity she was wallowing in _‘No! I have to do this, they’re counting on me! Everyone in Alabasta is counting on me! I won’t let HIM WIN!’_ pushing herself to keep walking Vivi turns her attention to the palace, knowing Chakka would be much easier to find than Koza.

 

TBC

 

LW: Well, shit’s happening and I hopefully delivered on my promise.

 

Merry Christmas: Eater of the Mole Mole fruit/ Mogu Mogu no mi

 

Lassoo: A gun that ate the Dog Dog fruit/Inu Inu no mi model Dachshund.

No that hasn’t been explained as to how an inanimate object can ‘ ** _eat_** ’ something, but it’s happened a couple of times in the series, Lassoo was just the first.

 

Q: Can we mark standing in front of the stampede known as the rebel army count as Vivi’s dumbest decision? Cause it has to be at least pretty high if it isn’t

 

This is the last chapter of One Piece for 2018, so thanks to everyone who started reading or has continued to read my work this year and I hope you come back in 2019, chapter 37 will be out on the 5th of January providing I can keep my schedule going.

 

Merry Christmas to all and a Happy New Year!


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